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Christmas without Santa


Witsec7

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Reading thatwife today I was prompted to start this thread. Apparently thatboyinthebathroom will not have Santa in his Christmas. The basis for making this choice is she doesn't want to lie to him. She does mention she wasn't particularly traumatized when she found out there wasn't a Santa, but her reason for excluding Santa is ethical and based on a parent lying.

I'm wondering how many parents on FJ exclude Santa from their holidays because they don't want to lie to their children. I'm interesting in a broader range of views and perspectives on this issue.

FWIW we did Santa, and did it big time. I worked with a man who sounded like Barry White and my DD would get a call from him every year about 3 days before the holiday. We did not do department store Santas.

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We did Santa, but I caught on pretty young that he wasn't real.

Same thing happened with Jesus too...I got in big trouble for arguing with my catechism instructor (a nun) about how Genesis was incorrect because dinosaur fossils prove it impossible.

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Well she doesnt do gifts for bathroom baby either, really if it isnt all about her then she has no use for it.

She wants to make sure he knows that everything he has is because she spent so much time trying to be a big blogger and make money..it wasnt santa that locked him in a cage with 5 toys it was her damnit and she wants to make sure he knows it. All that neglect is for him and blog hits dontcha know?

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I don't have children, but I never liked the idea of Santa much. I just think it's odd, but that's a personal opinion. The story itself is great, but it's like a fairy tale type thing with me. My parents were big on it, but I was skeptical by the time I was in Kindergarten and stopped believing entirely by 7. However, not sure what I'll do if I ever any children of my own. If my (hypothetical) husband wanted the Santa Claus bit done, I'll do it. Neither here nor there.

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We have Santa in our Christmas but I have never said he was real. I tried just avoiding mentioning it all together but with all the TV shows and movies and grandparents around they found out about it. They asked if Santa was real and I told them about the legends and the stories and how people like to pretend. Santa is real like Mickey Mouse is real. Santa is not real like Mickey Mouse is not real. They understood. We do Santa but in a *wink wink* kind of way. They know it's for fun and they have fun with it.

My reason for avoidance is that I was very upset when I found out Santa wasn't real. I felt betrayed. I swore I would never lie to my kids like that. Some kids find out and are fine, some aren't. I didn't want to risk it.

We also do Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy and such but they never thought they were anything more than a very fun pretend game either.

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Well she doesnt do gifts for bathroom baby either, really if it isnt all about her then she has no use for it.

She wants to make sure he knows that everything he has is because she spent so much time trying to be a big blogger and make money..it wasnt santa that locked him in a cage with 5 toys it was her damnit and she wants to make sure he knows it. All that neglect is for him and blog hits dontcha know?

And yet last year she was all psyched up about the present she was getting from her parents for Christmas, her Iphone.

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Guest Anonymous

There was a thread in Chatter recently which asked whether FJers were angry when they discovered that

Santa isn't real! :o

On the basis of that thread, I would imagine there are quite a few FJers who don't celebrate santa for perfectly well-thought out reasons.

With TW though, I would imagine that she is just too lazy to make Christmas special for T1 in any damn way.... :(

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I like make-believe stuff with my kids. Yes, I am raising a group of people who believe in Santa Claus, fairies, tarot cards, and magic. But I am honest if they ask me straight-up. My 9 year old asked me last week: does Santa really exist? I said, "there is not to my knowledge an old man living at the North Pole, so technically no, but the presents get under the tree somehow." I have given similar answers regarding the tooth fairy and runes. I think as they get older, they understand that certain things are just fun games.

I was raised to believe in magical things and it made my childhood a magical place. I believed that fairies lived in the redwoods near my house and all kinds of ridiculous crap. Some things scared me (Baba Yaga was a common threat from my grandmother :shiver:) and I have avoided talking about those to my children. I harbor no ill-will toward my mother for filling our lives with myth, so I don't see the harm in doing so with my own children. I understand why some people do otherwise and completely approve of their reasons, not that my opinion matters.

About TW: I think she just can't be bothered to do anything nice or extra for T1.

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I never had Santa as a kid, probably because of being Jewish and all. But if i married someone who was really into that, i would just let her handle it for our future kids. I have nothing against it, I would just feel awkward doing it myself. because i've never had the experience.

In terms of T1 she probably doesn't care if she lies to him. I can just picture her saying "Don't worry, sleeping in the bathroom is totally normal!" She just doesn't want to have to buy him anything. And Santa will probably encourage him to WANT things, like a room, and she can't have that.

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She kept her son in the bathroom so she could have a whole separate room for herself. Not exactly high moral ground from which to pontificate about lying.

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I like make-believe stuff with my kids. Yes, I am raising a group of people who believe in Santa Claus, fairies, tarot cards, and magic. But I am honest if they ask me straight-up. My 9 year old asked me last week: does Santa really exist? I said, "there is not to my knowledge an old man living at the North Pole, so technically no, but the presents get under the tree somehow." I have given similar answers regarding the tooth fairy and runes. I think as they get older, they understand that certain things are just fun games.

I was raised to believe in magical things and it made my childhood a magical place. I believed that fairies lived in the redwoods near my house and all kinds of ridiculous crap. Some things scared me (Baba Yaga was a common threat from my grandmother :shiver:) and I have avoided talking about those to my children. I harbor no ill-will toward my mother for filling our lives with myth, so I don't see the harm in doing so with my own children. I understand why some people do otherwise and completely approve of their reasons, not that my opinion matters.

About TW: I think she just can't be bothered to do anything nice or extra for T1.

Thats how we did it. To this day, with an adult child there is still a stocking with surprises from Mr. or Mrs. Klaus, the reindeer and fairies.

Lots of imagination and magick, including a holiday tale I invented about the bat that saved Christmas for the children in our little town. My DD printed and illustrated the tale when she was 12, I had it bound for her. When my grandsons were little it became a part of their holiday tradition as well.

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We tell the stories of Saint Nicholas the Wonderworker (him throwing bags of gold down a poor family's chimney is not where it ends, believe me!) and explain that we give gifts in memory of his generosity and also to remember the Three Wise Men. We also say that people who want to give a nice present without showing off label the gift "From Santa." (Somebody did that for us: two gorgeous dresses for the girls, way out of our price range, with "From Santa" gift tags. The packages were left on our porch and we have no idea who did it.)

As for Santa's reindeer and the cookies and milk and so on, we explain that he is part fairy tale, part Saint Nicholas, part commercial--we showed the kids the original jolly Santa from 19th-century ads.

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We tell the stories of Saint Nicholas the Wonderworker (him throwing bags of gold down a poor family's chimney is not where it ends, believe me!) and explain that we give gifts in memory of his generosity and also to remember the Three Wise Men. We also say that people who want to give a nice present without showing off label the gift "From Santa." (Somebody did that for us: two gorgeous dresses for the girls, way out of our price range, with "From Santa" gift tags. The packages were left on our porch and we have no idea who did it.)

As for Santa's reindeer and the cookies and milk and so on, we explain that he is part fairy tale, part Saint Nicholas, part commercial--we showed the kids the original jolly Santa from 19th-century ads.

It's good to know we have a similar tradition to others. We get a lot of flack from the grandparents for not doing the whole "Santa is literally bouncing down the chimney tonight" thing.

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Santa Claus isn't real? Nonsense. I still believe and always will.

Of course Santa is real. The truth is not that there is no Santa. The truth is that we are all Santa. My children never felt betrayed or lied to because when they began to hear from their friends that there was no Santa they were old enough to understand that Santa is an embodiment of an abstraction (hmmm, much like the hairy thunderer on the throne in the clouds is the embodiment of an abstract concept), which is the spirit of good will and giving. These days gifts from Santa appear under the tree and we are never really sure who gave them, but it wasn't necessarily mom or dad.

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Santa Claus isn't real? Nonsense. I still believe and always will.

1. Where do you live?

2. Make cookies for Santa peanut free, I he can't have peanuts.

:mrgreen:

:whistle:

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We don't make a big deal about it either way- but I have never told them it is real. I just can't imagine telling someone, with a straight face, that a fat man is going to fly around in a sleigh, come down the chimmney, and give them presents. So I tell them it is a story when they get around to asking, which they almost always do. My in-laws freaked though. They acted like we had decided to sacrifice puppies every x-mas eve when they found out my 4yo didn't believe.

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Yes, we do Santa. We encourage our children's imagination and childish notions, and will do so until they decide they are ready to let go of them, and not a moment before, and I resent others deciding this for them. We don't make a HUGE deal of it, but Santa does have a part in our Christmas celebration. My daughter loves to plan the sandwich and pick out the beer for Santa's snack, and my 10-year old enjoys theorizing on which U.S. Air Force aircraft is best suited to escort Santa's sleigh.

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Thats how we did it. To this day, with an adult child there is still a stocking with surprises from Mr. or Mrs. Klaus, the reindeer and fairies.

Lots of imagination and magick, including a holiday tale I invented about the bat that saved Christmas for the children in our little town. My DD printed and illustrated the tale when she was 12, I had it bound for her. When my grandsons were little it became a part of their holiday tradition as well.

Whoa. A few years ago, my youngest brother was insistent about making bat shaped cookies at Christmas time, and my middle brother teased him about it, so my mom and youngest brother collaborated on a story about the Christmas Bat.

I thought we were the only family with a Christmas Bat! What a funny coincidence! :D

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This is my 4 year old's first christmas being verbal. I have been telling him that Santa is pretend, but I don't think he gets what pretend exactly means.

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This is my 4 year old's first christmas being verbal. I have been telling him that Santa is pretend, but I don't think he gets what pretend exactly means.

I would just ask him a lot of questions about Santa and enjoy his imagination. Eventually he'll ask for the truth and you can explain it to him then. Until then there's no harm in letting him explore the idea.....although I personally think there might be harm in making up your own stories...others would disagree.

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Whoa. A few years ago, my youngest brother was insistent about making bat shaped cookies at Christmas time, and my middle brother teased him about it, so my mom and youngest brother collaborated on a story about the Christmas Bat.

I thought we were the only family with a Christmas Bat! What a funny coincidence! :D

Our bat is named Edith and there is always a bat on the xmas tree, and bat shaped cookies. For many years (at another house) we had a bat come and hang on the door wreath a few days before Xmas, and it would magically disappear Xmas eve. 8-)

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