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Maxwell Tidbits


Rosie

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I've often wondered if the Maxwell kids even know how to swim. And what's scary is that EVERYONE should know how to swim -- it's a life skill. But if the only experience they have ever had is wading, what should happen to one of them if their canoe tips over or something? Among other things, dresses aren't safe in the water -- they are wet and heavy and restrictive. There is a reason lifeguards are trained wearing jeans -- because they are being trained to save lives. But to put your daughters in water in frumpers is just stupid.

The posted once (a long time ago) that Teri taught the girls and Steve taught the boys at a neighbor's pool. Swimming is not a learn once activity. You've got to swim once in a while to remember. If they have swam in 10 years, then they're not going to remember more than the most basic "doggie paddle".

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The posted once (a long time ago) that Teri taught the girls and Steve taught the boys at a neighbor's pool. Swimming is not a learn once activity. You've got to swim once in a while to remember. If they have swam in 10 years, then they're not going to remember more than the most basic "doggie paddle".

I wonder if they wore swimsuits? Hm, I don't remember the post about the neighbor's pool, but when I saw them canoeing on "what some would call a vacation", I was concerned. Sure, they were wearing life jackets, but they were also in full frumper-combat gear.

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I'm reading the rest of this family's blog. They also have children named Hosanna, Moses, and Psalms - WTF?? It seem like their travel plans always include dropping in on a fundie family they hardly know so they can have a few free meals.

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I'm reading the rest of this family's blog. They also have children named Hosanna, Moses, and Psalms - WTF??

and Job I believe.

I can see Vision O'Yahweh coming next.

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Jacob and Jerusalem? Oh my. Wonder what there kids will be named? I'm also wondering how the Duggers missed Jerusalem as a name.

They couldn't decide to which gender it belonged. :mrgreen:

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I can see Vision O'Yahweh coming next.

Nah, Lina's got dibs on that one. Or Yahsome.

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also, distance is not measured in minutes.

That's actually quite common here in Canada...

I'd be surprised if I asked the distance between two cities and somebody said "300 kilometers" instead of "3 hours".

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Mary is wearing lipstick in the photo in the kitchen with Sarah and Anna. How did that get past Stevo? Is he maybe lightening up a little? He is allowing them to curl their hair, which I think would be an idol in only a short amount of time. Hmmm...

Steve-O better watch out... Mary will turn into a little lipstick wearing trollop who defrauds men.

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I don't actually think Mary is wearing lipstick, just probably has pinker lips and maybe is wearing chapstik. I am not even sure where she would get lipstick and seeing as how neither of her sisters in law wore it at their weddings, I am guessing she has never even seen it except on the elderly!

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I don't actually think Mary is wearing lipstick, just probably has pinker lips and maybe is wearing chapstik. I am not even sure where she would get lipstick and seeing as how neither of her sisters in law wore it at their weddings, I am guessing she has never even seen it except on the elderly!

Oh, true -- could be chapstick. Well, she'd better watch it with that and go for the more clear kind because she going to find herself defrauding the boys with her luscious lips.

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"Yes really, it IS this big. Would I lie to you?"

"And I've got this elaborate wrapping of it around a spool in order to fit it in my pants, but when it springs out straight, it's like a hose!".

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"Yes really, it IS this big. Would I lie to you?"

Of COURSE not!!! But then again, she has nothing to compare it to.

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I can see Vision O'Yahweh coming next.

Isn't one of the Wilkinson kids already called that? And they have a Jerusalem Song.

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You can tell that Jerusalem and Jacob are courting because of the ridiculous matching outfits. If they were married they'd have to kiss in every photograph. If they were just siblings, the boy would be too old to wear a home-made shirt to match his sisters. I think I've figured out the fundie code.

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The Maxwells are the most painful family I have ever encountered in real life, online, in the news, anywhere. They are miserable excuses for human beings.

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also, distance is not measured in minutes.

Unless it's angular minutes. Though that's an odd default for a website!

J'chelle still has a uterus -- there is still time!!!!

Nice to know I am not the only one who thought this!! :D

I'm reading the rest of this family's blog. They also have children named Hosanna, Moses, and Psalms - WTF?? It seem like their travel plans always include dropping in on a fundie family they hardly know so they can have a few free meals.

All I can say is, what, they have a kid named "Jerusalem" and one named "Job" but no Lindsey...

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I don't actually think Mary is wearing lipstick, just probably has pinker lips and maybe is wearing chapstik. I am not even sure where she would get lipstick and seeing as how neither of her sisters in law wore it at their weddings, I am guessing she has never even seen it except on the elderly!

And some kind soul among "the elderly" is probably where Mary got lipstick, if indeed she has any.

MARY: Good morning, ma'am. Our church services are starting soon. Would you like me to wheel you there?

EDNA: Oh, hello dear. My, my! (Checks to make sure they are alone except for poor old Rose in the next bed)... I remember you. You sure are looking pretty these days, you know that? I like what you've done with your hair. And I see you took care of the eyebrows like we talked about last time. Nothing to be ashamed of, dearie. You should see what mine looked like back in the day. But I know we only have a few minutes, so I wanted you to have this... (Hands her a lipstick.) It's brand new. My daughter-in-law sells Mary Kay.

MARY: Thank you, ma'am. But I can't--

EDNA: I want you to have it anyway, just in case. My daddy wouldn't let me wear makeup, either. But I'm so glad I did my face that night I sneaked off to the church social and met my sweet Ned. Married sixty years, we were. And someday you're going to meet someone, too. Lots of someones. Just like we talked about last time...

MARY (whispers): I hear Sarah coming.

EDNA: Well then, we'd better be off to church.

SARAH (enters room): Mary! I've been looking all over for you!

EDNA: She was just helping me get ready for church. Isn't that right, Mary?

MARY (smiles): Yes, ma'am!

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ooo good sluething!

We travelled a lot as kids, never do I remember having a daily briefing. But then there were only four of us, not eleventy billion.

Radon? What does that signify? Was he like the Richard Simmons of the Bible? And why can't the brothers and sisters exercise together? It's kind of disgusting to assume they will be defrauded by each other. Yuck.

Maybe it's more practical than that? Everyone has to rise and shower/get dressed, and there are a lot of Maxwells, and since males and females often concentrate on different sorts of exercises for different results, the men exercise while the women get ready for the day, and then shower while the girls exercise.

But while Steve is the king of practicality, it's probably for a way creepier reason than that.

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http://www.religionnewsblog.com/19977/the-pilgrims-papa-pilgrim

This is the Buckingham Hale family visiting the Maxwells.

Sounds like the Hales (nee Pilgrims) were even more austere And father centric than Steve, before it all went terribly, terribly wrong.

That's just too fucked up for words. That man makes Steve look like the best Dad in the world. Good on the Buckinghams for taking on all those kids who must have some serious issues with trust and love. I can't imagine how hard it would be for any of them. Poor poor kids.

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