Kelly Bates is grateful to not deal with the bills

[alysee]

In her latest post she says

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I’ve heard others say that a mother has the most difficult and most important job in the world… I’m not so sure! I know I wouldn’t be able to trade places with my husband in fulfilling his role as Dad! Decisions are hard for me; pressure is hard for me to cope with; bills are a nightmare… I’m just not cut out to carry the load that he does so well!

 

I’m so grateful and so blessed to be by his side and to watch the example he sets for his children!

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This kills me why can't she figure it out? She's a grown woman with a ton of kids. Will Zack take her in and the young kids if Gil was to die tomorrow?

[duplessis3]

She has never paid a bill in her life; she hasnt been allowed to make the simpliest of decisions. So the reasons she appreciates Gil is based on what she imagines. It is so pathetic.

[pixydust]

This woman is a college graduate?!?

[socalrules]

She can't handle bills, making decisions or being under pressure? So she has the maturity level of a seven year-old? Why do married fundy women want to be seen as children so daddy/hubby can deal with problems even the most immature 16 year-old can figure out how to solve? I hate, hate, hate, hate women who act as though being female makes you too delicate to deal with normal issues so a man is needed to shoulder the load.

Kelly wants to put her head in the sand and pretend that she is not also responsible for the financial problems that are occurring because she is the little woman. Having a million kids makes like hard financially and emotionally, leading to tough decisions that should be made by both parents. Common sense, which i know is lacking in this family, would say that if the Bates sent their kids to regular school, obtained jobs like normal parents and accepted government help, maybe there would a little less pressure because the bills will be paid. These are people who want to prove you can raise an enormous family without having a real job.

Anyway, why is Gil getting credit for dealing with the bills? Everyone knows Lawson is the reason there is food on the table. I have no doubt that Lawson is responsible for paying for most of the bills in that family.

The worst thing is that she is raising her daughters to be exactly like her. This cycle will only continue to repeat itself.

[fluttershies]

This woman is a college graduate?!?

That's the alarming thing. Surely the move (in the US) from compulsory education to college is all about working self-sufficiently and making decisions on your own initiative?

[Witsec7]

This woman is a college graduate?!?

Does anyone know if it was a real college?

[lilith]

Does anyone know if it was a real college?

It was a Christian college, I don't know if it was accredited, probably was, cause Gil went there too, and he had a real job til god told him to quit it.

[slickcat79]

Well, it does make the bills a bit harder to deal with when you have to figure out how to pay them with no money :roll:

I know it's father's day and all, but he does not deserve that much credit for his piss poor job at providing for his family.

[SisiL78]

I like that my FH takes care of the bills. But, I could take over if need be. I get that its easier to have one person take over the bill management. Ok, so I'll buy that one. But, paying the bills is not hard. Its pretty friggin' easy if you have money in the bank and access to the interwebs for about 30 minutes a month (max) and a checkbook and a pen and some stamps.

But she can't handle stress? Seriously? You are claiming to simultaneously educate 20 children of different ages for goodness sake. That's a job that requires a serious commitment, as well as the ability to make lots of decisions every day, AND the ability to handle stress well and keep everything going.

[OkToBeTakei]

It was a Christian college, I don't know if it was accredited, probably was, cause Gil went there too, and he had a real job til god told him to quit it.

He worked for Nabisco (sp) Which is fairly global. But the trees were calling. I assume he had an 'Executive' position...did he? They do seem slightly more 'educated' than their friends, not hard with JimBob.

[divadivine]

She strikes me as the type of girl/lady/young woman who went to college to get her Mrs.

She's not exactly the brightest bulb on the bush, folks. Good thing she found Gil lord knows she probably couldn't have made it as a single women in the wicked world.

[Witsec7]

I'm thinking Ms. Bates has a degree in learned helplessness.

[emmyfair]

I'm thinking Ms. Bates has a degree in learned helplessness.

Excellent point. I guess should Gil ever shuffle off this mortal coil, her sons will have to step up and take care of her...

[StarrieEyedKat]

I'm thinking Ms. Bates has a degree in learned helplessness.

Isn't that what AD suffered from? Fundie trend!

[silverspoons]

I don't know how she could live not knowing what was going on with the bills and money. 3 years ago I got very sick and was in the hospital and the dr said I had to stop doing so much and be as stressfree as possible. I also could not drive for almost 2 years. It was so hard to give up control. My husband did all the shopping and bill paying. All our bills are pretty much the same every month so I told him only tell tell me if all bill was not normal or if our savings went down. It was hard to give up some control but we actually saved more money that year. I am happy to be somewhat better and able to take on everything jointly again.

What bills do they have water? electricty? taxes? I bet it is the medical bills that are a nightmare. My impression it is Gil's job to barter with the medical bills. Im sure it is a headache and if I had no insurance and 19 kids it would be something I would not want to have to deal with. I have double health coverage and I still have constant billing issues. I bet Gil has to go down and show proof of income to the hospital and make out payments plans all the time. I'm surprised the hospital they use the ER for care at doesn't force them on medcaid or CHIP. When I was sick I had a billing advocate sort out the paperwork and she said if someone incurs major expenses and is uninsured she tries to find any government program before the hospital does a write off.

[PennySycamore]

It was a Christian college, I don't know if it was accredited, probably was, cause Gil went there too, and he had a real job til god told him to quit it.

Both Anderson College, where Kelly and Gil went to junior college, and Carson-Newman are accredited and both are Baptist schools. Anderson became a 4-year school in the early 90s after Furman University broke its ties to the Baptist Convention. I don't think that Anderson has a sterling reputation academically. I knew a woman who graduated from Anderson and she was not all that bright. I don't know about Carson-Newman's academic reputation.

I agree that Kelly went to college for her MRS degree.

[divadivine]

They Bates graduated from Carson-Newman College. From what I've read by skimming their website, it seems legit.

"Carson-Newman College is accredited by the Commission on Colleges of the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools to award baccalaureate and masters degrees."

They've also been recognized in publications and by different organizations for their programs.

http://www.cn.edu/about-c-n/rankings-and-recognitions

Why couldn't Erin or any of the other kids go to school there? It's a Christian school??

[SisiL78]

The fact of the matter is that there are men and women who get degrees from legit universities who are still completely helpless. I know women from schools that are recognizeable and not fundy related but they graduate unable to make a single decision. I guess that's fine. If they find themselves a patriarch to take care of them and manage their lives I guess it has worked out for them in a way.

What I can't stomach is her basically admitting that everything mentally challenging is too hard for her yet she continues this farce about actually educating her kids at SOTDRT. If you can admit that you get easily stressed and have a hard time making decisions and using your brain then why oh why are you not sending your kids to a real school where people who ARE mentally equipped to make decisions and think challenging thoughts teach your kids the three Rs... Argh.

[Maude]

It's because of what they won't come out and directly admit - They don't want their children to be educated. They know that the more they're exposed to, the more likely it is they'll develop interests and opinions not approved of in their lifestyle/cult.

[lilith]

It's because of what they won't come out and directly admit - They don't want their children to be educated. They know that the more they're exposed to, the more likely it is they'll develop interests and opinions not approved of in their lifestyle/cult.

They want to teach them very specific skills, not educate them in the broader sense of teaching them to reason and question and think.

They want them to have basic reading, writing and maths skills, enough music knowledge to perform hymns as a family, very basic computer skills. The girls need to be able to cook, sew and clean, the boys need to know what is neccessary for the role they take in the tree trimming company. And how to pay bills like big manly assertive men, of course.

Most of that can be learnt by observation of the sibling just ahead of them under the supervision of the older SOTDRT graduates.

I doubt Kelly really has to do much schooling at all.

[bea]

Oh honey, really?

Like Mrs. Bates, I am a stay-at-home mom. Before that, I was a stay-at-home wife. UNLIKE Mrs. Bates, I have a decent education and a solid job history, so that if anything were to happen to Mr. B, we wouldn't fucking STARVE.

Also, I took over paying the bills when we got married, because while he is an excellent tax attorney, Mr. B can never manage to get the phone bill paid on time. He doesn't even have a checkbook or his own credit card - I handle all our household finances because....drumroll please.....I'm the one that knows how much we need to live on. He doesn't do the grocery shopping, or get the car fixed, or do any of that crummy boring day-to-day crap that's entailed in running a household.

I also can't get past this idea that everything is SO HARD for Mrs. Bates, yet she's fully capable of teaching her kids everything they need to know. O RLY? what if they need to know how to pay the damn electricity bill?

[CrazySister]

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I also can't get past this idea that everything is SO HARD for Mrs. Bates, yet she's fully capable of teaching her kids everything they need to know. O RLY? what if they need to know how to pay the damn electricity bill?

This has always struck me as so odd - they claim the women can't do anything without the men and how stupid the women are supposed to be, how sorry and pathetic and dependant on the penis they are and all that, and yet the women are the ones teaching the next generation. How does THAT make sense?!

[countressrascal]

If I left it up to the Count to pay the bills in our household, it would never get done. I have always controlled the finances in our household. It is one of the keys to our happy marriage going on 30 years.

[Mela99]

Never knew that having that many kids was a pressure free environment...

[Jezebel Duggar]

Does she think sounding pathetic and helpless is a good way to get fans for her show?