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CustardTart

This made me feel really sad for J-B

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CustardTart

 

 

Seeing J-B tear up made me feel sad for him when I watched this video. :cry:

 

(Josie's birth.)

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dizzy

I got caught off guard by a moment that made me feel bad for him yesterday, too. Once the clip was over I remembered why he's reprensible, naturally, but I was watching the episode with his dad's funeral on youtube yesterday since it's been brought up here a few times, and I'd never seen it. When he sees that Jana's done that slideshow and he sits down to watch it he's just bawling by the end. I also noted that he gives Jana a two hugs when he stands up - big, tight, full frontal one. In a way, it's nice to see that some moments of intense emotion can still crack that brainwashed veneer.

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Lainey

Meh. The thing is, he helped to put Michelle into that situation, and he is willing to do so again, and again, and again...

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ladypuglover
Meh. The thing is, he helped to put Michelle into that situation, and he is willing to do so again, and again, and again...

This.

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Kitty

Jim Bob is an idiot, but it's hard not to like the guy a little bit sometimes.

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dairyfreelife
Meh. The thing is, he helped to put Michelle into that situation, and he is willing to do so again, and again, and again...

I'd say yes, but that sadly could happen to someone on their first child so I hesitate to blame the man for getting a woman pregnant and anything that happens to her is his fault. Michelle here is just as much at fault as he is as it was a matter of time before something serious happened and she wants all the babies just as much if not more so than JimBob. They are both willing to risk her life for more-both are equally reprehensible, but it does show that JimBob does actually care about his wife and children, at least a little bit.

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CC3

Seeing J-B tear up made me feel sad for him when I watched this video. :cry:

(Josie's birth.)

Me, too. I think he would fall to pieces if something awful happened to Michelle. When I first saw that show, I thought he might come to his senses about more pregnancies. It's sad. They have boxed themselves into a corner with this no birth control nonsense, and now they are rolling the dice with her life every time they are intimate.

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Koala

I don't even like him a little bit. People like J-B are dangerous. He appears just stupid and nice enough for people to like him and feel sorry for him, but in reality, he's crazy like a fox. He's at the very least complicit in keeping all of his children from leading "normal" lives and denying them a decent education.

I've watched him with those younger kids...he acts like he doesn't even know who they are. He's polite to them sure, but he basically just pats them on the head and sends them off to look for their sister mothers.

It's a damn shame that JB and Michelle can't be forced to raise their own children. That'd put an end the this fuckery they've got going on, and you can bet your ass it'd "cure" Michelle of her incessant need to be pregnant.

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Elle

I'd say yes, but that sadly could happen to someone on their first child so I hesitate to blame the man for getting a woman pregnant and anything that happens to her is his fault. Michelle here is just as much at fault as he is as it was a matter of time before something serious happened and she wants all the babies just as much if not more so than JimBob. They are both willing to risk her life for more-both are equally reprehensible, but it does show that JimBob does actually care about his wife and children, at least a little bit.

Yeah, a lot of people like to man-hate and say HE DID THIS TO HER ZOMG instead of acknowledging HER CHOICE in this. They were together for FIVE years before getting involved in this. Before that, she went to school and even wore shorts shorter than I'd even put on my own whore-ass. They were far from fundie. If she didn't want to go along with it, she was educated enough to know she could leave him. And how do we even know she wasn't the one who spearheaded the idea and got him on board? While it's attractive for a man to be in control, you know there's going to be the concern about earning enough to support as many kids as she can pop out. And I'm sure it's attractive for some omen to not have to ever work and to put it all on his shoulders. I can see the original suggestion to enter being hers or his. We don't know who suggested it, but we do know they were together for five years before entering the life.

If any of us here who are married to men were approached by our husbands one day demanding we submit and be servants because we only exist to have babies, and were serious, we'd dump their asses. So I really do not believe for a second he just decided on it one day and poor ignorant MIchelle just decided to forsake her education and work history and everything to follow alone and play house. This isn't a situation where she was raised thinking it's what women had no choice but to do. It's not even like Meredith, who was raised like that and married a man who wasn't raised fundie but decided some arm-candy would be nice so went trolling the internet. No. Michelle was smart enough to know her options, unlike almost every other fundie out there.

Just as much as JB "helped put" Michelle in this situation, she helped him right back.

Also, as much as I hate them both, I think he seems more interested in spending time with the kids than she does. She likes to tour without the kids, o maybe with a couple of the older girls. He's the one more likely to be doing an activity with a handful of the kids including the younger ones. He was the one to admit concern about more kids after Josie (though I know he didn't wrap it up or keep it in his pants) while Michelle as looking forward to number 20. I can't help but think that a lot of this is driven by her. For all her saccharine sweetness, I think she's a bitch behind the scenes. It always seems that the bigger the bitch, the more aspartame they pour on to keep the rest of the world from knowing.

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tabitha2

I met someone in passing once who said she knew the Duggars-in her words,JB was a ''big teddy bear'' and Michelle was very much in charge.Grain a salt but just sayin'.

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3 is enough
I met someone in passing once who said she knew the Duggars-in her words,JB was a ''big teddy bear'' and Michelle was very much in charge.Grain a salt but just sayin'.

I can totally see this as being the case. He obviously loves her way more than she loves him. I bet he still can't believe that the cheerleader married him. And he does seem to be much more connected to the kids than her- of course he doesn't have to do the grunt work, being the patriarch and all, but at least he interacts with them.

Having said that, he's still batshit crazy for buying into Gothard's cult.

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EmmieJ
Meh. The thing is, he helped to put Michelle into that situation, and he is willing to do so again, and again, and again...

Yes, this. It's hard to feel bad for anyone who ends up in a bad situation, on purpose. He and Michelle have both chosen to ignore the facts of life (aging mother, with multiple pregnancies and worn out uterus, shouldn't have any more, yet goes right ahead and gets pregnant anyway). Even after Josie, they did it again and she had a miscarriage. Mother Nature has been pretty clear with the two of them.

Edited to add: I definitely agree that Michelle is the one running the ship in this marriage. It all revolves around JB making sure she is happy. In return, he gets to parade around as the head of the household, and because of their ginormous family, has made lots of money (his second true love). I think the tears we saw when Josie was born was more the realization that Michelle was in serious medical trouble. That's what probably freaked him out the most. But if they have a disagreement, I feel sure that Michelle gets her way, sooner or later. Not to say she doesn't love him. I think as much as she is capable of loving another, it it JimBob that gets her best. But she loves him in great part because she has him wrapped around her finger completely. I don't get the feeling she really loves her children, so much as she loves and needs the attention she gets for having so many of them.

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Elle
It all revolves around JB making sure she is happy. In return, he gets to parade around as the head of the household, and because of their ginormous family, has made lots of money (his second true love).

In the book Gone with the Wind, when Scarlett was having her first child, it was said that women were expected to be quiet while men could hoot and holler over a splinter, and women were expected to basically run the household while giving him praise for his mastership over the home. Only in the Duggars' case, they both decided to enter this sort of thing.

I think the tears we saw when Josie was born was more the realization that Michelle was in serious medical trouble. That's what probably freaked him out the most.

I remember him talking about whether or not there'd even be another one because he was afraid for her life while Michelle was hung ho on #20 right away. Of course he could have wrapped it up or kept it under wraps, but it's pretty telling about their relationship dynamics that he was at least seemingly willing to reconsider while she was NOT.

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tabitha2
In the book Gone with the Wind, when Scarlett was having her first child, it was said that women were expected to be quiet while men could hoot and holler over a splinter, and women were expected to basically run the household while giving him praise for his mastership over the home. Only in the Duggars' case, they both decided to enter this sort of thing.

Scarlett never fit in with the genteel image and habits of femininity her mother and mammy tried to force on her,though she tried could act it to get her way, and that's what saved her and her family during and after the war.

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CustardTart

I can totally see this as being the case. He obviously loves her way more than she loves him. I bet he still can't believe that the cheerleader married him. And he does seem to be much more connected to the kids than her- of course he doesn't have to do the grunt work, being the patriarch and all, but at least he interacts with them.

I get this vibe, too.

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gustava

I get this vibe, too.

I've been pondering the "she loves him more" since it was first suggested on FJ, and I'm just not sure. What attracted her to him? If she was all that popular and hip, what did she see in him?

As for JB and the children, let's not forget when he cut off Josie's babble during that interview.

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Witsec7

I think they have a very symbiotic relationship, kinda like a lamprey on a shark.

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3 is enough
As for JB and the children, let's not forget when he cut off Josie's babble during that interview.

Oh he's far from perfect, but he's a better parent than Michelle, IMHO.

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Guest
I don't even like him a little bit. People like J-B are dangerous. He appears just stupid and nice enough for people to like him and feel sorry for him, but in reality, he's crazy like a fox. He's at the very least complicit in keeping all of his children from leading "normal" lives and denying them a decent education.

This. What I know of them is what they put out there, and while I think they are both to blame for the damage they have done to their kids, I think of the two of them he's the only one capable of stopping. Not that he will.

I think there is something very wrong with her. I'm not qualified to diagnose anyone, God knows, but I think she has some kind of mental health issue. Jim Bob on the other hand, seems to be enabling her problem because it's profitable.

I don't let her off the hook - adults need to take responsibilities for their problems before they bleed onto their kids.

If he loved her he wouldn't enable her pregnancy addiction. I thought these guys were supposed to protect their womenfolk? Why isn't he protecting her from the one thing most likely to kill her?

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Esther

I agree with all this. I wouldn't want anyone I care about marrying a guy like that (because let's not forget how crazy right-wing he is) but Michelle creeps me out WAY more. He may be an idiot, but I do think he cares more for the kids OR for her than she cares for the kids or him. I also don't blame him more than Michelle for the whole serial pregnancies catastrophe. It's pretty obvious that she is way into the attention too.

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ElphabaGalinda

JB is just as much to blame for risking Michelle, Josie and any other future JKid's health as Michelle is. He wants to have as many kids as possible and he doesn't care about the consequences. He may pay more attention to the kids than Michelle, but he still won't let them live anything other than the life he chooses. I feel much much more sad for Josie. What made the tiny bit of sadness i felt for him disappear was that i realized even though he has to know what happened to Josie is likely to happen again, if not worse, he's still going to try to have more kids.

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lexiloumarie

Jim Bob is like a 15 year old high school kid who when asked why he got his gf pregnant said "Because I love her, and she really wanted me to." Both of them have issues that they really need to address. Being co-dependent is just as unhealthy as being addicted to something.

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