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Jana Duggar 13: I Don't Think She Will :(


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55 minutes ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

She doesn't have many good options left. 

I would say in her current situation and within her current circle of friends, this is true, but as someone above mentioned with regards to the Maxwells, circumstances, times, decisions and finally outcomes can change. 

Edited by SassyPants
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I spent far too much time analysising the guy in Laura's instagram story because his facial hair made me think it could be Stephen. 

 

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I do wonder if they’re keeping everything very, very quiet because Pest’s future isn’t settled yet and they’ll plan any events based the outcome of a plea/trial. Imagine having to put your life on hold to accommodate your criminal brother…

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2 hours ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

I do wonder if they’re keeping everything very, very quiet because Pest’s future isn’t settled yet and they’ll plan any events based the outcome of a plea/trial. Imagine having to put your life on hold to accommodate your criminal brother…

I think at her age this isn't likely.  With each day that passes I think it's more likely that if there was something between them it's in the past,  unless they literally make the first announcement be that they ARE married.  With her about to be 32, in their circles, a courtship simply wouldn't go on for this long.

I do think assuming this is off, her chances of marrying or at least of marrying anyone 'decent' (as if such a thing exists) within their circles is very low, but I don't feel bad for her in any way whatsoever. Even leaving aside that not marrying is probably the best thing that could happen to her by any rational standard,  she is an adult now and has made and continues to make choices. The results of them are hers to live with,  as they are for all of us when we make our own choices.

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At this point, I think a courtship between Jana and Stephan Wissman is unlikely. I don't think Jana is in any courtship right now and I don't even think she is looking for one. I think she is satisfied with her life as is. We see none of the pining to be married we saw in people like Alison Bontrager and she certainly is not lamenting about this "season of life" like so many other fundie girls.  While her life is not what I'd choose, the alternative ie fundie marriage followed by as many pregnancies as possible seems like the worse option to me. 

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3 hours ago, browngrl said:

At this point, I think a courtship between Jana and Stephan Wissman is unlikely. I don't think Jana is in any courtship right now and I don't even think she is looking for one. I think she is satisfied with her life as is. We see none of the pining to be married we saw in people like Alison Bontrager and she certainly is not lamenting about this "season of life" like so many other fundie girls.  While her life is not what I'd choose, the alternative ie fundie marriage followed by as many pregnancies as possible seems like the worse option to me. 

I agree with you and everyone saying that her remaining single might well be the better and more fulfilling option at this stage, particularly as she clearly hasn't met anyone who offers enough to make marriage desirable to her. But we also don't know if she's satisfied or not.

Allison Bontrager is such a different personality - she comes over as industrious, keen to lead/instruct/influence (however a fundie maiden would phrase that), and very enthusiastic about showcasing her life, at least pre-marriage. If we don't see Jana going through the same obvious agonies Allison did about waiting for a husband in God's time etc etc etc, it doesn't mean it didn't happen. She just isn't the type to share her feelings publicly like that; she doesn't share any of her life really, whereas Allison is/was always very ready with her thoughts and ideas.

The absence of a positive isn't a negative, basically. We really don't know how Jana feels, and while I think it's possible-to-likely that she's more at peace with being long-term single than Allison was, she has certainly been fed the same line, that a godly husband is a reward for living will. I got the sense that Allison always felt that her good deeds were 'earning' her a good marriage, that she was assiduous in doing what God guided her towards because if she did everything right, He would give her what she wanted. I really don't mean that in any cynical way, but I think that she always strives to be exemplary and has quite a set idea of how to do that. The Duggar girls will have been brought up similarly.

Allison and Jana might also differ in that Allison possibly wanted marriage more than she wanted the perfect man. Her wedding video really didn't show great chemistry between her and Jeremiah (whatever happened behind closed doors, it was like she was begging him with her eyes for a perfect performative romantic moment that he was just never going to give her), and from what little info she's shared since then, it seems like marriage has been much much harder than she expected. SUPPOSING that Jana and Stephen Wissman really were courting, I think if Jana were more like Allison she wouldn't have let him go. She must know this is her last chance saloon, and if that's the case then no, she doesn't want it enough. But we don't know that this hasn't distressed her, or that she's satisfied with the status quo. She's just way more cautious than Allison or her own sisters. A lot of that will come from having been head sister-mom, and v much embedded on the 'adult' side of household organisation since a very young age.

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My guess is that Jana and Stephen were courting but have broken up. I get the feeling that Stephen was ready to get engaged but Jana needed a little more time. She doesn't strike me as someone who will accept another getting pushy. 

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Do the Duggars have cows? Jana is somewhere with cows. And Laura was in a plane yesterday. I am not 100% Jana and Stephen are done. 

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39 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

Do the Duggars have cows? Jana is somewhere with cows. And Laura was in a plane yesterday. I am not 100% Jana and Stephen are done. 

Nor am I. 

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She made it very obvious in the pictures at the resale place that there is nothing on her left hand

Yes they have posted tons of pictures near their home in AR of cows

 

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In years past, the Duggar girls have been photographed with cows in the background. One time, didn’t they even stop and help the cows cross the road and enter a pasture?

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3 hours ago, MaryOrMartha said:

When Jana has been spotted with Stephen.... has Laura been there also? Could it be that Laura is the one dating Stephen!?

It's possible, but unlikely. Laura is even older than Jana so it's a bigger age gap and her family may not be fundie enough for the Wissmans although maybe Laura is.

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10 hours ago, MaryOrMartha said:

When Jana has been spotted with Stephen.... has Laura been there also? Could it be that Laura is the one dating Stephen!?

I did consider this. Since my most recent maybe Stephen picture was from Laura's instagram.

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15 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

I did consider this. Since my most recent maybe Stephen picture was from Laura's instagram.

What picture was that? I missed it 

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I wish Laura and Jana would get an apartment together and live a fun single life together. Away from the Duggars.

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1 hour ago, kbohn23 said:

What picture was that? I missed it 

It could literally be anyone lol. But the facial hair reminded me of Stephen. But it could literally be any dude, I know that. 

Screenshot_20211007-212838.png

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Yeah, this "courtship", if it existed at all or it did and didn't work out, has gone on so long that likely they would be married by now.   Engagements are typically short and honestly I think if she wanted to be married, the outcome of the Pest's trial wouldn't be a reason to wait IMHO. 

I think a lot of us want to see Jana get some sort of life away from her family after spending so much of her life living in the TTH.  I get it.   Marriage, while one way do this, might not be what she really wants.  Maybe she's managed to carve out some degree of independence (like being allowed to travel for example) that might not be possible if she got married.   Maybe she has truly weighed the pros/cons and decided that her life is fine as it is. 

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1 hour ago, nokidsmom said:

Yeah, this "courtship", if it existed at all or it did and didn't work out, has gone on so long that likely they would be married by now.   Engagements are typically short and honestly I think if she wanted to be married, the outcome of the Pest's trial wouldn't be a reason to wait IMHO. 

I think a lot of us want to see Jana get some sort of life away from her family after spending so much of her life living in the TTH.  I get it.   Marriage, while one way do this, might not be what she really wants.  Maybe she's managed to carve out some degree of independence (like being allowed to travel for example) that might not be possible if she got married.   Maybe she has truly weighed the pros/cons and decided that her life is fine as it is. 

I mean, DuggarData had them down for an engagement this month, so who knows? I mean I know it's not exact but it also hasn't been that long, less than a year. 

And I could see her waiting for the pest's trial simply because this is something that is herd and is a big deal and she might not want it overahadowed.

Edited by CanadianMamam
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1 hour ago, CanadianMamam said:

It could literally be anyone lol. But the facial hair reminded me of Stephen. But it could literally be any dude, I know that. 

Screenshot_20211007-212838.png

Mystery Dude looks like he's wearing a J&J Services shirt, which James and I think a friend of his own. So probably someone in their circle, but who knows if it's Stephen. 

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1 minute ago, EmiSue said:

Mystery Dude looks like he's wearing a J&J Services shirt, which James and I think a friend of his own. So probably someone in their circle, but who knows if it's Stephen. 

Probably not Stephen then, but good eyes! 

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My country is pretty dang religiously conservative no matter what religion you are and if you're a woman and not married by the age of 30 you'll be considered an old maid. Less men to pick because the dating pool really is getting smaller because most men got married in their 20s too, unless you don't mind dating a divorcee or a widower or a foreigner. Divorce still have a bad stigma so a lot of unmarried women here don't want to marry a divorcee.

Once I hit 30 and still single, I see that the unmarried straight women my age are separated into 2 camps: the ones desperately want to get married and will say yes to any guy offering marriage, or the ones not actively looking for relationship because thinking at this age getting married today, next year, or in 10 years won't make a difference family planning wise, and starting to plan their retirement instead (saving for good retirement home, funeral arrangement and the likes).

I was in the latter category until I met my fiance. A lot of people around us keep asking if I was the one pushing him for marriage considering I'll be 33 this year, older than him, and it's only been a year since we started dating.

I wonder if Jana perhaps has similar thoughts that I have? At this age, boarding the baby train like her siblings is harder, so unless she really really wants one, getting married later won't make a difference. And perhaps, she gets even more selective like I was. The main goal shifted from just having a family of her own to having a partner that she could tolerate for the rest of her life. Maybe she is still courting Stephen, but taking her own sweet time because she has no interest in the baby train.

But of course, I'm just projecting my own experience to her so IDK 😂😂😂

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I don't presume to know whether in Jana's ideal world she'd already be aboard the baby train or not, but I do think if she found the 'one God intends for her' she still definitely has time to get aboard. At her age even presuming average fertility and at least 9 months between pregnancies she still has time to have at least 5 kids, but given her family history if she really goes for it she could actually still probably have 7 before her fertility runs out. She may be old in fundie years but she's not even 32 and her mom (who also had multiple sets of twins) was still pushing out kids at 43. She is for sure going to have an issue finding someone acceptable to her to marry but if she found them I wouldn't count her out of the baby race.

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I think if Jana and Stephen are still a thing, we won’t get an engagement announcement or a courtship announcement, just a wedding (like Jed!). So I don’t necessarily think they’re over.

1 hour ago, breakfree said:

I don't presume to know whether in Jana's ideal world she'd already be aboard the baby train or not, but I do think if she found the 'one God intends for her' she still definitely has time to get aboard. At her age even presuming average fertility and at least 9 months between pregnancies she still has time to have at least 5 kids, but given her family history if she really goes for it she could actually still probably have 7 before her fertility runs out. She may be old in fundie years but she's not even 32 and her mom (who also had multiple sets of twins) was still pushing out kids at 43. She is for sure going to have an issue finding someone acceptable to her to marry but if she found them I wouldn't count her out of the baby race.

Even more reason to enjoy courting/being engaged for longer. She could follow all the fundie “rules” and not prevent pregnancies, get the children she may want but in a small, manageable quiver. 

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6 hours ago, Smee said:

I think if Jana and Stephen are still a thing, we won’t get an engagement announcement or a courtship announcement, just a wedding (like Jed!). So I don’t necessarily think they’re over.

7 hours ago, breakfree said:

Yeah. We all know how Jana loves fall, so photos of orange/brown/gold flowers and bridesmaid dresses may drop any week now. Wouldn’t it be a great big fuck-you for them to get married during Josh’s trial? 

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