Anti-gay, complementarian church advertizing at my child's middle school

[FilleMondaine]

I haven't seen this church on Free Jinger, yet, and it would be so good to hear your thoughts. Does anyone know anything about Crossroads Church in Ohio? On Friday, I had to go to the middle school, and it was advertizing all over the place--even in the student bathrooms. While it didn't explicitly say "church", there were lots of coded words and coded images. When I looked it up, I saw that they did a better job hiding their awful beliefs, but from what I can tell:

• May be quiverfull, based on one of their "7 hills we die on" 
  • "Reproduction is about recognizing something that God has created and then reproducing it in his name. Crossroads wants to be a place where Christ-followers reproduce Christ-followers, leaders reproduce leaders and churches reproduce other churches. (From Matthew 28:19-20 in the Bible)"
• Grifting, although they seem to speak in code in their "tithing FAQ", it is easy to read between the lines
  • You obey got when you give 10 to the church--specifically Crossroads Church
  • Giving money to the church Crossroads and not telling your spouse is ok
  • If you are in debt, you honor God Crossroads by giving money
• More Grifting with "90 day tithe challenge"
  • In an earlier print sermon of the current page, they valued "living sacrificially" yourself so that you could tithe give money to Crossroads.
  • They ask you to "trust God Crossroads with your finances"
• LGBTQ+ is bad. They brought in a number of speakers, and do weird weird things against their queer parishioners via this study
  • Kicked out a gay youth pastor
• Sex before marriage is bad in their Date Without Drama printed sermon
  • "Having sex while dating is like driving while blindfolded."

On the other hand, some things sound...ok?

• There are rumors of complementarian, male-headship, but their Statement of Faith doesn't immediately say so. I even looking up the bible verses!
• Apparently, there is a lot of work done around "racial solidarity", especially through this pastor.

 

[Howl]

I'm seeing a big red flag on this one: "We want to grow by really “doing life together.” People who grow in their relationship with God also grow in their friendships with each other, moving beyond the Auditorium in Groups — both in-person and virtually, and through serving." 

Not sure about Crossroads, but reports from some other churches about small groups -- people are encouraged/required to be 100% revealing about personal struggles, without any assurance that personal boundaries are respected or that this information is confidential. 

Also, a church advertising in a school while trying to mask their affiliation is a massive red flag that they will manipulate in any way possible to influence children. 

If possible, make sure those flyers get torn down and try to find out who is posting them.  Public  schools shouldn't tolerate that. 

Edited June 30 by Howl

[gustava]

Why is any advertising allowed in public school?  Did the school allow it?  Or was it "snuck" in?

[FilleMondaine]

I have no idea how it got in. I heard that they have been doing something there for YEARS! So many red flags. But I can’t do anything about it at this time, unless there is an anonymous way to report it.

Our school board sucks! They took away anti-bullying protections against LGBTQ+ kids just because. And they decided to arm teachers, but secretly.

I don’t know what to do.

But thank you FJ for confirming that something is definitely not-right.

[Audrey2]

I just looked them up as well and I feel really uncomfortable with what I've read on their website. I'm not surprised though that they're in Ohio. Ohio is the same state that allows students to attend LifeWise academy once a week during school hours. This also makes me extremely uncomfortable. Here is a link to the LifeWise website. https://lifewise.org/

If you just scroll through their website without clicking on any links I think you can see why I feel this is problematic. I see so much loaded language there.

[FilleMondaine]

19 minutes ago, Audrey2 said:

Ohio is the same state that allows students to attend LifeWise academy once a week during school hours. This also makes me extremely uncomfortable. Here is a link to the LifeWise website. https://lifewise.org/

We moved to Ohio from Texas. So it was a move better, but I still cried when I learned that we would be living in Ohio. Ohio kind of sucks.

[Alisamer]

1 hour ago, FilleMondaine said:

I have no idea how it got in. I heard that they have been doing something there for YEARS! So many red flags. But I can’t do anything about it at this time, unless there is an anonymous way to report it.

Our school board sucks! They took away anti-bullying protections against LGBTQ+ kids just because. And they decided to arm teachers, but secretly.

I don’t know what to do.

But thank you FJ for confirming that something is definitely not-right.

My suspicion is someone in school admin and/or school board is associated with this church. Could be a teacher but I think that's less likely than admin. Which is not cool, but makes it harder to combat. And with the way the lines between church and state are getting stomped on related to schools lately, it might be harder to push against there, as well.

Just brainstorming ways to go up against this:

Is there a local religious group that would oppose this, who might be willing to make a stink? A Jewish or Muslim congregation, perhaps the Catholic diocese, pagan groups, Church of Satan?  Someone who isn't big on proselytizing who would oppose to "their" kids being tricked into attending a church like that? 

Is there a local TV news station that takes on "fighting injustice" sorts of stories? The "on your side" sort of segment where they go after the local bodyshop who scammed one of their viewers? I wonder if tipping off a local news reporter or two might inspire them to do a segment on it... it seems just the sort of thing they might like having a scoop on to stir up discussion and views.

Similarly an anonymous letter to the editor to the local newspaper might not be a bad thing.

Surprisingly what might be most effective, but which might take a little effort if you want to be truly anonymous - create a new throwaway Reddit account and post about it on the local subreddit. Reddit can be a cesspit but they can get things DONE if they're riled up. Possibly also post as a question in an "ask teachers" sub there - teachers themselves may have advice on how to push against it more specifically. 

Alternatively, what often works best is when the students themselves push back against things like this. It's risky, hard, and nobody wants to be the squeaky wheel - but if there's any sort of LGBTQ+ ally group, or a teacher (preferably a tenured one) who openly makes their room a welcoming space, or some other group of kids who would push against this, they might be effective in getting it changed. My guess is that they just ignore the advertising and may not have any real idea it's even a church. They're bombarded with ads so much these days it takes a lot to get past the apathy, but I bet there are kids who would be appalled to know they're being proselytized to in school. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, FilleMondaine said:

We moved to Ohio from Texas. So it was a move better, but I still cried when I learned that we would be living in Ohio. Ohio kind of sucks.

The big cities like Cinci, Columbus, and Cleveland are fantastic. Unfortunately there are a lot of smaller towns where religion and public school aren’t totally separate. I purposely live in a religiously diverse area because of this. We are agnostic so we don’t want a public school pushing Christianity on our kids. 

[FilleMondaine]

@Alisamer thank you so much for the suggestions. My first thought was also Satanic Church, too. But I think that your Reddit idea is best, and I will try that. The part that I cannot get out of my head is that they advertise in bathrooms. So disturbing.

Has anyone else seen churches in public schools?

[gustava]

Consider contacting Americans United for the Separation of Church and State.

[Antipatriarch]

6 hours ago, gustava said:

Consider contacting Americans United for the Separation of Church and State.

Or the Freedom From Religion Foundation (Annie Laurie Gaylor and Dan Barker). They have been in the trenches for years confronting and educating school districts on these issues, and filing lawsuits when necessary.

[FilleMondaine]

Thank you all so much for the suggestions! I decided what I am going to do:

1) Socialize that this is happening at the middle school. Socialize the heck out of it. Even mention it on Reddit. Maybe someone will take up this problem.*

2) Continue working with school board members about another unjust issue there. I am so close to a breakthrough, and cannot risk those relations at this time.

3) If the proselytizing isn’t resolved by the time the other injustice is resolved, then I will make a confidential complaint to one of the ‘adults’ like ACLU, League of Women Voters, and/or Religious Freedom Foundation.

*if any of you are Ohio residents and want to go ahead and report it, please send me a DM, and I will tell you the info. This is not asking any of you to report it—that is vastly inappropriate—rather if someone really feels strongly enough and feels urgent.

[pupper]

In our local schools, all announcements posted around the building must be initialed by the principal. Is this the policy in your district too?

[FilleMondaine]

4 hours ago, pupper said:

In our local schools, all announcements posted around the building must be initialed by the principal. Is this the policy in your district too?

I have no idea, because I am learning that this small town (near a modest city) has a lot of quirks.

On 7/1/2024 at 11:41 AM, Alisamer said:

 

Alternatively, what often works best is when the students themselves push back against things like this. It's risky, hard, and nobody wants to be the squeaky wheel - but if there's any sort of LGBTQ+ ally group, or a teacher (preferably a tenured one) who openly makes their room a welcoming space, or some other group of kids who would push against this, they might be effective in getting it changed. My guess is that they just ignore the advertising and may not have any real idea it's even a church. They're bombarded with ads so much these days it takes a lot to get past the apathy, but I bet there are kids who would be appalled to know they're being proselytized to in school. 

Thank you so much for your brainstorming ideas. And I really want to say something wonderful about our students. About a year ago, the school board decided to get rid of LGBTQ+ protections for students and staff. It was so underhanded, and they scheduled a surprise meeting without telling anyone…

…but word leaked and the community assembled with almost 5 hours of testimony from students and community members. Teachers were not allowed to comment, but they all arrived in solidarity. Even teachers and the principals of the elementary schools. Most of the testimony was from high school students, who were prepared and eloquent. I had lost it in my testimony because days before a board member chose to look the other way when a student attempted suicide after bullying. But dang, those kids!

Unfortunately, as a grown-up of a 5th-grade kid, I cannot just shout “high schoolers, assemble!”

Besides, they have a right to be jaded after the school board voted to erase those protections even after 5 hours of testimony with only 1 person testifying in favor of the board. Sigh.

[Caroline]

Almost every elementary, middle,and high school where I live has a Civil Rights team who address things like this. I started a group at my high school with another teacher. Now it's run by another teacher and a parent. (I just retired) But I don't live in small town Ohio. It's very blue here. It still might be worth investigating.

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I thought you might be interested in this article:

 

https://www.dispatch.com/story/news/courts/2024/07/06/copyright-lawsuit-filed-by-hilliard-christian-group-against-critic/74310083007/

[Audrey2]

19 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I thought you might be interested in this article:

 

https://www.dispatch.com/story/news/courts/2024/07/06/copyright-lawsuit-filed-by-hilliard-christian-group-against-critic/74310083007/

Thank you for posting this. I'm glad that this brave parent is standing up and publicizing exactly what life was teaches, instead of letting all parents feel like it's going to be a character curriculum rooted in the Bible. 

I know in my area we have Good News Clubs but the two that I know of both meet after school.

[FilleMondaine]

On 7/4/2024 at 3:43 PM, pupper said:

In our local schools, all announcements posted around the building must be initialed by the principal. Is this the policy in your district too?

Unfortunately, there is no signature--it would be wonderful if there were a single person to ask. But I imagine that the lack of written approval has allowed the secrecy for something like this to happen. Thank you, @Alisamer for pointing out what can happen in shadowy places with no oversight.

20 hours ago, Audrey2 said:

Thank you for posting this. I'm glad that this brave parent is standing up and publicizing exactly what life was teaches, instead of letting all parents feel like it's going to be a character curriculum rooted in the Bible. 

 

20 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I thought you might be interested in this article:

https://www.dispatch.com/story/news/courts/2024/07/06/copyright-lawsuit-filed-by-hilliard-christian-group-against-critic/74310083007/

 

This guy is a hero.

[FilleMondaine]

Ok, I have news. (I hope I am following the rules, so don't hesitate to jump in if I am being unknowingly naughty, @Coconut Flan!)

LifeWise has also been making incursions in the Dayton area, where I live. So while I really hate that Crossroads is in the middle school...today I wondered if their presence kind of blocks LifeWise from sinking tentacles into this school district. Again, it is NEVER ok to do church-stuff at public schools. But this might be an unexpected upside? I mean, unexpected "upside" with much sarcasm.

So which is worse? Crossroads advertising for church services that take place at the school during non-school hours? Or LifeWise happening outside the school but during school hours? Crossroads sucks, but I hear that LifeWise is worse! What do I do?

[JermajestyDuggar]

On 7/10/2024 at 3:07 PM, FilleMondaine said:

Ok, I have news. (I hope I am following the rules, so don't hesitate to jump in if I am being unknowingly naughty, @Coconut Flan!)

LifeWise has also been making incursions in the Dayton area, where I live. So while I really hate that Crossroads is in the middle school...today I wondered if their presence kind of blocks LifeWise from sinking tentacles into this school district. Again, it is NEVER ok to do church-stuff at public schools. But this might be an unexpected upside? I mean, unexpected "upside" with much sarcasm.

So which is worse? Crossroads advertising for church services that take place at the school during non-school hours? Or LifeWise happening outside the school but during school hours? Crossroads sucks, but I hear that LifeWise is worse! What do I do?

Lifewise seems so much worse! I can’t believe how many schools are allowing them to take kids off campus during the school day for Bible lessons! It’s insane! 

[Brittany15]

So I don’t know anything about the church but I do know some things about schools. There is a very good chance that students are putting up these advertisements- especially in the student bathrooms. Often flyers and other things get posted by kids and teachers don’t even notice. The teachers just have so many more things to worry about. It may be a case of kids being told my their pastor to hang up these flyers at school. If I were you I’d contact the principal and approach it as an -“ I don’t know if you are aware but these flyers have been posted. Since I’m sure you are aware of the separation of church and state I wanted to draw your attention to them so you can get these taken down as soon as possible.” 

[FilleMondaine]

@Brittany15 You are right that there is a long and healthy tradition of kids posting things in bathrooms. Heck, there is even an 80s song about "for a good time call!" Other teenagers post things with a deep heart and full convictions.

This, however, seems to be grown-up supported: The flyers are in protected plastic cases screwed to the bathroom walls. There are 6ft signs and banners in the hall. There are sign-up forms on every table. So not cool.

[Hane]

This reminds me of See You at the Pole. When my daughter was in high school in the ‘90s, the evangelical Baptist church a friend of hers attended tried to start up a “student led” version of this, where kids were supposed to meet around the school’s flagpole every morning right before homeroom for “voluntary prayer.”

IIRC, it didn’t really take off. Still, it gave me the icks: I mean, would kids in a fairly secular town decide to do this of their own free will? And around the flagpole? That’s some pretty performative church/state glopping together right there.

[Brittany15]

I don’t know, I feel like “see you at the pole” is a good example of what freedom of religion/separation of church and state actually looks like. A school cannot require observance of any religion or even have teachers lead it. However, this doesn’t mean that you don’t have the freedom to practice religion yourself. Students are allowed to lead their own prayers on school grounds and have the absolute freedom to do this. Students also are allowed to not participate in prayer at all and have the absolute freedom to do this as well. 

[Hane]

@Brittany15, what I meant is that I doubted the kids thought this up and decided to do it on their own. It felt like something their church leadership coerced them into.