101 Ways to say "I love you"

[Shirley MacLaine]

Honestly, I really hate both giving and receiving massages of any kind. It's fucking boring and it hurts my fingers. I will occasionally do it for Erik and he always offers to reciprocate, but urgh.

[baristachica]

Oh my god. If my husband left me a "tip"...

I love how it says "or you know, even clean up after yourself..."

Really??

[Shirley MacLaine]

PUT YOUR ARM AROUND HER Put your arm around your wife while she's sitting next to you or while walking side by side.

Brilliant! GENIUS!

[2xx1xy1JD]

Thanks for the laugh!

Making heart-shaped pancakes and helping button a shirt are great ways to show love.....to your 5 yr old son. My dh would think WTF?

I have no words for the tip suggestion.

[WonderingInWA]

Ways to Say I Love You to a Woman:

Be sincerely happy for her successes.

Pick up the sick child at school so she can complete a work project.

Do your half of the childcare and housework without constantly asking how or what to do. You have a brain.

Avoid giving advice on matters that she knows better than you do. If your wife has a degree in molecular biology, she can totally handle your kid's science project.

Don't hint about how women look better with long hair. Long hair is a pain in the ass, and many women have a hair texture that looks unkempt once it grows past the shoulders.

Ways to Say I Love You to a Man

Instead of making him work two jobs, have each of you work one.

Offer your input on major decisions; no one deserves the pressure of having to be an omnipotent being.

Wear a miniskirt and fishnets when he least expects it, like when you are going to the movies.

Tell him you are glad he is a feminist.

Handle discipline matters that occur while he is gone. Don't tell him when he gets home and expect him to deal with something the child has already forgotten.

Blow jobs.

LOL -- that last item is SO true. It's such a simple thing to do but it goes a LONG way to providing happiness. Why are guys such pushovers in that regard?

[Shirley MacLaine]

Because getting head is awesome? For everyone. No patience with men who are hesitant to reciprocate. No patience at all.

[emmiedahl]

I have a college friend who hates to write and made it through her composition class because she offered her husband a deal in which he wrote her papers and he received... certain services... in exchange.

I must be a weird female because there are certain things women talk about wanting in bed that I have not found *that awesome*.

[BoomerLynn]

My husband wears steel-toed boots for 8 hrs straight while welding. The last thing I am going to do when he gets home is touch his feet.

[Shirley MacLaine]

I must be a weird female because there are certain things women talk about wanting in bed that I have not found *that awesome*.

I mean, there's nothing that you have to want or not want, or do or not do. I just have personal issues with dudes expecting blowjobs to come as part and parcel of the sex act but not expecting to have to provide what I want. Whether that's giving dome or something else.

I should not have said 'for everyone' :P I just don't buy that head is something men in general like more than women in general

[WonderingInWA]

I posted something and it didn't post -- grrrr. Does that happen to anyone else on this board?

Reciprocity is essential at my house. And a true gentleman means he respects that ladies should be first. Just sayin'.

[annalena]

I just wanted to say "hey, it's not really that bad!"

But- LEAVE HER A TIP?! WTF??

[formergothardite]

If my husband left money on the table, I wouldn't think he was leaving me a tip, I would think he had forgotten it or something.

[Extricated]

Uh. No. Leave me a tip and come home to find your key doesn't fit the lock.

Him: Take the call from your wife's annoying family/friends and tell them off for their incessant nagging. (I was never so in love!)

Call your wife on your way home from work and tell her that you're going to take the kids out for the evening so she can have time to herself.

Don't try to fix her problems while she's talking to you.

Her: Take your husband's car to the shop while he's at work so that he doesn't have to on his day off.

Send him to work with food to share and watch how popular he becomes at the office.

Morning quickies.

Both: Keep your sweaty smelly feet to yourself and don't ask or expect your spouse to rub them.

Never compare your spouse to anyone else. Ever. Not even in jest.

[sugaree]

My husband and I share our money, keep only one checking account, etc. So what's the point of handing a few dollars back and forth? If I need a few dollars, I'll tap MAC and get a few dollars.

The only way leaving a tip would be acceptable would be in the context of roleplay.

[Austin]

My husband and I share our money, keep only one checking account, etc. So what's the point of handing a few dollars back and forth? If I need a few dollars, I'll tap MAC and get a few dollars.

The only way leaving a tip would be acceptable would be in the context of roleplay.

I'm guessing that item on the list was assuming that the women in these marriages have no independent access to $$, which seems to be true in many cases. So, sadly, a woman like that might be greatful for five bucks. Very sadly.

[GeoBQn]

Dear Blessed Mommy,

Your =/= you're.

[emmiedahl]

ShirleyMaclaine, I know you were not saying that all women want that. It just comes up a lot in my group of friends and I always feel freaky saying I don't get anything out of it.

[Shirley MacLaine]

ShirleyMaclaine, I know you were not saying that all women want that. It just comes up a lot in my group of friends and I always feel freaky saying I don't get anything out of it.

Oh sure, I imagine that's crazy annoying. But I still should not have said 'for everyone' just for accuracy's sake :P

[sea_gale]

Don't hint about how women look better with long hair. Long hair is a pain in the ass, and many women have a hair texture that looks unkempt once it grows past the shoulders.

Oh God, THIS A THOUSAND TIMES. There are so many fundie girls with ass length hair which is frizzy as hell and a mess of split ends. If they had cute, contemporary cuts, together with a lick of make up and, y'know, clothes that fit, they might actually score a goddamned husband.

Blow jobs.

Your list could be trimmed to just this item, and it would still shit all over the original.

[Boogalou]

Why didn't she just say to re-enforce every single gender stereotype you've ever heard and call it a day? It would have been a much shorter post.

[JesusFightClub]

Okay. . . uh. . . WTF?

This response cannot be bettered. Leaving *money*?

And cupping my face randomly? To say I would freak out, ew, I would find that horrible not sweet.

[Linnea]

Ways to Say I Love You to a Woman:

Be sincerely happy for her successes.

Pick up the sick child at school so she can complete a work project.

Do your half of the childcare and housework without constantly asking how or what to do. You have a brain.

Avoid giving advice on matters that she knows better than you do. If your wife has a degree in molecular biology, she can totally handle your kid's science project.

Don't hint about how women look better with long hair. Long hair is a pain in the ass, and many women have a hair texture that looks unkempt once it grows past the shoulders.

Ways to Say I Love You to a Man

Instead of making him work two jobs, have each of you work one.

Offer your input on major decisions; no one deserves the pressure of having to be an omnipotent being.

Wear a miniskirt and fishnets when he least expects it, like when you are going to the movies.

Tell him you are glad he is a feminist.

Handle discipline matters that occur while he is gone. Don't tell him when he gets home and expect him to deal with something the child has already forgotten.

Blow jobs.

Emmiedahl wins the internet.

[annalena]

75. DON'T BELITTLE HER OPINIONS If your wife has an opinion or an idea, thank her, and let her know that her thoughts are valuable. Don't act like her ideas are unintelligent or crazy.

Umm. Why would you?! This sounds like it's nice to not let her know you really think that it's all total crap.

This goes for both genders: Listen. Appreciate. Enjoy. Cuddle. Prepare surprises. Care.

[Terrie]

DON'T DEPRIVE HIM Husbands need sex probably more than wives need hugs and compliments.

Really? I mean.... Really!?

[Grace]

I don't make heart shaped pancakes but I will cut hearts into the tops of the pies I bake for my pie-loving husband sometimes. Also other really romantic stuff like the sign for Pi. Or a Tardis.