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Maxwell 55: Anna and Mary Adventures at ABC - Freedom!


Coconut Flan

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On 9/25/2022 at 7:23 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

This was on the ABC sports page. It looks like it’s common to get married over the summer even if you haven’t graduated yet. Samuel is graduating this May. I’m thinking maybe he will propose in the spring and then they can get married next summer before Mary’s senior year. 

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Yay!  No frumpy brides with bulky tee shirts under their modified ugly dresses.

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On 9/18/2022 at 12:54 AM, Bluebirdbluebell said:

I noticed the Maxwell pages on fundie wiki have been edited and deleted. No pages for Nathan, Christopher, Joseph and Jesse.  I'm not sure what Nathan does, but the rest of them work at Swift Otter. I think the Maxwells themselves might have had those pages taken down. It makes me wonder how long the blog will up. 

It's still there.....so far

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Sarah changed her linkedin.  She's not working any more.  Guess it was a job that she couldn't (or wouldn't) do from home.  

Homemaker

Aug 2022 - Present 3 months

SWIFTotter, Inc.

5 years 9 months

Executive Assistant

Jan 2017 - Sep 2022 5 years 9 months

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21 minutes ago, theologygeek said:

Sarah changed her linkedin.  She's not working any more.  Guess it was a job that she couldn't (or wouldn't) do from home.  

Homemaker

Aug 2022 - Present 3 months

SWIFTotter, Inc.

5 years 9 months

Executive Assistant

Jan 2017 - Sep 2022 5 years 9 months

I wonder who will take her place. Her single sisters are busy with college. Can they find a godly young man or woman outside the family to take her place?

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3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I wonder who will take her place. Her single sisters are busy with college. Can they find a godly young man or woman outside the family to take her place?

I don't think Joseph cares if the person is a godly young woman outside the family.  His female marketing coordinator is tatted up with facial piercings.  

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9 hours ago, theologygeek said:

Sarah changed her linkedin.  She's not working any more.  Guess it was a job that she couldn't (or wouldn't) do from home.  

Homemaker

Aug 2022 - Present 3 months

SWIFTotter, Inc.

5 years 9 months

Executive Assistant

Jan 2017 - Sep 2022 5 years 9 months

This isn't surprising to me. She was raised to be a SAHW and SAHM and now she finally gets to be a SAHW and run her own house, instead of following her parents schedule rules. 

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Sarah has been busy cutting all the strings.  I hope she can see what a healthy relationship with her family members could and should be.

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It's possible that Sarah is excited about her new life and wants to pour all her energies into that right now. But if they don't have any kids, I wouldn't be surprised if Sarah does start working at something at some point. My hope is that Sarah does whatever she finds fulfilling after all the horribleness of living with Teri and Steve. 

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3 minutes ago, Baxter said:

It's possible that Sarah is excited about her new life and wants to pour all her energies into that right now. But if they don't have any kids, I wouldn't be surprised if Sarah does start working at something at some point. My hope is that Sarah does whatever she finds fulfilling after all the horribleness of living with Teri and Steve. 

And I’ll just add, this is exactly how life is designed and meant to be. Adults are meant to make their own life choices and decisions as long as their ability allows them to do so.

I think Steve needs counseling. His approach presents as anxiety and fear based. Thankfully his kids seem healthy.

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What infuriates me about the Maxwell's is that they spent years preaching a certain lifestyle; while holding up their kids as examples of its success, while not realizing that it wasn't their lifestyle that was solely responsible for their kids success. 

They preached homeschooling and how higher education was not necessary. However, Teri has a college degree so their kids were being taught by someone with higher education. Someone who has very little real education is going to have a lot harder time teaching high school then Teri; who has actually taken higher level math and english classes. 

They also talked a lot about being self employed, having a single income home, and supporting a million kids. However, the reason this was sustainable for them was because Steve spent many years working for Boeing and had already made quite a bit of money. 

And now, after preaching for so long about courtships and keeping daughters at home they had to send all three girls away to actually have a chance at a life. 

 

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One more thing…maybe the reason the girls present as so healthy despite Steve’s rules, regulations and absurd restrictive treatment, is because they had each other? So maybe, just maybe, there was strength in numbers.

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1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

One more thing…maybe the reason the girls present as so healthy despite Steve’s rules, regulations and absurd restrictive treatment, is because they had each other? So maybe, just maybe, there was strength in numbers.

I had a breakthrough several years ago in therapy when I said "if things were so screwed up, why did all of my brothers and sisters and I end up relatively normal, good people?" And the therapist said, "the only thing that I can say is that there must have been some kind of protective factor." And I said, "like what?" And she said "..." and I said, "like that we were all there for each other?" And she said "yes."

And it makes me feel hope for all of these massive families. Like, it's very very terrible when parents are abusive and there's one child and nobody else. But with a bunch of kids - there are whispers in the dark, somebody to turn to if you need it, and the occasional "hey do you remember" when you're 25 years old and have suppressed some shit. I still sometimes text one sibling or another and say, "hey, it was fucked that XYZ, right? Like, that's not how normal families do it?" I'm 43.

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2 hours ago, ElizaB said:

However, the reason this was sustainable for them was because Steve spent many years working for Boeing and had already made quite a bit of money. 

And this highly paid work would have made a significant difference when Steve (and Teri, based on Steve's income) applied for Social Security benefits.  

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I only hope that the choice to stop working was HER choice!  That she chooses to focus on her new home, establishing and building her relationship with her husband and his family.  

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On 9/17/2022 at 4:28 PM, Caroline said:

Ugh! The arrogance of such a youngin'

He only knows his indoctrination. I remember a man discussing whether you're saved when you acknowledge Jesus as Lord or if you're not saved until you make Him Lord of your life. This kid has been given tools and graphs and interrogation techniques to root out the true savedness of his subject. He doesn't know he's being an overbearing, cringe-worthy, judgmental ass. Imagine his bloviating role models!

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On 10/5/2022 at 5:21 PM, NoseyNellie said:

I only hope that the choice to stop working was HER choice!  That she chooses to focus on her new home, establishing and building her relationship with her husband and his family.  

I am sure it was. It's what she's been told all her life that homemaking was what she was put on earth to do.

That said, while it's not something I lose sleep over, I wonder if that thing about women marrying men who remind them of their fathers (often all the while saying that their partner is not at all like their father) might mean that Sarah married someone who is controlling, like Steve. I hope not, or if it is the case, that he is still kind and loving and she is happy.

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Quoting Kwyn's essay that was mentioned SEVERAL weeks away (sorry, haven't got around to FJing in a while):

Quote

"My mom’s description of her own parenting style is simple yet profound. While dwelling on this theme, she said, “I think that parents need to love their children just the way they are, not make them into something that they’re not. If you love your children truly in a spiritual way, you’ll be happy with them the way they are.” She continues, “Maybe things won’t turn out exactly the way you want them to, but that doesn’t mean you stop trying or loving. You just have to see beyond today. You just have to keep praying they’ll become the person the Lord wants them to become. Sometimes it doesn’t happen overnight. Sometimes it doesn’t happen for years…” 

It hurts because my parents are quite sure the person I turned out to be is not at all the person the Lord wants me to become, and that really strains our relationship.  I can't see how they'll every be happy with how I am, and will perpetually be wanting to make me into something I'm not, and I'll be forced to cut them off completely when I'm able to.

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1 hour ago, CyborgKin said:

It hurts because my parents are quite sure the person I turned out to be is not at all the person the Lord wants me to become, and that really strains our relationship.  I can't see how they'll every be happy with how I am, and will perpetually be wanting to make me into something I'm not, and I'll be forced to cut them off completely when I'm able to.

Same here. I spent years trying to figure out why they couldn't accept me as I am. I finally realized their love was conditional and there wasn't a whole lot I could do about it. So, I lived my life my way, stayed true to myself and screw 'em. When the time came, I played the "dutiful daughter" even though it damn near destroyed me. I hate to say it but the day the mother died was the day I was free. Its been a little over 10 years and well, with a whole lot of therapy, I'm growing into who I was meant to be without regrets (well, there is one regret, y'all know what that one is). 

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So, the Pastor of the church in El Reno that Kory Bollinger was heavily involved in when he met Sarah is Rod Young.  The Young family is very involved with the church.  Dillon Young (wife Kynzi) is Youth Director. Braden Young (wife Kory) is worship Leader. Those are all paid positions, right?  So the extended Young family gets all or some of their income from church tithing.  Do they pay taxes on that or is it tax exempt because it is church related? Quite the “family business”.  

Don’t all of Korys siblings have names that start with “K”, so are those  ladies who married Young boys his sisters?  

Kory, along with some other men, were recently taped to be deacons for the church.  Is that a volunteer position or will he be paid for that?

Sarah has moved from one “family run” church (Dads nursing home church) to another one!

Edited by Hellothere
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2 hours ago, Hellothere said:

So, the Pastor of the church in El Reno that Kory Bollinger was heavily involved in when he met Sarah is Rod Young.  The Young family is very involved with the church.  Dillon Young (wife Kynzi) is Youth Director. Braden Young (wife Kory) is worship Leader. Those are all paid positions, right?  So the extended Young family gets all or some of their income from church tithing.  Do they pay taxes on that or is it tax exempt because it is church related? Quite the “family business”.  

Don’t all of Korys siblings have names that start with “K”, so are those  ladies who married Young boys his sisters?  

Kory, along with some other men, were recently taped to be deacons for the church.  Is that a volunteer position or will he be paid for that?

Sarah has moved from one “family run” church (Dads nursing home church) to another one!

If you have Braden Young's wife's name (Kory) right then she has the same name as Sarah's husband. Kory wouldn't have a sister Kory, but the other woman could be his sister. 

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Ah, that makes sense….wouldn’t have 2 Korys in a family.  Guess I was just befuddled by all the Ks, hah!  All the info about the Young’s is on the church’s website.

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I'm sure Sarah is HAPPY to be a housewife. She's happily married, possibly getting fertility treatments (I have no proof what-so-ever, just her age) I'm happy for her if this is really what she wants and I imagine it is. Plus he's a pastor, right? (With another job) It's like a BOGO at most churches. So while she's a "homemaker" she's really doing everything no one will volunteer for at church without a salary and filling in everywhere when a vounteer fails to show up. I came today just to see if she'd yet announced a pregnancy. I hope gets to have a baby if that's what she really wants.

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4 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

I'm sure Sarah is HAPPY to be a housewife. She's happily married, possibly getting fertility treatments (I have no proof what-so-ever, just her age) I'm happy for her if this is really what she wants and I imagine it is. Plus he's a pastor, right? (With another job) It's like a BOGO at most churches. So while she's a "homemaker" she's really doing everything no one will volunteer for at church without a salary and filling in everywhere when a vounteer fails to show up. I came today just to see if she'd yet announced a pregnancy. I hope gets to have a baby if that's what she really wants.

She may want to take it slow at first. She's been married less than 2 months.

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