Facebooker wants to court a Duggar

[SpeakNow]

Creepy

 

 

 

Quote

Dustin Grussing

Hi Mrs. Duggar, my name is Dustin and my family and I have been watching your show since it started, when you were in your first rental house, teaching everyone to make tatertot casserole! By the way we love it! I was wondering, I am 23 and I study the Lord's word everyday (we all do in my household) and I really have never dated, because I believe in finding the young lady God has just for me. I am shy, but I also respect the Lord's word and his belief in courting someone and marrying my best-friend first, then all the rest comes after you become best friends. I have went to College for 4 years and I am licensed in CPR (Dr. and Nurse Certified), I am half way through becoming a Respritory Therapist. I have a Associates degree in Sciences as well as General studies and I have a Medical Transcripting Certificate.

I am interested in one of your daughters, and I respect her and her beliefs as well as Mr. Duggars as well. We love the Lord and we serve the Lord in this household and put him first in all we do. We have helped out a homeless shelter here in Illinois for almost 10 yrs. now, and my mother sings worship music and has a Youth Ministry License as well as teaches Sunday school to. My 17 yr old bro. and I teach Sunday school to (our own class, we love kids!) and I have taken some Seminary classes in College as well. The Lord has done some remarkable things in my life and my families life, and we live by his word. I have been praying about this for about 4 years now and I believe I am suppose to at least talk with or meet your daughter. What would I need to do, to do that? Thank you for your time. God bless.

[reds]

I think the creepy factor would be part of the response from Mrs/Mr Duggar. I also think the young man went about this in the wrong way. As if only to get press/noticed by others.

[mrs]

I wonder what JBob will say. My money is on the comment being deleted.

What would happen if a Marine asked one of the older girls to the Marine Corp Ball? You can't say know w/o looking un-supportive of the military.

[Cerysbell]

How absolutely bizarre. Four years of praying and in all that time, this was the best way he could think of approaching it.

[belowrubies]

His mom teaches Sunday school instead of sitting in the pews, meaning, their church allows females to teach. Fail.

[Rachel333]

Does he want a specific daughter, or will any one of them do?

[jesssnerch]

Everything else aside, the fact that he used "have went" is the deal breaker for me.

[Kitty]

His mom teaches Sunday school instead of sitting in the pews, meaning, their church allows females to teach. Fail.

Michelle is, in theory, in charge of the home-schooling. Since the Duggars also home-church, this means that they also allow females to teach and wouldn't have any room to complain about Dustin's mother.

[mrs]

ughh I feel so sorry for those daughters.

[Boogalou]

I wonder what JBob will say. My money is on the comment being deleted.

What would happen if a Marine asked one of the older girls to the Marine Corp Ball? You can't say know w/o looking un-supportive of the military.

What? Of course you can say no if you don't want to go with them. Supporting the military doesn't mean you automatically go out with any random military member who asks.

And... back on topic. Posting that on facebook is probably not the best way to go about courting someone but by fundie standards I don't really view it as that weird. Isn't that basically what Josh had to do? Ask Pa Keller about his daughter that he had spent all of four minutes with if he could court her? An e-mail probably would have been better, but still weird.

[Kitty]

ughh I feel so sorry for those daughters.

So do I. :(

[emmyfair]

While I totally agree that this guy's letter is bloody creepy, I can't help but notice how much his achievements outshine the Smuggar car lot. I bet his letter gets deleted based on that alone.

[tabitha2]

Remember they get lot of these creepers.I think it is just par for the course by now.

[mrs]

What? Of course you can say no if you don't want to go with them. Supporting the military doesn't mean you automatically go out with any random military member who asks.

And... back on topic. Posting that on facebook is probably not the best way to go about courting someone but by fundie standards I don't really view it as that weird. Isn't that basically what Josh had to do? Ask Pa Keller about his daughter that he had spent all of four minutes with if he could court her? An e-mail probably would have been better, but still weird.

I was think in the more of celebrity "Hollywood" way. Like Justin Timberlake ect. Like being asked in a public place or tv. But I see your point. :)

[Trynn]

Everything else aside, the fact that he used "have went" is the deal breaker for me.

And to instead of too twice in two sentences. And Mr. Duggars instead of Mr. Duggar's. And...and...and...

[Boogalou]

He wants to court Jana. And Dianne helpfully gave him the Duggar's e-mail address and home phone number. So, so strange.

[ukjingernut]

Ugh. Poor girls, having to put up with stuff like this.

I hope that he meant he has an interest in a specific one of the older girls and simply worded it badly. But it reads very much as 'give me whichever you can spare even if it means waiting a year or two for Joy'

[BravaAmica]

Crazy stalker is crazy.

His post made my alarms bells go off. He's insane. Hope the Duggars take the proper security precautions to keep their daughters safe.

[Ralar]

Based on his writing skilz, I'd say there's a good chance he "has went" to the College of the Holy Basement.

[luckylibrarian]

Is Diane nuts? Why would she give out their phone number without permission? The guy sounds creepy.

[slickcat79]

Wait, is this on the 19K&C page? Again...IT'S A FAN PAGE :doh: The Duggars do not run it. They very likely don't read it (except for probably Josh, to see if anyone is talking about him). Really hope the guy's just trolling...

[Ralar]

Really hope the guy's just trolling...

When I first read his message, I thought it could be one of The Free Jingers (Thanks Lina, I love the name you gave us! Much catchier than FJers).

[Fundilicious]

Is there a link to this?

[xReems]

Wow...

Then again, isn't that how some of these courtships work? I feel like some of these fundie couples barely knew each other prior to courtship. It seems like the guy tells the girl's father what God has been telling him, they pray about it, father invites boy over, boy meets girl in a chaperoned location, girl tells father what she feels and pray about it, boy tells girl's father God is telling him girl is the one and asks the girl's hand in courtship, father and possible future son in law pray, father asks girl about it, girl prays for a few days, girl tells the father yes, father tells the guy and courtship ensues, courtship involves chaperoned getting to know each other, few months later guy proposes to girl, pray and celebrate, couple of more months later marriage occurs between guy and girl, a few more months later, God blesses them with a gift (child).

[Ralar]

This guy sounds similar to someone who wanted to meet me, many years ago!

About 20 years ago, my father reconnected with his bar mitzvah tutor. Back in the day, the tutor was a student at Yeshiva University. He went on to become an Orthodox Rabbi. Anyhow, one Thanksgiving someone asked him who his first bar mitzvah student was, and he immediately remembered my father (it had been 50 years). He tracked him down and called to say hello. They started meeting for lunch and renewed their friendship. Of course, they spoke about their children: my father mentioned his single, attorney daughter (me) and HK mentioned his single "accountant" son. My father asked if he could give HK my phone number for his son. I said okay, and within hours a strange, strange man called me.

It turns out he was an auditor for the City of NY (I just googled him and now he's an administrative asst for City of NY), not an accountant, and although that was his paying job, he was also a rabbi (he assisted his father). From conversation #1, I was not interested in the guy -- he was creepy -- but he wanted to fly from NY to Fla to meet me. I told him that wouldn't be a good idea. I told him I was applying to rabbinical school, which is a huge no-no for Orthodox Jews. He told me that was cool and we'd work out any differences. I told him I couldn't speak and had to go.

He called again a few days later, late at night and wouldn't hang up. The phone kept ringing and ringing. This was back before caller ID and answering machines. I finally answered the phone. I pretended he woke me and told him I couldn't speak. I told him I had company, male company. He still wanted to chat! I hung up.

A day or two later, I received a card from him. He signed it LOVE, First Name, Middle Name, Last Name. I ignored the card. About a week later, I received a letter from him. It looked like a third grader wrote it and was covered with highlighting and hearts. He told me he was buying a plane ticket to come see me (after I had told him no multiple times)! He included a photo of himself and signed the letter: Passionately, First Name, Middle Name, Last Name. The love letter included a photo (from a photo booth). He was pasty white, had a bowl cut with uneven bangs, his tie was crooked, etc. He looked so pathetic it was funny. My brother-in-law showed up at my law office right after I received the card (I think my father had given his friend, creepy guy's father, my business card), and I accused my brother-in-law of writing/highlighting the letter and enclosing a pic of a creepy-looking guy. But no, it was really from APK, the creepy guy in NY.

At a family dinner the next week, my cousin was making fun of someone and I said that person could not be half as pathetic as APK. Everyone thought I was being mean to some poor guy, so I went out to my car and retrieved the highlighted envelope, letter, and photo. Everyone had a huge laugh, passing them around the table. Then my father called his friend and told him that his son had to stop calling & writing me!

Hey, Joshie, please tell your parents not to set up your sisters with creepy Dustin!