That Wife Wanted a Cubic Z?

[Morton Fan]

Now, I am no elitist, and really don't think it's any of my business if someone wants a Cubic Zirconium wedding ring. However, I find it very strange that That Wife's latest post says,

"Fun fact: zirconia is the second hardest material we know of next to diamonds, and it happens to be the stone I considered having my engagement ring fashioned out of (then we found an antique one that I loved so I didn’t go with the zirconia)."

Not only is that not a very fun fact, but I love how she makes it sound so exotic. "Fashioned out of" Cubic Z, instead of "letting That Husband get off easy since he didn't really want to marry me anyway."

I don't think an engagement at ALL indicates someone's value or worth, but I do find it ironic since she has such expensive tastes elsewhere (with the exception of cribs for babies, that is).

[icecreamycakeycake]

Cubic zirconia (CZ) is a lab created stone used to simulate diamonds and other gemstones.

Not sure what she's talking about, there's no such thing stone as "zirconia".

Kthxbai from the resident FG Graduate Gemologist

[Kaylee]

Some people go with CZ because they want a large stone and because most people will assume it's a real diamond if it's in a wedding band. My sister did this on one of her marriages - she got a ring with a big CZ, with the intention being to replace it with a diamond later on when they could afford it better and to spend most of their money on getting a house instead.

[nimerha]

Kthxbai from the resident FG Graduate Gemologist

Hi hi hello there! An undergrad crystallographer here and slightly jealous I never get to work with the shiny stuff :)

That Bitch has shit for brains and no idea what the hell is she talking about. Yes, dear, and whilst you're at it, will you buy this piece of coal off me? It's EXACTLY like the stone on your engagement ring!

ETA: forgot to say, zirconia is actually a thing - a common name for ZrO2. You just don't often hear it.

[clibbyjo]

I think CZ is fine if the woman knows its CZ going in. If a man buys the CZ and pretends its real when he gives it to her unknowing, then I would have a problem.

Of course I don't even know where my engagement ring is right now so I would probably have been better off with CZ. :/

[DarkAnts]

Hi hi hello there! An undergrad crystallographer here and slightly jealous I never get to work with the shiny stuff :)

That Bitch has shit for brains and no idea what the hell is she talking about. Yes, dear, and whilst you're at it, will you buy this piece of coal off me? It's EXACTLY like the stone on your engagement ring!

Coal+ pressure= diamond. I am sure you can find someone to purchase it. Just tell them that they have to squeeze it for a long time. :whistle:

[PrincessOfSiam]

My mother was given a lovely pale natural zircon ring when she married my dad in 1938. She wore it day and night thru out their 70 years of marriage, and I have it today. It looks nothing like The CZs we see aroundntoday', and was considered an appropriate gift for a war-time bride to receive. It has held up beautifully with the exception of the gold band which has worn down as thing as tinsel. The stone itself is still pristine condition. I wonder if she wasn't really thinking of a natural zircon rather than lab-created CZ.

[haveapicniclife]

Didn't read her post, but a zircon is a natural stone occurning in many colors including colorless and is the second hardest substance next to diamonds. You generally don't see this stone as a diamond simulant.

Cubic zirconia (CZ) is a lab created stone used to simulate diamonds and other gemstones.

Not sure what she's talking about, there's no such thing as "zirconia".

Kthxbai from the resident FG Graduate Gemologist

Waving HI over here from a ring whore and former metalsmith. :D I spend way too much time on Pricescope and other jewelry boards (I don't actually own any super nice stones, but I do like to educate myself).

As for Thatwife, I don't think it's ironic. She likes to give out the impression that things are awesome, just look at all the pictures she takes of herself. It wouldn't shock me at all to find that she was passing off a cz as a diamond. I do like her antique ring though, it's pretty cool actually.

And before anyone gets offended at that, don't worry. I love well cut cz's and they're eco-friendly. I rock quite a few of them.

[smores]

Don't be so surprised. Over on the WB boards from which she came, people are always trying to one-up about how their rings didn't need to be expensive, blah blah blah, they're so non-traditional and better than you!

ETA the same crowd followed her to her blog, so it's still an "i'm better than you because I didn't NEED this" kind of post.

[haveapicniclife]

Don't be so surprised. Over on the WB boards from which she came, people are always trying to one-up about how their rings didn't need to be expensive, blah blah blah, they're so non-traditional and better than you!

ETA the same crowd followed her to her blog, so it's still an "i'm better than you because I didn't NEED this" kind of post.

You think? I don't know, there's a thread over there right now about how $10k is perfectly reasonable for a ring and how you shouldn't "cheap out" on something like that. :roll:

[Grace]

I requested, and received, a lab-created diamond as my engagement ring. I had several reasons: I'm very frugal, DaBeers & their false inflation of diamond values can kiss my @$$, and I didn't want to worry that some poor kid in an African mining village go their leg chopped off so I could wear a rock.

You can get a brilliant and clear stone for a fraction of the cost of a natural diamond of the same quality, which are actually not even as rare as some semi-precious stones but DaBeers keeps them locked in a cave or something and only trickles a few out a year to keep prices up, and I would always have been thinking of a tiny little foot laying in a field every time I looked at a real diamond on my hand.

Of course, the frugal portion sort of goes out the window when you have a man who feels the need to personally design your ring and have a local artist create it by hand. Crazy man. I think a person should get whatever kind of stone they want in their engagement ring. A good friend of mine in college chose an Aquamarine and loved it. Anne of Green Gables wore a "circlet of pearls." Laura Ingalls Wilder had a Garnet with a Pear on each side. ;)

[liltwinstar]

You think? I don't know, there's a thread over there right now about how $10k is perfectly reasonable for a ring and how you shouldn't "cheap out" on something like that. :roll:

Yeah, basically that site just has a lot of ring drama. Someone will start a "look at my tiny ring!" thread, then someone else will start a thread about how people judge her for having a big ring, then someone else will go on and on about blood diamonds, etc. It never ends.

Basically, I say - make a choice that makes you happy (if that's CZ, great, if that's a $10k bling fest, great) and then ignore people who judge.

But, that's my general opinion on all wedding stuff anyway :)

[haveapicniclife]

Well, I agree with you. :)

Yeah I spend a little too much time over there, mostly just looking at ring styles and trends. Some of those ladies get really nasty and snippy!

[Tanaqui]

You think? I don't know, there's a thread over there right now about how $10k is perfectly reasonable for a ring and how you shouldn't "cheap out" on something like that. :roll:

$10k?! Holy crap! I felt my $600 ring (50% off at a going-out-of-business sale) was extravagant! We have a 200 year old house that we're slowly remodeling, so I felt that our income would be better spent on new kitchen cabinets rather than ring payments. My mind boggles at dropping that kind of cash on a small piece of jewelry.

[donks]

Coal+ pressure= diamond. I am sure you can find someone to purchase it. Just tell them that they have to squeeze it for a long time. :whistle:

HEY! A new way for JimBoob to make $$$$, Fundy diamonds! A courting fundy couple selects a chunk of coal. Jim Boob then stuffs it up his ass for 6 months or so...In the week of the wedding, it is removed from the tightwads orifice and viola! Diamond! Quick trip to a pawnshop for a plain golden band from some other persons failed marriage (buy used, save the difference) and any jewelers can fix it up into a ring.

[icecreamycakeycake]

:o Ferfucksakes.... She's refering to a CERAMIC knife being made out of "Zirconia" (again, no such thing). The sharpening tool used to fashion blade might be inpregnated with zircon or something (I don't feel like researching this), but these are not expensive knives made of gemstone material. She's a terrible shill for this company. And an idiot.

OH, I looked for a pic of the "antique" ring, and couldn't find, could someone post a pic?

[icecreamycakeycake]

I requested, and received, a lab-created diamond as my engagement ring. I had several reasons: I'm very frugal, DaBeers & their false inflation of diamond values can kiss my @$$, and I didn't want to worry that some poor kid in an African mining village go their leg chopped off so I could wear a rock.

You can get a brilliant and clear stone for a fraction of the cost of a natural diamond of the same quality, which are actually not even as rare as some semi-precious stones but DaBeers keeps them locked in a cave or something and only trickles a few out a year to keep prices up, and I would always have been thinking of a tiny little foot laying in a field every time I looked at a real diamond on my hand.

Of course, the frugal portion sort of goes out the window when you have a man who feels the need to personally design your ring and have a local artist create it by hand. Crazy man. I think a person should get whatever kind of stone they want in their engagement ring. A good friend of mine in college chose an Aquamarine and loved it. Anne of Green Gables wore a "circlet of pearls." Laura Ingalls Wilder had a Garnet with a Pear on each side. ;)

Werd! If I ever bought another diamond, it would probably be synthetic.

[nimerha]

:o Ferfucksakes.... She's refering to a CERAMIC knife being made out of "Zirconia" (again, no such thing). The sharpening tool used to fashion blade might be inpregnated with zircon or something (I don't feel like researching this), but these are not expensive knives made of gemstone material. She's a terrible shill for this company. And an idiot.

Erm, she's actually right (or rather, wasn't lied to) about that. Zirconium dioxide, aka zirconia, is an [link=http://www.substech.com/dokuwiki/doku.php?id=zirconia_ceramics]industrially used ceramic[/link], and is the same chemical as cubic zirconia. It's however not a "stone", it's not "second hardest after diamonds", and I highly fucking doubt she'd have had a ring stone "fashioned out" of it, as this is its usual [link=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f0/Baddeleyite-md12a.jpg/240px-Baddeleyite-md12a.jpg]natural appearance[/link].

I wholeheartedly agree with your closing statement though.

[haveapicniclife]

I'm trying to find the picture of it. It's really modest, vintage, and she said it was about $850. I remember that the diamond is set on a big metal illusion head. She doesn't wear a wedding band because she was too cheap to have one custom made to fit. (edit- her words, not mine)

[haveapicniclife]

Here it is. I think it's pretty cool, actually.

http://gallery.weddingbee.com/photo/mrs ... ement-ring

[icecreamycakeycake]

Erm, she's actually right (or rather, wasn't lied to) about that. Zirconium dioxide, aka zirconia, is an [link=http://www.substech.com/dokuwiki/doku.php?id=zirconia_ceramics]industrially used ceramic[/link], and is the same chemical as cubic zirconia. It's however not a "stone", it's not "second hardest after diamonds", and I highly fucking doubt she'd have had a ring stone "fashioned out" of it, as this is its usual [link=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f0/Baddeleyite-md12a.jpg/240px-Baddeleyite-md12a.jpg]natural appearance[/link].

I wholeheartedly agree with your closing statement though.

Did not know that!

[FireIsCatching89]

Hmm, I'd probably insist on CZ or a less-expensive stone, becase, as has been previously stated, I am against the exploitation of African miners and blood diamonds. Also, I tend to be quite rough on my belongings and have no qualms getting messy, so everything I wear must keep up with my crazy.

I know my mom didn't even have an engagement ring, since she felt the practice was sexist (since men don't traditonally wear one), and my parents wear matching gold bands that look remarkably similar to the One Ring (LotR!). My mother owns no diamonds, for ethical reasons, and because she'd rather spend her money on more practical things, like a big down payment on a nice house or a quality car. Or my college tuition, apparently. (Though if spending a buttload of money on jewelry makes you happy, go for it! Just don't do it at the expense of other things.)

I also dislike really expensive engagement rings and other "wedding" jewelry, since it throws back to a time when that was a woman's only insurance against divorce or widowhood. I'd like to think that when I get married, I'd be capable of caring for myself, rather than living off the money of pawned jewelry.

[LucySnowe]

I had a rather quickie wedding (thank you, Tory immigration policies) and my husband had never expected to be married to anyone, ever, so he hadn't researched anything. When we were discussing the possibility of marriage, one of his fears was that he didn't have enough money to pay for an engagement ring. Because he'd somehow heard the 'two months salary' thing.

Leaving aside the fact that I don't ever want to own, much less wear, jewelry that I need to buy insurance for, I gently explained that this was propaganda by the diamond industry and I really didn't care how much it cost.

(Admittedly, if I'd had more time, I *might* have asked my mother if she had anything suitable - she'd made noises about resetting diamonds when my sister was engaged.)

All three of our rings are silver and cost us a combined total of around $70. I love both my rings, and love wearing them, and while I think every woman should have what makes her happy, I just do not get the whole 'very very expensive diamond' thing, especially with the ethical considerations.

[Clementine]

Why not just go for a plain gold wedding band if she can't afford a real gem? I wouldn't want to walk around with a fake bling on my finger, but I think that the old-fashioned plain wedding bands are quite lovely. That's the traditional engagement ring here - a plain gold band, same for him and her, and then she got an identical ring for the wedding.

For the tenth anniversary, it was a tradition to get a ring with a stone in it (most often not a diamond, but something cheaper like a blue topaz or a pearl) to place between the two gold rings.

How much do "normal" people (ie, not Kardashians or Trumps) actually spend on an engagement ring in the US?

[LucySnowe]

A very quick Google search for average ring cost gives figures from $1500 to $4000.

The Knot seems to have come up with $5200 but if that's a survey of people based on who use that website, then it's a self-selected group and I'd expect it skews much higher than a national average.

Also they say (from that survey) that the average groom takes 3 months to find the engagement ring. Ha. I would love to see how that time breaks down. (2 months 30 days ignoring the situation, 1 day frantically running around the mall...?)