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The Official Fundie Encounters Thread


meow139

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I didn't see this anywhere else. So here, instead of spamming up the forums with our individual ones, this can be the thread we post our stories. To laugh at them, shake our heads at them, discuss them...

So, post away!

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I need to look through my paperwork. I had a conversation with a female door-to-door evangelist about why I was an atheist and mentioned the horrible anti-women crap in the Bible (rape victims being killed with their rapists or forced to marry them, pregnant women being sliced open and their babies' heads bashed against rocks, all the people in conquered countries being killed except for the virgins (who were the spoils of war/sex slaves/war brides)) as contributing to my losing faith in Christianity.

She left after a while but a few days later I received a letter with 4 hand-written pages of "explanation†for why that stuff isn’t as horrible as it seems (at least that’s what I think the letter was, I skimmed it and didn’t like what little I saw, so I just tossed it in a pile of paper somewhere)

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My step-grandma was a fundie, she scared the living crap out of me. She was the matriarch of the family, but everybody was scared of her. She was my first anti-feminist figure in life, while the first feminist figure was my mother.

Anyway, step-granny was the wicked witch of the west of fundamentalism; she forced me to go to prayer meetings with her friends when I was four, she took away all my favorite fairy tale books because they were 'unholy' and constantly pushed me into reading gory martyr stories, she would whack me in the ass with her cane every time I wasn't behaving in Church (the church she goes to, not my family's church).

She scared everyone in family, even my older siblings. When my sisters stopped wearing dresses and wore pants to school, she would go berserk and start preaching about Jezebel and whatever else she can use to rant against them.

I didn't encounter with a fundie, I lived with one.

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My step-grandma was a fundie, she scared the living crap out of me. She was the matriarch of the family, but everybody was scared of her. She was my first anti-feminist figure in life, while the first feminist figure was my mother.

Anyway, step-granny was the wicked witch of the west of fundamentalism; she forced me to go to prayer meetings with her friends when I was four, she took away all my favorite fairy tale books because they were 'unholy' and constantly pushed me into reading gory martyr stories, she would whack me in the ass with her cane every time I wasn't behaving in Church (the church she goes to, not my family's church).

She scared everyone in family, even my older siblings. When my sisters stopped wearing dresses and wore pants to school, she would go berserk and start preaching about Jezebel and whatever else she can use to rant against them.

I didn't encounter with a fundie, I lived with one.

that sounds..... Far beyond scary.

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I've never had a fundy experience :( no doubt because I live in England. Well, once I came across a chap in one of the parks in my town giving out creationist leaflets, but I don't think that alone would really count as fundy for most people on FJ.

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that sounds..... Far beyond scary.

Oh, I forgot one thing to mention; whenever I was in trouble, she would make sit still without scratching or moving, while she was reading her book. If I flinched, she would slap me. Maybe this is one of the causes of the Communication problems I have with people and with writing to people.

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I collect dolls, and used to belong to a message board that I now suspect had a huge fundy population. A huge portion of the population of the board is from Utah so I'm guessing fundy Mormons. This is their mission statement: "The mission of AGFMB is to provide a safe, respectful, positive, welcoming, and kind forum where American Girl doll fans can discuss dolls in an atmosphere of friendship and support." Basically, one of their rules was to keep sweet (stay "positive" and "friendly"). We were not allowed to post anything negative. My favorite with this was in regards to the generic modern dolls who might look like a doll who had a character prescribed by the company (like a modern doll who looked like Samantha). We were not allowed to refer to them as the doll who looked like Samantha, or "not!Samantha", because that doll had her own identity, and it hurt people's feelings (who had that doll) that we weren't acknowledging her identity. Had something negative going on in your life? Don't post details, because it might scare people. Disagree with someone? Don't post, because you are causing drama and hurting people's feelings. They had another rule, that we could only talk about religion within the context of the AG books. This rule included that you couldn't proselytize, but as with the books, you could post educational information. Well, guess what... most of the characters are Christian!! HMMMMMM. Someone got banned for posting a photo album of her doll who was Pagan, teaching about Pagan customs (which should have fit under the educational clause). Yet, you were allowed to post things like "Don't worry, the LORD will see you through" in response to people's personal threads. The implementation of this rule was clearly not biased at all! Shortly before I left, they had a debate over whether the peace sign (featured on a clothing item I think) was acceptable to sell because it might not be Christian. Yet, we weren't supposed to have religious discussions. It was great for the LOLZ but eventually I couldn't take it anymore. They also played favorites, and I got on the black list, so it wasn't even worth staying a member just to read (I tried to get banned but was unsuccessful, lol! All I got were nasty private messages!).

I had some good discussions with some of the other teens at the time, who were evangelical/some definitely fundy or fundy-lite in which we learned a lot about each others' faith. Honestly, great discussions; everyone was respectful and open to learning. I don't believe in what they do, but I think both sides learned a lot. I'm an ebil Catholic and I remember one of the girls saying that their parents always said Catholics were bad and unChristian, but she didn't know why now after talking to me. Similarly, I understand a lot of the evangelical theology better thanks to them (not the patriarchal stuff, the whole "born again" concept - that was totally foreign to me). I even went over one of the girl's house. However, she was one of the more fundy members and I remember feeling like I had to be really cautious about what I talked about. When I mentioned that I wanted to be a doctor her mom was just like "Hmm". LOL. I am still FB friends with this girl and she recently had a lot of posts about how her family is anti-vaccine. Her best friend wears a prayer covering.

Anyway, the funny thing is, after I left there was a bunch of drama and infighting on the board. A majority of their moderators broke off to start a new message board. I went out with a bang and sent every moderator a long letter explaining my issues. On the new board, they seem to have implemented some of my suggestions in the rules! LOL! At least in name only. I'm not there enough to see if they actually enforce them, but for example, they have a specific clause that their no proselytizing rule applies to ALL religions, including Christianity, and will be enforced without favoritism. I signed up just to see what was happening and since I know most of those members, but I find it boring. Even though they don't have the "keep sweet" rule, everyone still has that attitude and their posts seem to have no content. I am on the more um, liberal board where we regularly have debates about social issues both having to do with dolls (like race representation) and not. Right now, we are talking about anti-vaxers.

That has been my biggest encounter with fundies... lol, yes, I had no idea previous to joining that there was so much internet drama about dolls. I joined because I never stopped thinking dolls were cool ;)

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Mot an actual encounter, but when I moved to this area I looked up the Duggars address and drove by their house. It was right after they had Jennifer and there was a big banner that said, "Welcome, Jennifer" or something like that. I used to have pictures, but I've been through 4 phones since then. They didn't transfer.

ETA: I'm really tempted to check out Smuggar's car lot.

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I collect dolls, and used to belong to a message board that I now suspect had a huge fundy population. A huge portion of the population of the board is from Utah so I'm guessing fundy Mormons. This is their mission statement: "The mission of AGFMB is to provide a safe, respectful, positive, welcoming, and kind forum where American Girl doll fans can discuss dolls in an atmosphere of friendship and support." Basically, one of their rules was to keep sweet (stay "positive" and "friendly"). We were not allowed to post anything negative. My favorite with this was in regards to the generic modern dolls who might look like a doll who had a character prescribed by the company (like a modern doll who looked like Samantha). We were not allowed to refer to them as the doll who looked like Samantha, or "not!Samantha", because that doll had her own identity, and it hurt people's feelings (who had that doll) that we weren't acknowledging her identity. Had something negative going on in your life? Don't post details, because it might scare people. Disagree with someone? Don't post, because you are causing drama and hurting people's feelings. They had another rule, that we could only talk about religion within the context of the AG books. This rule included that you couldn't proselytize, but as with the books, you could post educational information. Well, guess what... most of the characters are Christian!! HMMMMMM. Someone got banned for posting a photo album of her doll who was Pagan, teaching about Pagan customs (which should have fit under the educational clause). Yet, you were allowed to post things like "Don't worry, the LORD will see you through" in response to people's personal threads. The implementation of this rule was clearly not biased at all! Shortly before I left, they had a debate over whether the peace sign (featured on a clothing item I think) was acceptable to sell because it might not be Christian. Yet, we weren't supposed to have religious discussions. It was great for the LOLZ but eventually I couldn't take it anymore. They also played favorites, and I got on the black list, so it wasn't even worth staying a member just to read (I tried to get banned but was unsuccessful, lol! All I got were nasty private messages!).

I had some good discussions with some of the other teens at the time, who were evangelical/some definitely fundy or fundy-lite in which we learned a lot about each others' faith. Honestly, great discussions; everyone was respectful and open to learning. I don't believe in what they do, but I think both sides learned a lot. I'm an ebil Catholic and I remember one of the girls saying that their parents always said Catholics were bad and unChristian, but she didn't know why now after talking to me. Similarly, I understand a lot of the evangelical theology better thanks to them (not the patriarchal stuff, the whole "born again" concept - that was totally foreign to me). I even went over one of the girl's house. However, she was one of the more fundy members and I remember feeling like I had to be really cautious about what I talked about. When I mentioned that I wanted to be a doctor her mom was just like "Hmm". LOL. I am still FB friends with this girl and she recently had a lot of posts about how her family is anti-vaccine. Her best friend wears a prayer covering.

Anyway, the funny thing is, after I left there was a bunch of drama and infighting on the board. A majority of their moderators broke off to start a new message board. I went out with a bang and sent every moderator a long letter explaining my issues. On the new board, they seem to have implemented some of my suggestions in the rules! LOL! At least in name only. I'm not there enough to see if they actually enforce them, but for example, they have a specific clause that their no proselytizing rule applies to ALL religions, including Christianity, and will be enforced without favoritism. I signed up just to see what was happening and since I know most of those members, but I find it boring. Even though they don't have the "keep sweet" rule, everyone still has that attitude and their posts seem to have no content. I am on the more um, liberal board where we regularly have debates about social issues both having to do with dolls (like race representation) and not. Right now, we are talking about anti-vaxers.

That has been my biggest encounter with fundies... lol, yes, I had no idea previous to joining that there was so much internet drama about dolls. I joined because I never stopped thinking dolls were cool ;)

That sounds pretty funny! Did the board close down?

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I live in a liberal college town and ya can't swing a cat without hitting a fundy.

Grocery shopping today, frumpers getting out of one of those shuttle busses like the duggars have, with like eleventy kids. Mennonites, two different kinds, and Moslem women in a variety of head and face coverings. Seriously these are daily sightings.

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That sounds pretty funny! Did the board close down?

Nope, it's still going: agfansboard.proboards.com

It's a closed forum though, so you won't see much beyond their mission statement. (My friend tried to create a fake account to snoop, but it took about 6 months for her request to go through.) Most of the original people moved with the rest of the mods, though, so I have heard there's not much going on.

Here's some wank on it though:

Recent drama where the huge group of mods left - ag-over-18.livejournal.com/923976.html

Old drama, about the religion rule/pagan album (maybe the educational clause wasn't official but just how they explained it, looking at that again? I was a teen during this one and decided to stick it out...) - http://www.journalfen.net/community/fan ... 34600.html and http://www.journalfen.net/community/fan ... 37741.html

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Walked into the grocery store yesterday behind a long skirt wearing head coverer. Her head cover was a black scarf and it wasn't very attractive. She was with 2 boys, tweens by the look of them. She had a denim jacket on and plain flat payless shoes. While she was standing in the line, she was reading the gossip mags like most of us do.

Have seen Muslim women in various stage of cover from full on niqab to hijabs and long sleeves at the local mall and grocery stores.Doesn't bother me.

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Guest Anonymous

Even though I have been branded fundie & fundie-lite, here's mine that I posted when I first registered:

On 4/27 a violent tornado nearly destroyed my community. My family and I survived unharmed, and my house only had minor damage. As we were helping to get to and free those that were trapped, this man and his frumper clad wife suddenly appeared and started preaching. They said that this disaster was God's punishment for our wickedness. UNBELIEVABLE!! My neighbor got up in this man's face and said "My wife and son are missing. If you ain't here to help then get your goddamned ass off my property before I take that Bible of yours that you ain't fit to hold and shove it up your ass!" They left but not before preaching a little more hellfire and damnation.

My neighbor's wife and son were found and only had a few scrapes and bruises.

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I've never had a fundy experience :( no doubt because I live in England. Well, once I came across a chap in one of the parks in my town giving out creationist leaflets, but I don't think that alone would really count as fundy for most people on FJ.

You should come to Leicester! Getting mobbed by everyone from Mormons to Hari Krishnas is part of a normal day. We also have a fundy Muslim population who are definitely ones to avoid...

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oh hai Daenerys! I lived just outside Leicester till I left for university. Still miss it.

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Wherre I live there are a lot of Fundies, go to the flea market an d you'll see loads with prayer covers(I am no tincluding the mennonites or Amish in this accounting) A lot of th e homeschoolers are totally religious(Harry Potter is an ebil book!!) fundie or fundie lite. To be a part of their homeschooling group you have to sign a statement of faith which to me is laughable as it is totally against the foundation th e group was based on!

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There used to be a family who lived near me who always stayed together and wore Laura Asley dresses. They would all go to the park together, including the teenage daughters, and they never played with other children. I have no idea what kind of group they were or who they were as they moved away when I was quite young.

Never met any ultra fundies, Christian or otherwise (must be living in England!) but I know a fundy-lite girl. She went to a normal school and university and wore trousers etc, but she buys into the whole patriarchy thing and vowed to obey her husband in her wedding vows :(

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I'm a Christian so I'm part of a small forum / FB group of other Christian women. Most of them are either fundie or fundie-lite. I tend to keep my mouth shut about a lot of the stuff they talk about when they get super fundie. One woman is actually a follower of Quiverfull - I forgot how many kids she has but I think it's close to 10. She seems really miserable all the time because her kids just run amuck.

Sometimes it drives me crazy though. One of the women had a sister (or SIL) who was in danger from an abusive husband. The woman came up with a plan to help her, but it wasn't something her husband wouldn't have approved of. Everyone told her she needed to tell her husband SO HE COULD TELL HER WHAT TO DO! I was the only person who wasn't all "Your husband is god and you should listen to him".

My dad always had some fundie-lite leanings. When I was in college, he tried to trick me into signing a petition to help ban gay marriage in Michigan (I refused). And he keeps posting hate comments about Democrats / Obama on FB - I ignore that too but it makes me wince because it's just so hateful :(

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I was walking my dog at the local park on one of those broiling hot/high humidity days (heat index 110 - 115) when a maxi-van pulled into the parking lot to unload a bunch of kids. The boys were all wearing shorts, short-sleeve tops (mostly polo shirts but there were some tee-shirts too) and sneakers. The poor girls, however, all had on dark-colored ankle-length frumpers/skirts, long-sleeve (to the wrists) shirts, stockings, and shoes. The boys all had short hair (of course), and the girls all had shoulder-length or longer hair worn straight down their backs (apparently they weren't even allowed to do pony or pig-tails).

The boys proceeded to run and play, while the girls walked demurely behind. Those girls looked sooooo uncomfortable, with the sweat just pouring off them. I just wanted to cry for them. These were young girls who should have been wearing weather appropriate clothing and running about having fun right along with the boys. Instead, they were left to stand in the sun, and watch the boys have fun on the playground equipment, and swelter. The church-group chaperones didn't even have the sense to move them off into one of the shaded picnic groves or tree-lined walking trails. This encounter really drove home just how much was being taken from these girls. If they weren't even being allowed to have perfectly innocent fun at a park playground as young children, what little joy could these poor girls look forward to in their lives?

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So sad, doubtingkimmy. That contrast really is striking.

I recently ran into some fundies at a barbecue place around here. It was an older man with two younger adult women and a bunch of kids. They were dressed in Amish-y type clothes. They might have been Dunkers. I never see fundies so I was really happy. I smiled big and said hello. They hesitated a bit. Then the man said hello, followed by one of the adult women. I'm sure they thought I was weird.

My husband's family is fundie-lite. He is now what I call "fundie-lite influenced". That is, a normal person who feels compelled to attend church, spout religious gobbledy-gook, tut-tut at fun activities in which they gladly participated at one time, and be judgemental toward people who do not fit the rigid "fundie-lite" mold. He was cool and funny when I married him, now he is going through a "church-lady" phase. I am hoping it passes and my normal, funny husband comes back.

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Do Jehovah's Witnesses count? The other day I was walking out of the grocery store (dressed semi-fundie-esque if that counts for anything) and as I was stepping into the parking lot I heard, "HEY. LADY." I turned and looked towards the sound of the yelling and saw two men sitting in a car, one waving the Watchtower magazine thing at me and motioning for me to head over to him. Needless to say, I just kept walking. Worst proselytizing ever.

Also, I gave a couple of Mormons some muffins when I lived outside of DC. I was at home making chocolate chip muffins and there was a knock at the door. I answered and it was... Mormons (their tags said they were elders, but they looked about 18; I was confused)! I was super excited and wanted to invite them in and ask if Matt Stone and Trey Parker accurately portrayed their religion, offer to sing the Joseph Smith song from South Park, etc. but my fiance would have absolutely NONE of that. Sooo I went back to the Mormons and said, "Sorry, you can't come in, but... do you want a muffin? They're chocolate chip and everything!" The one who seemed to be in charge looked at me like I had two heads. "Who made them?" When I confirmed that they were, in fact, made by a woman they took the muffins, handed me some literature in Spanish (???) on Mormonism and wandered off. I never saw them again.

ETA: Not much of a specific encounter, but... When I lived outside of DC I was just down the street from the Lancaster County Dutch Market (they have the BEST fried chicken and awesome soft pretzels, by the way. Check 'em out if you're ever in Germantown, MD stalking the PostSecret guy or something) which was run by head covering, plain dressing Mennonites. I always got a kick out of the girls in their handmade cape dresses and Nikes, smoking cigarettes and texting. :lol: One of them used to not-so nonchalantly follow me around the store and would often flat out stare at me when she was serving me at the pretzel counter. My fiance decided she had a crush on me, while I decided she was just horrified by my lip piercings and making sure I didn't turn into a demon or something. :lol:

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Do Jehovah's Witnesses count? The other day I was walking out of the grocery store (dressed semi-fundie-esque if that counts for anything) and as I was stepping into the parking lot I heard, "HEY. LADY." I turned and looked towards the sound of the yelling and saw two men sitting in a car, one waving the Watchtower magazine thing at me and motioning for me to head over to him. Needless to say, I just kept walking.

Also, I gave a couple of Mormons some muffins when I lived outside of DC. I was at home making chocolate chip muffins and there was a knock at the door. I answered and it was... Mormons (their tags said they were elders, but they looked about 18; I was confused)! I was super excited and wanted to invite them in and ask if Matt Stone and Trey Parker accurately portrayed their religion, offer to sing the Joseph Smith song from South Park, etc. but my fiance would have absolutely NONE of that. Sooo I went back to the Mormons and said, "Sorry, you can't come in, but... do you want a muffin? They're chocolate chip and everything!" The one who seemed to be in charge looked at me like I had two heads. "Who made them?" When I confirmed that they were, in fact, made by a woman they took the muffins, handed me some literature in Spanish (???) on Mormonism and wandered off. I never saw them again. :P

I had an awesome JW encounter at the train station once (there really aren't any Christian fundies in my area, but the JWs are pretty common). She came up to me with her literature and started asking me about how I felt about what was going on the in world. Wasn't I afraid? Wasn't I concerned.

I told her no. She looked shocked. I said, "The world has always been messed up and we will always think it's more messed up than ever. Would I rather be living in today's messed up world than be a Mediaeval peasant, or be a slave in the American south, or live in Nazi Germany? I think I have it prety good.

She had no answer. She told me to have a nice day and walked away.

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I had an awesome JW encounter at the train station once...She came up to me with her literature and started asking me about how I felt about what was going on the in world. Wasn't I afraid? Wasn't I concerned.

That must be a standard script that JWs are taught. I have been approached a few times with those opening lines.

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Here in the southern United States, I have had a lot of experiences with fundie lites.

My son and his close friend was befriended by a girl(let's call her Cathy) whose parents decided to become quiverful. Because her family did not make this decision until their daughters were in their mid to late teens, there is still some modern thinking among the girls. For example, one of the girls has been involved in plays and they wear pants. This particular girl had a crush on my son's friend. She hinted to him that he could start a relationship with her. Another guy had apparently started courting Cathy but her family was out of sorts with him because he told their daughter that he loved her more than god. That must have led to an opening in Cathy's mind to start texting my son's friend and letting him know that she might be free. My son's friend ignored her because he was bothered by the amount of control that her family would have over them as a couple. He actually really liked her but was too independent to be constantly judged by her dad.

My daughter attended an Awana meeting as a guest of a friend. The friend was male but she had to go to the girls' meeting. During the meeting the teacher asked when they thought they should date. No one raised their hand so my daughter responded that she couldn't date until the age of 16. The teacher told her that was incorrect. She was supposed to court and not date.

I once had the misfortune of being present when a group of friends grew very angry about gay marriage in NY. I was shocked by the fury that these supposedly nice, religious people expressed. One man suggested that all gay people be sent to the front of the lines in war. Luckily, my friend spoke up and told him he was wrong. Honestly, I was too shocked and surprised to know how to respond. I've tried to avoid those people but they are friends of friends.

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I was SO excited last week when for the first time I had 2 LDS guys on their mission knock on my door - I wanted to just talked with them, but it was cold and my husband was waiting. So, I told them I am part of a theater group that is 75% LDS and that I feel like any questions I have can be answered there, and that I used to own a Book of Mormon, but I gave it away (I didnt tell them I gave it to a thrift store :)). This made them happy and we parted nicely. :)

I am the most "fundy" person in my church, so I don't see a lot of fundies. But the only "sighting" that consistently creeps me out is these women who wear long skirts and have long hair and there are always like 3 of them. They are kind of...dirty? And they stand on the side of this intersection with orange buckets asking people for money. And there is often ONE older guy kind of overseeing them - Hubby and I decided that are polygamists who live on a compound. :) We actually have NOTHING against polygamy - it's the begging for money, dirtiness of it that is hard for us. And the guy looking like if they don't make enough money he will hurt them. We could be totally reading into the situation - maybe they are all single moms and he is helping them out? ;-) :-p

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