where are all these porn "addicts?"

[snarkbillie]

If he's being caught 3-4 times per day then it seems he wants to be caught. You didn't mention whether they have children, but if they do how will your friend explain the situation when they "catch" Daddy in the act?

Addiction or not, it sounds like your friend has ample grounds for divorce.

TBH I think sh'e's trying to catch him. She talks about walking into the bathroom randomly to "see what he's doing". It's dysfunctional on both ends over there. She turned the data plan off on his smart phone so he couldn't get more porn that way, because before she did he was watching porn at work on his phone and masturbating in the bathroom there.

[Sax Russell]

The only people I know of who seem to have a problem with porn, are the ones who deem porn to be taboo.

I think for most teen boys (and girls too) viewing porn is a natural progression. When you think back to thirty years ago the closest thing to porn that boys saw was the ladies underwear pages of the clothing catalogue that many mothers had. If they were lucky they had an older brother who managed to get hold of a dog eared porn magazine which was passed around to all the teen boys. If they were REALLY lucky and had a VCR and their parents went out, they might be able to get hold of a dodgy, barely viewable VHS tape of some repeatedly copied 1970's porn film.

Haha, actually this stuff reminds me of Bill Bryson's book about growing up in the 1950s and 60s. All the teen boys then looked at porn too - they'd steal magazines from their dads and share magazines between them. I've seen dirty pictures and stories from the Victorian era, too.

Now there is porn at our fingertips with the internet. Should people be surprised that teens look at it? Hell no, porn has been around for centuries. Viewing it is a phase that most people go through and come through the other side. After a while it's pretty 'meh'. However if you forbid it, if you make it taboo, then you are going to see issues with it. It's a bit like masturbation; it isn't a problem unless YOU make it a problem.

As a former teenage guy myself, masturbation is really fun. And for me, that means thinking about naked women. For some folks, that means thinking about naked men. And, well, I have a device that gives me lots of visual (and textual) aids, of course I'm going to use it. If you're a teenage boy, you look at porn.

Now on the other hand, do I think that there has been some detrimental effects of porn on the general population - yes I do. But I don't think that it is the concept of porn per se that is causing the problem. It is what is IN the porn and the attitude that comes with it that is the problem.

I do not agree with what has become the sexualising of young girls. Really, do 9 year old girls need underwired bras? Do they need thongs? Do they need t-shirts with 'Future WAG' on them? Stuff like that makes me sick. I was given a small back of girls clothes the other day from a friend who has a daughter a couple of years older than mine. All things her daughter has outgrown. Most of the stuff was fine but in there was a T-shirt with Playboy and the logo on it. This was a t-shirt in size age 10 years. Are you kidding me? A Playboy t-shirt for a 10 year old girl? Needless to say it went in the bin.

You know, I simply don't remember all that stuff from when I was 9 or 10. (circa 2000) It's the parents who are buying all that, not the daughters. Change starts with the parents.

Someone else posted about how teen girls feel they have to have the 'porn actress look'. You go to any pub or club on a weekend and you see the girls there, bleach blonde hair, clouted in make-up, 6 inch high hooker shoes, skirts up to their arses etc. You can bet under all that there isn't a pubic hair in sight either. The 'must have' thing is boob implants - I really cannot understand why anyone would want a bag of silicon shoved in their tits just to attract men.

It's a dumb look, and let me assure you that not all men are attracted to it. If nothing else, there's an incredible amount of porn out there featuring women who look nothing like that. Also, I'm pretty sure most guys think boob implants are kind of a joke.

Guys, you want the vag, take it as it is.

Yeah, pretty much this.

[gilora]

TBH I think sh'e's trying to catch him. She talks about walking into the bathroom randomly to "see what he's doing". It's dysfunctional on both ends over there. She turned the data plan off on his smart phone so he couldn't get more porn that way, because before she did he was watching porn at work on his phone and masturbating in the bathroom there.

Wow, that's fucked up (no pun intended). On the one hand, she's barging in on him in the bathroom, but on the other, bathroom doors can be fitted with locks. Has your friend considered Al-Anon? Only she can decide whether to leave but they could help her establish some boundaries.

[Sola]

It's a dumb look, and let me assure you that not all men are attracted to it. If nothing else, there's an incredible amount of porn out there featuring women who look nothing like that. Also, I'm pretty sure most guys think boob implants are kind of a joke.

I'm not sure about most guys, but there is a sizeable percentage of guys like you, who think implants look foul. If most guys thought they were horrible, you wouldn't see so many women having them and wanting them. Women are having them because they think it will make them more attractive to guys, for the most part. But thankfully there are some guys who hate them.

My son is one of them - thank goodness! He's 16 and right slap bang in the middle of the wanking to porn years. Now I know full well that if I were to go to his room and take a look at what is on his computer, I am sure I would find porn! But we're pretty open in my family and one of the things he has expressed is that he prefers a girl to look less like a tart that most of the girls he knows. He says he prefers girls who don't wear ultra short skirts and have their boobs hanging out. I'm quite proud of his thinking with that, although on the other hand if some 'tart' (as he calls them) presented it on a plate in front of him, I am not naive enough to think he would turn it down! He is 16 after all!

[kittypie]

LOL!

Take your five inches of fury and hit the road!

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[clarinetpower]

I've heard from people in the hotel industry (*brings this back to the whole point of FJ*), that the highest rates of porn watching PPV at the hotels are during the conservative Christian events.

Sin in the camp, indeed.

[CynicMom]

You can get yaoi via peer to peer file sharing???? I NEED TO KNOW HOW YOU DO THIS.

I know a self-labeled "porn addict". He believes he is an addict because he feels compelled to look at it once a day. But not on the days he has sex or is sick or something. Did I mention he's a conservative christian or is that redundant?

[gilora]

I've heard from people in the hotel industry (*brings this back to the whole point of FJ*), that the highest rates of porn watching PPV at the hotels are during the conservative Christian events.

Sin in the camp, indeed.

I'm sure it's for research ... :whistle:

[CynicMom]

That "x-rated" logo of the two smiley faces where one has a question mark and the other gets red..... what the hell is that supposed to be?

[Clementine]

I've heard from people in the hotel industry (*brings this back to the whole point of FJ*), that the highest rates of porn watching PPV at the hotels are during the conservative Christian events.

Sin in the camp, indeed.

And the state where they consume most internet pornography in the US is - Utah. That news story even made it to the Swedish papers "Highest percentage of porn users in the Mormon state".

[Constance Vigilance]

My son is one of them - thank goodness! He's 16 and right slap bang in the middle of the wanking to porn years. Now I know full well that if I were to go to his room and take a look at what is on his computer, I am sure I would find porn! But we're pretty open in my family and one of the things he has expressed is that he prefers a girl to look less like a tart that most of the girls he knows. He says he prefers girls who don't wear ultra short skirts and have their boobs hanging out. I'm quite proud of his thinking with that, although on the other hand if some 'tart' (as he calls them) presented it on a plate in front of him, I am not naive enough to think he would turn it down! He is 16 after all!

I'm trying to find a nice way to say this, but your son is looking down on certain girls and calling them 'tarts' because of the way they dress and you are proud of him for it...? :?

[Jessica]

And the state where they consume most internet pornography in the US is - Utah. That news story even made it to the Swedish papers "Highest percentage of porn users in the Mormon state".

There is a talk about it at every single General Conference. It is constantly mentioned in regular church meetings and in the Ensign magazine. And if you see it once by accident, it will destroy your marriage forever. It's like that episode of Ren & Stimpy where Stimpy is put in charge of a button but told not to touch it, while someone is breathing down his neck and calling it a "shiny, red, CANNNDY-LIKE button!"... of course he's going to touch it! What do they expect?

[CanadianHippie]

I'm not sure about most guys, but there is a sizeable percentage of guys like you, who think implants look foul. If most guys thought they were horrible, you wouldn't see so many women having them and wanting them. Women are having them because they think it will make them more attractive to guys, for the most part. But thankfully there are some guys who hate them.

Women are having them done because the industry has convinced them that is what men find attractive. My experience has been that what men actually find attractive and what the industry claims is attractive are two different things.

[doggie]

Women are having them done because the industry has convinced them that is what men find attractive. My experience has been that what men actually find attractive and what the industry claims is attractive are two different things.

I agree. but porn boobs seeom to be about the worst quality large scars lousy shapes hard as rocks. very low end work. The same with super thin models. I don't think for the most part that is what guys want I have never met one who likes twiggy woman.

[Sola]

I'm trying to find a nice way to say this, but your son is looking down on certain girls and calling them 'tarts' because of the way they dress and you are proud of him for it...? :?

No, he isn't looking down on them. Not at all. He just doesn't like girls who dress like hookers and has no desire to date girls who dress like hookers. He prefers girls who are nerdy looking to girls who dress like they are one step away from a porn career (and of course that doesn't mean they are). Now bear in mind that where we live many of the girls are what we in the UK call 'chavy' and that he is an autistic 16 so his way of expressing himself isn't always what you would consider to be polite, although there is no intent to be impolite there. Most of the girls that he knows spend all their time talking about who they have slept with and who they are sleeping with next. He doesn't find that attractive and doesn't want to be with a girl who dresses like that or is fine with jumping into bed with whoever. His reasoning is (his words) that first off girls who look nerdy generally are nerdy, he is a nerdy boy and wants a girl who is like him. Second if a girl sleeps around she is more likely catch chlamydia (it's rampant among sexually active young adults est. to between 10 and 40% rates in the under 25's) which she might not know about and is less likely to be faithful. He doesn't look down upon them, not at all and yes I am proud of him because he considers a girl to be more than a sex object. We all have our personal preferences in the opposite sex; I prefer men with hairy chests, looking a little rugged and preferably dressed in jeans which emphasise a nice ass. Does that mean that I look down on men who are smooth, well groomed and dress in a suit? Hell no, to suggest that someone looks down on others just because those others don't display what that person considers to be sexually attractive is fucking ridiculous quite frankly.

[PBrooke]

As someone in her late 20s, I'm pretty sure I "came of age" during the boom of plastic surgery, shaving, etc. Now, growing up in swimsuit country shaving at least somewhat was the norm, and thought of as a practicality rather than an aesthetic choice. However, I can assure you I've never known a guy who would turn down a woman based on whether or not she was shaved. Nowadays I don't even shave my legs, because of a skin allergy. I asked my husband his thoughts and he flat-out laughed. "It's not like you take a survey before things get going," he said. "By the time you get to the actual vagina, I don't think a guy is going to turn back for hardly anything."

[camdendayton]

deleted b/c who cares :)