Katie & Travis 4: Still under the Umbrella of Patriarchy

[anjulibai]

Erin and Aaron have completely different etymologies. Erin is the Irish name for Ireland. Aaron is Hebrew. I've known a few of each. 

Both of my sons have top 10 names, and ones that have been in the top ten for probably as long as there have been stats kept on it. But it doesn't seem to me like they are surrounded by kids with the same names. Maybe one or two here or there, but mostly they are the only ones.  

Edited October 5, 2022 by anjulibai

[SassyPants]

3 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Erin and Aaron have completely different etymologies. Erin is the Irish name for Ireland. Aaron is Hebrew. I've known a few of each. 

Both of my sons have top 10 names, and ones that have been in the top ten for probably as long as there have been stats kept on it. But it doesn't seem to me like they are surrounded by kids with the same names. Maybe one or two here or there, but mostly they are the only ones.  

My son too. He has a very traditional, family name that is always among the most popular. He is 32… and in middle school there were several others with the same name, but not before or since.

Edited October 6, 2022 by SassyPants

[Dbm]

On instagram people are talking about the first post travis made and then deleted for Katie's birthday (he posted another one after that), anyone have any clue about it ? what did it contain ?

[JermajestyDuggar]

37 minutes ago, Dbm said:

On instagram people are talking about the first post travis made and then deleted for Katie's birthday (he posted another one after that), anyone have any clue about it ? what did it contain ?

It was full of silly and bad pics of Katie. Which was actually quite different from the usual Bates pictures. I think the Bateses are extremely overly curated and perfect. They bore me to death. So I did notice when he actually posted a bunch of silly and imperfect pics of her. 

[displayname]

They weren't even "unflattering" goofy pics, widening her eyes and a silly frown.

[Alysabeth]

I just went back and looked. I’m sure the original post included a list of 22 (or however many years old she is) things he loves about her. The new post just includes your standard one line happy birthday message. I’m not sure why he deleted the previous one - it seemed more personal*.  Very odd. 
 

* I say personal but from what a recall the list was very generic - you’re funny, you’re beautiful etc. 

[Tdoc72]

I wonder if they signed a prenup. She might be the only Bates/in-law that has some assets. I could see her parents recommending it but I also think Lawson might balk. “Marriage is forever” and all that jazz. 

[Bluebirdbluebell]

46 minutes ago, Tdoc72 said:

I wonder if they signed a prenup. She might be the only Bates/in-law that has some assets. I could see her parents recommending it but I also think Lawson might balk. “Marriage is forever” and all that jazz. 

Most people get upset about prenups, because it seems cynical and unromantic. I doubt any Bates signed one.  

[indianabones]

2 hours ago, Tdoc72 said:

I wonder if they signed a prenup. She might be the only Bates/in-law that has some assets. I could see her parents recommending it but I also think Lawson might balk. “Marriage is forever” and all that jazz. 

Why would anyone from a group of people who believe that divorce is never, ever an option sign a prenup?

[SassyPants]

16 minutes ago, indianabones said:

Why would anyone from a group of people who believe that divorce is never, ever an option sign a prenup?

Because money is more important than anything else. Just ask JB Duggar!

[indianabones]

4 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Because money is more important than anything else. Just ask JB Duggar!

Lol, I quoted you assuming you were talking about Katie since that's the topic we're in. I missed the part where you mentioned Lawson. I can totally see Tiffany's parents talking her into getting a prenup (especially since they're both on the second marriages).

Katie and Travis, on the other hand... nah.

[Tdoc72]

Sorry!  I started the prenup talk but I thought I was in Law&Tiff’s thread. Not sure what, how, or why that happened, but I was definitely talking about L&T.  I don’t think Katie or Trav would even think about it. 

[Vivi_music]

On 10/3/2022 at 9:15 PM, Mama Mia said:

I really noticed this with the kids in my family, there are a good number who were given names that were thought to be fairly uncommon, but not completely unheard of — and turned out to have a multitude of peers with their names. This was pre-internet and social media, which makes the spread more interesting to me. Like how do you hear of 1 or 2 people with a name the entire time you’re growing up, or just have read it in a book or in a movie —-but then 20 years later the name is one of 3 in your kids class? Fascinating. 
But a couple of the names that seemed more common for the area and era— not one other child with the name in the school.

I remember reading a sociology study about name trends back in college, when I took a class called ''sociology of the family''. It was more of a light read but interesting nonetheless. Basically, what you described is exactly how trends usually emerge. Parents usually try to find names they haven't heard a lot (so that usually rules out names that were popular when they grew up). They gravitate towards names that are original, something old that can be made new, but not too old that it's weird, nor to original that the kid will be subject to mocking or ridicule. With these criteria in mind, without realizing, parents who have never met or talked end up choosing from a narrower pool of names.

I wish I could find the paper again. It was a fun read.

[JermajestyDuggar]

13 minutes ago, Vivi_music said:

I remember reading a sociology study about name trends back in college, when I took a class called ''sociology of the family''. It was more of a light read but interesting nonetheless. Basically, what you described is exactly how trends usually emerge. Parents usually try to find names they haven't heard a lot (so that usually rules out names that were popular when they grew up). They gravitate towards names that are original, something old that can be made new, but not too old that it's weird, nor to original that the kid will be subject to mocking or ridicule. With these criteria in mind, without realizing, parents who have never met or talked end up choosing from a narrower pool of names.

I wish I could find the paper again. It was a fun read.

Yes, I’ve seen this in real life. My kids go to school with multiple Charlies. Because 10 years ago, it wasn’t crazy popular to name your kid Charles. So a bunch of middle class white people in my area started naming their baby boys Charles. And now there are quite a few all similar in age. 

[CanadianMamam]

I have noticed from Katie's YouTube videosz the subtle ways being baby #11 affected her (that she probably doesn't even realize). She was commenting about taking photos to document every take stage because she wants Hailey to have those photos, how she wants to preserve her dress for Hailey if she wants it, and other things. She said something about making Hailey always know how loved she is and I wonder if Katie even realizes where that feeling is coming from. 

I also found the nursery decision interesting as Katie was pushing for a crib they could reuse and Travis wanted full canopy and princess and said they can figure out another crib later if needed. Gender roles aside (Travis wanting to go full princess) it isn't the first time that their different financial backgrounds have come up. For the Jersey Shore vacation, Travis commented that Katie had a hard time choosing a bike and she pointed out that in her family you never get to choose anything and you just hope by the time it gets to you, it isn't falling apart. 

[SassyPants]

Oh Buddy…get more neutral furniture and go all out on the bedding for each kid.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Katie has already said they would only have 3 or 4. The Clarks obviously aren’t quiverful. That was likely part of the appeal to Katie. 

[SassyPants]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Katie has already said they would only have 3 or 4. The Clarks obviously aren’t quiverful. That was likely part of the appeal to Katie. 

I find it so gratifying when these folks, as adults, have that lightbulb moment and realize how their lives could have been had their parents exercised a bit of common sense in the area of reproduction. At the same time, if they had, many of these kids would never have been born. Now make better choices. Don’t be like Tori or Kendra. Those ladies have been reduced to a uterus, and their offspring a number in a line up. It’s inhumane.

[0 kids n not countin]

2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I find it so gratifying when these folks, as adults, have that lightbulb moment and realize how their lives could have been had their parents exercised a bit of common sense in the area of reproduction. At the same time, if they had, many of these kids would never have been born. Now make better choices. Don’t be like Tori or Kendra. Those ladies have been reduced to a uterus, and their offspring a number in a line up. It’s inhumane.

I would include Michaela and Erin in this group as well,  I have no doubt they would also be continually pregnant if they didn't have infertility and health issues.

[SassyPants]

13 minutes ago, 0 kids n not countin said:

I would include Michaela and Erin in this group as well,  I have no doubt they would also be continually pregnant if they didn't have infertility and health issues.

I do feel a bit of sadness for M and Brandon. I’d like to take one kid from Tori and give s/he to them, or rather, if I were in charge, M would have gotten to birth 1 and Tori one less. 

[HideousGreenShirt]

lol Travis, you're never going to answer the real assumptions:

What are fj's assumptions about these two? His family is rich, controlling and the men are scary creeps. Katie will never get a real job. Katie is miserable and wants to move back to TN. The no-touch courtship was a Clark family decision. What'd I miss? Let's make bingo squares! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

lol Travis, you're never going to answer the real assumptions:

What are fj's assumptions about these two? His family is rich, controlling and the men are scary creeps. Katie will never get a real job. Katie is miserable and wants to move back to TN. The no-touch courtship was a Clark family decision. What'd I miss? Let's make bingo squares! 

I’m sure their answers will make us all roll our eyes a lot. They will act like they are big grown ups who make all their own decisions and have money because they are hard workers. Not because Josie grew up on tv and Travis comes from money and works for his family 🙄

[JermajestyDuggar]

They picked the very lightest pink possible to paint Hailey’s room. Which is no surprise. They are the blandest couple on all of FJ. But at least it’s not white! That’s a little progress. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Who wants to watch this? I know I can’t. I have an extremely hard time listening to 2 very young and very privileged white couples who don’t think they are privileged. And I have a feeling they won’t admit how privileged they are. It will make me want to rip my hair out. So someone else will have to watch. It’s like Braggie. She’s so privileged and will never acknowledge or admit it.

[CanadianMamam]

I'm watching. They aren't shying away from some of the mean questions (Katie seemed genuinely hurt by the assumption that she is a snob). They deny that Travis's family pays for everything, Travis says he considered moving to Tennessee when she was unhappy and she says she loves Jersey now (I think she prefers his family to hers) and they acknowledge that the adjustment period was rough and Katie says it was the new state, new friends, new home, etc. They also say they used birth control and got pregnant with Hailey the first cycle they went off.

Travis would apparently like to make music full time and be a church worship leader. They also acknowledge that social media is the source of most of their income and they actually stated they know they are lucky to make an income off it and that the pros outweigh the cons (the mean comments/assumptions).

The previous relationships question was interesting, because Travis and Katie obviously disagree about her past dating history. she said he was her first official relationship, he points out there were lots of suitors/interest. 

Katie thinks she is a good driver, Travis does not. 

They do seem way more comfortable together than in the early months of their marriage.