Duggars weird incestuous fascination

[JesusFightClub]

My only rule is that I will not answer the door anything but fully clothed (if I am in pyjamas I will pull on a hoodie and tracksuit bottoms) because last time I was arrested it was at home and a girl likes to be prepared. (I am a bit paranoid about this.)

The idea that you can defraud family members is so sick and wrong. I can see not walking about naked because, basically, not everyone wants to see your genitalia. Not because it will fill them with lust, just because, like your arse, genitals are very useful but most people don't want to see them in detail unless they choose to.

[O Latin]

I always assumed the pajama thing was more about practicality. With that many kids, if they all come downstairs in their pajamas, it could be a hassle to get everyone back upstairs to get dressed. If they know the rule is to get dressed before they come downstairs, it's much simpler. Or I thought maybe they were trying to defy the stereotype of homeschoolers lazing around in their pajamas all day. This way they can say, "see, everyone is up and dressed right away. We have a productive schedule.

I almost always shower and get dressed right away when I get up, except for Saturdays and other assorted days off. I guess I'm paranoid that if I sit down with my coffee and computer first, I'll zone out and run out of time to get ready. I don't usually put my pajamas on until right before I go to bed, either, although that's usually because I get distracted and don't realize what time it is until I look up at the clock and go "Oh, shit, I need to get to sleep."

Am I the only one who finds it severely uncomfortable not to wear a bra? I sleep in my bra. I know you're supposed to let the girls free some of the time, but it's so uncomfortable to be without one that I can't sleep if I'm not wearing one.

[Sola]

Me too on all of that!

Heck half the time I get the car and unclip "the girls" free when I am on my way home! and its not unusual to find bra's strewn about in odd places from where I've taken them off and left them, lol!!!

LOL! Me too! I hate wearing bras and the moment I get in the house and I am staying in, the bra is unclipped, I pull the straps down my arms and over my hands, then whip the bra out from up one sleeve! Funny thing is my daughter has just started doing that. She's started wearing a bra a few months ago and hates them. As soon as she gets in from school she is asking me to unclip it and take it off the same way I whip mine off.

As for PJ's, at the weekends the kids and I never get dressed before lunchtime. I'm sat here now in my fleecy pj's and slippers. I wasn't allowed to do that as a kid, it just wasn't the done thing then. But I couldn't care less now to be honest. If we aren't going out I don't see a problem with lounging around in pj's. People find lounge pants/jogging bottoms acceptable, well pj's aren't that different to me.

[Daenerys]

Jim Bob keeps blabbering about their daughters attractiveness and how he wants their bodies to be covered all the time. Seems like there is nothing else on his mind. And promptly... seems like he's the only one they should be really hiding from. I gagged when they said how daddy loved their hair long and curly so they permed them for daddy. *GAH* Daddy wants his eyes pleased and his daughters body covered. He forces dress and hair codes on them. I gag and I shudder. He looks at his curly haired virgins who dress to pease the Lord and Daddy, and purrs. And I throw up.

Have you noticed how only Jinger is still rocking the permed look? Jill and Jessa seem to have dropped it in favour of curling irons... I don't know about Jana, we haven't seen her for months.

[alphaeta08]

Am I the only one who finds it severely uncomfortable not to wear a bra? I sleep in my bra. I know you're supposed to let the girls free some of the time, but it's so uncomfortable to be without one that I can't sleep if I'm not wearing one.

I have pretty small boobs, but I usually wear a sports bra all day, which sometimes leads to wearing it to bed. I used to always wear a sports bra to bed so I could just jump out of bed and be ready for the gym, but it's not a comfort thing. Actually, now that I think about it, I do sometimes wear one to bed when I feel fat and don't want to feel everything flopping around. :roll:

My family would be apparently be appalling to these people, since we all wear sweats (i.e. pajamas) like 95% of the time anyway. Not gonna lie, I wear sleeping attire unless I have to leave the house. :oops:

[virginmojito]

Have you noticed how only Jinger is still rocking the permed look? Jill and Jessa seem to have dropped it in favour of curling irons... I don't know about Jana, we haven't seen her for months.

AH, Jill Muffin! The ultimate indoctrinated fundie Angel! Ofcourse she will not drop the curls! She will hold them for Daddy! BTW your avatar is gorgeous. If that's you... wow. I'm crayzee jealous.

[bananacat]

I have gigantic breasts, like so big that I can't find a single bra in my size in any store, including department stores and lingerie stores. Yes, some women actually exist who are beyond DDD. Anyway, while I theoretically might find it comfortable to sleep in a great bra, I really have limited options when it comes to bras. So I take mine of as soon as I get home. Buying bras through mail order is a long, expensive, and tedious process. I've given up hope of finding a really great bra, and I've considered it a fantastic feat if I can find one that I can simply tolerate throughout the workday.

But I also change into pajamas as soon as I get home because of my cat. He's very affectionate and sheds a lot even though he's shorthair and I like to get several uses out of sweaters between washings if I can manage it. He doesn't like to sit on bare skin so I always wear something that comes down to my knees, but it's certainly not about some sense of modesty.

I'm also a night-showerer and I like to shower as early in the evening as possible after I've done everything outside that I need to do. It just doesn't feel right to me to put regular clothes back on after I get out, so it's straight to pjs. I also can't consider a weekend or vacation fully relaxing unless there is one day where I don't have to change out of pjs all day long (meaning that I don't have to leave my apartment at all).

[Antigone]

Just so gross (JimBob and the girls, their need to 'please' Daddy). growing up, my family was pretty modest but nothing extreme. I wore my dad's T-shirts for pajamas, he had cool shirts with cars and stuff on them, and all I had were Rainbow Brite nightshirts, LOL. As I got older I moved up to track pants and a T-shirt for bed, and still do, unless it's summer then screw it, back to the undies :)

Sev and I don't care if Sevy decides to run around naked. We only ask she wears undies if she wants to sit on the couch, or have her get dressed if company comes. We have little to no modesty in our house, lol.

[Daenerys]

AH, Jill Muffin! The ultimate indoctrinated fundie Angel! Ofcourse she will not drop the curls! She will hold them for Daddy! BTW your avatar is gorgeous. If that's you... wow. I'm crayzee jealous.

Hahaha no it's Daenerys Targaryen from Game of Thrones. I'd like to think we look a little alike, though...

I wonder if they got rid of the curls cus their hair was getting damaged? That would make sense why the youngest still has them as her hair wouldn't have had to endure the look for so long.

[freejoytoo]

I think it's creepy to think you can 'defraud' your brothers and sisters. None of us wander around naked or anything but my family wear our own pyjamas most of the morning if we don't have to go out. I also used to wear my pyjamas all day as a student in full view of my male housemates so God knows what the Duggars think of me. I don't wear a bra under them either - way too uncomfy! I couldn't sleep in one!

[AmyP]

I always assumed the pajama thing was more about practicality. With that many kids, if they all come downstairs in their pajamas, it could be a hassle to get everyone back upstairs to get dressed. If they know the rule is to get dressed before they come downstairs, it's much simpler. Or I thought maybe they were trying to defy the stereotype of homeschoolers lazing around in their pajamas all day. This way they can say, "see, everyone is up and dressed right away. We have a productive schedule.

I almost always shower and get dressed right away when I get up, except for Saturdays and other assorted days off. I guess I'm paranoid that if I sit down with my coffee and computer first, I'll zone out and run out of time to get ready. I don't usually put my pajamas on until right before I go to bed, either, although that's usually because I get distracted and don't realize what time it is until I look up at the clock and go "Oh, shit, I need to get to sleep."

Am I the only one who finds it severely uncomfortable not to wear a bra? I sleep in my bra. I know you're supposed to let the girls free some of the time, but it's so uncomfortable to be without one that I can't sleep if I'm not wearing one.

I try to get everyone dressed right away for this reason. I don't have a ton of kids, but even with three it is can be a bit of a headache to get them all dressed. And yeah, we homeschool and I try not to let them do school in jammies and only get dressed if we have to go somewhere. One time I had a non-lifethreatening emergency and had to call the fire department in the middle of the day. I was really glad my kids and I were dressed. It just looks better and more productive that way.

[Deleted03]

But I also change into pajamas as soon as I get home because of my cat. He's very affectionate and sheds a lot even though he's shorthair and I like to get several uses out of sweaters between washings if I can manage it. He doesn't like to sit on bare skin so I always wear something that comes down to my knees, but it's certainly not about some sense of modesty.

I kinda do that except I once went to by 4 yoga pants and I have old long sleeve tshirts that I wear at home to limit white hair all over me. Of course I bought the yoga pants all black so after 3 hours they look pretty disastrous (I did not have my cat at the time of purchase lol) My grandma calls it putting on "civil" clothes (vs military proper clothes, just hinting at military not saying we wear military clothing. Damn it's hard to convey meaning)

[Rachel333]

I had a friend who had to get approval from her brother if her mother thought her shirt might be too tight. I guess the logic was that her brother knew best what would make a teenage guy "stumble". I thought it was super creepy, but there was still no question that her brother might be attracted to her. That's just not normal, and the only time I have ever heard of fundies thinking that was in that stupid modesty survey.

[Mamajane]

wth this is crazy....not being able to walk around in your pjs is INSANE. They obviously never have lazy days where you stay in your pjs a little longer at the duggar house....what a shame, those were some of my favorite days with my siblings while growing up :(

[SquirrelySquirrel]

I guess this is what you get when you raise your little boys to believe they are sexual beasts who won't be able to control themselves if they are exposed to a kneecap, and raise your girls to believe they are inviting an attack -and it will BE THEIR FAULT- if they show a kneecap. It really is sick. I don't know any pre-pubescent kids who worry about modesty and they'd be baffled if someone told them they should, especially in their own homes. I'll never understand why the super-modest fundies think we are the ones who are obsessed with sex when they are the ones who turn innocent kids into sexual creatures. It's fucking gross.

[CC3]

Growing up, we wore anything we liked on the weekends. Mom said we needed to be dressed by noon. My parents would walk around in their underwear and it wasn't considered unusual to us. My own kids were kind of funny. My daughter was born extremely modest. No tank tops, low cut tops, no shorts and she made up her own swimwear. It could have passed for "modest wear." I tried to convince her to let loose a little but she is still the same although she would wear pjs as a little girl with a robe on Sat. mornings. My son was the opposite. I was constantly after him to get dressed and stay dressed. I have always worn flannel pjs even in the summer and my husband will walk around in his underwear. I think all of us decided what was appropriate for ourselves and didn't worry too much about what others in the family thought. It was a non-issue.

edited for spelling

[freejoytoo]

I guess this is what you get when you raise your little boys to believe they are sexual beasts who won't be able to control themselves if they are exposed to a kneecap, and raise your girls to believe they are inviting an attack -and it will BE THEIR FAULT- if they show a kneecap. It really is sick. I don't know any pre-pubescent kids who worry about modesty and they'd be baffled if someone told them they should, especially in their own homes. I'll never understand why the super-modest fundies think we are the ones who are obsessed with sex when they are the ones who turn innocent kids into sexual creatures. It's fucking gross.

It's seriously sick that they think a three-year-old needs to understand modesty. When I was three it was still okay for me to run around the house naked. I don't understand how fundies don't calculate that nudity =/= being sexual and it is even worse that they think that applies to children. I'm all for children understanding the facts of life but that is NOT the same as thinking that knowing that will lead them into tempting their siblings or something. Ugh. I feel sick now.

[snarkykitty]

I always assumed the pajama thing was more about practicality. With that many kids, if they all come downstairs in their pajamas, it could be a hassle to get everyone back upstairs to get dressed. If they know the rule is to get dressed before they come downstairs, it's much simpler. Or I thought maybe they were trying to defy the stereotype of homeschoolers lazing around in their pajamas all day. This way they can say, "see, everyone is up and dressed right away. We have a productive schedule.

I almost always shower and get dressed right away when I get up, except for Saturdays and other assorted days off. I guess I'm paranoid that if I sit down with my coffee and computer first, I'll zone out and run out of time to get ready. I don't usually put my pajamas on until right before I go to bed, either, although that's usually because I get distracted and don't realize what time it is until I look up at the clock and go "Oh, shit, I need to get to sleep."

Am I the only one who finds it severely uncomfortable not to wear a bra? I sleep in my bra. I know you're supposed to let the girls free some of the time, but it's so uncomfortable to be without one that I can't sleep if I'm not wearing one.

I had a friend in HS who slept in her bra. I take mine off whenever possible. I have edema issues which makes anything I wear (especically underwires) dig into my skin, even if they weren't bugging me when I put it on. I also feel claustrophobic with bras on when I am coughing and doing airway clearance. If you cough 50 times a day, you'd notice how uncomfortable it can be, too! Of course, if I leave the house or have company over, I always put one on.

[SimplyMe]

I find it just plain weird and creepy too. My kids generally come down for breakfast in their pjs and then go upstairs to get dressed. If we have nowhere to be on a day off or Saturday morning, we'll stay in our pjs all morning. Right now since it's cold, my kids are usually in footie pjs or flannel pjs, how on earth is that defrauding?! Some of my favorite times are Friday nights when we all get in our jammies and cuddle on the couch to watch a movie. I wonder if they consider cuddling to be defrauding? Do the Duggar boys ever just get to cuddle with their Mama? If not, they are all missing out on special times- as a mom, I find nothing more special than when I cuddle with my kids and they fall asleep.

The whole obsession these fundie men have with modesty makes me think they have serious issues themselves with "impure thoughts." The concern they have with their daughters defrauding them or their own brothers is downright creepy and disgusting. I wonder if JB had such thoughts about his own mother and sister. I think the sexual repression in these groups probably does lead to deviate thoughts or behaviors, even about one's own sisters or mother.

[SimplyMe]

My only rule is that I will not answer the door anything but fully clothed (if I am in pyjamas I will pull on a hoodie and tracksuit bottoms) because last time I was arrested it was at home and a girl likes to be prepared. (I am a bit paranoid about this.)

Uh, this comment kind of took me aback- do you get arrested often? I don't like to answer the door in my pjs because I'm embarrassed, especially if it's late in the day, I feel like a lazy slug- but, I'd never be thinking that I should be dressed in case I get arrested. You have to commit a crime to be arrested, something most of us avoid. What have you been arrested for?

[JesusFightClub]

Er, sorry, I forgot how that sounds! No, being arrested is not part of my daily, weekly or yearly life ;) (Bloody hell, I have a tin ear when it comes to appropriateness).

In my bad luck I opened a door on police who detained me (I had rather not say the charge, but I was innocent of it.) After the fact of being detained at home I was really jumpy about answering the door for ages - for a while I wouldn't, and now I will but must be clothed. I am a law abiding type as a rule, so I never expected that, and for a while I was really worried it would happen again.

[Conuly]

You have to commit a crime to be arrested, something most of us avoid.

Or it could be a mistake. Or it could be a crime, but not something most of us would consider terribly bad - my brother-in-law once had the cops come to his door because he'd avoided jury duty one too many times (in his defense, our mail service is so notoriously poor that it's entirely possible that the summons never arrived in the mailbox), and yes, they dragged him in over that.

Here in NYC it's well-known that the cops have a quota. It's very easy to get arrested for sitting on your own stoop drinking a beer (a crime that at the start of the month or in richer neighborhoods gets the cops to remind you to go inside to drink) or for walking through an unlocked park at 9:15 PM when the park officially closes at 9. And of course the end result is that most of these cases result in absolutely nothing because they're so STUPID, it's just a big waste of money on the part of the city.

[jenny_islander]

I hope that the ban on pajamas is just another one of those neurotic fundamentalist rules about appearance--you know, "Don't show up for breakfast in your PJs because our viewers might think we sit around watching godless TV shows in them" or something. But I fear that it is about little girls defrauding their own kinfolk. Have they explained why they have this ban?

[pixydust]

My own kids were kind of funny. My daughter was born extremely modest. No tank tops, low cut tops, no shorts and she made up her own swimwear. It could have passed for "modest wear." I tried to convince her to let loose a little but she is still the same although she would wear pjs as a little girl with a robe on Sat. mornings. My son was the opposite. I was constantly after him to get dressed and stay dressed. I have always worn flannel pjs even in the summer and my husband will walk around in his underwear. I think all of us decided what was appropriate for ourselves and didn't worry too much about what others in the family thought. It was a non-issue.

Whoa, creepily similar to us! My daughter (6) is pretty modest, she will wear tanks, shorts, and bathingsuits, but is very paranoid about her chest (I think it's because mine is big) and she wears a cami under all of her shirts. She also worries about pantylines and her undies being exposed in any way (over the top of her pants or even while I'm folding laundry!) my youngest son is happiest just in his underwear, he'd be nearly naked 24/7 if I let him, but I don't keep the house warm enough for that, so he has to wear clothes! My hubby wears his boxers around the house, and I'm in PJs by 8:30 (put the littles to bed at 8 and jump in the shower!)

Oh, for the bra survey: I have DDD's and I hate going without a bra! My back hurts if I don't wear one, sometimes I even put one back on after my shower if I'm going to be up doing stuff, but I take is off for bed - I really don't want to be jabbed by an underwire in my sleep! And when it comes to what I sleep in, either a tank top and undies or a tank and PJ pants, if I'm cold.

[Sunnichick31]

It's seriously sick that they think a three-year-old needs to understand modesty. When I was three it was still okay for me to run around the house naked. I don't understand how fundies don't calculate that nudity =/= being sexual and it is even worse that they think that applies to children. I'm all for children understanding the facts of life but that is NOT the same as thinking that knowing that will lead them into tempting their siblings or something. Ugh. I feel sick now.

I do agree that a family being obsessed with a 3 year olds modesty is a little incestuous, but I do think they should be taught some modesty. For example, when I was a little girl, my mother would always have to remind me to "sit like a lady" when I was wearing skirts, meaning that I had to remember to not sit in such a way that my panties would be exposed to the world (I always prefered to sit like a pretzal, if you know what I mean). I don't see a problem with something like that, but teaching a little kid that someone could be lusting after them if they forget to sit properly or if they are wearing the wrong kind of pajamas is absurd (I was never taught that, thank God!)