Lina's barf worthy 1 month anniversary post

[kayray]

Lina is the real-life faux-Jewish version of Bella Swan. Constantly patting herself on the back for being so0o0o0o hard-working, smug, vastly overestimating her intelligence... not to mention in a relationship with a sparkly vampire creepy motherfucker who stalked her and wouldn't have sex with her until marriage, regardless of what she wanted.

I admit I'm a tad surprised she's not already pregnant with a noticeable baby bump and considering naming the baby Taliban Tony Jr.

I have not seen/read Twilight (well, I tried to read it and could not get past the first chapter without feeling sick) but I totally snorted at this (in a good way!).

[emmyfair]

Kat, add a five year old to the mix, with an opinion on flipping everything, and that's my day - thank goodness for kindergarten!

Lina is in for a rude awakening. She deserves it.

[StarrieEyedKat]

Kat, add a five year old to the mix, with an opinion on flipping everything, and that's my day - thank goodness for kindergarten!

Lina is in for a rude awakening. She deserves it.

I'm looking into daycares for next year, CAN'T WAIT!

[Kitty]

I have not seen/read Twilight (well, I tried to read it and could not get past the first chapter without feeling sick) but I totally snorted at this (in a good way!).

:D

It took me forever to read Twilight. I checked it out of the library in high school, had about 2 weeks to read it. I read it only because all of my friends hyped it like crazy (fortunately, all of those friends snark on it now). I read the first 12 pages, and tossed it aside. 13 days later I was all "oh shit, this book is due back tomorrow!" and I didn't want to return a book to the library unfinished, so I stayed up to finish it. The only reason I read the rest of the "saga" :roll: is because I was hoping Laurent and Victoria would return. First time I ever liked the villains that much more than the heroes.

Lina totally sounds like Bella to me, as do other fundiewives. But Lina is a little closer to Bella than most, I think.

[onlyorganic]

I'm sorry... but THIS life spits in the face of the hardworking women of The Bible who Lina is trying oh-so-hard to emulate... Imagine biblical times... meat to slaughter and dress, a garden to tend, water to lug, clothing to sew and wash by HAND... rodents in the home... a long-ass walk to market. Lina is seriously the laziest person alive and she can't even see it. I worry if TT gets his jollies on knowing she's at home doing jack sh*t except things to please him, because if Lina was my wife I'd drop her ass off at Target and make her apply for a j-o-b. And not Job, like in the Bible... A FREAKING WAY TO CONTRIBUTE TO SOCIETY! She is doing nothing... literally nothing to contribute to society at all. At least TT pays for her...

Seriously, she has no babies to raise currently, she had a teeny-tiny apartment to clean. You'd think she could at least do some volunteer work other than sit on her duff and type about how busy and blissful it is to have time as a stay-at-home wife to learn her role and memorize the things TT likes. I wish she could hear how pathetic she sounds.

[Kitty]

I'm sorry... but THIS life spits in the face of the hardworking women of The Bible who Lina is trying oh-so-hard to emulate... Imagine biblical times... meat to slaughter and dress, a garden to tend, water to lug, clothing to sew and wash by HAND... rodents in the home... a long-ass walk to market. Lina is seriously the laziest person alive and she can't even see it. I worry if TT gets his jollies on knowing she's at home doing jack sh*t except things to please him, because if Lina was my wife I'd drop her ass off at Target and make her apply for a j-o-b. And not Job, like in the Bible... A FREAKING WAY TO CONTRIBUTE TO SOCIETY! She is doing nothing... literally nothing to contribute to society at all. At least TT pays for her...

Seriously, she has no babies to raise currently, she had a teeny-tiny apartment to clean. You'd think she could at least do some volunteer work other than sit on her duff and type about how busy and blissful it is to have time as a stay-at-home wife to learn her role and memorize the things TT likes. I wish she could hear how pathetic she sounds.

Fuck, if that was me I'd start washing my clothes by hand just to have something to do with myself. Or, you know, get a freaking job. Like most people do.

[Sola]

Is it wrong that I want to head over her 'sweet home' and give her a good slap?

*swearing alert*

Lina, you are a lazy fucker. Let's see, what have you done since leaving school? Oh attended a few classes at your local college. You have done a days work in your life. All you do all day is blog and chat to friends online, wash a few dishes, spend a short time preparing meals for two, push a vacuum cleaner around (which with only the two of you doesn't need to be done every day) and wash TT skiddies.

Get a fucking job. Any job. Doesn't matter what. If you have some aversion to contributing financially to your marriage then do some voluntary work. You are no special fucking snowflake, you are a young woman perfectly capable of getting off your backside and doing some work. Quite frankly your whole outlook on life from your days as a stay at home daughter (and why the fuck your parents didn't make you get off your backside is beyond me) to your new life as a stay at home wife is as irritating as hell.

Anyway, sorry for the sweary rant ladies (and gents). This sort of thing annoys the hell out of me, I have worked since I got my first paper round at 13 years old, through college and university and kids. I keep my house clean, my kids clean and my husband valued. I don't want a medal but neither do I want to hear from some know-it-all kid how wonderful married life is when she does fuck all and has been married for a month.

/rant

/bad day

[anniebgood]

My husband of 25+ years refers to me as "my wife" even when he's talking to friends. It bugs the holy shit out of me and I asked him once if he forgot my name? I don't know where it came from. Perhaps when he was in the Cult of Amway they taught him to do that, I don't know.

I am a SAHW but my kids are adults and even though they live at home, I expect them to take care of them selves.I cook, clean and make tasty desserts, but there have been days when the disability starts making itself known and I need help.

Lina, I don't do my husbands tighty whitey nugget holders anymore. He prefers to do his own laundry, which is fine with me. It's like he does things his way and if not done that way he pouts. Yes, I know, after all these years I should be a docile loving wife, but hey, he's capable.

Go out and take a walk, get a cat ( are pets kosher?), take an online class to occupy your time (comparative religions comes to mind) and don't just sit there inhaling your candle scents.

[Guest Anonymous]

Lina get a grip TT has a name he's not g-d, you can use it when you write.

I'm a slack elder, it doesn't take much to clean a one bedroom apt, and I have candles and incense to give my home any fragrance I choose. Pumpkin and cinnamon tend to close my throat.

You need to get a life, when my DD was 19 she had finally given up her 3 part time jobs to work full time at one. She built a wonderful career for herself. You should give it a try, perhaps work at a preschool, or volunteer at the local Jewish day school and get some hands on child care experience. After all you're going to be pumping kids out until your womb closes.

[emmiedahl]

I have a few Bible verses for Lina. Sorry, I searched the first Bible that came up on Google so this is not the Jewish numbering.

Proverbs 14:23

All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.

Proverbs 12:11

He who works his land will have abundant food, but he who chases fantasies lacks judgment.

Proverbs 28:19

He who works his land will have abundant food, but the one who chases fantasies will have his fill of poverty

Proverbs 31 (misc parts)

She gets up while it is still dark;

she provides food for her family

and portions for her servant girls.

She considers a field and buys it;

out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She sets about her work vigorously;

her arms are strong for her tasks.

She sees that her trading is profitable,

and her lamp does not go out at night.

In her hand she holds the distaff

and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

She opens her arms to the poor

and extends her hands to the needy.

...she does not eat the bread of idleness.

Ecclesiastes 9:10

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.

In other words, Lina get a job sayeth the Lord.

[fundiefan]

She has no choice but to be someone's 'help meet'. She couldn't cut it in real life. This morning by the time I left for work at 7:45, I did a load of wash, showered & dressed for the day, made & ate breakfast, made my lunch to take to work, put a roast into the slow cooker with veggies for meals for me for the week, and paid my phone bill online.

After 8 hours of work, I came home, changed into my comfy sweats, ate dinner, cut up the roast into single servings for the freezer & dinner a few more days this week, cleaned the kitchen, started the dishwasher and took out the garbage. Now, I'm just sitting down for email and web browsing. At 7, I am going to take my niece to dance class since my sister is out of town with her older daughter and my brother in law is at work. While she dances from 7:15 until 8:15 I'll probably hit up Target & Sams for a few necessities.

All a pretty normal day, nothing special or extra busy compared to any other day. I'll probably make it to bed around 10 to read for an hour before going to sleep and getting up at 5:30 tomorrow, as always, again, and living another day doing real things in real life.

When I was married, I did even more on any given day. Especially the years I was working full time and going to school.

She's a lazy little girl who is either unwilling or unable to function in real life with real obligations and do real things. She kind of belongs in her little apartment because she'd be a danger, to herself and others, in the real world. Most people I know don't have time or patience for people who need to coddled and do all they can to not be the ones responsible for their own lives.

[onlyorganic]

I have a few Bible verses for Lina. Sorry, I searched the first Bible that came up on Google so this is not the Jewish numbering.

Proverbs 14:23

All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.

Proverbs 12:11

He who works his land will have abundant food, but he who chases fantasies lacks judgment.

Proverbs 28:19

He who works his land will have abundant food, but the one who chases fantasies will have his fill of poverty

Proverbs 31 (misc parts)

She gets up while it is still dark;

she provides food for her family

and portions for her servant girls.

She considers a field and buys it;

out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She sets about her work vigorously;

her arms are strong for her tasks.

She sees that her trading is profitable,

and her lamp does not go out at night.

In her hand she holds the distaff

and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

She opens her arms to the poor

and extends her hands to the needy.

...she does not eat the bread of idleness.

Ecclesiastes 9:10

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.

In other words, Lina get a job sayeth the Lord.

I love you emmiedahl! Also, I'd love for someone to explain to me how the fundie girls read Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 and see how it reads that a woman should be at home cooking meals from scratch and being a dog to her husband. Anyone? Anyone? I read the verses and see how people in these times worked way harder than we do now with our modern conveniences and technology. I don't see the stay-at-home-and-be-nothing-more-than-a-doormat interpretation as being correct.

[Austin]

I am currently in the least-hectic time of my life ever, and I'm about 17 times busier than Lina.

18-22 - Full time college student plus worked 30 or more hours a week in retail mgmt plus got married & set up housekeeping

22-26 - Graduated college, found employment in my field, career-building, worked as many hours as possible to save for house, bought house

26-36 - First baby then twin babies arrive. Three little ones three and under at one point. Adjust to being SAHM and raising kids, days full of diapers, meal prep, cleaning, nurturing, laundry, financial mgmt, taking children to playgroup, tumbling, swim lessons, art & crafts classes, library circle, blah, blah, blah.

36 - Present - All kids in school, so back to work. I have to work my way up to the top as employers act like I've been sitting in a cave for the last 10 years and have forgotten or lost every skillset I ever had. Working hard, long hours to prove myself again, and it takes three years for me to achieve the same level and earning power I had before SAHM. Evenings are full of school work, school & community activities, speech & other therapies for neuro-atypical child, plus aforementioned meal prep, cleaning, etc, etc.

Present: Youngest children are seniors in high school, have jobs and activities of their own (not to mention girlfriends) and drive themselves around. Husband and I are often the only ones home for dinner, so meal prep has lessened dramatically. Still doing lots of laundry, some cleaning, handling all finances and home management plus work full-time in a position that is somewhat laid back and flexible with some exceptions. With the help of my able mechanic, keep five vehicles in safe, working order so aforementioned young adult children can get to their school, jobs, and activities (and girlfriends). Active in the community and politically, and making more time for my husand and my friends, particularly BFF. This period feels like a vacation compared to the previous 20 years and I'm really enjoying it.

I have never had the experience of my day consisting of sitting around in my pj's, lighting some candles, washing some underwear and running an errand. Thank god. I'd be bored stiff.

[Jessica]

I love you emmiedahl! Also, I'd love for someone to explain to me how the fundie girls read Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 and see how it reads that a woman should be at home cooking meals from scratch and being a dog to her husband. Anyone? Anyone? I read the verses and see how people in these times worked way harder than we do now with our modern conveniences and technology. I don't see the stay-at-home-and-be-nothing-more-than-a-doormat interpretation as being correct.

They would tell you that that's because you must be some kind of liberal feminist and if you think you're saved, you really aren't because if you were you wouldn't think like that.

[ChunkyBarbie]

I was innocently perusing Lina's FB and read a post by TT's mom. Apparently, Love used to throw the family's cats off the 12 foot high deck. Animal abuse is a major red flag. Wake up Lina!

[Jessica]

I have never had the experience of my day consisting of sitting around in my pj's, lighting some candles, washing some underwear and running an errand. Thank god. I'd be bored stiff.

I have and it is the most BORING thing I've ever done! I had quit my job to help a "friend" by being a nanny for her newborn. 3 weeks into it she decides she'll use the daycare on base instead (she and her husband were both in the military). Teh Hubz and I were going to be moving in 2 months so I couldn't take any classes or get a job (I applied to several). That apartment (a whopping 390 square foot 1-bedroom apartment) was spotless, I was knitting and reading like crazy, and bored out of my mind! When we moved out here to Utah I found a job right away and worked until 2 weeks before my due date. Now I'm a stay-at-home mom and even now most days are pretty boring so I'm thinking of going and taking a couple classes next year and eventually getting a degree. But man, if I didn't have my son I'd have to get a job or my brain would melt from boredom!

[Shirley MacLaine]

I have never had the experience of my day consisting of sitting around in my pj's, lighting some candles, washing some underwear and running an errand. Thank god. I'd be bored stiff.

I'm doing that now, and I'm not going to lie - I totally dig it. Or I would, if not for the brainmelting pressure of the job hunt.

I genuinely love working even the crappy jobs I always get (and it's good for my self-esteem/wallet) but I could probably dig on a life of leisure.

[lizzy]

Can I complain about being busy too? I don't have any kids, but I do work two jobs, do all of the cooking from scratch, and even make fall desserts for my husband on occasion. I guess I'm not much of a help-meet.

[emmiedahl]

I'd love for someone to explain to me how the fundie girls read Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 and see how it reads that a woman should be at home cooking meals from scratch and being a dog to her husband. Anyone? Anyone? I read the verses and see how people in these times worked way harder than we do now with our modern conveniences and technology. I don't see the stay-at-home-and-be-nothing-more-than-a-doormat interpretation as being correct.

I have always interpreted Proverbs 31 as telling women *not* to live the lifestyle that most fundies advocate. I get really steamed reading blogs that say "clearly the Bible says" women are to keep at home. You don't run a trade business and deal in real estate like the Proverbs 31 woman that way. :roll: Really, if people want to stay at home and not work or go to school, that's fine. Just stop telling me it is a morally superior lifestyle.

Having children will definitely liven up her life a bit. I can't wait. I just.cannot.wait. until this "delicate" bitch has to get out of her kosher little bed in the middle of the night. I have a feeling she'll be seriously into baby sleep training though.

[skankbiscuit]

I was innocently perusing Lina's FB and read a post by TT's mom. Apparently, Love used to throw the family's cats off the 12 foot high deck. Animal abuse is a major red flag. Wake up Lina!

OMG. What the hell? And to think I hated him before :x He is seriously gonna hurt Lina and/or their children. :cry:

[Kitty]

I was innocently perusing Lina's FB and read a post by TT's mom. Apparently, Love used to throw the family's cats off the 12 foot high deck. Animal abuse is a major red flag. Wake up Lina!

:shock:

[ChunkyBarbie]

OMG. What the hell? And to think I hated him before :x He is seriously gonna hurt Lina and/or their children. :cry:

Apparently, his mom thinks it funny or something. Scary and stupid people.

[skankbiscuit]

The saddest thing of all is that Lina KNEW something wasn't right about him, and ignored her good initial judgement. I am truly concerned for her safety.

[fundiefan]

...and those who wash their husbands' undies while thinking holy thoughts, possibly in Hebrew.

Cut her some slack (okay, I know FJs are not in the habit of cutting slack, but still). She's still playing house and in full happy-bride mode - it's bound to change. At least she hasn't been doling out advice on marriage, childrearing and divorce.

When I was in happy bride mode, I still got up in the morning and went to my job. I had a ton of thank-you notes to write. I had to change all my documentation which required a thousand miles of driving since this was before the Internet and ease of access to forms and information. The ex and I lived in a 3 bedroom, 2,000 square foot house on 6 acres of land, so I had more than enough housework and yard work to do. After work, I'd paint walls or refinish woodwork or help the ex install the laminate flooring in the kitchen, or whatever else we needed / chose to do.

We were in lovey-dovey mode, to be sure. We still functioned in the real world though.

Of course, by the time I got married I was used to hard work. I didn't live off mommy & daddy after high school waiting for a man to sweep me off my feet a year later. I got a job, then another job, then a better job. The ex and I were both financially functional & used to supporting ourselves when we met so buying that 3 bedroom house before our marriage was do-able.

I'd cut slack for the lovey-dovey talk. The rest is nothing more than a lazy little girl who doesn't know a thing about life, adulthood, responsibilities or even her own claimed religion.

[Witsec1]

Apparently, his mom thinks it funny or something. Scary and stupid people.

Can you screen-shot it for posterity?