39 minutes ago, Cam said:
Adidas, your personal story impresses me. It seems you’ve come a long way! I’m not quite sure if you mean fundy life when you say fundy lite or if the lite part is a real thing. (If so, I’m not sure what that is). But that you’ve evolved to the extent that you now post on this site is quite a journey. I’m very appreciative of those who lived the fundy life sharing their experiences because it’s truly the most insightful kind to the lifestyle.
Maybe it is that Jill and Derrick’s relationship also evolves. It may not be totally egalitarian (had to look the word up) but it is definitely far less restrictive than what JB permitted. I also think it’s a generational thing, where Jill and Derrick’s influences have been different than JB/Michele.
That they went to couples therapy and let the public know was a very positive thing.
Sibling relationships evolve, too. I have six so I know a bit about that. Jill’s independence from JB could have been too jarring at first for Joy to accept or understand. Then after awhile as life moves forward, Jill’s actions become more normalized and even expected, so there is more acceptance on the siblings part.
Fundy lite is a term for people who don't have the extreme trappings of fundies, but many of the harmful beliefs.
My mom was fundy lite after leaving the Catholic church. In her church the women wore pants, could have short hair, could work....kids usually went to Christian or public schools (in my area/era homeschooling wasn't a thing tmk), there were some bigger families but no one was quiverful, there were modesty standards but not to the extreme and not for little ones to my knowledge.
But if you didn't believe as they did you were bound for hell. Strong anti-Catholic and other "heathen" sentiment, purity culture strong enough to mess anyone up. Big on missions even to already Christian countries (don't ask me why they had to raise money for a mission trip to Scotland. The Scots have heard of Jesus.)
And the modesty stuff was weird. Like you could wear pants, but all skirts had to be below the knee and I remember one girl getting in big trouble for embarrassing her mom because she wore a pair of flats that showed toe cleavage. I had NO idea what toe cleavage was or why it was wrong, but apparently its if your shoe is low enough to show the the "cleavage" where your toes meet and that's crazy tempting or something. Idk, 12 year old me had no idea one's feet could drive men to thoughts of lust but apparently her mom did. She was as mad as if she showed up to church in a bikini.
But anecdata aside, fundy lite is a lot of the hate with less of the external weirdness so they blend into society better.