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Lori Alexander 81: It's All the Fault of Women


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9 hours ago, Hane said:

@SunnySide, have you ever considered endometrial ablation? It’s like a high-tech D&C, in which your uterine lining is cauterized. It sounds brutal but isn’t—it saved my bacon when I was suffering from extremely heavy periods in my 40s. (I had had adverse effects from hormonal BC.) I went under general anesthesia at 1:30 PM, and by five I was putting on my jeans to go home. 

Thank you for sharing your experience and letting me know it isn’t so awful. I am so glad you found relief. I am in the process of having the procedure consulted on and then scheduled, so hopefully relief soon. Unfortunately in May I was once again left in medical limbo when I had to switch OB/GYN providers unexpectedly. Trigger warning for medical trauma and abuse warning in box.

Spoiler

After lots of back and forth with my care provider I was getting more confused and stressed with each appointment. A friend of mine is a nurse who started getting concerned when I explained some things to her, and called her crying and stressed out after every appointment. Long story short I was being mentally and physically abused by my physician. There is an actual criminal charge called medical battery and that’s all I’ll say for now. I’ll probably never see a doctor again without a witness in the room. 

 

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@SunnySide, I hope you find a good physician. Props for standing up for yourself!

After my ablation I was out of work for about a week and a half, but I had laparoscopic surgery to nuke out an ovary (endometrial tissue had stuck it to the side of my cervix) while I was under for the ablation. People I spoke with who had just the ablation had a far shorter recovery time. Like you, I was leery about the ablation, but my doctor asked a couple of his patients to connect with me to share their experiences.

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19 hours ago, SongRed7 said:

Lori is doubling down again on "you don't have to have any feelings for someone" in order to marry them. 

she might not need it but I would guess the majority of people need to have some feelings - even friendship before marriage!

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3 hours ago, quiversR4hunting said:

she might not need it but I would guess the majority of people need to have some feelings - even friendship before marriage!

Like  honestly, how do you have sex with some who you don't have even the least little bit of attraction, affection, friendship or anything beyond he's a good provider and she's a good housewife? 

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43 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

Like  honestly, how do you have sex with some who you don't have even the least little bit of attraction, affection, friendship or anything beyond he's a good provider and she's a good housewife? 

Ten minutes and some lube, that's how. Or, in Ken's case, likely only five minutes... 😏

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According to Lori, schools have career day in kindergarten???? Where is this happening? I work in elementary schools regularly, other than fire safety, the school resource officer (so they feel comfortable with him in an emergency) and a dentist to talk about how to take care of their teeth, there is no emphasis on careers. A lot of them still plan to be a dinosaur or some such thing when they put "what I want to be when I grow up" on posters or papers. And a lot of them put "a mommy" or "a daddy" on those, too. 

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On 9/22/2022 at 2:03 PM, SongRed7 said:

Like  honestly, how do you have sex with some who you don't have even the least little bit of attraction, affection, friendship or anything beyond he's a good provider and she's a good housewife? 

The same way other sex workers do, I imagine. 

Lori expects women to trade sex for money. The only difference between Lori and a prostitute is that Lori managed to get her one long-term client legally bound to her through marriage. 

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On 9/22/2022 at 8:03 PM, SongRed7 said:

Like  honestly, how do you have sex with some who you don't have even the least little bit of attraction, affection, friendship or anything beyond he's a good provider and she's a good housewife? 

Or, in Lori's case, an awful housewife.

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Has anyone checked out her latest video? She covers three topics: serving men first at family get togethers (full disclosure, we usually do that, but only to get the men out of the way lol), how only MEN lead the Sunday school  lessons at her church (but women can ask questions), and how her six year old granddaughter was evangelizing a neighborhood kid by telling her "she is full of sin and Satan and will burn in hell in damnation if she doesn't repent and love Jesus." (paraphrasing) she had a LOT of pushback even from Christians in the comments, but it looks like she has deleted them now.   Folks were saying it was inappropriate for a 6 year old to tell this to another six year old, and that if she wanted to talk about Jesus there were a million better ways to do it. 

Lori loved that her GD told that heathen she was going to hell. After all, Lori says in the video, it was "apparent they AREN'T Christians, you could just tell." She took glee in it almost. 

If my child came home and told me that another kid said that to her, I would be furious and I am a professioning/going to church/Jesus loving Christian. Ii would be marching over to the Alexander's  house quickly.

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On 9/26/2022 at 1:31 PM, SongRed7 said:

Lori loved that her GD told that heathen she was going to hell. After all, Lori says in the video, it was "apparent they AREN'T Christians, you could just tell." She took glee in it almost. 

I would really, really love to hear Lori describe exactly how she could "just tell" they aren't Christians. With details. Because the vast majority of people? You can't just look at them and tell what their religion is. With some, sure... Sikh, very orthodox Jewish people, Amish people, members of certain clergy perhaps. Women wearing hijab in a non-muslim-majority area, maybe. You might assume someone wearing a star of David is likely to be Jewish. Someone wearing a crucifix might maybe be Catholic, and someone wearing an empty cross might maybe be protestant, but either of them might also just like the aesthetic and niether is likely to meet Lori's requirements for being a "proper Christian". Largely because only Lori counts according to her. 

I suspect she could "just tell" because they weren't Lori or a member of Lori's family.

Highly unlikely this particular random six-year-old was wearing a pentacle or something. 

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29 minutes ago, Alisamer said:

I would really, really love to hear Lori describe exactly how she could "just tell" they aren't Christians. With details. Because the vast majority of people? You can't just look at them and tell what their religion is. With some, sure... Sikh, very orthodox Jewish people, Amish people, members of certain clergy perhaps. Women wearing hijab in a non-muslim-majority area, maybe. You might assume someone wearing a star of David is likely to be Jewish. Someone wearing a crucifix might maybe be Catholic, and someone wearing an empty cross might maybe be protestant, but either of them might also just like the aesthetic and niether is likely to meet Lori's requirements for being a "proper Christian". Largely because only Lori counts according to her. 

I suspect she could "just tell" because they weren't Lori or a member of Lori's family.

Highly unlikely this particular random six-year-old was wearing a pentacle or something. 

Evangelicals like to assume that no one else is Christian. Or at least the right kind of Christian. And even if someone is Christian, it probably doesn't really count unless they go to the evangelizer's church. Most of them tend to believe that their church is more Christian than even other evangelical churches. And it really gets ugly between the charismatics and non-charismatics. 

Source: Six years teaching at a Christian school where 60+ churches and 40+ denominations were represented. 

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The major point of this post is to encourage you, women, to now allow yourself to keep gaining weight

Bolded mine.

Thank you, Lori. I appreciate the permission to gain weight. I can assure you I will take full advantage of it!

 

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In her post about losing weight, she mentions what she eats each day.  

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I get up every morning and walk 40 minutes. Then I come home and make a protein shake with coconut milk, protein powder, frozen bananas and berries. I began eating this shake when my gut was bad from Covid and was having diarrhea every day. (I still gained five pounds even while having diarrhea every day!) I did have a stool test which showed I had H-pylori (which is common with Covid) and giardia (which is easy to get when you have H-pylori). I went on a three month natural treatment that cured it, thankfully.

I don't need to know about her diarrhea.  No one wants to hear about it.

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For lunch, I eat one slice of my sourdough bread with butter, sautéed onions, peppers, and mushrooms in ghee then scramble an egg in it. I put this on top of my bread with tomatoes. Sometimes, I will have a corn tortilla sautéed in ghee and melt raw, organic cheese on it then top with tomatoes.

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For dinner, I have a big salad with all kinds of vegetables, a protein (steak, sardines, chicken, or turkey), sauerkraut, avocado, sprouted pumpkin seeds, and anything else I feel like putting on it! I used to use my homemade salad dressing but my gut is still healing from the parasites so I just use extra virgin olive oil and balsamic vinegar.

She has a lot of veggies, but variety is good for proper nutrition.  I generally eat the same breakfast each weekday, and I rotate among a few of the same lunches, but I have more variety for dinner.  Her meals would not be enjoyable to me on a regular basis.  I need to live a little and enjoy my food.

She also mentioned that it took her five months to lose five pounds, and that she had been shocked when she weighed at a doctor's office and realized that she had put on those five pounds.  I know that losing weight is more difficult when a person is close to their desired weight, but it could have been helpful if she had changed things up a bit more.  

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At least she didn’t use the word “slathered” in that long, boring description of what she eats. 
 

And she’s finally given up on that salmonella salad dressing.   
 

Does she cook for Ken?  She always mentions what she eats, never we.  

 

 

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4 hours ago, crawfishgirl said:

I don't need to know about her diarrhea.  No one wants to hear about it.

If she's having intestinal distress, I would look at the following before blaming parasites and her "gut": 

  • food safety - lori doesn't clean properly, I doubt she knows the proper temperature to cook and serve chicken, and she doesn't think twice about reusing rags that touched chicken juice. 
  • The protein power + coconut milk 
  • The lunch which involves frying bread in butter, which is delicious, but just because it's called ghee doesn't mean it's not butter
  • the salad that's made once a week and allowed to decay in the fridge before eating. 

If she wants to lose weight, she could try double checking her portions, including the butter, the size of the dinner protein, and the amount of oil on her salad, and also the protein powder and coconut cream. Or she could give herself a break as she's on a steroid and some other medication and in her 60s. 

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I had a (very thin) grandmother (now passed away) who constantly ignored food safety. For her, I'm suspicious that the occasional diarrhea was actually a component of her weight loss/maintenance strategy. I wonder if Lori secretly enjoys similar 'benefits' of an unclean kitchen.

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1 hour ago, Pammy said:

I had a (very thin) grandmother (now passed away) who constantly ignored food safety. For her, I'm suspicious that the occasional diarrhea was actually a component of her weight loss/maintenance strategy. I wonder if Lori secretly enjoys similar 'benefits' of an unclean kitchen.

I remember so vividly the way I would eat at my grandmother's house and always have a "stomach ache" afterwards, even as a kid. Everyone loved her food so much but it was really bad. Just so much cheese, butter, heavy cream, and lack of food safety. My aunt on that side of the family was a family joke because of how bad she was about food safety. We're talking about buckets of flour just open in a drawer next to the trash compactor, scoop the bugs out if you care. Raw meat just sitting out on a platter for way too long. Vats of frying oil waiting to be tripped over and 3rd degree burns. We used to bring our own food for Thanksgiving, one year there were four turkeys which sounds like something out of a movie. 

I meant to mention that Lori's protein powder is most likely the culprit. Some are made to help you poop, some are made to stop you up. Bodybuilders (the main people that protein powder was marketed to and created for) have a lot of needs in the pooping department. 

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My MIL is a very thin (to be honest scrawny) tiny bird-like woman who is obsessed with her and everyone else's weight. She's the queen of the passive aggressive snipe - '"oh dear, are you going to eat that?"   She eats very little.  Has been known to go for several days without eating, just a cup of hot chocolate or coffee under the pretext of not being hungry.  Neither she nor anyone one else in her family of origin has ever been the least bit overweight.  Did I mention she has astronomical blood pressure her doctor can't regulate.  He's tried everything, every drug.  One will work for a while, then her pressure goes sky high and he starts all over.

Mr Dress tells me he spent his life at home being hungry. He perfected the art of silently sneaking into the kitchen to raid dry cereal late at night.  He went off to college weighing 120 lbs at 6 ft. When he returned at Christmas with the "freshman 10-15", his mother put him on a diet for all of Christmas break.

The first weekend I ever visited with Mr. Dress's parents when we were dating, unbeknownst to us there were no plans for food.  We flew in Fri night directly after work and were picked up at the airport. Off to their beach house.  We expected something, anything to eat as it was 8:30 by the time we got to the house. Nope, not even a glass of water.  Sat morning there was coffee (skim milk, no sugar) and 1/2 of a plain English muffin (no butter, no jam).  No lunch that day. Sat evening was a planned museum tour and reception. We assumed hors d' oeuvres at the reception ....... ummm ...... No.  Just punch and  few sparse plates of cookies for about 100 people.  We assumed dinner plans afterward.  Nope. Back to the house. 

Sun morning was black coffee, no sugar.  No muffins as we were told we ate them all on Sat.  Lunch time came and went.  Nothing.  By 2:00 we convinced his father we had to get to the airport for our flight.  We flat out lied and said the flight was at 4:30 (It was at 6:30). He drove us to the airport and dropped us off..  We waved goodbye and then literally sprinted to the food concession, which was all the small airport had. I think we ordered at least half of the menu, including the worst nachos ever -- stale chips with melted cheeze whiz. It was manna from heaven.

We never again visited without a car to make our getaway for dining out.

Edited by Red Hair, Black Dress
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Going OT to Lori’s traveling woes: Hey, Lori, I’m several years older than you are, and I just packed my bags and flew across the country for a week-long trip with no Big Strong Man to handle my luggage and make all my plans for me. I am enjoying the hell out of divorced life in my own private hotel room sans a headship cluttering up the joint.

Re kitchen-oriented gut troubles: Years ago, I switched over to plastic cutting boards that I could disinfect with bleach and chuck into the dishwasher. My stomach problems virtually disappeared.

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1 hour ago, Hane said:

Going OT to Lori’s traveling woes: Hey, Lori, I’m several years older than you are, and I just packed my bags and flew across the country for a week-long trip with no Big Strong Man to handle my luggage and make all my plans for me. I am enjoying the hell out of divorced life in my own private hotel room sans a headship cluttering up the joint.

 

Sounds like a great trip. I hope you have a wonderful time. 


Last August, my stepmother, age 81, got on a plane and flew here to see my new grandson. It was the first time she’d ever flown alone; but most previous trips have been with her many sisters. So, usually not a man around for them either. We were so touched that she did that and, I guess Lori would be…disappointed in her? 

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9 hours ago, Hane said:

Re kitchen-oriented gut troubles: Years ago, I switched over to plastic cutting boards that I could disinfect with bleach and chuck into the dishwasher. My stomach problems virtually disappeared.

My plastic and wooden cutting boards get bleach baths regularly. So do the wooden spoons I like to use. I'm a little weird, I like the smell of bleach. 

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13 hours ago, feministxtian said:

I like the smell of bleach. 

Me, too! Back in my college days many moons ago, I was a competitive synchronized swimmer. I spent hours and hours at the pool everyday during the season.  To this day I still enjoy/have fond memories of chlorine (and thus bleach as well).  LOL

 

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Travel update: The highlight of my trip is the Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta. Less than an hour ago, I touched down from my first hot air balloon ride! 

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On 9/22/2022 at 1:48 PM, Loveday said:

Ten minutes and some lube, that's how. Or, in Ken's case, likely only five minutes... 😏

I think, at the least, Lori has an attachment disorder where she is unable to feel connected to her husband and children in the way the rest of us feel attached to our family members.

On 10/4/2022 at 4:27 PM, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

My MIL is a very thin (to be honest scrawny) tiny bird-like woman who is obsessed with her and everyone else's weight. She's the queen of the passive aggressive snipe - '"oh dear, are you going to eat that?"   She eats very little.  Has been known to go for several days without eating, just a cup of hot chocolate or coffee under the pretext of not being hungry.  Neither she nor anyone one else in her family of origin has ever been the least bit overweight.  Did I mention she has astronomical blood pressure her doctor can't regulate.  He's tried everything, every drug.  One will work for a while, then her pressure goes sky high and he starts all over.

Mr Dress tells me he spent his life at home being hungry. He perfected the art of silently sneaking into the kitchen to raid dry cereal late at night.  He went off to college weighing 120 lbs at 6 ft. When he returned at Christmas with the "freshman 10-15", his mother put him on a diet for all of Christmas break.

The first weekend I ever visited with Mr. Dress's parents when we were dating, unbeknownst to us there were no plans for food.  We flew in Fri night directly after work and were picked up at the airport. Off to their beach house.  We expected something, anything to eat as it was 8:30 by the time we got to the house. Nope, not even a glass of water.  Sat morning there was coffee (skim milk, no sugar) and 1/2 of a plain English muffin (no butter, no jam).  No lunch that day. Sat evening was a planned museum tour and reception. We assumed hors d' oeuvres at the reception ....... ummm ...... No.  Just punch and  few sparse plates of cookies for about 100 people.  We assumed dinner plans afterward.  Nope. Back to the house. 

Sun morning was black coffee, no sugar.  No muffins as we were told we ate them all on Sat.  Lunch time came and went.  Nothing.  By 2:00 we convinced his father we had to get to the airport for our flight.  We flat out lied and said the flight was at 4:30 (It was at 6:30). He drove us to the airport and dropped us off..  We waved goodbye and then literally sprinted to the food concession, which was all the small airport had. I think we ordered at least half of the menu, including the worst nachos ever -- stale chips with melted cheeze whiz. It was manna from heaven.

We never again visited without a car to make our getaway for dining out.

Very interesting little visit in a food disordered sort of way!

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