Another Wonderful Modesty Post

[justlurking]

In this woman's 13, overblown thoughts on modesty she somehow fails to notice a common denominator...her husband.

www.visionarywomanhood.com/thirteen-modesty-thoughts/

Frankly, it appears to me that her husband has some serious issues with female sexuality that he should probably be get counseling for. If he's noticing, and becoming "bothered" by all these things that the average person isn't paying attention to, then he's clearly the one that should be changing his outlook--not everyone else.

I did LOL at the story she told of the woman in her AWANA group, who she tried to guilt into a "modesty revival" by crying about how her husband and son were defrauded by one shirt she chose to wear. The woman responded that her husband had a problem, but apparently that fact went straight over the author's head.

[emmiedahl]

Her husband seems to have a real problem. And he noticed that a small child's top is too tight? His own daughter? Yikes, the guy is a pervert.

[Arielkay]

Oh yeah, she says it herself

Unfortunately, she seemed to think it was my husband’s problem.

Um, yeah, cause it WAS. The lady's husband is clearly obsessed with other women's bodies. Creepy.

[Three and Done]

Her husband has a problem, period.

He reminds me of an ex of mine, who turned out to be a sex addict (but at least he didn't blame it on the women!).

[Aurora]

It's v-e-r-s-u-s not v-e-r-s-e-s.

[Dinaberries]

Her husband sounds like a complete asshole, and this woman is a nutjob. She cried when she talked to the woman from AWANA? If my husband said the types of things her husband said, I would be PISSED and if it happened often, I would seriously start thinking about divorce (especially the bit about saying she was sitting in an "inviting" manner). What a controlling, misogynistic asshole. Why is it that these fundie men are so much more sexually obsessed than the average man? If "guarding" my son from female flesh would make him grow up like that, I say bring on the cleavage!

And I think it's so sad that their children are taught from a young age to be ashamed of their bodies. There is nothing sexual about a child's body, and if someone thinks that there is anything indecent about child's body, they obviously have very serious issues.

[socalrules]

I think hubby is getting off on telling her about all the women that are not "modest". She is too blinded by his "Godliness" to realize he is the one being overly sexual. Who wants to bet this guy is arrested in the next few years for a sex crime? Hell, I will put money on his having a woman or two on the side.

[doggie]

The husband is a real asshole but hey he is perfect and should run everyone's life. She seems clueless the way she acts so he has to fix her. What is there a "chaste" book for dummy fundies that fundies read?

[Guest Anonymous]

The husband is a real asshole but hey he is perfect and should run everyone's life. She seems clueless the way she acts so he has to fix her. What is there a "chaste" book for dummy fundies that fundies read?

By sheer coincidence it's called "Modesty For Dummies"

[Third]

I saw a Pearls of Wisdom video - two Pearls young women talking about how you have to be modest even wearing a jacket if it's 103 and if you travel alone internationally to dress down - baggy sweats. Apparently kidnappers won't traffic modest girls.

[Conuly]

Frustration enveloped me; but nothing compared to when on the ride home my husband sarcastically stated, “Sure was nice looking at her boobs all night.†Righteous anger flooded me. That’s my husband and my son she is affecting!

Whatever happened to the much-touted "chivalry"? Or even just plain good manners? If a member of your community makes a faux pas, you might pull them aside and tell them about it nicely, but where is the class and taste in insulting them behind their backs like that? (I acknowledge that this might be a little hypocritical, but I think my point is still valid.)

Girls aren’t as visually stimulated by boys,

Sometimes you wonder if these people were ever teenaged girls. Maybe they were very, very, very, VERY repressed even then?

[doggie]

By sheer coincidence it's called "Modesty For Dummies"

God ask and you will be answered :mrgreen: I should have kept my mouth shut.

[doggie]

Sometimes you wonder if these people were ever teenaged girls. Maybe they were very, very, very, VERY repressed even then?

Makes me wonder why male strip clubs exist? woman are far more raunchy in them then men at female strip clubs.

[justlurking]

I definitely got the vibe that her husband's some kind of misogynistic perv. Not only is he paying too much attention to women in a really creepy way, but he's also degrading in his sarcasm about the behaviors that are offending him ("Sure was nice looking at her boobs..."). Instead of taking full ownership of the fact that he's the one with a "lust issue" he instead chooses to degrade innocent women who have no awareness that they are doing anything wrong. I could definitely see him being the type of person that regularly engages in "slut shaming".

[Koala]

Her husband is disgusting. If my husband said some stupid shit like that, he wouldn't have to wait long for the divorce papers. Truly, that was just creepy.

And her? If she had come to me crying like that, a "modesty revival" would have been the least of her concerns because I would have told her flat out to get the hell over it. Then I would have laughed in her face. :roll:

[MadameX]

You know, I never paid much attention in church the few years I had to go to a Christian school because where we lived the public ones were terrible, but that bible quote on the top of the blog post seems grossly misinterpreted if they think it's talking about dressing provocatively or in a sexually beguiling way.

I Tim. 2: 9-10 “I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.

Isn't this saying that women who worship God should be good people through their actions, which should speak louder than their worldly wealth? I am asking in earnest, I don't study the bible. The "dress" verb is used metaphorically, no?

Subtlety and nuance seems lost on fundies...

[bellamonster04]

"Frustration enveloped me; but nothing compared to when on the ride home my husband sarcastically stated, “Sure was nice looking at her boobs all night.†Righteous anger flooded me."

"Sarcastic" huh? Her husband will not stop staring at strangers breasts whether they are covered or not and gets off on telling his wife about it. His wife thinks that the solution to this problem is for every woman on earth to wear clothing that will make them appear to have no breasts. Interesting....

Too bad there isn't a simpler solution like the husband not mentally undressing every woman he comes across.

And I have a feeling that the woman did not change her style of clothing to "protect" her grown-ass husband and child. It was probably to keep from upsetting the mentally ill woman who cried over the shirts she chose to wear.

[Maude]

The author quotes 1 Timothy, but then uses Titus 2 as her litmus test for 'modest' dress...colour me confused. As MadameX pointed out, my understanding is that 1 Timothy has nothing to do with sexuality, as the author's tirade implies, but parading about one's riches and status. There's just so much that's wrong with this post, it makes my brain hurt. Fundie men are so sexually repressed that every little thing gets them off. They're creating a generation of perverts, to use one of Zsuzsa's favourite words. :?

[JesusFightClub]

Yeah, who forced hubby to look at a woman's boobs all night? Did he lose the ability to look at other stuff? Or to respectfully make eye contact and discuss AWANA? Are breasts so magical for fundie men that noticing a woman possesses a pair wipes out all other thoughts from their minds? We call this "repression".

Also strange was "modesty for children". If one finds oneself having lustful thoughts at the sight of a child's bum, that's not normal. I am not judging (if the person hasn't acted on them), we all have our struggles, but they need to see a good, helpful doctor ASAP. The answer isn't to make small children wear skirts over swimsuits but to have proper help and support for people who battle with that wrong desire.

[CanadianHippie]

Good lord, these women are not grabbing her hubby's head and shoving his face between their tatas! He is fully capable of not looking! For fucks sake, I have met hormonal 16 year old boys who can avoid looking at an "immodestly" dressed female when the situation doesn't warrant it. The difference between those boys and this woman's husband, is those boys know it's their own responsibility to not look; not the woman's responsibility to cover up.

[AnnieC 305]

I posted a comment pointing that out, but I'll be surprised if she posts it. But then I also posted it on my blog.

It made me think of this:

freethoughtblogs.com/lovejoyfeminism/2012/02/29/who-are-the-real-babies-house-proofing-and-modesty/

[synchroswimr]

Good lord, these women are not grabbing her hubby's head and shoving his face between their tatas! He is fully capable of not looking! For fucks sake, I have met hormonal 16 year old boys who can avoid looking at an "immodestly" dressed female when the situation doesn't warrant it. The difference between those boys and this woman's husband, is those boys know it's their own responsibility to not look; not the woman's responsibility to cover up.

QFT

[Dixiebelle]

'Chaste, not chased" WTF???

I would bet anything her headship is deep into porn. Y'know, so he can complain about how immodest it is and all.

[AudreyE]

Well, while all you immodest, bitter old sluts snark, I want to point out the clever thing she did with chaste/chased. Two words: brain trust.

Also, I *do* sometimes force her husband to look at my boobs at gun point, so... my bad. Sorry.

[snarkbillie]

I couldn't help but enjoy the comment about young ladies who have their self worth tied up in "being attractive" and how wrong that was. It's obviously better to have your self worth tied up in covering your nipples so men won't get hot when you're cold. Chaste not chased indeed.