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In a future husband don't settle for...


dairyfreelife

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a passive man who respects you.

joleneengle.org/2012/06/what-not-to-settle-for-in-your-future.html

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This so stupid. I respect my husband very much, but he just isn't a "leader" type. It's not his thing and that's fine. It doesn't make him weak or less manly. I would take my kindhearted, shy husband over whatever brute she married any day of the week.

I am not familiar with her blog, but if this is the first thing I've read from her then I am not hopeful for the rest. :D

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Beta men (and one specifically) rock my world. The Uber-Alpha man does nothing for me.

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Beta men (and one specifically) rock my world. The Uber-Alpha man does nothing for me.

Uber-alpha men turn me into an uber-uber-alpha woman. It's how God made me and how God made my parents lives very difficult when I was growing up.

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Beta men (and one specifically) rock my world. The Uber-Alpha man does nothing for me.

Beta men are awesome. This said by a beta woman. :) It makes it difficult to pick a restaurant sometimes, but otherwise it's a great relationship.

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Beta men are awesome. This said by a beta woman. :) It makes it difficult to pick a restaurant sometimes, but otherwise it's a great relationship.

Ditto!! :D

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Ditto!! :D

:lol: "Where should we go for dinner?" "I don't know, what do you feel like?" "Whatever you want's fine by me!" "Er.... But I don't care." "I don't either." We have that conversation a few times a year and I usually end up choosing just to get some damned food in my belly!

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I am a tightly-wound, anal-retentive Type A personality and my husband is a totally laid back, sweet Type B. We balance each other out. I can't imagine being married to someone who would mirror my typical anxieties and cynicism, making them even WORSE. The thought is terrifying.

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:lol: "Where should we go for dinner?" "I don't know, what do you feel like?" "Whatever you want's fine by me!" "Er.... But I don't care." "I don't either." We have that conversation a few times a year and I usually end up choosing just to get some damned food in my belly!

Ha! We have the exact same conversations. Sometimes we just open a local magazine and point at a place in the restaurant listings to solve the non-argument.

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I am a tightly-wound, anal-retentive Type A personality and my husband is a totally laid back, sweet Type B. We balance each other out. I can't imagine being married to someone who would mirror my typical anxieties and cynicism, making them even WORSE. The thought is terrifying.

Sounds like my brother and his wife. It's not that my brother can't make decisions, it's just that most of the time, he's perfectly happy to go along with what she wants. If it doesn't matter to him and it does to her, making a fuss is a waste of time and energy.

Personally I want a partner, not a leader, should I ever get married.

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Sounds like my brother and his wife. It's not that my brother can't make decisions, it's just that most of the time, he's perfectly happy to go along with what she wants. If it doesn't matter to him and it does to her, making a fuss is a waste of time and energy.

Personally I want a partner, not a leader, should I ever get married.

Here here. My husband has some areas in which he is more the leader, and I have my areas in which I am more the leader. TBH I'm probably leader in about 2/3 the decisions and he is the other 1/3...but he's also not an Alpha male, so that is ok with him.

Why oh why do fundies believe every human being should fit neatly into a labeled box? If their god wanted us to all be that way he would have made us that way.

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Why oh why do fundies believe every human being should fit neatly into a labeled box? If their god wanted us to all be that way he would have made us that way.

Because otherwise people might start thinking for themselves.

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I would just resent being referred to as a "sweet single sister". I used to hate the overuse of the word sweet and amount of pinkness and flowers on all the women's stuff at church. I also used to spend my life envious of what the men had on their breakfast menu!

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I am a tightly-wound, anal-retentive Type A personality and my husband is a totally laid back, sweet Type B. We balance each other out. I can't imagine being married to someone who would mirror my typical anxieties and cynicism, making them even WORSE. The thought is terrifying.

THIS!

my husband and i have a similar relationship. I'm "wound tighter than a 10 day clock "as my mother puts it and I have a very bad habit of getting really upset really quickly about stuff. My husband? is a slow burn. He can stop, think things through and calm me down.

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Alpha male!....pfft.

There are many other letters in the ancient greek alphabet. I wanna know what omega man has to offer. Sounds intriguing. Alpha male is like a contestant on Survivor ie no interest to me.

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My husband and I are both type-A which mostly works out, sometimes we have to set boundaries though. :?

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Beta men are awesome. This said by a beta woman. :) It makes it difficult to pick a restaurant sometimes, but otherwise it's a great relationship.

My husband is definitely a beta man. If he had to pick a restaurant by himself, he'd never eat! :lol:

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In a future husband don't settle for...

A man who neglects himself hygienically and then wonders why you don't want him to come near you.

A man who dismisses any questions or concerns as "bullshit", claiming they'll disappear after the wedding.

A man who belittles your opinions when they differ from his.

A man who does not treat you kindly.

A man who calls you a "gold-digging Jew", a "terrible person", and a "liar".

I almost settled for these things. Glad I didn't!

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a passive man who respects you.

joleneengle.org/2012/06/what-not-to-settle-for-in-your-future.html

What??

Why the hell not?

My hubby is passive, he is certainly not a leader, but he is the most loving, kind, caring, respectful and sweet man that I have ever met. We've been very happily married for over 20 years. I didn't 'settle' for him; I chose him and he chose me. As for leading me, he has no desire to lead me nor do I ahve the desire to be led. We are equal partners in this marriage.

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I am a tightly-wound, anal-retentive Type A personality and my husband is a totally laid back, sweet Type B. We balance each other out. I can't imagine being married to someone who would mirror my typical anxieties and cynicism, making them even WORSE. The thought is terrifying.

THIS!

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Alpha male!....pfft.

There are many other letters in the ancient greek alphabet. I wanna know what omega man has to offer. Sounds intriguing.

Nothing good, I'm afraid. :lol: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Omega_Man

Another alpha control freak here partnered with a beta dude. I definitely would not like to be paired up with a clone of myself. My husband keeps me zen, or tries to. Two of me would be like two neurotics on an airplane: "Did you feel that bump? I definitely felt it. Does that flight attendant look nervous? I think she's avoiding eye contact. Okay, we must definitely be going down. Let's jump..."

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Nothing good, I'm afraid. :lol: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Omega_Man

Another alpha control freak here partnered with a beta dude. I definitely would not like to be paired up with a clone of myself. My husband keeps me zen, or tries to. Two of me would be like two neurotics on an airplane: "Did you feel that bump? I definitely felt it. Does that flight attendant look nervous? I think she's avoiding eye contact. Okay, we must definitely be going down. Let's jump..."

Hmmmm...i guess I should do some research . Still, the manga Omegaman sounded better than the dorky alpha headship model. Is fundie alpha along the lines of jimbob or doug? Ew.

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I just love the sweeping generalities, but, then, I am a heathen leaning, mouthy dame, who does not know her place.

I'll praise David Bowie, today's higher power, for my husband, who only pulls macho crap to be funny. We have what my first marriage (to an Uber fundie) lacked: respect, support, unconditional love, and sense of humor. Plus, he has beautiful hands and looks fabulous in or out of clothes. I pretty much won the man-lottery; I'd clone him for any lonely single gal, and he'd let me, probably!

Amusingly enough, the fundie was more a Beta than my husband, or is there a different letter for men who let their mothers, rather than their wives, run their lives?

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