Bro Gary Hawkins 19: God Even Uses the Perforated People

[Xan]

17 hours ago, Joyster said:

Becky has not been traveling with Gary the last three weeks.  She is in North Carolina.  I believe, from the pieces of Gary's babbles, that she has thyroid cancer. 

Gary is such a miserable human being.  If he had a heart, he'd be with Becky now and not God-bothering people out west.  It's not as if he makes that much money at it and he's certainly not a good speaker.  I think it's just that he's bad at taking care of people.  He'd rather people take care of him.  If he was around Becky, someone might expect him to do something instead of making Becky and Jacob do all the work.

Gary did put this photo up on his Facebook page and Becky has posted it as well.

Spoiler

On Becky's page, one of her daughters commented on how pretty she looks.  I went to the daughter's Facebook page and it's full of freedom of choice posts and pro-abortion posts.  I wonder how Becky reconciles this?

 

[MayMay1123]

1 hour ago, Xan said:

Gary is such a miserable human being.  If he had a heart, he'd be with Becky now and not God-bothering people out west.  It's not as if he makes that much money at it and he's certainly not a good speaker.  I think it's just that he's bad at taking care of people.  He'd rather people take care of him.  If he was around Becky, someone might expect him to do something instead of making Becky and Jacob do all the work.

  Hide contents

 

 

Well, he did say that Becky told him to go. She knows that he'd be no help and that he'd expect her to do shit for him. She's better off without him and she knows it.

[Joyster]

I'm intrigued by the whole Becky (or Becko! as one of the comments on her picture referred to her) being in a different state  than Gary situation. I find that I can stand Gary more when I'm not paying attention to his Jesus message and instead looking for clues as to what went down.  I listened to the May 8, 2022 sermon, but I did fast forward a decent amount on the redundant parts.  Here are the main things I learned. Gary rented a car for Becky to drive herself and Jacob back to North Carolina.  He is planning on driving 24 straight to get back home on June 4th.

Summary of  May 8, 2022:

Gary is at a missions conference.Gary thought the church members checked out his videos before the service so they should know what his preaching is like.  Um, Gary, just have you seen the view counts?  However, he is right about one thing (CC added the baby at the end):

Spoiler

Gary complains about gas prices.  He paid over $5 a gallon in Ne-va-d-aaaay.  He tells us that's how hillbillies say it.  He had to rent a car (I don't think this was in Nevada,  but it was hard to follow) so his wife could drive back to North Carolina to see what was wrong with her.  He talks about how he wishes his wife was here, but this is his trial for 30 more days or whatever it is until they are back together.  They talked about it and prayed about it, but he has to keep going on.  People are going to hell.  He can’t go and sit in North Carolina and do nothing when the world’s going to hell, amen?  He brags that two churches offered him pastorships last year, but God didn’t want him there.  He’s already booking for 2023.  However, he hopes God comes before 2023.

Gary talks about Godbothering people  Sometimes it is hard to talk to people because it is busy and that’s why he likes to hand out gospel tracks and tell people to read it.  CC heard:

Spoiler

Gary had a preacher tell him tracts just don’t work. He gets worked up about this. Well, of course they don't f you don’t pray about it and do something.  You have to have legs on your prayers.  Once you leave tracks everywhere, you have to pray:

Spoiler

Don’t give him a pat on the back, but he supported five missionaries at one time, and he lives off of love offerings. He talks about how 2020 and 2021 were his best years financially, and 2022 is looking pretty good and we’re in a recession and gas is high.  If God does not come back between now and June 4th after he drives home for 24 hours, he’s going to travel to six new states this year.  He’s got preachers in Oregon and Washington waiting for him next year.

Edited May 23, 2022 by Joyster

[Ozlsn]

8 hours ago, Joyster said:

He talks about how 2020 and 2021 were his best years financially,

People really were bored weren't they?

[Xan]

9 hours ago, Joyster said:

He paid over $5 a gallon in Ne-va-d-aaaay.  He tells us that's how hillbillies say it. 

I was born in the mountains of North Carolina and that makes me about as hillbilly as you get.  I never heard anyone say Nevaday.  We pronounced it Nevada like everyone else.  Gary's just ignorant.

I wonder why Becky rented a car instead of just flying home?  Surely, cheap one-way tickets wouldn't be that much more than long-term car rental.  And I'm sure those little churches would have been okay with postponing Gary for a bit if they heard that his wife might have a cancer diagnosis.  Then again, this is the same guy who didn't stay close to home when his own mother was hospitalized.  

[postscript]

I expect the 24-hour drive-a-thon is for Caleb’s wedding. Based on Caleb’s countdown posts, I think it is that weekend. Hopefully Gary isn’t slated to preach or officiate. Just imagine Gary blathering on at a wedding. Then imagine Gary blathering on with no sleep. 

Gary, you did not fully “support” 5 missionaries, any more than any one church fully supports you. I’ll believe you gave them some money, but whatever you gave them wasn’t remotely enough for them to live on. You could have given each of them five dollars and called it “support.” 

[Joyster]

11 hours ago, Xan said:

I wonder why Becky rented a car instead of just flying home?  Surely, cheap one-way tickets wouldn't be that much more than long-term car rental.  And I'm sure those little churches would have been okay with postponing Gary for a bit if they heard that his wife might have a cancer diagnosis.  Then again, this is the same guy who didn't stay close to home when his own mother was hospitalized.  

Gary and Becky don't make sense ever, so I'm not really surprised they rented a car for her to drive 1700 miles (this is what she posted on Facebook on April 28) to go home.  I haven't looked for flights lately, but I heard they're expensive. It's still crazy to me, but their whole lifestyle is crazy.  When she originally posted that she was home, I thought he drove her home.  I guess they would have paid for two airline tickets (Becky and Jacob), but it still seems insane with the cost of a one-way rental and gas.  Has Becky ever flown before?  I haven't followed them long enough to really know.  Maybe she has a fear of flying.

I don't think they knew about Becky's diagnosis before she went to North Carolina.  I listened to bits and pieces of some of Gary's sermons in the last three weeks, and in earlier sermons,  they knew something was wrong when Becky went home but not to what extent.  In one earlier sermon, Gary was bashing doctors and saying they didn't really know anything.   At first, according to Gary, they had her on antibiotics and were running tests.  Becky had felt a thyroid nodule, but a test that she received in North Carolina showed two nodules.   

Edited May 23, 2022 by Joyster
Finished a thought.

[Joyster]

On the morning of Sunday, May 22 at a Bible Believing Baptist Church somewhere in Nebraska, Bro Gary spoke the same old nonsense:

The preacher of this church rambles more than Gary.  He goes on forever about a grand opening at a doughnut shop that’s opening next Saturday; he’s very excited about it and wants to meet people there. This church seems to have a much older population than typical.  The preacher, soloist, and pianist, and offering usher (a woman) all wear masks..  The preacher tells us that Gary’s wife couldn’t be with them because of her thyroid surgery, and tells Gary that he  did a good job leading the singing.

Gary starts off explaining that his wife is seeing doctors so she can get things settled and get back on the road.  Gary explains about the forsaken America and the need for him to be a missionary in America with his gospel tent.  He wants to be a help and a blessing.  He came into town and they said the commode was tore up and he got that fixed.  Commodes, toilets, whatever you call it.  He’s from back east and all he talks is hillbilly words.  He thinks Jesus might have been a hillbilly.  This is the first time he has preached in Nebraska,  He went through Nebraska about 10 years ago and had some bad Chinese food; his wife, he doesn’t know if she’s listening since she’s probably traveling back to North Carolina, she didn’t want to come back to Nebraska because the Chinese weren’t no good.

Mark, chapter 9 is what he starts with.  He’s preaching about hell, which he explains is not popular to preach on.  Jesus spoke more about hell than heaven.  People who are saved need to tell others about heaven.  He goes on about all the Bible believing saved should be going around with a pocket full of tracts.  The preacher here gives gospel tracks everywhere he goes, and Gary loves that.  It looks like the new doughnut  shop patrons will be getting some tracks on Saturday.

Who goes to Hell?  Gary’s got some things written down to tell us.  He used to smoke cigarettes a long time ago; he hates smoke, so he doesn’t know how he smoked.  In hell, you’ll breathe in smoke all the time.  Hell is the place where the devil is going to be.  Even the devil will be judged by God.  Gary doesn’t want to be in hell with the devil.  He’s wicked.  At one time, the devil was in heaven and wanted to be the song leader.  He started playing the wrong kind of music and Jesus kicked him out.  Amen!  (Seriously?  Contemporary music is how the devil got kicked out of heaven? ).  There’s going to be murderers in hell.  People that murdered people that never got saved will go to hell.  David was a murderer, but he got saved so he’s in heaven. Do you want to hang out with murderers?  What about child molesters?  If they get saved, God will forgive them and we have to forgive them too.  Amen?  Do you want to go to hell with child molesters?  Good people are going to hell because they rejected Jesus Christ.  If you reject Jesus, God’s not sending you to hell; you’re sending yourself to hell. I have a lot I could say on this, but I just can’t go there now.  

John, Chapter 19, verse 30.  Mathew, chapter 7.  He’ll get through this, and then we’ll do what Baptists do best--eat.  He talks about fake prayer.  If you pray but you don’t believe, you’re lying.  Gary’s a little disappointed that the people they Godbothered yesterday didn’t show up in church today.  One said maybe and the other said they were coming.  That’s their (the two people who didn’t show up) problem but the pastor is going to keep calling them.  I fast-forwarded a bit.  Now Gary’s talking about how America’s turning to communism because we want everything the government has got except for God.  He does his video because some people don’t have church and they need something, but do you know what has become church today?  He looks at the camera and waves a dismissive hand.  Video.  He doesn’t want to stand before God and say he watched Facebook church.  If you’re sick, stay at home.  But a lot of people in Nebraska are well enough to go to church and they don’t because of Facebook.  They’ll be well enough to go to work tomorrow morning and Walmarts tomorrow afternoon.  We have time for everything but God.

Luke, chapter 18, verse 11.  He’s got to finish soon so they can have breakfast, lunch, supper, or whatever you call it here.  Gary thinks you should tithe, fast, and do good things, but that won’t get you into heaven.  A sinner just has to be saved.  When you get to judgment, it won’t have a thing to do with religion. He’s not even sure Baptists will be mentioned on judgment day.  The only thing that will be mentioned will be what you did for God.  Why does Gary go on and on about Baptists and the KJV then?  He contradicts his own words and makes absolutely no sense! Catholics, Methodists, no denominations will be mentioned.  Baptists is the closest religion to the Bible, but he’s not going to heaven because of his religion; he’s going because of his relationship.  He has seven children.  When they started out, he didn’t have a babysitter for  his children.  He took his children on visitation.  They would get excited when someone said they were going to church.  He had to sit them down and tell them people will lie to do anything else but church.  We’re living in a lying society.  

Now he’s reading Revelations.  The next topic is GPS; it can lead you the wrong way.  A preacher friend of Gary’s was once led to a cow pasture by GPS.  There are a lot of people looking for the cow pasture and not looking for the end of life.  If we don’t go through Jesus, we don’t go to heaven. When he’s dying, he’s not going through a church building or a post office.  He’s going through Jesus.  A man told him yesterday that he was not saved, but he’ll do it tomorrow.  He’s probably still in bed.  We need to get a picture of someone burning in hell and pray about that person getting saved.

[Dana723]

12 minutes ago, Joyster said:

He started playing the wrong kind of music and Jesus kicked him out.  Amen!  (Seriously?  Contemporary music is how the devil got kicked out of heaven? ). 

Well that's a new one...

[postscript]

Hell is not popular to preach on? Does Gary listen to any of his contemporaries (or himself for that matter)? They spend a lot of time preaching about Hell. 

Child molesters who get saved will go to heaven? Does that mean Josh Duggar is going to heaven? I can’t help wondering how much Gary knows about the Duggars. He seems out of touch with current events that don’t directly relate to his beloved Trump or current gas prices. 

And yet he judges an entire state because it once served him bad Chinese. Gary’s opinions never cease to fascinate me. 

[Black Aliss]

On 5/22/2022 at 7:51 PM, Joyster said:

He’s got preachers in Oregon and Washington waiting for him next year.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[CTRLZero]

1 hour ago, Black Aliss said:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I feel your pain.  🙃

[mango_fandango]

Ok folks

I was reading an old Bro Gary thread, and realised that it has been 4 years and 4 days since I posted THIS!

[Joyster]

 

On 5/23/2022 at 10:17 PM, postscript said:

And yet he judges an entire state because it once served him bad Chinese. Gary’s opinions never cease to fascinate me. 

I think he was just trying to get someone to treat him to a Chinese meal.  Afterwards, he said something about just because you had one bad steak that doesn't mean all steaks are bad.  I agree his opinions are fascinating; it's odd what he remembers about places.

Gary preached on Wednesday, May 25 at Liberty Baptist in Fremont, Nebraska.  

There aren’t any close captions on this one or Sunday night’s service on Gary's you-tube.  However, the church’s recording has closed captioning

Brother Tim introduced Gary.  The preacher spent the afternoon talking with Gary, and with what the preacher could “understand with the accent, just kidding,”  he seems to have a real heart for the Lord.

Gary says it’s good to be in New Mexico, and everyone laughs.  Gary laughs and says he has no idea where he is, but he knows he’s in a state of confusion.  He then says it’s good to be in New Nebraska, but it’s good to be from North Carolina.  He doesn’t mind people making fun of him; he’ll help them out and do it as well.

Gary asked the congregation to pray for his wife.  He doesn’t do well without her; she told him he was doing alright.  She’s going Friday for her “thur-oid” problem, and a specialist is going to look at her.  Hopefully she’ll convince him to take it out.  He asks the congregation to pray for them next week and,  "if you ain’t doing nothing, it’s only four hours to Vinton (or Benton), Iowa.  He’s looking forward to a tent revival."

Gary wants people to ask him for a prayer card at the end of the service so they can put it where all Baptists put it-- the refrigerator.  He hopes the Lord will come before the 2022 and the next election, but if he don’t, we need to continue on.  He likes tent preaching because if it’s raining you have shelter, and you can reach the lost with them.  It doesn’t seem like there’s been too many “lost” people going to tent services, but okay Gary.  He thinks a good tent revival can get people to come who don’t go to church.  And then he went on his spiel about if they aren’t going to the tent, make your speakers a little louder.  How many people have you saved that way, Gary? He wants the congregation to know he can come back with his tent service next year.  This is his second year in Iowa, and he’ll be back if he doesn’t make people mad.  The truth makes people mad. I fast forwarded a bit.

These are exciting times!  They are taking our freedoms away, but we can still serve God.  People are discouraged, but we shouldn’t be because of JESUS.  There was a preacher ln New York who died during this Covid thing, and the church had their eyes on the wrong thing--the pastor.  Now the church is going to close its doors.  Gary believes this church has a pretty good man, but he doesn’t know what his wife thinks about him.  CC has Gary saying:

Spoiler

He lets them know that if he says amen, they better say it back or the Methodists might beat them to the restaurant tonight.  Gary yells at the congregation a bit about being saved, and then lets them know that they’re probably not used to his type of preaching, but he’s going to give them some good preaching.

Gary doesn’t know how many of them have traveled for three weeks and left their wife behind, but Gary doesn’t like it.  He and God aren’t on good talking terms because he took his wife to North Carolina.  He knows, "A lot of y'all from Nebraska have your little halos on and you don’t have any humor; go ahead and take your halos off; you aren’t as good as you think you are, amen."  He then stomps to the other side.  He then talks about his comforter who never left him or disappointed him.  I fast forwarded a bit.

When his wife went to North Carolina, she stopped at a friend’s house whose husband died last year of Covid.  The government found out and paid her $9,000.  Gary told her, "Whereever I die, if in Nebraska or whatever, you call the government and tell them I died of the Covid, amen?"  I guess lying is okay now if it's to the government.

Gary’s been through a lot himself.  He’s been through hurricanes and tornadoes, but he has a peacemaker.  He takes a sip of water from a cup and announces that he hopes it didn’t come from the toilet.  He talks about the war in Ukraine and when he first heard about it.  He was a McDonalds getting a bite, and the girls asked him if he kept up with the news.  She wanted to know if he thought there was going to be a World War III.  He told her sure; he let the congregation know he was trying to scare her into salvation.  He told her she should be more worried about where she’s spending eternity than World War III.  Gary thinks we should get excited for Jesus.  He knows he has a big mouth.  He said if you get a little loud, you don’t have to worry about getting sinners' attention.  Gary knows he’s crazy, but he just screwed on the right bolt tonight.  CC has Gary having some extra fun on boat:

Spoiler

You can’t quit knocking on doors because that’s what Jesus taught his disciples to do.  You aren’t better than his disciples.  He went door knocking with Brother Jordan at a trailer park.  Some guy in a home was having marital problems because his wife was in Louisiana, but he said he would go to church.  Gary lets us know that when you clean your bathrooms, you don’t expect anyone to let you know you done a good job.  But who you doing it for?  He didn’t start out preaching; he started out cleaning commodes.  Who do you do it for?  You do it for Jesus.  His wife went to see family once and Gary vacuumed.  He didn’t expect a pat on the back because Jesus saw what he is doing.  His wife sells Tupperware, and her people earn gifts.  But Jesus is a whole lot better than Tupperware.  Gary will go wherever people will have him.  He’ll go preach Jesus to the Catholic or the Mormans.  He’s not scared to go in a Morman building.  Gary doesn’t affiliate with a religion; he affiliates with Jesus.  He’s Jesus’ best friend.  CC thinks he says:

Spoiler

Our country’s in a mess. Our churches are in a mess.  Our schools are in a mess.  Years ago they took the prayer out of schools.  A few years ago they took the commandments out of the White House.

I stopped at the 54 mark.  I might continue the summary this weekend.

Edited May 27, 2022 by Joyster

[postscript]

20 minutes ago, Joyster said:

He likes tent preaching because if it’s raining you have shelter

The kind of shelter you don't get in a church? You know, a building with four walls and a roof?

22 minutes ago, Joyster said:

He likes tent preaching because if it’s raining you have shelter

Thank you, closed captioning.  You gave me a much needed laugh. You also took my mind to some very, ahem, inappropriate places.  

[Xan]

10 hours ago, Joyster said:

He takes a sip of water from a cup and announces that he hopes it didn’t come from the toilet. 

Gary is such a pissy little man.  I'm sure he told them he needed water while he was preaching and expected them to get him bottled water.  Gary's too good for water in a cup, don't you know!

I particularly like closed captions saying that Gary is Jesus' butt.  Even closed captions is tired of him.

I don't think he does as well without Becky mothering him on the road.  She seems to be a calming influence.  I know that he gets peeved if people don't "Amen" him back but that bit about "...have your little halos on and you don’t have any humor; go ahead and take your halos off; you aren’t as good as you think you are, amen" is just nasty.

[postscript]

Gary seems to think he’s being funny, when he’s really just crass, mean-spirited and bigoted. Summaries make him sound like the world’s most offensive stand-up comic, interspersed with Jesus. I think Becky may influence him to tone it down. He seems to be yielding to his worst impulses when she’s not with him.

I doubt Jesus would describe Gary as his best friend. He might agree with closed captioning about Gary being his butt, though. Closed captioning seems considerably smarter than Gary and makes about the same amount of sense, 

[MayMay1123]

I know we've said it before, but, why the hell are Gary's ties soooo damn long? The end right around his crotch! Does he think it helps hide his belly? I don't get it...

[Xan]

16 minutes ago, MayMay1123 said:

I know we've said it before, but, why the hell are Gary's ties soooo damn long? The end right around his crotch! Does he think it helps hide his belly? I don't get it...

It's because his hero, Donald Trump, wears a long tie.  Trump once told Chris Christie to wear longer ties because they were "slenderizing".  As if...

[Joyster]

@Xan you are so right about the water!  I forgot to mention that at the previous church, Gary asked if the water bottle I saw him put on the pulpit  was really his.  He hoped aloud that nobody was trying to poison him since he was drinking from an open bottle.  I think he does really miss Becky, but it's more because he's realizing all the things she does for him.  I loved how he mentioned he vacuumed ONCE and didn't expect a pat on the back; yet, years later, he's mentioning it in front of a congregation.  My husband vacuums all the time, and he doesn't expect recognition from Jesus or anybody else.  He just enjoys a clean floor.

Another weird thing is that Gary called the pastor Brother Tim a couple of times.  However, the pastor's name is John.  I thought that maybe the pastor was nicknamed Jim, but I can't find any evidence of that on Facebook.  The pastor sat behind Gary during the sermon and was expressionless most of the sermon.  You could tell the pastor was listening.  Gary at one point in the middle said something about being nervous that he didn't hear the pastor saying amen.  To give Brother JOHN credit, he didn't start saying amen after that.  The only expression he gave was a slight laugh during Gary's transgender rant about Gary being in a woman's body 9 months and how he couldn't want to come out.

Gary on Wednesday, May 25 at Liberty Baptist in Fremont, Nebraska continued from Gary's disgust at prayer and God being taken out of public buildings.

Gary talks about some old time preachers.  Each time, he goes through a list and each time said he was the bravest man. However, those preachers are probably rolling in their graves because CC thinks Gary is saying:

Spoiler

Gary believes God’s cut off our weather pattern.  Have you noticed we have had some crazy weather?  He was in Montana on Mother’s Day and it snowed!  We have droughts across our land and fire where it’s never burned.  Why is that? I know; I know!  Global warming!  Climate change!  Human stupidity!  No, of course not:  Nobody’s getting God’s attention.  All the problems in America are because people quit praying.  He starts going on about people who are transgender.  He’s a man and he’s proud of it.  He hopes he never sees one of those “things” that want to be a woman because he will tell them, “God made you a man, the Democrats made you what you are.”  He goes through his spiel about prayer not being good enough if you’re not really saved.

Jesus gave us a gift. When Gary married his wife, she let him know that her birthday is September 11, and he better have a gift for her when he gets home.  He’s done pretty good so far, but pray how he works out again this year because the Lord Christ is coming.  CC thinks he said Lord Terrence (maybe he can join Lord Daniel of the laundromat on the Jill thread):

Spoiler

Gary tells the congregation that he has seven children.  He knows he doesn’t look bad enough to have seven children.  He never tells his children they are saved.  Why?  Because he’s not God.  Gary was out knocking with Brother Jordan and they met a Methodist who was married to a Catholic.  With disgust in his voice, Gary asks how he could marry her.  This woman got diagnosed with cancer and died seven days later.  The man believed she was saved.  Now, Gary can’t tell if she was saved, but if she believed that doctrine, she’s burning in hell.  Here’s the screenshot of pissy Gary delivering that message:

Spoiler

Gary sang in the choir, he knocked on the doors, and he was losing his soul or CC thinks a world game of duck duck goose:

Spoiler

Being truly saved is like a woman expecting.  After a while, you don’t have to tell people.  If only that were true, Gary.

 

 

Edited May 28, 2022 by Joyster
Removed random picture of Gary.

[Joyster]

Gary will be at the tent meeting on  May 29-June 1 at the Old Train Depot in Vinton, Iowa sponsored by Cornerstone Baptist Church.  His son, Caleb, will be getting married on Saturday, June 4.  Depending where he gets married (Virginia or North Carolina), Gary will have to drive between 14 and 19 hours. 

[postscript]

Fun for all? Free inflatables on Sunday? I can see Gary giving those a disapproving eye. He doesn't seem to believe in church being fun. 

The free meal, on the other hand, he'll happily take advantage of. 

 

[Joyster]

Cornerstone Baptist has had a lot of gimmicks to bring people in including a kid's candy grab on Easter Sunday, the song leader getting pied in the face, and a tower of soda pop AND a treasure chest for the person who brings in the most visitors in May.  From Cornerstone's Facebook:

Quote

Getting ready for the kick off of Spring Program 2022!! The person with most visitors in the month of May wins the tower of soda pop and the treasure chest! Join us Sunday to see it in person!

It's going to be fun to see Gary try to process this.  Gary hasn't had his tent up in awhile, so maybe that will make him overlook all the church's "fun" ways.

Edited May 28, 2022 by Joyster

[Ozlsn]

3 hours ago, Joyster said:

Now, Gary can’t tell if she was saved, but if she believed that doctrine, she’s burning in hell. 

But he can't tell his kids they're saved because he's not God. Whatever Gary, you pathetic little man.

[Xan]

There's an Albert Brooks movies called "Defending Your Life" about a man dying and going into the afterlife only to find that he gets judged on what he did while alive.  In this scenario, people who come up short have to go back to earth time after time until they get it right.  Sometimes when I hear Bro Gary talking about Heaven, I imagine him actually ending up with someone explaining to him later how he got it all wrong.  

I have no idea what waits for us on the other side -- if anything.  But I do enjoy thinking about Gary and Jill Rodrigues and the rest of our fundies finding out that their crazy rules were useless.