Fundies being jealous of dead people

[Daenerys]

I find this so freaking creepy and can't quite believe that it is A Thing.

The Seven Sisters' friend Meredith died last week. I'm glad that her suffering is finally over, but what Jessica says is just disturbing:

I feel like this is very chopped up…and I’m not saying all that I really want to say. She was a dear…and we’re going to miss her! When I think of where she is right now and what she is seeing and hearing and feeling, oh my! I’m jealous!

Some day the silver cord will break

And I no more as now shall sing;

But oh the joy when I shall wake

Within the palace of the King!

Your life has to be pretty sad to want to be dead, even if you do believe in God and heaven.

[darkplumaged]

It's totally a thing. The Seven Sisters seem to talk about it more often than most fundies, but Jean Marie, a SAHD who writes the blog Sweet Life Under the Savior, is constantly writing about dead relatives and friends and how much she wishes she were in heaven (check out her most recent post).

I don't get it.

[Anise]

The seventy virgins also come in male. ;)

[ladypuglover]

The reason being as they are taught that everything is perfect in heaven. No pain, heartache, hunger and so forth. Also there are palaces and beautiful fields and it is always sunny and perfect. There you get to be with loved ones who have passed away and enjoy the perfectness together.

[browngrl]

this envy of the dead confuses me

if being dead is so awesome why are they so opposed to euthanasia or abortion - wouldn't that be a quick trip to Jesus's doorstep?

[doggie]

it is nothing new this fool proves it.

[fluttershies]

She was a dear…and we’re going to miss her!

They make it sound like she just moved away, not die in pain from a horrible illness because her parents refused her pain relief.

[QAF_Rocks]

this envy of the dead confuses me

if being dead is so awesome why are they so opposed to euthanasia or abortion - wouldn't that be a quick trip to Jesus's doorstep?

It's kind of like the NRA: "People can't kill people, only God can kill people."

[meow139]

his really worries me, poor girl.

[terranova]

I know the believe in heaven is not limited to fundies, but surely it says something about their lives that they're rather be dead than living them?

[darkplumaged]

I know the believe in heaven is not limited to fundies, but surely it says something about their lives that they're rather be dead than living them?

Yeah, and it's particularly interesting that these very young women are the ones hyperventilating about how AWESOME!!!11!! heaven will be. They have barely even lived yet: they've never gone to school, had jobs, been in love, lived away from home, gotten married, had children... and they're fantasizing about the afterlife? I have done all of those things but have kids, and I am far, far from being ready to go. But I actually have goals and plans, unlike the typical SAHD.

Perhaps floating around in heaven does seem totally great compared with waiting for Prince Fundie, but they'd never outright acknowledge, and probably don't even consciously realize, any of the shortcomings of their lifestyle. Whatever ennui and fear they feel, then, comes out as longing for heaven.

[Conuly]

Well, it makes sense. Real life is supposed to be just the opening act, preparation for the big eternal reward, which is supposed to be OH SO COOL.

Mind, most people's conceptions of Heaven sound stultifying and tedious to me, but I don't think there is any such place anyway.

[terranova]

Yeah harps and cream cheese...meh.

[moreorlessnu]

Well, it makes sense. Real life is supposed to be just the opening act, preparation for the big eternal reward, which is supposed to be OH SO COOL.

True. Everyone goes through bad times, but when you think about what people who are 15, 18, 22, 27, etc., have going on in their lives, and the things they are looking forward to, I don't know how many would chose heaven right now over those things.

It's so sad how dreary and mundane the Seven Sisters' lives must be. They must know they'll never leave that house, or they would at least be dreaming of having their own homes, a husband, kids, etc.

[Rachel333]

Yep, it's a thing. A lot of people in my family are like that. My aunt often posts about how she can't wait until the rapture, which apparently will be happening any day now.

These sentiments really upset me. For one thing, when I was very depressed and suicidal and talked about how I just wanted my life to be over, all I got in response was "Oh, me too. As Christians we're all just waiting to go to heaven. Isn't it going to be great?" And honestly, even though things are great now, I'm still mad that no one ever noticed how bad I was doing because it's normal for Christians to talk like that.

[Beeks]

Do all fundies believe suicide = automatic hell? I know it's a catholic thing but what about our fundies? If not, and if heaven is so super awesome, why not just go there ASAP? Serious question

[Letgo]

Do all fundies believe suicide = automatic hell? I know it's a catholic thing but what about our fundies? If not, and if heaven is so super awesome, why not just go there ASAP? Serious question

No, they should not believe that suicide is a straight shot to hell. Belief in Jesus as the Savior brings salvation. Even if there is a suicide or some other terrible act. But we cannot just decide we want to kill ourselves and go to heaven because it is God's decision when we go, not ours. (That is also why euthanasia is wrong.) Man should not make decisions like that and we need to leave that to God. At least, the above is what mainstream Christianity believes. I would think most fundies would believe that. However, I have seen and heard lots of fire and brimstone type teachings about people going to hell for being gay, having sex, rebelling and leaving the patriarchal umbrella of protection, and so on. I have never been able to figure out how we are offered salvation through the grace of God but certain "sins" send us to hell. That type of teaching contradicts the message of love and foregiveness of Jesus.

[IceQueen]

I went to a borderline fundie school for a year and I freaked my parents out telling them how much fun it will be to go to heaven. I think I told my father he could have unlimited snacks and tv time when he's dead in heaven with Jeeebus!. That was one of the reasons we only spent a year at that school.

[nokidsmom]

I got exposed to the "going to heaven to be with Jesus would be so awesome" back when I was a teenager and spent a week at my church's denomination summer camp. This was not a fundy church but a mainline Protestant denomination. The pastor heading up the youth groups that week was on a "soul winning" mission and I was around a lot of teenagers that had jumped onto the salvation bandwagon and talked a lot about how great it would be to go to heaven, that they weren't afraid of death, that they died young it would be OK, etc. Even then, I could not understand how a bunch of young kids would think this was OK. I guess because maybe because I could see so much to look forward to and experience at that point in my life that I couldn't see wanting to check out already. Even to go that that "awesome" heaven.

[ems]

The reason being as they are taught that everything is perfect in heaven. No pain, heartache, hunger and so forth. Also there are palaces and beautiful fields and it is always sunny and perfect. There you get to be with loved ones who have passed away and enjoy the perfectness together.

It makes sense but is still rather disturbing. My liberal Christian self finds the focus on the afterlife in fundie Christianity to be disturbing for many reasons. I figure God put us in this world, right now, for a reason. I've also noticed that "the afterlife" is thrown around as an excuse for not having compassion for suffering in this world, for trashing the earth, etc. Mostly, the jealousy of the dead sits dangerously close to a suicide wish, and I wonder how many of these fundies struggle with depression.

[ems]

I find this so freaking creepy and can't quite believe that it is A Thing.

The Seven Sisters' friend Meredith died last week. I'm glad that her suffering is finally over, but what Jessica says is just disturbing:

Your life has to be pretty sad to want to be dead, even if you do believe in God and heaven.

When I read this, I also wonder if maybe she is grieving more deeply than she lets on but feels the need to "keep sweet" by focusing on how her friend is now in heaven, etc.

[hyperactress23]

In the SB church I grew up in, it wouldn't have been considered normal to be jealous of the dead. Sure, people would talk about how one day we'd all be in heaven and this would be over (not really the best comfort to a teenager going through stuff), but they'd always make sure to add in that we needed to live our lives to the fullest while we were here, and not spend them focusing on heaven. (Other than focusing on witnessing to others so we could see them in heaven one day too.)

As someone who's a lot more liberal of a Christian now, yes, heaven sounds great. I don't think it's all the "harps and cream cheese" stuff you see on TV, but I am someone big enough to say that I don't know what it's going to be like. I've been taught that it's a place of eternal rest and peace, but honestly a part of me thinks that sounds so boring, and I don't think God would send us to a place where we were eternally bored. I was also taught that we'd have our own mansions with everything we wanted in them, which, to me, sounded very materialistic, what with descriptions of how people would have pools or basketball courts or whatever in their mansions, and we were taught that being overly materialistic was a sin. If they were taught that, I could see them wanting to go somewhere where they would have more to do than just take care of babies, but I highly doubt that's how they're taught. Either way, the idea of being jealous of the dead or focusing on a desire to go to heaven strikes me as odd.

[Boltingmadonna]

I keep wondering if I should bring this up, because the blog author says that doctors have told her she will die within a year. I'm sure she's really suffering, so I hate to snark. But it really creeps me out. The site is

http://www.christianpost.com/news/dying-to-meet-him-anorexia-and-grace-72438/.

The author writes for something called "The Christian Post." Apparently she has been anorexic for so many years that her systems are failing, and she claims that doctors told her she could not recover. She's in home hospice.

It creeps me out because she seems to be very melodramatic about her illness, and rather than actually trying to get better, she has given up and spends all of her time talking about how great it will be when she dies and goes to be with Jesus. Apparently Jesus, who could in theory heal her, has let her (and her family!) suffer with her illness for years, and now gets some kind of voyeuristic pleasure out of watching her languish toward certain death. She never talks honestly about whether she's eating or trying to take nourishment. She has mentioned that she just isn't hungry any more and can't eat solid food. But then she mentions calling up a woman from church to get her to bring over a salad. It's mostly just Jesus, Jesus, Jesus all the time, with occasional references to having seizures and hoping she'll die soon. She said in one post that she sneaked a scale into her room (SIN!! Oh forgive me Jesus!) and found that she weighs 96 pounds just like always. I don't understand why everyone is catering to her death wish. Perhaps there are good reasons why her doctors and parents have given up on her and are just letting her die, but it makes me very uneasy. Her last post was the first one in which she has actually used the word "anorexia."

As I said, I don't want to snark on her. But I would be interested in what other FJers think about this. Can doctors really tell you that you're going to die for sure from anorexia, and therefore you don't need treatment any more?

[fluttershies]

Pretty sure that with anorexia there does come a point of no return, unfortunately. When your body is using up muscle to keep going, you can't really recover from that.