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Miss Raquel's lack of girl friends


formergothardite

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I"ve noticed that in the pictures she posts of her hanging out with friends, Miss Raquel usually hangs out with guys, which is unsual with fundie maidens. I honestly think that this is because most girls can see through her bullshit "modest maiden" act. She posted a couple of weeks ago about some of her friends who are girls getting mad at the things she said (not her fault, of course :roll: ) and refusing to speak to her for a long time. I also think that since she thinks dating is sin, this is her way of having a boyfriend.

http://god-sdaughter.blogspot.com/

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There is nothing wrong with wanting romance or finding a young man attractive. I wish that Raquel's parents hadn't convinced her that normal desires for romance are evil.

There is nothing wrong with hanging out with mainly boys. Before I was married, a lot of my friends were guys. However, I had some female friends too.

Sometimes I feel really bad for her.

The heart photo makes me think that she would like a boyfriend.

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I wonder if growing up in a very patriarchal lifestyle/community makes young women less trusting of other women because women are seen as less reliable, less worthy etc than men?

But yeah, there's nothing wrong with having a lot of male friends as a woman.

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I don't think there is anything wrong with having lots of male friends as a woman, but I have always gotten the impression that Miss Raquel is desperate for a real boyfriend and this is her way of doing it. She can hang out and flirt (let's face it with the type of pictures she posts of herself, she it totally flirting) with lots of guys and at the end of the day still claim to be giving her whole pure heart to her husband.

And I think the girls in her life see through her. Most of her posts about friends who are girls involve drama. Like the time she cried for days and needed her parents to confront the one girl who dared to suggest Miss Raquel had a crush. And then the latest when most of the girls wouldn't even talk to her because of the things she says and does (of course it was all them not understanding her. she it totally a modest maiden with a pure heart).

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I wonder if growing up in a very patriarchal lifestyle/community makes young women less trusting of other women because women are seen as less reliable, less worthy etc than men?

But yeah, there's nothing wrong with having a lot of male friends as a woman.

I think what you wrote is probably true. Imagine being a girl who is told that women are weak, overly emotional beings, who need protection.Most of us would realize that if we don't fit that sterotype, other women might not also. Some women(Raquel might be one of them) would feel it too threatening to question their parents' teachings and would accept that men are superior to women. So why would they want female friends?

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I don't think there is anything wrong with having lots of male friends as a woman, but I have always gotten the impression that Miss Raquel is desperate for a real boyfriend and this is her way of doing it. She can hang out and flirt (let's face it with the type of pictures she posts of herself, she it totally flirting) with lots of guys and at the end of the day still claim to be giving her whole pure heart to her husband.

And I think the girls in her life see through her. Most of her posts about friends who are girls involve drama. Like the time she cried for days and needed her parents to confront the one girl who dared to suggest Miss Raquel had a crush. And then the latest when most of the girls wouldn't even talk to her because of the things she says and does (of course it was all them not understanding her. she it totally a modest maiden with a pure heart).

Yes, I get the impression she is a huge flirt, and thoroughly likes being the center of attention. I thought her Valentine's Day post to her future husband was telling, in that she wrote something like "I wonder if I have already met you." I'm guessing she hopes "the Lord" will tell one of her guy friends she's his future helpmeet.

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Personally, I think it is going to be Daniel, the Anonymous Antagonist. He has been having "visions" of his future wife that rather resemble Miss Raquel and they do hang out a lot together.

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I wonder if growing up in a very patriarchal lifestyle/community makes young women less trusting of other women because women are seen as less reliable, less worthy etc than men?

[snip]...

I imagine there's not only that, but the competition factor. We in my generation (I'm 60) used to see that a lot: it was considered normal and typical for a woman to poach a friend's guy because "that's really all that's important to girls [sic] - getting married;" whereas it was weird and unusual for a guy to "betray a friend" by going after his gal. One of the most artistic, supposedly free-thinking friends I had back in university also said, "Guys have their careers to think about as well as getting married; women are really primarily interested in getting married."

....In retrospect, I owe her for that. It was so repugnant to hear it stated - and out of her own mouth - that I redoubled my resolve not to marry 'til I was well graduated and employed!

But I digress. Yes, I would think that true female friendships in patriarchy are rare and are discouraged, tacitly and overtly. Besides which - there's that lesbos thing that happens if girls are allowed too much freedom to think, y'know. :rolleyes:

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Yes, I get the impression she is a huge flirt, and thoroughly likes being the center of attention. I thought her Valentine's Day post to her future husband was telling, in that she wrote something like "I wonder if I have already met you." I'm guessing she hopes "the Lord" will tell one of her guy friends she's his future helpmeet.

Which may be why she doesn't have a lot of girlfriends. The less competition, the better.

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Guest Anonymous
Personally, I think it is going to be Daniel, the Anonymous Antagonist. He has been having "visions" of his future wife that rather resemble Miss Raquel and they do hang out a lot together.

He's certainly no prize, but better him (or anyone! or no one!) than Stoner Josiah. That guy is a scary, scary, creep. I wouldn't let him have charge of a gerbil.

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Personally, I think it is going to be Daniel, the Anonymous Antagonist. He has been having "visions" of his future wife that rather resemble Miss Raquel and they do hang out a lot together.

Yeah, I thought Daniel was the one she seemed most interested in.

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I can't really bring myself to snark overly on Raquel, because she's such a fucking baby. Still, my two pennies: I suspect she finds it easier to deal with boys because she gets to be the silly, pretty, childish, girly girl when she wants to; it requires less maturity, as they don't expect her to reasonable or mature on account of being a girl. There's nothing wrong with enjoying the attention and flirtation of boys but I think she'd benefit a lot from a real, deep friendship without that in play - girl, gay boy, whatever. Girl exhibits no fucking emotional or social maturity whatsoever and seems to have no clue how to handle her peers, and relatedly, no self-awareness or insights of herself either.

Plus, with the boys - you just know she gets a fucking metric shit-ton of "oh, other girls are [insert teenage boy pet peeve of choice] but you, Raquel, so different". Woohoo self validation and baby steps towards internalized misogyny, amirite?

It's just - I hope she grows out of all this idiotic crap; I think it would only take one friend or crush with a different worldview and perspective to shake her a good bit. She doesn't seem mean or hateful, just not very bright, incredibly misinformed and hopelessly naive. In most ways she's the most typical cliche teenage girl I've ever seen on the internet.

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Personally, I think it is going to be Daniel, the Anonymous Antagonist. He has been having "visions" of his future wife that rather resemble Miss Raquel and they do hang out a lot together.

I think you're right. I would say that I hope they both do some growing up before they commit to a courtship or betrothal or whatever, but I'm sure that's impossible in their case.

Speaking of growing up, how old is Miss Raquel? I remember being pretty self-absorbed during my late teenage years (weren't we all?), but I certainly don't remember being as naive and childish as Miss Raquel seems to be. She analyzes everything - movies, books, life, relationships, etc. - on a superficial, preteen level. I would have failed my high school English class if I consistently turned in writing like hers.

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On his site, the Anoymous Antagonist has an interview with a young woman named Bethany who sounds more mature and deep than either Daniel or Raquel. I haven't read the entire interview and would probably disagree with portions of it, however, she does seem to express herself well

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When Raquel does get married, the first year is going to be very, very hard for her. She has such unrealistic ideas about love and marriage and no guy is going to be able to live up to the guy she has been writing all these letters to. I am doubting any guy is going to want to spend the wedding night reading the book of letters she wrote like she thinks is going to happen.

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Which may be why she doesn't have a lot of girlfriends. The less competition, the better.

Yep, despite all the talk of being feminine and lady-like a lot of our "fave" fundie bloggers seem to have a problem with women in general.

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Yep, despite all the talk of being feminine and lady-like a lot of our "fave" fundie bloggers seem to have a problem with women in general.

Well, of course they do! Other ladies are a huge threat to her future husband! Imagine, any lady friend you have around could become a potential stumbling block for your headship because, you know, males are incapable of controlling their sexual thoughts and want to jump on anything with a vagina. :think:

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