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Joanne from "Narrow Is The Way" totally flips her shit


Koala

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Holy F dude! Is she bitter much? I'm guessing that she needs a little more "relationship" (if ya know what I'm sayin)!

Some sweet fellowship, perhaps?

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I'd rather be a monkey than admit I'm related to the asshat who sat in his dodge ram with the door ajar, periodically tapping the horn while recording a twatty song about how evolution is wrong.

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Wow. Sex-obsessed, much? She'd definitely consider me a whore and a degenerate, but I can guarantee I don't think about sex anywhere near as much as she does.

Also, she's got some crazy control issues around food. In one post, she described the way she got her kids to eat anything she served to them, like it or not--she just keeps re-heating and serving their leftovers at each meal and snack until they finally cave in and eat it, even if it means taking their leftovers to friends' houses. They don't get "new" food until they've finished their leftovers.

I can understand teaching kids to enjoy a variety of foods and not to be picky eaters, but her kids aren't allowed any food preferences at all.

As for who she's currently submitting to, her elder son is now 18, and thus an adult, and is the primary breadwinner in the family. So why isn't she living under his authority? He's her closest male relative who is "godly" enough by her standards; shouldn't she accept his authority?

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I am a religious Jew, but her form of atheism sounds amazing!

Good food, vacations, a degree from Yale? And all it takes is believing in evolution? Where do I sign up?

I wanna know where I went wrong! I'm an atheist and I DEMAND my good food, vacations and degree from Yale!

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As for who she's currently submitting to, her elder son is now 18, and thus an adult, and is the primary breadwinner in the family. So why isn't she living under his authority? He's her closest male relative who is "godly" enough by her standards; shouldn't she accept his authority?

I've got a feeling that everyone (save the nuts in that church she lives in) knows she's crazier than a shit house rat. As for her son, well I'd guess that since she he's still firmly under her control he won't be taking the reigns away from Miss Crazy Pants anytime soon:

fewtherebethatfindit.blogspot.com/2012/02/selective-service-conscientious.html

(in the comments she refers to him as a child and pretty much says he isn't allowed on the internet). :?

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ZOMG, my 6 yo GIRL is going to the birthday party of a BOY this weekend! Straight shot to hell. :?

She is one major whackadoo.

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Plus with her "My Story" post it proves that she's hypocritical. Then again I'm not shocked. :roll:

I know. The hypocrisy, it burnnnnnsssss.

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Oh, her church is big on the "street preaching".

Now it all makes sense:

earlychurchtruth.com/church_of_monett.html

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I don't understand these fundies sometimes. It takes most of them years to come to the life that they live, after living debaucherously (not a word) for most of their lives, and yet once they get to the fundydom, they turn around and judge everyone else behind them and assume no one could be on a similar path, seeking to be right with god like they did, etc. THEY'RE righteous now after living like heathens, but everyone else living like a heathen now is just bad.

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Anyone see the photo of the day-her church sign? THE BIBLE TEACHES: Bossy wives and women preachers are sin. 1 Cor 14 1 Tim 2 1 Pet 3 What a shitty church to believe those verses-especially Timothy (but they all suck).

I think they mean just 1 Cor 14:34-35: Women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission, as the law says. If they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church.

1 Tim 2: 11-15: A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner. But women will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith, love and holiness with propriety.

The author of Timothy was a lying sack of crap who pretended to be Paul, and Paul was a giant ass (in my opinion). They can both go fuck themselves as far as I'm concerned.

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I've been damned to hell since I was 6 and held the hand of the little boy who lived next door. Me thinks that hell is going to be a crowded place like the Olive Garden on a Friday night.

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I don't understand these fundies sometimes. It takes most of them years to come to the life that they live, after living debaucherously (not a word) for most of their lives, and yet once they get to the fundydom, they turn around and judge everyone else behind them and assume no one could be on a similar path, seeking to be right with god like they did, etc. THEY'RE righteous now after living like heathens, but everyone else living like a heathen now is just bad.

Kind of like former smokers who can't stand the smell of smoke.

That bit about the bugs in the flour - she should use the flour not moving to make batter for the deep frying the bugs, then add to the honey pot slop for protein.

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I've been damned to hell since I was 6 and held the hand of the little boy who lived next door. Me thinks that hell is going to be a crowded place like the Olive Garden on a Friday night.

I was kissed by my best friend (a boy!) when we were 3. Both of our moms thought it was adorable. Does that mean all four of us are doomed?

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I was kissed by my best friend (a boy!) when we were 3. Both of our moms thought it was adorable. Does that mean all four of us are doomed?

The boy whose hand I held might be okay. he found the way and he's got 6 or 7 kids now. He can just say I lead him astray.

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The boy whose hand I held might be okay. he found the way and he's got 6 or 7 kids now. He can just say I lead him astray.

You did lead him astray, you little tart. Mmmm tarts.

I've been Hell bound ever since the ripe age of 2 when my bestie Charlie and I ate worms together naked. It was ok because our moms made us get naked before letting us into the mud puddle. They even took pictures of us going to hell. :oops:

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The author of Timothy was a lying sack of crap who pretended to be Paul, and Paul was a giant ass (in my opinion). They can both go fuck themselves as far as I'm concerned.

+1,000,000

I don't know what percentage of the New Testament is actually forgery, but the latest I heard the figure was quite high.

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+1,000,000

I don't know what percentage of the New Testament is actually forgery, but the latest I heard the figure was quite high.

+ a couple more.

I still have faith, but when I try to explain to my fundie-lite people that I believe in the story of the gospels (as in, that they're not individually sacred, but together can be taken as a sacred story, and should be treated like any other historical text), and that I pretty much reject everything post-Acts, they FREAK OUT.

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I saw that :shock: That is some REALLY bad theology. Sounds like works-based salvation to me. No one can be perfect and she knows that, so I guess under her system everyone goes to hell. Now talking to people with y chromosomes is a sin so I guess I must really sin because sometimes I think they are *gasp* attractive! I feel bad for her daughters growing up in this extremely restrictive, unhealthy environment. Please girls, you can be Christians without all the crazy legalism.

I think she only has the one - Brianna, who is 16, and really super sheltered by her writings on the blog.

I agree, that is works based salvation, and she and her church do a lot of other weird extrabiblical stuff. For example, one woman on that blog posted she forced herself to eat things she didn't like (where's that in the Bible?) and they give away gifts. She's posted a few times that life isn't supposed to be entertaining or enjoyable.

Tied in with the "works" idea is the idea that it actually defiles a person to see "vile things" such as a naked woman. There's a funny story where Brianna is helping her brothers shift a mattress for a widowed woman and out falls...a porno mag!!!111!!! Brianna grabbed it and hid it in her coat before running away "visibly upset" to tell the widow. But luckily the boys didn't see it, so praise the Lord they were not defiled.

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Soo, did anyone figure out where to sign up for this awesome Yale-weed-vacation deal? I'm highly interested. (Minus the weed, blech).

Also, add me to the list of hell-bound since childhood. My first "boyfriend" and I held hands on the swings at recess. Sadly, that was the most damning action I got till the age of 19. :p Unless you count merely existing in the presence of males.

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So she divorced her second (?) husband, who sounded like an okay sort of guy in her "about me" thing, because according to the Lord she was still married to the first one?

Aaaaaaaand, she migrated to Monett, MO...why am I not surprised? That little corner of the world attracts some mighty interesting people (says the lady who lived there for 20+ years).

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I'm definitely hellbound. I slept over at my male friend's house all the time when we were children (we are exactly the same age) so I was always set on a bad path. Then I lived with guys for three years. I'm such a whore.

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