"A Sea of BEAUTIFUL Confederate Flags.." Friends of Duggars

[BayLee_10]

Having lived both in the north and in the south, it's much easier to think of ourselves as not 'racist' when only 1% of the population where we now live is non-white. Here, the 'N' word is Negro, which I hadn't heard said since I was in Junior High, and I am 69 so it was a long, long time ago.

[Queen of Serpents]

I was exposed to anti-Catholic stuff the 3 years in AL but having grown up in western New York it didn't bother me. I was the only Catholic in my grade from K until graduation. The Catholic church in our town was a mission church. When we moved there the neighbors weren't allowed to play with us because we were Catholic. When we were little our playmates were the Amish kids. We had school prayer from K thru 10th grade, when the law changed. The day always began with the Protestant form of the Our Father. I asked a few times if we could say the Catholic form or Hail Mary, and was told no in no uncertain terms. As a senior I was not allowed to go to the baccalaureate ceremony. As a young child I lived in fear of the KKK because they had come to Rochester and lit a cross at Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen's residence.

The area was largely Free Methodist with some ordinary Methodists and Baptists. There was Roberts Wesleyan College and Houghton College, very conservative colleges, and some kids went down to Bob Jones University.

Had I grown up with lots of Catholics who knows if I'd be Catholic today. But because of the way I was treated because of my Catholicism I became very proud to be one.

Where was this in Rochester? I grew up in the Albany area (Amsterdam, NY- tons of Catholics) and then started going to Nazareth College, officially moved to Rochester area two years ago, so I'm still exploring the city and trying to learn more about the local history and politics.

Were Nazareth College and St. John Fisher not respected or influential- granted they're both in Pittsford, but I was wondering if they had any influence as two Catholic colleges. Though when I did food service on campus (graduated 2010) I had plenty of people ask me "what that shit" was or how "they couldn't take me seriously" in conversation when I had ashes on my forehead for Ash Wednesday. Were the Catholics kinda concentrated in different areas of Rochester?

[NurseNell]

Were Nazareth College and St. John Fisher not respected or influential- granted they're both in Pittsford, but I was wondering if they had any influence as two Catholic colleges. Though when I did food service on campus (graduated 2010) I had plenty of people ask me "what that shit" was or how "they couldn't take me seriously" in conversation when I had ashes on my forehead for Ash Wednesday. Were the Catholics kinda concentrated in different areas of Rochester?

I grew up in Chautauqua County. Jamestown and Dunkirk both had lots of Catholics but the rest of the county almost none. I only mentioned Rochester because that's where Archbishop Sheen lived. The colleges I mentioned were the ones a lot of my classmates chose. I went to D'Youville College in Buffalo, a Catholic women's college (now co-ed). I was the only one in my class who went to a Catholic college. Nazareth and St. John Fisher are well known too but they weren't on the radar for my Free Methodist and Baptist classmates. I grew up in the 50's, there are more Catholics now in the small towns of Chautauqua County but in the 50's were we a tiny minority.

[marmalade]

Today, I think most of the resentment comes from the way working class and poor Southerners are portrayed in the media/books/movies. We are portrayed as ass backwards, uneducated, stupid, ignorant, redneck hillbillies. And I have to say I agree with my fellow Southerners to an extent. It's almost biased in way. I mean do you see any other region of the country portrayed in a derogatory as often as the South is?

I think you have to look closer to home to observe where the bulk of the portrayals of the South come from. It's other Southerners. Capote, Harper Lee, Faulkner, Tennessee Williams, Tom Wolfe....that's just off the top of my head. They all merely wrote what they saw on a daily basis and no, it doesn't paint many Southerners in a postivie light. But that's what true critics of society do; a problem can't be fixed unless it's acknowledged. Too many Southerners STILL try to sweep the ugly parts of their past under the rug like they never existed.

[Terrie]

I lived in a small town in northern WI from 1980 to 1989. I only heard the n word once, directed to my then 2 y.o. Afro-Colombian son. My son thought the man called him a snickers. The man got a piece of my mind. I've lived in MN since I left WI and while I'm in a city the only people using the n word are African American teenagers and some young adults. I frequently visit small towns, I never hear the word. The bigger prejudice I see both in WI and MN is against Native Americans because of fishing rights.

Oh, Lordie, yes, the fishing rights. And it's only incidentally related to race. Fishing is Serious Business . Personally, my biggest beef with the South is people who expect me to sound like the movie Fargo. Um, no. I'm not nearly old enough to sound like that. That's my grandmother's accent, people.

[onlyorganic]

I've lived in the south, and having returned back north it's amazing to me how many completely educated people ask me WHY I'd ever live someplace "like that". When I ask these people if they've every been to ____,____ or ______ they say "No, but I would NEVER want to live there." Even in educated company, it's astounding how many people can't see the south past dueling bajos in "Deliverance".

[NurseNell]

I've lived in the south, and having returned back north it's amazing to me how many completely educated people ask me WHY I'd ever live someplace "like that". When I ask these people if they've every been to ____,____ or ______ they say "No, but I would NEVER want to live there." Even in educated company, it's astounding how many people can't see the south past dueling bajos in "Deliverance".

Speaking of dueling banjo's. :geek: When my daughter was 15 I found her birth family at her request. Her mother was deceased so it was the rest of her family we were getting to know. daughter's roots are very deep in dixie (AL,GA,SC). So we agreed to meet her uncle and his family at a TN location to go white water rafting on the Ocoee. This was something my daughter's mother enjoyed. They rented a cabin in the Smokeys, and we were to meet a woman in Cleveland, TN who would show us the way to the cabin. So I'm driving and my then 16 y.o. daughter and my 12 y.o. son are in the car. We follow this stranger we'd never met before 25 freaking miles along a dirt road to this cabin. After about 10 miles my kids are getting freaked, it's dark out too. Em says OMG, I think we are going to meet up with crazies playing dueling banjos. I'm not scared.....yet. But soon even I was thinking, damn, I need to turn around and head out of here. Never mind there was no way to turn around. I was really getting afraid and my kids were petrified. Well, the road finally ends and there is a beautiful cabin. The lady returns to Cleveland. We have to sleep there that night until Em's uncle and family show up the next morning. None of us slept well. But it was a beautiful site, the rafting was fun, and we all had a good time. Never did hear dueling banjos.

[roddma]

I am from the South and do not say the N word. I would be safe to say a majority of this region is not proud of their past. And what region does not have skeletons in their closet? Plenty of famous people from the South: Elvis, Tina Turner, Dolly Parton, Bill Clinton, Al Gore. Sarah Palin is as racist as they come. Michelle Bachman isn't the brightest bulb in the box. And don't get me started on Santorum. The uneducated and racists are spread far and near.

[Witsec7]

In Dec of 1969 my brother and I were driving south to Mayport FL, he was in Zumwalts Navy with a pony tail down his back and I was a hippy chick with crazy hair. We got stopped in a burg outside of Statesboro GA for 'speeding'. They tossed the VW van looking for dope, but we weren't dumb so they didn't find our stash. We got locked up to await a magistrate in the a.m.There wasn't a toilet in my cell and I had to pee. 'Cletus' brought me a bucket, and watched.I had some serious concerns based on what the cop was saying to me and didn't sleep a wink.

In the morning they hauled us both in cuffs to the 'courtroom'. The magistrate said he would have to fine us and asked us how much money we had and where we were going. My bro said he was on leave and taking me to visit Mayport and his ship and I was flying back north in 2 weeks. We had some money stashed in the van that they didn't find, so we told them we only had $200 on us. He made us hand over the $200. We never saw a citation or a receipt.

That was my first experience with southern hospitality.

[Guest Anonymous]

As for the N word (or any other racial slur for that matter)...it has never and will never come out of my mouth. Anyway, I think some of you are missing the point. The fact of the matter is, when buttons are pushed this is how Southerners will react. Whether you think it's racist is beside point. This is how it is. I don't condone this type of behavior, but I can understand where they're coming from.

To whom ever it was that said maybe if we didn't act like ignorant hillbillies, you remind me of how the Duggars act when they are outside of their own little bubble (turning up their noses at different cultures and ethnic food).

[Guest Anonymous]

In Dec of 1969 my brother and I were driving south to Mayport FL, he was in Zumwalts Navy with a pony tail down his back and I was a hippy chick with crazy hair. We got stopped in a burg outside of Statesboro GA for 'speeding'. They tossed the VW van looking for dope, but we weren't dumb so they didn't find our stash. We got locked up to await a magistrate in the a.m.There wasn't a toilet in my cell and I had to pee. 'Cletus' brought me a bucket, and watched.I had some serious concerns based on what the cop was saying to me and didn't sleep a wink.

In the morning they hauled us both in cuffs to the 'courtroom'. The magistrate said he would have to fine us and asked us how much money we had and where we were going. My bro said he was on leave and taking me to visit Mayport and his ship and I was flying back north in 2 weeks. We had some money stashed in the van that they didn't find, so we told them we only had $200 on us. He made us hand over the $200. We never saw a citation or a receipt.

That was my first experience with southern hospitality.

I'm sorry for what you had to go through. Things have changed a whole lot since then. What happened during the Civil Rights era is just as bad as what happened during the Civil War era.

[Guest Anonymous]

As for the N word (or any other racial slur for that matter)...it has never and will never come out of my mouth. Anyway, I think some of you are missing the point. The fact of the matter is, when buttons are pushed this is how Southerners will react. Whether you think it's racist is beside point. This is how it is. I don't condone this type of behavior, but I can understand where they're coming from.

To whom ever it was that said maybe if we didn't act like ignorant hillbillies, you remind me of how the Duggars act when they are outside of their own little bubble (turning up their noses at different cultures and ethnic food).

I'm telling you right freaking now that not all Southerners act that way, by a long shot. Maybe you need to find some new people to hang out with. Or move. Or stop making bullshit excuses for bullshit behavior.

And if you're talking about my comment in your second paragraph, WTF? You said that Southerners are portrayed negatively by the media, which causes them to have no choice but to act like damn fools. That's really insulting. A lot of us can control ourselves and have a sense of context and proportion. If I see the media portraying Southerners as ignorant or racist I think "well, that doesn't apply to me" and I go about my business. I don't run to my computer and order a dozen Confederate flags to hang from my windows in an attempt to stick it to the yankees or the Hollywood elitists or whoever it is that you think is out to shit on the entire land of Dixie.

I don't know if you really lack reading comprehension or if you're deliberately being obtuse but I suspect the latter. I'll quote my comment for reference, but seeing as I'm a member of the group/culture you're claiming I don't understand, the Duggar comparison is another load of crap. Maybe you could actually address the questions I raised, too.

Why in the world do you think that a negative media portrayal is an excuse or a license to wave around a flag that is so hurtful to other people? Not to mention that it doesn't make any sense. The media thinks we're ignorant and racist?!? Grrr, that makes us angry. We'll show them we're not like that - by acting even more ignorant and racist. How is that a winning strategy?

[formergothardite]

As for the N word (or any other racial slur for that matter)...it has never and will never come out of my mouth. Anyway, I think some of you are missing the point. The fact of the matter is, when buttons are pushed this is how Southerners will react. Whether you think it's racist is beside point. This is how it is. I don't condone this type of behavior, but I can understand where they're coming from.

To whom ever it was that said maybe if we didn't act like ignorant hillbillies, you remind me of how the Duggars act when they are outside of their own little bubble (turning up their noses at different cultures and ethnic food).

Um, I'm born and raised in the South, love it here, but I don't know many people who would act like that and if anyone I did know did react that way I would call them out as being racist, not justify it and say that I understood where they were coming from in acting in a racist way.

[debrand]

As for the N word (or any other racial slur for that matter)...it has never and will never come out of my mouth. Anyway, I think some of you are missing the point. The fact of the matter is, when buttons are pushed this is how Southerners will react. Whether you think it's racist is beside point. This is how it is. I don't condone this type of behavior, but I can understand where they're coming from.

To whom ever it was that said maybe if we didn't act like ignorant hillbillies, you remind me of how the Duggars act when they are outside of their own little bubble (turning up their noses at different cultures and ethnic food).

Wait. What?

No, I'm southern and I do not make racist comments. The confederate flag is a flag of traitors and slave holders. I see no honor in flying it. It shouldn't be seen as any different than a Taliban flag.

[slickcat79]

You said that Southerners are portrayed negatively by the media, which causes them to have no choice but to act like damn fools. That's really insulting. A lot of us can control ourselves and have a sense of context and proportion. If I see the media portraying Southerners as ignorant or racist I think "well, that doesn't apply to me" and I go about my business. I don't run to my computer and order a dozen Confederate flags to hang from my windows in an attempt to stick it to the yankees or the Hollywood elitists or whoever it is that you think is out to shit on the entire land of Dixie.

Yeah, that. I was born in the south and I've lived here my whole life. Many people in my dad's family are as racist and ignorant as they come, though I see that changing somewhat in younger generations. I can see the portrayal of "southerners" in the media, realize that there are people who are like that but it doesn't reflect everyone, and know that it's up to me to set the tone of my own behavior.

As far as the negative portrayal of different groups...I would sure as hell hate to be of Italian descent, living in the NJ area :shock: I would probably feel the need to run far, far away given the guido stereotype.

[dairyfreelife]

My husband and I were talking about this the other day. We both realized a few years ago that we had an irrational bias against southern accents and have been working hard to fight our biases.

Quoted before catching my mistakes-should say get out more and should say in, not on the civil war. My bad. :oops:

Definitely agree though that there are biases toward certain accents in the south. Tends to be associated with poor education, even though it's not necessarily true. I too have a mostly American "regionless" accent growing up around a city, but I have noticed when I had to record my voice that I have a little, slight southern accent to some of my words at times. There are backward crazies here in the south, but there are backward nutjobs everywhere. Even if you are portrayed negatively by association of your location, making yourself proud of being portrayed that way by showing off your racism pride isn't going to help anyone see your image in a better light.

[mirele]

I used the N-word once in my life in front of my mother. Shortly thereafter, I was sitting in the kitchen with a bar of yellow Dial soap clamped between my teeth. If there was one thing my parents (father from Oklahoma, mother's parents from Oklahoma) were pretty insistent about, it was that racism was not going to be tolerated in their home.

When we moved from California to Texas in 1973, my mom REALLY didn't want to go, because she'd heard bad things about the racism. Yeah, there was some. But my dad will tell you, from living in Oklahoma, California, Texas, Virginia and Illinois in his life, the racism was worst in the Chicago suburbs. *Wait, what?* As dad explained it, it was worse because people there were covert about their racism, unlike Southern states, where the racists were just so out and open about it--Confederate flags and so on.

These days, I'm such a lucky person to live in Maricopa County, Arizona, where we have a whole slew of white people who get off on hating brown people. It's not African Americans here, I've heard similar rhetoric about "those d*mn Mess'cans," even though the Mexicans (illegal or not) work in the hot sun all day long for peanuts. Some of our proud white politicians (I'm looking at you, Russell Pearce) would melt away if you had to do a hard day's work.

I am sure I have my blind spots and if pointed out, I'll try to rectify them. But I won't say the N-word, because I can still taste that soap over 40 years later.

[Guest Anonymous]

Again you are misunderstanding what I'm saying. I can understand why Southerners get upset over the way we are portrayed in the media. However, I don't condone the actions they take in response. I also never said all Southerners act this way, and I don't claim those that do as friends. I have never flown a Confederate flag, and have never, ever uttered a racial slur of any kind. Both are racist to say the least. Anyway, I was just giving an explanation about Southern resentment.

Lissar, I never said they have no choice, all I said was this is how they react. As I stated above I don't condone the behavior, I never said it was the right way to act, and I'm not excusing it. I was simply giving an explanation to Southern resentment. I do agree that acting in such a manner is racist and ignorant, and it needs to change. As for the Duggar comment, I have witnessed people act that way (turning up their noses at something different), especially at restaurants or gas stations along interstate exits. Granted that doesn't happen a lot, but it does happen.

[Hane]

NurseNell, I have relatives in Jamestown, NY. One family had a cross burned on their front lawn (during the Depression, I believe), so many of them Anglicized their Italian surnames.

A colleague had the following experience with Southern hospitality: she was part of a Connecticut contingent on a business trip to AT&T headquarters in Texas. A senior VP asked, "Do y'all know the difference between Yankees and Damn-Yankees? Yankees LEAVE.". She and her group sat there gobsmacked.

On a visit to South Carolina, a close friend bought some furniture to ship home to New Haven, and the store-owner treated her to the same charming witticism. I am amazed my friend didn't cancel her order and storm out.

I can't conceive of someone being so rude in a professional setting.

[Guest Anonymous]

Again you are misunderstanding what I'm saying. I can understand why Southerners get upset over the way we are portrayed in the media. However, I don't condone the actions they take in response. I also never said all Southerners act this way, and I don't claim those that do as friends. I have never flown a Confederate flag, and have never, ever uttered a racial slur of any kind. Both are racist to say the least. Anyway, I was just giving an explanation about Southern resentment.

Lissar, I never said they have no choice, all I said was this is how they react. As I stated above I don't condone the behavior, I never said it was the right way to act, and I'm not excusing it. I was simply giving an explanation to Southern resentment. I do agree that acting in such a manner is racist and ignorant, and it needs to change. As for the Duggar comment, I have witnessed people act that way (turning up their noses at something different), especially at restaurants or gas stations along interstate exits. Granted that doesn't happen a lot, but it does happen.

If a large number of people are constantly misunderstanding what you're saying, perhaps the solution is for you to communicate your thoughts more clearly.

Or maybe you say something, get called out on it because people think it's wrong and/or offensive, and then attempt to backpeddle away from it, even though you meant what you said initially.

[kb2]

It's hard to say which part of the country is more racist. I'm from Louisiana, which brought forth David Duke (you're welcome), but when I visited Pittsburgh this year a cab driver got excited when he heard where I was from and told me, "I really like what that David Duke guy is doing." And then he got really offensive about Katrina. And since I was up there for a job interview, I asked someone where they lived (because I wanted to know where I could possibly find housing) and they described their area with, "It's a white neighborhood." I felt like I'd never been around more openly racist people, but I was only there for a half-week, so maybe I just had an unusual Pittsburgh experience.

It may be that I label racist Louisianians as "crazy" but racist Pittsburghians as "Pittsburghian."

[Guest Anonymous]

If a large number of people are constantly misunderstanding what you're saying, perhaps the solution is for you to communicate your thoughts more clearly.

That, or maybe I'm not the only one with a reading comprehension problem. I think I stated many times on this thread that I don't condone the behavior. How many times do you have to read that before you understand it.

[Sunnichick31]

To be fair, blowing things up is a lot of fun if done safely. No one would say the Mythbusters people re fucked up for enjoying a good explosion. Of course safety is vital, and not blowing up stuff that isn't yours.

Off topic, but have you seen the youtube series Is It A Good Idea to Microwave This??? Basically it's a bunch of dumb guys putting various things into microwaves. FYI, microwave + silly string, not as funny as you'd think. Microwave + fireworks is, though.

[JesusFightClub]

Off topic, but have you seen the youtube series Is It A Good Idea to Microwave This??? Basically it's a bunch of dumb guys putting various things into microwaves. FYI, microwave + silly string, not as funny as you'd think. Microwave + fireworks is, though.

OH FUCK I AM NOW GOING TO WATCH THIS. I have a terrible weakness for watching explosions. There is obviously a 12 year old boy secretly lurking in my head.

[PBrooke]

Back when I was in college, some boys I knew microwaved CDs. I think it ultimately fried the microwave somehow.