Duggar Defenders?

[Feberin]

Feberin, what other board are you on? My mommy board is the same way and someone said almost the exact same thing. Of course, I've been raking the supporters over the coals over there because none of them believe that the Duggars could be bad people based on the show that is edited at the hands of Dim Bob and Jchelle, omg! heaven forbid someone lie/fake/act on television!

I'm on ivillage in one of the expecting clubs. I made the mistake of saying that they should take this as a sign and stop and got a lot of responses saying that according to me all women who have miscarriages should stop. I know a lot of the women who responded have had miscarraiges and I'd love to explain that I only think it means you should stop if you have around 19 kids and a uterus that is screaming for a well earned vacation. But I feel like saying nothing might be better because one of the women has like twelve names of children who are in heaven listed in her signature and all the women are pregnant. Nobody has comments for a few days so it seems to have blown over and nobody actually called me names or anything.

[MandyLaLa]

Their's a military spouse support site I'm on and most everyone there loves the duggars. They also know nothing of the truths about them and I'm sure as shit not bothering to try and educate these women since the ones who loves the duggars the most are usual the bible thumping bigoted homophobes.

I don't even think theye'd believe me if I told them all about Joy and Gothard.

[Sister Mary Savage]

I hope that the recent events have changed minds about the Duggars but I don't know. There are some that still believe the entire faceade down to the last detail. When I watched the early specials (off and on but never regularly) the family seemed odd but not that horrible. Now I cringe when I see that huge praire hair do and saccharine sweet cheerleader voice.

[Aurora]

edited b/c now just confusing

[FriendlyFundie]

I think that anyone who has experienced the loss of someone they love should be able to go through the grief process however they need to but this circus that the Duggars have made seems, at least to me, to make a mockery out of it. Look at that huge mega church to hold a memorial service in...I am pro life and believe that they did loose a baby and member of the family but that is it. A member of their family. Outside of that it is not anyone's business. Fame whoring sums it up. It's cheap and disgusting. :x

[MandyLaLa]

I beg your pardon?

That should of totally been homophobes, sorry.

[marmalade]

My "favorite" is SuzanneinAZ or whatever her name is. "Josh's face could look bloated because he might be pumping weight!" Get real lady, the "man" is a lard ass. The only weight he's pumping is his poop out his butt.

I took Suzanne to the woodshed with that post. I don't think she's been back to DWOP since. :twisted:

[Aurora]

That should of totally been homophobes, sorry.

Oh I see, thanks for clarifying.

[muffynbear]

Now, I do think the amount of public sharing the Duggars are doing here is outrageous, and I wonder if they do have an agenda. I can imagine them using this to try to do a little subtle pro-life evangelizing, hoping to push that philosophy by humanizing Jubilee to the public. Or they are hoping to call attention to the grieving process surrounding pregnancy losses. But of course, even if my wild speculation here would be true, it can still be chalked up to grief, to two parents's desperate attempt to give Jubilee's conception and death some meaning. Yeah, I'm back to no judging here.

While I respect your right to defend the Duggars, I must respectfully disagree about their agenda. The thing about the Duggars is that they ALWAYS have an agenda. I can't simply believe that this publicized memorial service is just for JimSlob and Martyr Michelle's grief. They're pushing their anti-choice/pro-fetus agenda on the public. While they may be woefully uneducated, they are media savvy. This freak show will be shown on TLC. Mark my words.

[debrand]

A friend was discussing his outrage over a coworker who expressed joy that Mitchell lost her child. I agreed with him that was a terrible thing to do. However, the friend went on a rant about how the Duggars have always been out of debt, TLC didn't make them rich and that they can take care of all their kids. Although I like him a lot, there was so much misinformation there that I didn't know where to start.

Sometimes fundie lites have a black and white view of the world that can be hard to defeat. They don't want to dig and discover that the happy, smiling family is really crazy and abusive, especially if that family is Christian.

[lilwriter85]

A friend was discussing his outrage over a coworker who expressed joy that Mitchell lost her child. I agreed with him that was a terrible thing to do. However, the friend went on a rant about how the Duggars have always been out of debt, TLC didn't make them rich and that they can take care of all their kids. Although I like him a lot, there was so much misinformation there that I didn't know where to start.

Sometimes fundie lites have a black and white view of the world that can be hard to defeat. They don't want to dig and discover that the happy, smiling family is really crazy and abusive, especially if that family is Christian.

I have heard Duggar defenders say the same things about how JB and Michelle will be able to support the kids without TLC. There is quite a bit of misinformation about the Duggars being out of debt. In their pre-TLC days, they were receiving food and clothing donations from people in their town and the church they used to attend. The Duggars have admitted this in interviews. Without TLC, they probably wouldn't have been able to finish the TTH. At the time when they got the series deal with TLC, they had been struggling to finish that house and were in need of place to live because they sold the small house they were living in to a church. The church gave them additional time to stay in the house and TLC came into the picture and helped them finish the big house.

TLC has made the Duggars rich, without TLC they wouldn't be afford to go on all these trips. Boob's businesses probably do well, but I doubt his incomes from those business could afford to finance a trip of 20+ people to Europe or NYC.

On another message board that I used post on, I debated with a Duggar fan about their finances. I debated with this fan about a year ago after Josie's birth. I mentioned that I felt the Duggars should stop because of risks of midlife pregnancy for Michelle and I said that the Duggars could end up in debt due to medical bills or having their insurance exhausted. This Duggar fan said that those things were "ifs" and course of they are "ifs". I told her that and I said that a family like the Duggars could easily end up in debt if Michelle had complications or they had another preemie or a special needs child. She shot back at me and said that the Duggars will always be ok financially because of the show, DVD's and books.

I do think the Duggars will be ok financially once the show ends because Boob has been likely socking some money away. But the Duggars aren't as wealthy, as their fans think they are. They will likely will not make huge long term profits from their show. I don't see their show having long term airings in domestic or international syndication. Also syndication royalties decrease over time. Their DVD sales aren't huge at all. The only people who shell money for DVD sets are the die hard fans and I wouldn't be surprised if some die hard fans buy home-brewed DVD sets instead of the official releases from DVD's which provide royalties for the Duggars.

As for the Duggars' books, the books likely aren't make the Duggars mega money. The first book did well, but it didn't do extremely well. It never cracked within the top 20 on the NY Times List and the second book has had the same success as the first book. Neither titles will be long term sellers. I can see those titles being out of print in about 10 years. With increased use of e-readers/e-books, the Duggars will lose a bit of profit. I doubt the Duggars do well in audiobook sales, a lot of people will not pay $20 or more to buy an Audible or a CD to hear Michelle narrate in her baby voice. Also they might not have a lot of deals with foreign publishers for translations rights. Part of the reason, some authors become wealthy is because of audiobook sales and selling rights for foreign translations. I doubt that the Duggars will ever make the types of profits that people like Jon Krakauer, Sebastian Junger, or Laura Hillenbrand make in the non-fiction lit world.

The Duggars aren't extremely successful reality stars when it comes to their show or their books. The profits they make do give them some extra money. But that money and the money they make from Boob's businesses aren't guarantees the Duggars will always be ok financially. A medical crisis or another type of crisis could put the Duggars in debt for various reasons. If one of kids got into an accident and became a ventilator dependent quadriplegic, I could see the Duggars having some debt after the insurance and asking for love offerings to buy $30,000 wheelchairs or lift equipment. There are a lot of ways for seemingly wealthy family to end up in debt, the quadriplegic example I gave happened to a family that my boyfriend's mom worked with.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

A friend was discussing his outrage over a coworker who expressed joy that Mitchell lost her child. I agreed with him that was a terrible thing to do. However, the friend went on a rant about how the Duggars have always been out of debt, TLC didn't make them rich and that they can take care of all their kids. Although I like him a lot, there was so much misinformation there that I didn't know where to start.

Sometimes fundie lites have a black and white view of the world that can be hard to defeat. They don't want to dig and discover that the happy, smiling family is really crazy and abusive, especially if that family is Christian.

I have to admit that I first learned of the Duggars on fark.com (via the infamous "it's a vagina, not a clown car" photoshop). Fark is not known to be a sensitive place, to put it mildly, but it's interesting how in Duggar threads you get a combination of (1) "it's not a clown car" (2) "hot dog down a hallway by now surely!!!" and then... (3) "but hey you people in camp (1), don't criticize too hard because they support themselves."

As if. But you'll find people who are more than happy to say that people on assistance should have their kids taken away or be sterilized or whatever (no doubt halfway for the shock value) with a healthy dose of racism, so as their counterpoint, I guess, they'll sorta halfway defend the Duggars. They're white, Christian, "nice" (as far as you can see on TV I guess?) and of course, the holy grail of "self-supporting."

[MerryHappy]

While I respect your right to defend the Duggars, I must respectfully disagree about their agenda. The thing about the Duggars is that they ALWAYS have an agenda. I can't simply believe that this publicized memorial service is just for JimSlob and Martyr Michelle's grief. They're pushing their anti-choice/pro-fetus agenda on the public. While they may be woefully uneducated, they are media savvy. This freak show will be shown on TLC. Mark my words.

This.

Gothardites almost always have an agenda. Everything is turned into something else to promote or condemn.

[Linnea]

I can imagine them using this to try to do a little subtle pro-life evangelizing, hoping to push that philosophy by humanizing Jubilee to the public.

"Little" and "subtle" must mean something different to you than they do to me.

[Peas n carrots]

My "favorite" is SuzanneinAZ or whatever her name is. "Josh's face could look bloated because he might be pumping weight!" Get real lady, the "man" is a lard ass. The only weight he's pumping is his poop out his butt.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

OMG I spit out my coke zero reading that!

[funnieronpaper]

I have 2 people on my f-list that defended what I had to say about them on FB. When Michelle announced she was pregnant, I had 2 or 3 others. I wasn't even rude or speaking with the disdain I really feel. Oh, and one person actually tried to convince me it was non of our business and couldn't understand the fact that when it's put in public for, quite literally nowadays, the whole world to see, they intend it to be our business. SMH :angry-banghead:

Me: So... on one hand we're supposed to give the Duggar family privacy during the memorial and remembrance time following Jubilee Shalom Duggar's death, but on the other hand Cousin Amy and Big Brother Josh are posting pictures from the funeral on their Facebook and photo sharing sites, they're smiling almost giddily in the pictures while standing around the baby's casket as if it was a publicity stunt, and places like TMZ are doing stories on their website and People about it (and probably their shows too). Oh, and remember... this is all none of our business. Here's a concept.... if you wish to grieve in private, make it private!!!!! If it's none of our business, don't put it out there for the internet to see!

Personally, I understand taking photos. I understand a memorial service. All that, I can see being part of the grieving process. What I don't see is saying how private they want it to be while making everything public. Oh, and Josh... putting the caption of your photo as "Just buried my little sis!" is totally inappropriate. I almost expected you to say "Now I'm going to Disney Land!" afterward. (yes, he used an exclamation point)

ME

photo

instagr.am

championnwa's photo on Instagram

Yesterday at 9:59am · Like ·

Me http://m.people.com/bb/newsitem.rbml?item=20553968

Hundreds Attend Jubilee Duggar's Memorial

m.people.com

Yesterday at 10:00am · Like ·

ME http://www.tmz.com/2011/12/14/duggar-family-dead-baby/#.Tul1FdXnv7I

'19 Kids and Counting' -- Duggar Family Snaps Photo of Miscarried Baby

http://www.tmz.com

The family from TLC's "19 Kids & Counting" chose a unique way to commemorate the...See More

Yesterday at 10:01am · Like ·

The Only Agreeing Commenter the Duggars need to be sterilized....er....stopped...yeah, a miscarriage is sad, but I think it's a blessing in disguise, and if you want to live your life in private, don't have your own reality show!!!

Yesterday at 11:43am · Like

Disagreement #1 I don't think the Duggars have a fb account, and if so I doubt they use real names for all the public to see. They are still people who want to live "normal" lives. And people still do smile and laugh at funerals. They did the show as a testimony of God's goodness in their lives. They have blessed so many people. Last I checked we live in America where families can have as many children as they want. I for one have been told I was crazy for having 6, our family could not be complete without each one of them. I don't think I am crazy, but am thankful for each gift the Lord has given me. I don't see how anyone would be "blessed" by having their child die, regardless of age.

22 hours ago · Like

Disagreement #2 I'm skeptical on the authenticity of the Facebook accounts of any of the Duggars considering their request for privacy, although it certainly is possible. Never watched their show & don't intend to in the future. People grieve in different ways so what works for one person is not what would work for another. I've see a lot of weird (in my estimation) things so just take it all with a grain of salt.

21 hours ago · Like

ME I don't agree that Michelle should be sterilized, but I do feel she needs to remember she has 19 other lives that still need mothering. She's putting her life at risk because she feels her mission is to have as many babies as possible. It's what her brand of religion teaches. If you look up Bill Gothard and Quiverfull you'll get a lot more info than I care to relay at this moment.

Josh does have a FB account, but he is extremely guarded about who he lets in. He freely posts photos to Webstargram site I listed above, however. Cousin Amy does have a FB account and at one time was open about allowing anyone who claimed they were a fan friend her. I know because I had friended her. She was also very open about the show and inside information until she admitted Sean, the show's producer, nearly kicking her off of the show for information she had released. I had been a performer myself for over 10 years, just like Dolly is now. There's a way to do things in private and there's making everything public. Giving out information with the intent of "look what we can do" is nothing more than a publicity stunt. If this was the Kardasian family, would we be defending them so much or would we be chastising them for not allowing anything to remain sacred?

Yes, people do laugh and smile at funerals, but people do not typically get their entire families together in front of the casket to pose with a smile. It's also their Gothardism brand of religion. Keep Sweet is what they call it. According to Bill Gothard, showing any emotion other than unbridled joy is a sin, especially for women.

Having been widowed myself and also having had buried both of my parents, I am very aware of odd things people to to grieve. I had gotten odd looks when I was in my beginning stages of grieving my late husband when I had a necklace urn made. I wore the necklace under my shirt most days because the thought of a dead man's remains around my neck made my coworkers queasy, but it helped me in my personal grieving process. I know people say it was odd that I sent some of his remains into space. I've also taken photos of my mother in her casket. I keep the photos on my computer and there alone to sometimes remind me that she's actually gone even though it's been 3 years. I wish I had some of my father's funeral because it's been so long that I sometimes forget what he looked like. This is NOT the same as gathering 23 people around the casket and telling them to smile for the cameras. If there's any time that it's OK to not "keep sweet" it's when a child dies.

21 hours ago · Like

Disagreement #2 I don't know if she believes it's her "mission" to have as many children as possible. From what I've read she & her husband believe that God blesses them with their children & they won't do anything to thwart that process, i.e. birth control. Personally I think she's putting her own health & the health of any future babies at risk, given that she is 45 yrs. old & her body has been through the exertion of pregnancy & birth 20 times already (counting her latest miscarriage, I don't know if she's had any others) & her body has never really had the chance to "recover", so to speak, after each pregnancy & birth. That's just my observation & opinion & for me.......it wouldn't be something I'd choose. From what I've heard & observed all the kids seem to be doing well. They don't seem to be on drugs or in jail or prison.

20 hours ago · Like

ME Bill Gothard is mentioned in the Wiki article regarding Quiverfull

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quiverfull

Quiverfull - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

en.wikipedia.org

Quiverfull is a movement among some conservative evangelical Christian couples c...See More

20 hours ago · Like ·

ME An archived page from the Internet Wayback Machine of the Duggar's website. http://web.archive.org/web/200501111732 ... amily.com/

Jim Bob & Michelle Duggar Family

web.archive.org

20 hours ago · Like ·

ME Another page that links the Duggars to IBLP, which is Bill Gothard's ministry. http://web.archive.org/web/200606150845 ... /links.php

The Duggar Family

web.archive.org

Character Climb Titus 2.com Greenwood F...See More

20 hours ago · Like ·

Disagreement #2 I don't know who Bill Gothard is but, again, if this is what some people believe to be right for them, that's their choice. I'm not sure it's a "mission" to have as many children as possible but it seems to be a beliief that God will give (or not) as many children to couples as He sees fit. That can be debated even among the strongest Christians but I wouldn't touch it. Not for me to second-guess the will of God for anybody's life. Not even my own.

20 hours ago · Like

ME Bill Gothard has been linked to a cult.

20 hours ago · Like · 1 (liked by the only agreeing person from above)

ME Best site to check out would be http://www.nolongerquivering.com/

NO LONGER QIVERING

nolongerquivering.com

“When I was your age, my parents wouldn’t send me to college,†my mother was tel...See More

20 hours ago · Like ·

Disagreement #2 Well, again, their choice. It's what they believe. If their chidren were being harmed or neglected that would be a major problem. And from what I've observed, Mr. Duggar is not a Rusty Yates kind of husband nor is Mrs. Duggar and Andrea Yates type of person. And she's had 20 pregnancies so it seems to me that she's able to cope better with everything that comes with her pregnancies, childbirth & child rearing. Again, not something I would ascribe to personally.

20 hours ago · Like

ME I completely disagree with you that their children aren't neglected, but that's from other things I've observed with her children raising children, the following of the Pearl's method of discipline, secluding the family from outside influence (part of their belief structure states they can not make friends with people outside of their belief scope), and other things that go on in their belief structure. They certainly might not be the Yates family, but they do prescribe to the exact same belief system.

20 hours ago · Like

[roddma]

Speaking of defenders has anyone seen this?

http://duggarswithoutpity.blogspot.com/ ... ts-we.html

Edited to add: Popular defense; children are not spoiled and hard working

[lilwriter85]

Speaking of defenders has anyone seen this?

http://duggarswithoutpity.blogspot.com/ ... ts-we.html

Edited to add: Popular defense; children are not spoiled and hard working

I just read through some of those comments and some were against the Duggars. The popular defense about the Duggar kids not being spoiled and being hard working are already old and there isn't a complete truth to that defense. I think John and the J'Slaves are hard working in what they do. Josh isn't hard working and he has a history of lying about buying and selling the car lots. The older Duggar kids are very sheltered in some ways and the only one that likely could really make it on his own is John David. He has ethic and skills to get a job away from Boob. Josh and the J'Slaves would have trouble getting jobs and I don't see the J'Slaves interviewing well for jobs. They lack some skills in that aspect.

[Constance Vigilance]

Your daughters have to be hard-working when they are raising your other children for you, because 20 children are a lot of work. :shock: I don't think using your kids as slaves/sister-moms counts as a GOOD point for any parenting strategy.

As for the boys -- J-D seems to have a work ethic, but it's plain to see Joshie is disorganised, lazy and arrogant. No hard worker he. We'll find out more about the other boys as they get older.

[Guest Anonymous]

Does she even have a LIFE outside of the 19+1deadbaby&C?

HA!!! Great new name for the show!!!

I used to view the Duggar's lifestyle as a "live and let live" situation, but based on what I've read about them....no more!!!

[roddma]

Ugh That Diane S. is too much like ChrisLucas. Just type the name in Google and she spreads her vile all over. As long as you agree with her she is fine.

[Childless]

I don't understand why these people think so highly of the Duggars. Michelle has basically checked out and left children raising children. No one in the family eats healthy and nutritious food. Michelle cannot tell you anything about her younger kids. She doesn't know them at all. Furthemore, both she and her husband put their own needs in front of the needs of their children (eg. Michelle going to a protest over a carry out selling beer while her micro-preemie was fighting for her life in the hospital). They use the Pearls' discipline methods. They'll do anything to make a buck.

I agree with the previous poster who said if the Kardasians did these things, people would be going nuts. Just because someone says they're Christian doesn't mean they actually live Christian lives. I could go on tv and say I'm an alien from Melmac, doesn't make it true.

[roddma]

I could go on tv and say I'm an alien from Melmac, doesn't make it true.

:lol:

I could say an astronaut found me in a pink bottle on a beach

I started to post this article myself. Type in 'Duggars' in the search box and her articles turn up first. One says' Stop judging the Duggars'". It amazes me how many defenders have never seen the show.

[MarciaBrady]

I'm always confused by the people who defend the Duggars by saying their kids are really well behaved. What show are they watching? The younger kids are hooligans, all they seem to do is run, scream, hit each other, and hurl themselves down stairs. The middle kids can't seem to wipe their own a#@es without the help of the older girls. The only ones who seem to behave in public are the oldest 6, and that's because they're not children. Am I supposed to be impressed that the over 18 crowd manages to go to a museum without destroying every exhibit in sight.

[lilwriter85]

I'm always confused by the people who defend the Duggars by saying their kids are really well behaved. What show are they watching? The younger kids are hooligans, all they seem to do is run, scream, hit each other, and hurl themselves down stairs. The middle kids can't seem to wipe their own a#@es without the help of the older girls. The only ones who seem to behave in public are the oldest 6, and that's because they're not children. Am I supposed to be impressed that the over 18 crowd manages to go to a museum without destroying every exhibit in sight.

I also get confused with those people who say that. The younger Duggar kids aren't extreme monsters, but they aren't angels either. TLC has aired some moments that have shown some of the younger ones misbehaving and there was one episode in which one of the J'Slaves was dealing Johannah or Jennifer refusing to take a nap. There was also another episode that show the younger boys running around a store and riding bicycles in the store.