Craziest statement/judgement/scolding you heard from a Fundy

[adidas]

We were having a tough time financially because we were using contraception. If we became quiverfull God would give us more money as we had more children.

[Iamthatbean]

I was told I was the "antichrist".

Why? because they said homosexuality was an abomination. When i pointed out that so was shrimp, pork and cheeseburgers, they fired back with "YOU ARE THE ANTI-CHRIST".

This was also from a person who made Dna's spelling look good. Seriously, every other word was misspelled, and she rambled. I wonder now if it was the famous Taryn.....

THIS. Also, someone (not knowing I was gay) said that gay people were exactly the same as atheists. And, my family regularly refers to my church as the "gay demon church".

[RGSG99]

My husband and I were told that we could never be saved unless we divorced each other and went back to our first spouses.

[Crackedeggs]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Alecto)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[MerryHappy]

My husband was told he was gay because a leader in the fundie church we were attending was having gay sex dreams about him.

I had a pastor/evangelist try to cast demons out of me for making eye contact with him.

[Cran]

I was told by a priest in the confessional that he wouldn't absolve me of my sins if I wouldn't promise to never cut myself again because my urge to cut was only a temptation of the devil and no illness/mental problem.

This sounds not so crazy at first, but it is. You can't just stop cutting (self harming), it is like telling someone with depression to stop being depressed.

[Boltingmadonna]

Don't know whether to laugh or cry . . . . This thread fills me with unholy glee because at least I wasn't the only one. But it also makes me so very sad because no one should have to put up with this kind of verbal bullying.

Don't know if this is THE worst thing anyone ever said to me, but I was told by my "spirit-filled" Catholic leader that I didn't have real femininity because I was "warped" as a result of my upbringing. Mind you, he didn't mean the part of my upbringing that involved being hit, screamed at, bullied and dominated by my father. He meant the good parts, where I was encouraged to express my talents, study hard, and be brilliant in school. This had made me too independent and self-willed to be a good woman, apparently.

Oh, and I was also told that if a baby squirmed while having his diaper changed, I should spank him with a wooden spoon or other "rod." "You have to break his rebellious little spirit," said the leader, while smiling inappropriately. Even in my brain-washed state, I totally rejected this notion. Thank FSM.

[Iamthatbean]

Don't know whether to laugh or cry . . . . This thread fills me with unholy glee because at least I wasn't the only one. But it also makes me so very sad because no one should have to put up with this kind of verbal bullying.

Don't know if this is THE worst thing anyone ever said to me, but I was told by my "spirit-filled" Catholic leader that I didn't have real femininity because I was "warped" as a result of my upbringing. Mind you, he didn't mean the part of my upbringing that involved being hit, screamed at, bullied and dominated by my father. He meant the good parts, where I was encouraged to express my talents, study hard, and be brilliant in school. This had made me too independent and self-willed to be a good woman, apparently.

Oh, and I was also told that if a baby squirmed while having his diaper changed, I should spank him with a wooden spoon or other "rod." "You have to break his rebellious little spirit," said the leader, while smiling inappropriately. Even in my brain-washed state, I totally rejected this notion. Thank FSM.

Actually, come to think of it, the worst thing I was ever told was that my daughter (who died at birth) was in hell because babies are born sinful and that is why they cry. I was also told to take my son off his meds and trust God to heal him because medicating a violent, autistic child with PTSD and other severe issues was like "putting a bandaid on cancer". And I was given 3 books, told they would teach me how to really parent. The Pearls and Dr. Dobson...blech

[kayray]

Despite living in a fundie laden area right now, growing up I did not and did not really hear too much. While I knew of some fundies, I lived in a pretty liberal/leftist area. It was more anything goes and live and let live. However, I have been told over the interwebz a few times that I was going to hell for reading Harry Potter, practicing yoga, for having a gay brother (he of course, was also going to hell), for being pro-choice, a feminist, and for having pre-marital sex.

I do joke around with a few of the more liberal Mormons I know that I won't be getting my own planet (nor will my husband) though since we are childfree and not breeding our own kingdom. Some of them sort of buy into it, but not in a way where they cannot also make light of it. I did get the stare down (along with a couple other women) at a wedding a few years ago with the bride's family - they were all very fundie Mormon's and objected to us more liberal women just for the mere fact we were more liberal (the irony was it was a shotgun wedding, with the bride a few months pregnant).

Where I live now, just due to the nature of my job and other positions in the community, I am cautious with people I do not know or new clients. I already hear some stuff from non-fundies/fundie lights since I have not and am not having kids, etc since I am failing in my duty as the owner of a uterus, apparently. It is a very conservative and fundie area, and due to my aforementioned job and other positions, it is best to keep those things to close friends or live with my heathen life privately with my husband. I do not hide my opinions or beliefs, but I do respect time and place for them.

[ukjingernut]

This thread is so sad. So many heart-breaking stories... particularly Alecto's assault.

I was told that I was demon possessed. So many times and so many reasons. But it was when I was told that my demon possession was behind my father's running off with another women that I got very angry and refused to accept any more of it. Any moron who knew the story could have seen that my father made a very clear and deliberate choice in what he did.

[latraviata]

Five years ago a pastor told me that he "knew my kind", and that within just a few minutes of meeting me he knew what my problem was. He then proceeded to "invite" me to repent of said sin. The sin? In his words, my biggest problem was that I "had arrogantly become educated beyond my level of obedience". "Educated beyond your obedience"?!? WTF does that even mean? It's a sin to learn to think? I still don't really get it.

Anyway, it made me want to ask other FJers now- what's the craziest/most brazen statement a Fundy has made to you?

Edited to add: What exactly is the cut off for education before it interferes with your obedience? College? Third Grade?

One of Zsu's followers told me that the death of my younger son (28) should tell me something, she meant for being an atheist.

[debrand]

Once at the playground, I started up a conversation with a woman that I vaguely knew. My son walked up and showed her child his Mighty Max. This toy was a strange head shaped thing that you could open up to see a minature scene that came with a tiny figurine to play with. My son loved those things. The woman told me in the most condescending tone ever that Christians would not let their children play with gross toys(the toy was not gross)

A woman frighted our neighbor's son by telling him that Satan was going to suck the soul out of our daughter because she wore black.

I was told numerous times that if I would just trust Jesus and tithe all my money problems would disappear.

Oh my goodness, I keep remembering more

My son's Sunday School teacher told me not to let my son bring cards to church. This wasn't because he was being a distraction. He would play with the older boys after church. Members in my church were upset at the thought that kids would play card games, at all.

My son once showed the pastor a fantasy game. We got a lecture about how such games are evil.

[jenny_islander]

Oh, yeah, I got that all the time. I have been a D&D player since sixth grade. I had one girl tell me she couldn't play with me because that evil game taught actual magic. Her parents said so. If anyone, anywhere, had ever gotten even a low-level D&D spell to work in real life, you think somebody would've noticed! But fundamentalists have no idea how games of pretend work. Which is funny because they make up stories and pass them around all the time. No, on second thought it's not funny at all. Fundamentalist leaders find it convenient for their followers to never learn rational thought (because it leads to Godless science donchaknow and never mind that Christian doctors were its great proponents for centuries). Not being able to stop and think, "But wait . . . if magic really worked, I would see people flying everywhere" means that the follower will swallow any old crap. Train up your child in the way your leader thinks he should go, and he will become a useful idiot.

My husband was told he was gay because a leader in the fundie church we were attending was having gay sex dreams about him.

Classic! "I am one of the Good, Decent People. Therefore, I never sin. Therefore, somebody else is doing this to me." (Leaving out the question of whether having gay sex dreams is sin at all, which, no.)

I had a pastor/evangelist try to cast demons out of me for making eye contact with him.

Also classic! "If a woman exists in a way I don't like, there is something wrong with her." Of course this is part of our overall culture, but don't fundamentalists just pile it on?

[Cran]

Oh, I forgot, the same priest who refused to absolve me also said women couldn't be altar servers because their menstrual blood makes them spiritually unclean. WTF.

(Women are allowed to serve at the altar if the priest whom they are serving is ok with it, so they can't really be that unclean, can they?!)

[jenny_islander]

Oh, right, forgot this one: I was selling raffle tickets door to door to raise money for a class trip. I had one lady SA-LAM the door in my face because "We are CHRISTIANS and CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME!!!"

1. It's not a quote from the Bible. It's Dickens.

2. Here is the full quote: "Charity begins at home, and justice begins next door."

[GatorGutCasserole]

'You'll go to hell for visiting a Buddhist temple' - my former adult entertainer grandmother when I talked to her about my new life in southeast asia. The last time I heard her voice.

[Burris]

My son once showed the pastor a fantasy game. We got a lecture about how such games are evil.

They fear fantasy (e.g., Harry Potter, D&D, video games) even while counseling their followers to ignore pressing realities (such as overpopulation and climate change). Myopic. Stupid.

They also lie - a lot. Their sheeple are easily fooled by bullshit and yet skeptical of science (except for pseudo-science which is, like, totally legit merely by virtue of its having been rejected by the same evil, scheming authorities who recognize the Earth is billions of years old and that our ancestors evolved).

[TinyDancer87]

Just yesterday, my mother-in-law told me of how our "brothers" of our church in Mexico are telling women that boots are pagan and they are forbidden to wear them.

In this part of south Mexico, it is very cold in the winter because they are in the mountains. Women not wearing boots is completely un-biblical, and it's just another way to have dominion over women, making silly rules.

Needless to say, I'm wearing boots right now, and the temp outside is only about 60 degrees F. I am the sin in the camp :twisted:

[keen23]

Not fundy, but my husband's very Irish Catholic family still refuses to acknowledge our marriage. Since we weren't married in a Catholic Church (duh, I'm not Catholic), it's "not a real marriage" and our children aren't acknowledged because of they are "bastards born out of wedlock." One of his Aunts goes so far to allow only my husband into her house if he wants to visit his grandmother (she's 98 now)- she physically blocked my then 3 year old from entering the house the last time he tried to visit. That was 5 years ago, and he's refused to attempt a visit since.

[AnnoDomini]

Keen23, ugh! Sorry your relatives can't just celebrate love.

My parents refused to attend a number of weddings in the family and our then-church. They were polite enough to the couples (I think) but they told us they were refusing to acknowledge the marriage as legit since the bride or groom had divorce in their past therefore they were still married to their original spouses and thus were 'committing adultery in the eyes of God' with their new marriage.

[GenerationCedarchip]

We had a guest speaker at the young women's circle on the fundie-farm once who told us about how she and her boyfriend were sinful and had sex before they were married. She was then infertile for 5 years before having a child with very severe mental retardation/developmental delay issues. She told us that things like this happened because of God's judgment on sexual sins in our lives. She then told us similar stories that happened to others she knew. To the church's credit, the pastor publicly apologized to the congregation for having this speaker but hearing these stories really messed with my mind for a while.

And then there was the Sunday school teacher who told us that if we played D&D, we'd get schizophrenia. :o

[Sola]

One of Zsu's followers told me that the death of my younger son (28) should tell me something, she meant for being an atheist.

I remember that! They pretty much said that god punished your atheism by taking your son away.

[GatorGutCasserole]

One of Zsu's followers told me that the death of my younger son (28) should tell me something, she meant for being an atheist.

:shock: I would have punched her right in her hepatitis.

[Deleted07]

gah, this all just makes my blood boil. Even if say for a minute we believe that God exist and he is this vengeful, ludicrously judgmental presence that only wants to punish our free will by giving us illness or taking anything good away from our lives... I'm sure most of us would say a big 'screw you' to him, rather than be all begging for forgiveness, or whatever they/he expects you to do when these things happen.

[cindyluvs24]

My mom has fundy neighbors which is quite odd considering she lives in a blue-collar Jersey shore town. They are nice people but the father would take any opportunity to preach at people. It's the kind of neighborhood where everybody talks with everybody else out on the street, walking the dog etc. He felt my mom and I were in special need because, being Jewish, he just couldn't stand the thought that we were going to burn for eternity. Mom and I - not so worried. After mom let all of the neighbors know that I was (finally) marrying my boyfriend, Paul said something along the lines of " You need to follow the Bible, its the only manual that marriage needs. You haven't had a good example of a godly home. "

I replied, "No Paul, I guess I haven't. Mom was too busy working two jobs after daddy left. He got PTSD over in Vietnam. So, Paul, what did you do during the war?" He just waves from his porch now.