How "sheltered" from the mainstream world does....

[fakepigtails73]

How sheltered from the mainstream world does one become when they convert to Gothardism-ATI?

For example, let's say a wife and husband, conservatives, with 5 children, talk about becoming quiverfull "because they love the Duggars so much". They order one wisdom booklet to look through from ATI ; the kids are in public school but as of next year they will all be homeschooled. Mr and Mrs ATI_to-be love it, so, after much praying, the headship and his wife decide to go "all-out" ATI: no more pants for the girls, hair for the boys must be cut short at all times, Mom quits her part-time job as a receptionist so she can "fulfill her womanhood for God". Dad owns a garage.

My question is: how much of their previous lifestyle would they have to give up if they decide to embrace Gothardism-ATI? How much "oversight" over their daily lives would the Gothard people have over them? I mean, do they have "elders" who would visit them monthly to see how well they live this new lifestyle? Does ATI accept everyone with means ($$) to buy their homeschooling material and then attend their conference, or do they restrict the number of "wannabes" to the families that satisfy other Gothard requirements?

My question sounds weird, but I've always been fascinated by cults...I would never join a sect like this.

I just wonder how it must be for children whose parents decide to become full-on ATI, when they knew how life was before...

(If my questions are not clear enough let me know)

Thanks!

[kaetrin]

How sheltered from the mainstream world does one become when they convert to Gothardism-ATI?

For example, let's say a wife and husband, conservatives, with 5 children, talk about becoming quiverfull "because they love the Duggars so much". They order one wisdom booklet to look through from ATI ; the kids are in public school but as of next year they will all be homeschooled. Mr and Mrs ATI_to-be love it, so, after much praying, the headship and his wife decide to go "all-out" ATI: no more pants for the girls, hair for the boys must be cut short at all times, Mom quits her part-time job as a receptionist so she can "fulfill her womanhood for God". Dad owns a garage.

My question is: how much of their previous lifestyle would they have to give up if they decide to embrace Gothardism-ATI? How much "oversight" over their daily lives would the Gothard people have over them? I mean, do they have "elders" who would visit them monthly to see how well they live this new lifestyle? Does ATI accept everyone with means ($$) to buy their homeschooling material and then attend their conference, or do they restrict the number of "wannabes" to the families that satisfy other Gothard requirements?

My question sounds weird, but I've always been fascinated by cults...I would never join a sect like this.

I just wonder how it must be for children whose parents decide to become full-on ATI, when they knew how life was before...

(If my questions are not clear enough let me know)

Thanks!

This won't answer all your questions, but

1: You have to apply to join ATI; you can't just sign up/buy the materials. You can't even buy Wisdom Booklets until you are accepted. They recruit primarily through the seminars, which lay the foundation for the "higher standards" of the full program. I don't know what kinds of questions they ask in the application, but probably stuff about your willingness to "let God plan your family" etc. It gets pretty nit-picky: I think at one time they wouldn't allow men with beards to join unless they shaved (because Gothard thought it looked "rebellious") or got a religious exemption statement from their church (like Mennonites and whatnot). They definitely promote it as a whole lifestyle, not just a curriculum.

2: I remember my dad having monthly Men's Meetings with local ATI fathers which were strongly "accountability" focused. I'm sure there was plenty of peer pressure there to make sure they were keeping the TV locked up in the closet and so forth.

3: When we joined, I was 13 but I had already been home schooled before that, and my mother was a SAHM, so some of the changes were not as extreme as in your example. You have to give up a lot, still. No TV, no secular or contemporary Christian music, no pants for girls, no dating, and no birth control, are the big ones I remember. I also had to give up ballet when my parents decided it wasn't modest.

[Elle]

1: You have to apply to join ATI; you can't just sign up/buy the materials. You can't even buy Wisdom Booklets until you are accepted. They recruit primarily through the seminars, which lay the foundation for the "higher standards" of the full program.

Sounds to me like they want to make sure you're going to be willing to fork over all your cash since those seminars aren't free.

2: I remember my dad having monthly Men's Meetings with local ATI fathers which were strongly "accountability" focused. I'm sure there was plenty of peer pressure there to make sure they were keeping the TV locked up in the closet and so forth.

It takes a support group to keep up the momentum!

I also had to give up ballet when my parents decided it wasn't modest.

Irony here is that every classical ballet focuses on a frail woman (which is why dancers are so thin, it makes them look more delicate) waiting for a man to save her. Even in Giselle, where she "saves" the asshole by begging the Willis to not kill him, she still died for loving him and he got off scott-free.

[Deleted06]

What about David & Priscilla? Since their parents are ATI are they automatically "in" or do they have to fill out their own application?

[snickerz]

I have a spin-off question. On the thread about Razing Ruth's sister, she mentioned that the sister had never even been in a room by herself (alone) before, so she was now overwhelmed with all the choices/freedoms, etc. on the "outside." If this is normal (and from what I've seen of the Duggars/Bates/Maxwells it looks like it may be) how does a person go from being so sheltered (never making a decision, never being alone, never having a thought of their own) to suddenly being an "adult" upon marriage? How does a boy cope with having to interact with NIKE people to support his family? How does he go from never making a decision to suddenly being responsible for making all the decisions? How does a girl cope with being alone while hubby is working, and cope with having to go out into public by herself, make decisions about her kids, etc? It seems like people from this background would be paralyzed by fear and therefore unable to function.

[Tee-Tee]

I don't know, snickerz, but I've done some study on 'cult deprogrammers' and, as it's, well, a cult, I imagine it'd work the same way...lots of help from counselors (work, study, therapy) and psychiatrists, as well as 'exit counseling' professionals. It's weirdly fascinating.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deprogramming

Five Stages:

1. Discredit the figure of authority: the cult leader (Goathead...I mean Gothard)

2. Present contradictions (ideology versus reality): "How can he preach love when he exploits people?" is an example.

3. The breaking point: When a subject begins to listen to the deprogrammer; when reality begins to take precedence over ideology.

4. Self-expression: When the subject begins to open up and voice gripes against the cult. (Joshie: I like fast food, I like TV, I like Skinemax after Anna goes to bed...)

5. Identification and transference: when the subject begins to identify with the deprogrammers, starts to think of him- or herself as an opponent of the cult rather than a member of it. (We're comin' fer ya, Hannie baby, hold on!)

P.S. 'Cult Deprogramming' is my name for my new band, nobody take it, k? Thnx.

ETA: Is the 'prayer closet' considered a room alone?