and God said... Let there be HAM!

[clibbyjo]

I enjoy a good ham. Particularly with a brown sugar,clove and mustard crust.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

I enjoy a good ham. Particularly with a brown sugar,clove and mustard crust.

Indeed. We have ham (purchased with money that I, a woman, earned in outside wages, ZOMG) left over from a big one last weekend, we've been enjoying having it in soup, and with beans and ham, and on biscuits, and just plain, ham is a good thing.

[Buzzard]

The next day Daddy called from work and said that our cousin had called him and asked if we could use a ham. Someone had given him a big one and he said it would take him and his son way too long to eat all of it Daddy told him we could definitely use it and called me to let me know that our cousin was going to be dropping it off.

I think she missed god's point and failed the test. Her cousin (a relative obviously) had a ham that was big enough to feed her entire family AND his. He is clearly alone with a single child - since the comment is that it would take him and the son too long to eat it with no mention of other family members. The "christian" thing to do would have been to INVITE YOUR RELATIVES TO DINNER YOU DUMB FUCK! This wasnt just a "free" ham, it was an opportunity to share the holiday with relatives. They probably were only offering the ham to get the invite.

FAIL

[Deleted07]

I think she missed god's point and failed the test. Her cousin (a relative obviously) had a ham that was big enough to feed her entire family AND his. He is clearly alone with a single child - since the comment is that it would take him and the son too long to eat it with no mention of other family members. The "christian" thing to do would have been to INVITE YOUR RELATIVES TO DINNER YOU DUMB FUCK! This wasnt just a "free" ham, it was an opportunity to share the holiday with relatives. They probably were only offering the ham to get the invite.

FAIL

EXCELLENT point!

[Sinister Rouge]

I know right, I was just sitting here reading it mouth agape, like really? really!? they seriously believe that God goes to the trouble of feeding their family with a huge assed Ham, when there are children STARVING in the world!?! If thats God he can suck it.

I've been thinking lately that it seems pretty easy to believe God controls the minutae of your life when life is 'good'; when you're sheltered, healthy, and with access to resources which provide anything you need, why not believe that it's because you've earned his blessings through your faith? The children are starving because of SIN. That baby has leukemia because of SIN. Live a godly life and you get health and ham.

Ignorant mothafuckas are ignorant.

[Guest Anonymous]

I enjoy a good ham. Particularly with a brown sugar,clove and mustard crust.

Have you tried injecting the mustard/sugar solution into the ham while it bakes?

Must admit, I stole the idea from the Maxwell blog and it was delicious! I added a tablespoon of orange juice to equal portions of brown sugar and Dijon mustard and used a cheapy culinary syringe that I bought on ebay. :D

[clibbyjo]

Have you tried injecting the mustard/sugar solution into the ham while it bakes?

Must admit, I stole the idea from the Maxwell blog and it was delicious! I added a tablespoon of orange juice to equal portions of brown sugar and Dijon mustard and used a cheapy culinary syringe that I bought on ebay. :D

I am totally doing that next year! I have a syringe from my Cajun Injector kit. :)

[fundiefan]

My family has been injecting turkeys and hams since I was a kid. I am glad those who didn't know before discovered it. At least the Maxwells served some purpose.

As for the miraculous ham...the crazy makes me cringe. Do they honestly, thoroughly and completely believe that god drew a line through the word 'ham' on the list...and are they that gullible that a crossed off item just won't be bought? If god took a day off from the Maxwells to give the family of the seven sisters a free ham, I can only say I am grateful he/she/it is not my god.

I've forgotten things at the store for big meals/parties/events and things worked out anyway. It isn't god. It isn't a miracle or divine. It just is. When I forgot mayo, when we had subs for a football party, a friend just * happened* to bring mayo. Did god do that, for this heathen to make MY football party a success, or did the friend use her brain and know that cold sandwiches need something and she has a preference for mayo over low fat or Miracle Whip?

God doesn't fucking care what your dinner menu is. And, I've said this often, but seriously; if there is a god and he/she/it cares about your menu or your transmission or your weather, that is not a god I want or need anything to do with.

[Guest Anonymous]

I am totally doing that next year! I have a syringe from my Cajun Injector kit. :)

It's fabulous - I should add though, after the first injection of 'raw' solution, I thereafter injected the mixture from the bottom of the baking pan - the mustard/sugar/juices/fat all mixed together. My kit is actually all plastic, so the 'needle' is all bent out of shape after syringing hot fat through it. I have a separate 'sweet' syringe which I use to inject jam into doughnuts and chocolate into muffins. :D

[Sinister Rouge]

It's fabulous - I should add though, after the first injection of 'raw' solution, I thereafter injected the mixture from the bottom of the baking pan - the mustard/sugar/juices/fat all mixed together. My kit is actually all plastic, so the 'needle' is all bent out of shape after syringing hot fat through it. I have a separate 'sweet' syringe which I use to inject jam into doughnuts and chocolate into muffins. :D

Mainlining ham juice... sounds very Homer Simpson :lol:

[dramallama]

So, does God take requests? Is it HAMS HAMS HAMS ALL HAMS ALL THE TIME or can I get some chicken & dumplings? I guess I'd take a ham if that's all he's got, but I'd prefer the chicken & dumplings.

[Sola]

Man, you guys are seriously a bunch of bitches who have too much time on your hands. No matter what you think of their religion, they seem like genuinely nice girls who are thankful for what they have (which is a lot more than I can say for most of you). Seriously, how about turning off your computers, and taking a walk and making eye contact with real people. Your forum was interesting for a while, especially about the Duggars and Bates, but I feel pretty bad about myself when I read some of the drivel you all type here and try to pass off as "wit". BTW- you have all confirmed what I always believed about atheists. Have fun bitching, I won't be reading.

Well bless your heart!

[Sola]

I enjoy a good ham. Particularly with a brown sugar,clove and mustard crust.

Ah this^ I do a brown sugar and mustard ham every Christmas. It's lush, never tried putting cloves in though, I might try that.

[Deleted07]

So, does God take requests? Is it HAMS HAMS HAMS ALL HAMS ALL THE TIME or can I get some chicken & dumplings? I guess I'd take a ham if that's all he's got, but I'd prefer the chicken & dumplings.

Yeah if he takes request I would like to win on the Lottery!!! :dance:

[Cerysbell]

I did ham in coke this year, with a mustard, sugar and clove glaze and almost had to lock it up to keep my headship and children om eating it before It was needed.

Are these the same girls who took flowers from a roadside memorial recently? They do seem incredibly naive.

[Guest Anonymous]

Man, you guys are seriously a bunch of bitches who have too much time on your hands. No matter what you think of their religion, they seem like genuinely nice girls who are thankful for what they have (which is a lot more than I can say for most of you). Seriously, how about turning off your computers, and taking a walk and making eye contact with real people. Your forum was interesting for a while, especially about the Duggars and Bates, but I feel pretty bad about myself when I read some of the drivel you all type here and try to pass off as "wit". BTW- you have all confirmed what I always believed about atheists. Have fun bitching, I won't be reading.

Don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out.

[Dinorah]

I always find it odd when God supposedly provides fundies with trivial things like hams or cameras.

It's also basically a great way of entirely by-passing someone's generosity.

[pixydust]

I always find it odd when God supposedly provides fundies with trivial things like hams or cameras.

It's also basically a great way of entirely by-passing someone's generosity.

That's what bothers me sooo much! I've mentioned it in a post before, but as a teen I made dinner for my family almost every night. I never got a "thank you", but we prayed before eating and thanked God for it! He didn't make it, I did, and all I got were the complaints!

[daharyn]

Are these the same girls who took flowers from a roadside memorial recently? They do seem incredibly naive.

Did they really? This horrifies me. Anyone got a link for this one?

[formergothardite]

Did they really? This horrifies me. Anyone got a link for this one?

No, those were different girls.

[donks]

I'm baking a big ol' ham today, but I had to buy mine. Guess their god doesn't like me enough to give me a damn ham...

[Nothing2CHere]

The next day Daddy called from work and said that our cousin had called him and asked if we could use a ham. Someone had given him a big one and he said it would take him and his son way too long to eat all of it Daddy told him we could definitely use it and called me to let me know that our cousin was going to be dropping it off.

My in-laws live relatively close to me & hubby, and every few weeks will call us to say something like, "We're making beef stew, and it's way too much for just the two of us, would you like to take some home?" I never realized it was God making them make too much stew so that hubby & I could also partake. I just assumed it was his parents' inability to think to freeze leftovers for later the way my family always does.

[Terrie]

Ah, the Christmas Ham. Totally pagan in origin. :) As such, it obviously came from Satan, not God.

[donks]

Did they really? This horrifies me. Anyone got a link for this one?

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=5611

[Witsec7]

Ah, the Christmas Ham. Totally pagan in origin. :) As such, it obviously came from Satan, not God.

Yea my comment to them about the ham not being kosher died a moderated death.