Sister Wives 8: And Another One Down, Another One Bites the Dust?

[Botkinetti]

I think Robyn considered her time with Kody as a prize because the other wives were jealous. Now that they’re gone and she has him 24/7 it might feel more like a punishment.

[Cults-r-us]

On 1/14/2023 at 10:06 PM, Letgo said:

I kind of hope the show continues. I’m curious as to how the marriage of Kody and Robyn will fare when the other wives/children are pretty much out of the picture-and out not just because Kody chooses to ignore them. I’m thinking Robyn might not be as happy with a monogamous marriage. She may have had Kody mostly to herself before but this could be a whole new ballgame!

Here it is, Monday morning. Sister Wives season 17 has ended and we face the new normal without reading and listening to half a dozen Sister Wife recaps. Not having to watch Sister Wives is a relief, but not watching it leaves a void because we get so caught up in the drama. I would like another season if they do a little heavy lifting telling their life after polygamy story.

[Coconut Flan]

According to Christine, season 18 was being filmed as 17 aired.

[purple_summer]

On 1/14/2023 at 11:06 PM, Letgo said:

I think the show scripted/gave excuses for Meri not being present for the birth of Maddie’s first child and for her family’s visit during a time Meri was “away on business” or whatever the excuse was. I’d kind of like to rewatch the entire show now, to look for things I missed or accepted on face value. Not gonna happen but I am curious. I did have a lot of questions through the years about this family and how it operated but now I have even more. Just how bad were things among all the Browns?

Watching it back you can see a lot of the cracks in the family, even when they were claiming to be happy. The Meri/Maddie birth incident makes more sense when you know they weren’t actually comfortable being in the other wife’s spaces. The nanny in flagstaff makes more sense when you remember Robyn had her niece living with her and handling childcare the entire time they were in Vegas. Christine mentioned being hurt that Robyn never asked her to help watch/parent her children and now Robyn claims she never tried to build a relationship with them. Aspyn’s wedding was at the same place Meri and Kody had their 20th anniversary dinner in season one (where the baby stuff first came up). There’s actually a lot in the earlier seasons that they just conveniently forget or reframe later on. 

[Cults-r-us]

On 1/12/2023 at 9:04 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’m not surprised he comes off as a misogynist. I think Kody is too. And probably a lot of others in their polygamy friend groups. Most forms of polygamy I’ve seen are patriarchal. So it makes sense. 

I fail to see the crisis in Meri getting physical disciplining other wives' children. The Browns are not overt fundie, but certainly fundie-adjacent. All the fundies advocate beating children, everywhere, all the time. Michael Pearl's sacred tome is in their bookcases, next to the Holy B. Anybody remember Michelle D. whispering into (I think) little James' ear he would soon have a date with the Duggar Rod of Correction should he not immediately regulate himself? And he responded with fear and trepidation and promptly corrected his behavior. Who can argue with success?

The crisis is, while we are well accustomed to the fundie system of corporal child behavior  management, TLC is not courting us. It presented the Browns as a tad crunchy (the home births) regular, wonderfully happy, family who happened to practice polygamy to the mainstream public.

There are layers of problems here. First is if Meri had anger management problems dealing with 13 Brownlets, including the affable, oafish, smart-mouthed Paedon, it was buried under their narrative and not addressed. 

The question is, how much other stuff is waiting to crawl out from under the narrative?

[waltraute]

15 hours ago, Cults-r-us said:

I fail to see the crisis in Meri getting physical disciplining other wives' children. The Browns are not overt fundie, but certainly fundie-adjacent. All the fundies advocate beating children, everywhere, all the time. Michael Pearl's sacred tome is in their bookcases, next to the Holy B. Anybody remember Michelle D. whispering into (I think) little James' ear he would soon have a date with the Duggar Rod of Correction should he not immediately regulate himself? And he responded with fear and trepidation and promptly corrected his behavior. Who can argue with success?

The crisis is, while we are well accustomed to the fundie system of corporal child behavior  management, TLC is not courting us. It presented the Browns as a tad crunchy (the home births) regular, wonderfully happy, family who happened to practice polygamy to the mainstream public.

There are layers of problems here. First is if Meri had anger management problems dealing with 13 Brownlets, including the affable, oafish, smart-mouthed Paedon, it was buried under their narrative and not addressed. 

The question is, how much other stuff is waiting to crawl out from under the narrative?

I wonder this too. I think the only thing holding back some of the kids at the moment is concern for their mothers' main source of income. As long as there is hope for another season, or a spinoff show for Janelle and Christine, many of kids will likely hold back their revelations. There will be a few snippets along the way, but nothing outright and major. 

Paedon made it seem like what Meri was doing was drastic even for their fundamentalist family. He mentioned that his dad engaged in physical punishment, but it was business as usual, no big deal. Meri's was of a different stripe, at least in his perception. The teasing nature of the hints make it impossible to tell what really happened though, so who knows?

[Cults-r-us]

7 hours ago, waltraute said:

 

Paedon made it seem like what Meri was doing was drastic even for their fundamentalist family. He mentioned that his dad engaged in physical punishment, but it was business as usual, no big deal. Meri's was of a different stripe, at least in his perception. The teasing nature of the hints make it impossible to tell what really happened though, so who knows?

I know the show was supposed to be a commercial for polygamy. Still, it would have been helpful as far as portraying the complexities of growing up in a cult or being cult-adjacent, had the Browns not presented theirselves as a happy, main-stream family who happens to practice polygamy, but rather offspring of a polygamist culture who individualized their family to make it work for them. That would have given them the wiggle room to do some heavy lifting exploring how their own family experiences influenced their attitudes toward each other and child-rearing practices. Instead their show is mostly fluffy entertainment, instead of an honest exploration of making a healthy, polygamist family (if there is such a thing).

How was Meri disciplined as a child? Because you have anger issues dealing with a gaggle of children years ago, does that make you a danger to children now (looking at you, Katie Joy- that is not a fair statement)? No one understands Meri, but she does not seem to have been a popular Brown family member. She presents herself as being misunderstood, and does not take responsibility for problems she may have caused.

One of the issues here is not adhering to unspoken rules. We do not, and will not, hear any Duggars or Pearls complaining they did not like being joyfully available to be blanket trained or knocked into submission by the family Rod of Correction. Whereas Meri may have been reacting in anger, being unable to cope with many children, the Quverful/AUB patriarchs had an agenda to establish control over their kids by intimidation. And part of that control is the expectation family members will keep mum about abuse.

But our boy, Paedon, did not internalize this expectation, and announced publicly, on Tik-Tok, he did not like getting hit. Good for you, Paedon! But perhaps Paedon does not understand the unspoken family rules. He is like our 3-year-old who yells "oh, shit!" at church because he doesn't understand it is okay for Mommy to cuss, it is not ok for him to repeat what he hears, and when we are at church we never say anything bad, and we furthermore never act like anyone in our family has salty language. 

But the biggest shock is Paedon, who (apparently) got hit, then hits his sister, Gwen. Everybody is for shocked, appalled and indignant he is like this. Whoever heard of a child acting out on his siblings how he, himself was treated? No one at the Brown household has heard of such a thing. Paedon's behavior is a mystery.

I hope Paedon is in a place where he can learn to not be abusive, and to change the pattern of his raising.

[apandaaries]

The other thing Paedon mentioned in the video was Kody flicking his mouth. He mentioned another form of correction as well (maybe spanking?), but watching it once was punishment enough. But he stated that Kody did the right thing, and it was warranted (I cannot imagine flicking a child’s mouth for being disrespectful.)

He does imply that physical discipline was a major component of all the kids’ upbringings, but also that Meri was far more extreme — but only with some kids. 
IMO, if a kid is accustomed to physical punishments, but can notice that some punishments are too extreme, that’s a major red flag. 
Gwendolyn said something along the lines of, Meri never attacked me, but she did get violent with others. The exact phrasing is off, but “attacked” and “violence” were used. And she’s a fan of Meri! 

Paedon also founded very Kody-like by saying he (and ALL other men) want to be feared. Like Genghis Khan! He alluded to being friend-zoned and thinking that if his female friends feared him, they wouldn’t do that. It wasn’t a great sequence of words from him. 
I do agree that if Paedon was accustomed to violence, that’d help explain his aggression (hitting G and becoming a bouncer — he’s getting paid to intimidate others and fight them if necessary).
But he doesn’t seem inclined toward introspection and reflection, and he does have a lot to reconsider about the world. I hope he does, because I truly hope for the best for these kids who’ve been forced into the public eye thanks to their parents’ desire for fame. 

[Cults-r-us]

11 hours ago, apandaaries said:

The other thing Paedon mentioned in the video was Kody flicking his mouth. He mentioned another form of correction as well (maybe spanking?), but watching it once was punishment enough. But he stated that Kody did the right thing, and it was warranted (I cannot imagine flicking a child’s mouth for being disrespectful.)

He does imply that physical discipline was a major component of all the kids’ upbringings, but also that Meri was far more extreme — but only with some kids. 
IMO, if a kid is accustomed to physical punishments, but can notice that some punishments are too extreme, that’s a major red flag.

I suspect Paedon thought Kody's discipline was reasonable because Kody established being an authority over the kids, but Meri established herself as a scary nuisance. Paedon respected Kody, but not Meri, even though both (apparently) used corporal punishment.

[gustava]

23 hours ago, Cults-r-us said:

I suspect Paedon thought Kody's discipline was reasonable because Kody established being an authority over the kids, but Meri established herself as a scary nuisance. Paedon respected Kody, but not Meri, even though both (apparently) used corporal punishment.

Does Paedon “respect” Kodouche or fear him?  Is he confusing the two?

[Cults-r-us]

On 1/16/2023 at 9:49 AM, Coconut Flan said:

According to Christine, season 18 was being filmed as 17 aired.

Mykelti and Gwen posting content is helping keep interest in the Sister Wives brand between seasons. Mykelti's experience in making content is evident.

I thought Kody was being his usual dick-ish self when he told Mer she needed to resolve her relationships with the older kids. The reasons for this are apparently Meri having coping, anger, and possible corporal issues dealing with them and an unpublished event(?) that ended people's relationship with her. Apparently these issues were not addressed beyond Christine's angry confrontation and ending her friendship with Meri.

This family remains splintered because they do not resolve conflict. Janell and Meri went to family therapy, but apparently not Meri, Christine and the kids.

On the surface, it is decent Tony and Mykelti wish Meri well, but it's also sad because Meri is persona non grata. I hate to agree with Kody, but if Meri was sincere about staying in the family, she needed to own her role in the conflict and apologize and make amends to the older kids.

[Cults-r-us]

Anybody reading Kody and Robyn had a failed courtship attempt with a lady in South America?  Is Season 19 going to be filming failed courtships and Robyn crying over how unf---able they are?

[JermajestyDuggar]

5 hours ago, Cults-r-us said:

Anybody reading Kody and Robyn had a failed courtship attempt with a lady in South America?  Is Season 19 going to be filming failed courtships and Robyn crying over how unf---able they are?

I feel like that’s the only way they could find a new wife. Everyone who is open to polygamy in the US has heard of their drama and will stay away. They have to go to another country to find someone who will give them a chance. But I could imagine even someone in another country would be like “so you have 3 ex wives? Ok I’m out.” 

[Cults-r-us]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I feel like that’s the only way they could find a new wife. Everyone who is open to polygamy in the US has heard of their drama and will stay away. They have to go to another country to find someone who will give them a chance. But I could imagine even someone in another country would be like “so you have 3 ex wives? Ok I’m out.” 

Not to mention they are broke, Robyn gives off very ick vibes and Kody's ramen mop may not appeal to a would-be polygamist. Plus then they explain to her she will be a worker bee, give Kody her earnings and see him only occasionally because he has to stay with Robyn.

Will Kody ever figure out he would have been better off with any of his other wives? Robyn has never and will never work and he will be stuck paying alimony to her for years.

[gustava]

Does anyone think Kodouche is paying any child support for Truely?   

[viii]

I personally find it hilarious that Kody is available for hire on Cameo. I saw one video he made and it's truly cringy. 

[Cults-r-us]

3 hours ago, gustava said:

Does anyone think Kodouche is paying any child support for Truely?   

No, I don't think he's ever paid any support to anyone.

But boy howdy he's going to after Robyn shit-cans him.

[gustava]

23 hours ago, Cults-r-us said:

No, I don't think he's ever paid any support to anyone.

But boy howdy he's going to after Robyn shit-cans him.

You really think sobbing Robyn will divorce him?  

[Cults-r-us]

It depends on how miserable it is to be around Kody in his angry, post-divorce state, if (when) they lose the show, how broke they get and how big a problem her spending really is.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Just imagine dating and having to admit on your first date that you have 4 ex wives and 18 kids. Most people would say they needed to use the restroom and climb out the window. 

[Pecansforeveryone]

I would also factor how much Kody is at home versus how many gun shows he is on the road for and how long. He seemed in pretty good spirits when "officiating" his business partner's wedding. If he chooses to spend more time on the road, it may tide things over for a bit. 

[viii]

I don't think Robyn will divorce him anytime soon. She comes across as the type that doesn't want to be alone, and I doubt she would willingly go back to a life of single mom unless she had no choice, or she had a better option come along. 

[Letgo]

I’ve been wondering about something. Now that the first three wives are exes in their 50s, what does the future hold for them financially? I’m especially wondering about Christine. She raised the kids for years and didn’t have a paycheck, so no social security withholding. Can she get social security from Kody’s work record? They were never legally married, but (sort of, when safe) presented as a married couple, and lived as such. Meri and Janelle have/have had longer work records established so they’re in better shape. But how do they all divide the family money/property for support and retirement? I hope Christine and the other wives receive individual paychecks for the show so they’ll get some social security. If it’s still around! How much can people make from selling Lula Ro or Plexus?

[Coconut Flan]

Christine can't collect on Kody's record as a common law wife because the US doesn't recognize bigamy.  Kody was legally married to someone else during his time with Christine barring the few days between divorce and remarriage.  

[gustava]

17 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

Christine can't collect on Kody's record as a common law wife because the US doesn't recognize bigamy.  Kody was legally married to someone else during his time with Christine barring the few days between divorce and remarriage.  

Does anyone know when/how many jobs he had that paid into Social Security?