Question about the Duggars

[Guest LilaFowler]

Can a Duggar girl go to Jim Bob and express her desire for a husband? Or does she have to wait until Jim Bob decides it's time?

[deelaem]

She can probably subtly indicate she likes someone, but if anything is going to courtship, it has to come through JimBoob.

[xDreamerx]

I think it depends on if you have a nice father who is willing to consider your thoughts and feelings. (Unlikely, in most cases). I believe it goes like this: A boy approaches his own father and says he's thinking he could marry a girl. Boy's father approaches girl's father and they arrange it. Then if the boy is given the green light he proposes to the girl.

[O Latin]

Isn't there something in the Josh-and-Anna-get-engaged episode where Anna's father talks about how she thought Josh was "the one" and they all prayed about it long before Josh proposed?

I don't think most fundies have arranged marriages. I think it just looks that way because of the involvement of the fathers. I think most fathers, fundie or not, want their daughters to be happy and I don't think most of them would be likely to force their daughters into a marriage that they totally didn't want (obviously there are exceptions, such as Razing Ruth). I know I've read "courtship stories" where the girl wasn't interested in the guy and turned him down.

I don't know how, exactly, the Duggars do things, but I imagine if one of the girls felt a particular boy was "the one" and told her parents, she would be encouraged to pray about it and then wait and see what happens.

[Childless]

I have a hard time believing that Jim Bob and Michelle would let one of their J slaves leave. Who would take care of all the kids, clean the house, do all the home schooling, wash and fold laundry, cook meals, etc.?

[marmalade]

I think it depends on if you have a nice father who is willing to consider your thoughts and feelings. (Unlikely, in most cases). I believe it goes like this: A boy approaches his own father and says he's thinking he could marry a girl. Boy's father approaches girl's father and they arrange it. Then if the boy is given the green light he proposes to the girl.

Actually, all this goes on just to get them in the same room together to see if they're compatible. Then, like with Zach Bates, he asks his father if he can officially "court" the girl and her father AGAIN has to approve. He'll also have to formally ask Sarah's father for her hand when they're ready to get engaged. However, in their case, Kelly is indicating that won't be until Zach has finished "his college" whatever the fuck that means. They've never mentioned him taking classes, so I imagine he's going the College Minus route.

Back on topic, Anna met Smuggar, liked him and was told to pray, but she couldn't make a move or any indication that she liked him. G-d's will and all that.

[3 is enough]

God must be fed up with the Duggars' constant praying about every little decision.

I can just see it: "Seriously, Jim Bob??? I gave you free will and intelligence (you screwed that up on your own), and you STILL want to know if I think you should buy a USED HARP???? Come on!!! Don't you think I have more pressing matters on my plate?"

[xDreamerx]

As I like to say, God's busy. God has shit to do. There are wars and famine and disease. I think less fortunate people should come before me and my petty concerns in the God line.