Michelle teaches us how to grieve

[2xx1xy1JD]

I don't even know if I believe there ever was a "Caleb". It has crossed my mind more than once that the oral-contraceptive-caused-miscarriage of "Caleb" was just a necessary invention of the whole Duggar narrative.

I believe it.

Guilt can be a powerful emotion. I know that I'm ordinarily calm, rational and logical, but I had some downright kooky reactions after my first miscarriage which were often based on irrational guilt. My weird shit included:

- eating everything in sight, because the OB had made an offhand remark that I was measuring "too small" just before the miscarriage was diagnosed (I mean, the rational part of me knew the difference between a fetus and fat, but small = dead baby got implanted in my crazed head)

- bursting into tears at a wedding when my MIL asked if I wanted to have a seat, when I was 2 mos. into my next preg., because I assumed that it meant that she was thinking that dancing would cause me to miscarry and was therefore blaming me for the first miscarriage.

- having a bit of a breakdown after the life insurance broker's assistant called shortly after what would have been my due date, to ask if we needed to change the beneficiary on the policy. When we abruptly told her that there was no baby, she was taken aback and started mumbling about "but I had it written in my notes". Again, in my crazed state, this was interpreted as "you failed to deliver a healthy baby as we expected you to do".

- I was fully prepared to go postal on any natural/New Age crap-peddlar who tried talk about mind-body connection in pregnancy, and nearly hurled "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom" across the bookstore for suggesting that multiple miscarriage may be linked to a woman being ambivalent about her role as a mother. [That part wasn't crazy - it's a horrible passage from a doctor passing off voodoo as medical evidence.]

Now, in that state of mind, if an OB had manipulated me by explicitly blaming me for the miscarriage, I would have had a mental breakdown and may have sworn off birth control for life. Now, I'm married to a doctor and have access to medical journals, so it's possible that I would have smelled the bullshit, but if I was in Arkansas and didn't have a strong science background and was used to simply accepting whatever a doctor said, I'd be screwed.

[Austin]

I believe it.

Guilt can be a powerful emotion. I know that I'm ordinarily calm, rational and logical, but I had some downright kooky reactions after my first miscarriage which were often based on irrational guilt. My weird shit included:

- eating everything in sight, because the OB had made an offhand remark that I was measuring "too small" just before the miscarriage was diagnosed (I mean, the rational part of me knew the difference between a fetus and fat, but small = dead baby got implanted in my crazed head)

- bursting into tears at a wedding when my MIL asked if I wanted to have a seat, when I was 2 mos. into my next preg., because I assumed that it meant that she was thinking that dancing would cause me to miscarry and was therefore blaming me for the first miscarriage.

- having a bit of a breakdown after the life insurance broker's assistant called shortly after what would have been my due date, to ask if we needed to change the beneficiary on the policy. When we abruptly told her that there was no baby, she was taken aback and started mumbling about "but I had it written in my notes". Again, in my crazed state, this was interpreted as "you failed to deliver a healthy baby as we expected you to do".

- I was fully prepared to go postal on any natural/New Age crap-peddlar who tried talk about mind-body connection in pregnancy, and nearly hurled "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom" across the bookstore for suggesting that multiple miscarriage may be linked to a woman being ambivalent about her role as a mother. [That part wasn't crazy - it's a horrible passage from a doctor passing off voodoo as medical evidence.]

Now, in that state of mind, if an OB had manipulated me by explicitly blaming me for the miscarriage, I would have had a mental breakdown and may have sworn off birth control for life. Now, I'm married to a doctor and have access to medical journals, so it's possible that I would have smelled the bullshit, but if I was in Arkansas and didn't have a strong science background and was used to simply accepting whatever a doctor said, I'd be screwed.

My opinion is based on the shadiness I perceive in general with these people, and is not based on personal histories of other peoples' miscarriages (including my own). I believe they would lie about anything in order to turn a buck and gain more fame.

[emmiedahl]

I don't even know if I believe there ever was a "Caleb". It has crossed my mind more than once that the oral-contraceptive-caused-miscarriage of "Caleb" was just a necessary invention of the whole Duggar narrative.

I don't really believe it either. First, doctors know that it is possible to get pregnant while on the pill, most of them have delivered a few bc failure babies themselves. No doctor would tell you it is impossible to get pregnant. Their story pings my bullshit meter right there.

Then, there is the fact that while bc pills can prevent implantation, they do not cause the miscarriage of an already-implanted fetus. The doctor seeing Michelle through this time (I assume) did not get his MD from CollegePlus and thus is aware of how the Pill works and that it would not cause a miscarriage.

[2xx1xy1JD]

I don't really believe it either. First, doctors know that it is possible to get pregnant while on the pill, most of them have delivered a few bc failure babies themselves. No doctor would tell you it is impossible to get pregnant. Their story pings my bullshit meter right there.

Then, there is the fact that while bc pills can prevent implantation, they do not cause the miscarriage of an already-implanted fetus. The doctor seeing Michelle through this time (I assume) did not get his MD from CollegePlus and thus is aware of how the Pill works and that it would not cause a miscarriage.

If the story is true as stated, then I do believe that the doctor was guilty of professional misconduct.

[Visionoyahweh]

If the story is true as stated, then I do believe that the doctor was guilty of professional misconduct.

I believe the doctor was Ed Wheat. Take a gander and some of the books hes written:

www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr_dp_sr_1?_ ... author=M.D. Ed Wheat

One of them is the dry, clinical sex book Josh got before the wedding.

[dawn9476]

She is in no place to tell people how to grieve when she most likely has not been allowed to grieve for her daughter properly.