"...So their marriage bed would indeed be sacred."

[RR88]

Does Lori's daughter know that her mom wrote about the state of her vagina?

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2011/02/wedding-was-perfect.html

[Kitten]

Hey, on their honeymoon, they are "Having a blast swimming, hiking, and getting to know each other better..."

Because that's what I want to do on a honeymoon - get to know the person I'm already married to for all eternity better. Hope I don't learn anything I don't like...Oops! Too late!

[NurseNell]

Does Lori's daughter know that her mom wrote about the state of her vagina?

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2011/02/wedding-was-perfect.html

The gown was defrauding, definitely not a fundie one. :oops:

[Seven Severn]

That was not a modest wedding dress. How could she let that happen? :naughty:

[Glass Cowcatcher]

Honk if you read that post and heard the guy officiating the marriage in The Princess Bride.

[emmyfair]

My marriage bed was not sacred by fundie standards, but if my mother had posted this, I would have died of mortification. I don't think it's anyones business if a "marriage bed is sacred" or not, and it's really not a subject for a mother to write about a daughter for the whole freaking world to see.

Fundies = major boundary issues

[NurseNell]

My marriage bed was not sacred by fundie standards, but if my mother had posted this, I would have died of mortification. I don't think it's anyones business if a "marriage bed is sacred" or not, and it's really not a subject for a mother to write about a daughter for the whole freaking world to see.

Fundies = major boundary issues

No kidding. What an invasion of privacy.

[Glass Cowcatcher]

My marriage bed was not sacred by fundie standards, but if my mother had posted this, I would have died of mortification. I don't think it's anyones business if a "marriage bed is sacred" or not, and it's really not a subject for a mother to write about a daughter for the whole freaking world to see.

Fundies = major boundary issues

I don't follow this blog enough to know if it is specific to this couple, but I think a lot of fundy newlyweds wouldn't see this as an invasion of privacy at all, they'd be proud to have it known there was no hanky panky until they tied the knot. :roll:

[fluttershies]

Wow, if it wasn't for the wtf-ery of the commentary you'd never know it was a fundie wedding. The bride and groom and wedding party all look really nice even by non-fundie standards.

[holothuroidea]

Oh I feel so bad for her (she was beautiful, BTW, I'm glad she wasn't covered up fundie-style). Maybe she is proud of waiting, but still...

My MIL insisted stuff like this about us when we got married. Saying how we "did it the right way" and stuff. Which was totally not true, by the way. I mean waaaaayyy not true. She insisted, though, and I wasn't going to argue. I felt like smacking her, but I had thankfully unconditioned that reflex at that point. She also made rather unsavory comments about me when I was pregnant. It was incredibly embarrassing but she thought she was being clever. :(

Really, boundaries... respect them.

Anyway, about 50% of the time I read a blog referred to on this forum I get a creeper stomachache. That Jon character gives me the willies. I think they need to start selling special Creeper-Pepto so I can keep a bottle handy while I hang around FJ.

[fundiefan]

If my mother's most notable comments about my wedding were about my virginity, I'd be mortified. Fortunately, my mom ignores my vagina and has done so since I started seeing a doctor whose job it is to know about it, around the age of 15 or so.

Then again, I lived with the ex for almost two years before we got married so I'm pretty sure everyone knew the state of my vagina on my wedding day. I'm also pretty sure no one cares to consider it or give it any thought whatsoever.

[emmiedahl]

Lori has no way of knowing what her daughter did before marriage and even less chance of knowing what her son-in-law did. How many parents think their unmarried children are virgins? How many are wrong? Probably most of them!

[holothuroidea]

Ugh I don't know how I missed this the first time I read it...

... the Lord's perfect will for marriage which exemplifies Christ and the Church and how our society (and all previous societies) have messed it up.

I... really?.. I mean... what?...

...what!?

[xDreamerx]

I didn't see a remark on virginity? Unless the above was supposed to be it, but I read that line as more of a 'the threats to traditional marriage' crap.

[dawbs]

I didn't see a remark on virginity? Unless the above was supposed to be it, but I read that line as more of a 'the threats to traditional marriage' crap.

this:

They stood in front of us in purity, saving themselves for each other so their marriage bed would indeed be sacred. God's ways are so good!

(I had what most fundies would consider a 'pure and sacred marriage bed' and I forbade anyone to talk about it at my wedding...because that was private. It was between me and God and my husband)

[Mela99]

I still say that going from not even hugging full on to having to submit to your husband sexually in the same stay scares the ever living crap out of me.

And let's be honest here - the first couple times a girl has sex -- it's a completely 'meh' experience. It hurts, can be uncomfortable, and lasts about thirty seconds if the guy is a virgin. It takes a while. And with an inexperienced fundie hubby, I'm willing to bet she's going to spend her life orgasm-less. Which is how I assume most fundie women live.

Makes me sad that they have to revel in the worst parts of being a woman, and never get to enjoy one of the greatest.

[pimpom]

They stood in front of us in purity, saving themselves for each other so their marriage bed would indeed be sacred. God's ways are so good!

Really, think about it. How much more Pagan could one sound! It's all very fertility-rites-of-spring Marion Zimmerman Bradley - like. Eat that fundies!

[holothuroidea]

I still say that going from not even hugging full on to having to submit to your husband sexually in the same stay scares the ever living crap out of me.

I don't know if they are expected to consummate the marriage on the wedding night.

I know a few couples who waited for religious reasons and they all took the beginning of their marriages very slow. They were not fundies, though.

I think that the cruelest part about waiting until your married to have sex is the decade of complete and utter sexual frustration that precedes it (if you are lucky enough to get married in your early twenties).

I think if you CHOOSE that lifestyle because you believe it is a test of your strength, good for you. But the amount of pressure that fundies put on girls to be virgins until they are married constitutes coercion in my eyes and I think it is akin to abuse. It's like forcing someone to be on a diet of rice and lettuce for 10 years, or keeping them indoors or something, through coercion and manipulation. It's inhumane.

[dairyfreelife]

this:

They stood in front of us in purity, saving themselves for each other so their marriage bed would indeed be sacred. God's ways are so good!

(I had what most fundies would consider a 'pure and sacred marriage bed' and I forbade anyone to talk about it at my wedding...because that was private. It was between me and God and my husband)

Agreed. I would be mortified if my mother's comments were on the status of my vagina on my wedding day. No need to discuss that at all.

[holothuroidea]

Really, think about it. How much more Pagan could one sound! It's all very fertility-rites-of-spring Marion Zimmerman Bradley - like. Eat that fundies!

:lol:

I love how they assign divinity to inanimate objects like that. Although I think, the way they use the term, "marriage bed" is a euphemism.

[holothuroidea]

Oh I love how she uses her daughters wedding as a platform to preach about the evils of non-traditional marriages.

I wonder if she'll ever look back and regret not remembering one of the most important days in her daughter's life because she was too busy finding opportunities to minister.

[Mela99]

Looked at the blog... this is an awfully mainstream wedding for a fundie. Dancing? Music? Alcohol? Dresses that don't look like tshirts? A GIRL WEARING SNOWPANTS? ::faints dead away::

[fundifugee]

Oh my, this wedding would not have been such a glowing success in my family...not only the defrauding dress, but they also had teh ebil dancing! And secular music!!

[BelieveinScience]

I don't know if they are expected to consummate the marriage on the wedding night.

I know a few couples who waited for religious reasons and they all took the beginning of their marriages very slow. They were not fundies, though.

I think that the cruelest part about waiting until your married to have sex is the decade of complete and utter sexual frustration that precedes it (if you are lucky enough to get married in your early twenties).

I think if you CHOOSE that lifestyle because you believe it is a test of your strength, good for you. But the amount of pressure that fundies put on girls to be virgins until they are married constitutes coercion in my eyes and I think it is akin to abuse. It's like forcing someone to be on a diet of rice and lettuce for 10 years, or keeping them indoors or something, through coercion and manipulation. It's inhumane.

Is that really common? I'm a virgin and in my early 20s and I can never remember being "sexually frustrated."

[holothuroidea]

Is that really common? I'm a virgin and in my early 20s and I can never remember being "sexually frustrated."

I think it is highly individual. It would have been complete torture for me, but I do not know if that is common.

My point, though, is that these blanket prescriptions for sexuality are unfair at best and abusive at worst. I do think that forcing girls through coercion to wait until they are married is cruel. Even if there are many who are fine with it, some individuals will suffer. Maybe it's not a great amount of suffering, but it is unnecessary suffering.