Webster4Eva 10: If Alyssa Doesn't Record It, Then Does It Really Exist?

[JuanitaBanana]

41 minutes ago, Maggie Mae said:

I grew up with white dining room chairs and white carpet. If we ate something messy/stainable, I usually had to sit on a towel, and was reminded to use napkins. But the only person who ever stained anything was my horrible aunt who was four years older than my mother. Not any of the dozen or so kids who were over. Nope, the 50 some year old person who should know how to eat like an adult is the one who (probably on purpose) dumped cranberry sauce all over the floor and stepped in it.  And then somehow managed to get a black mark on the chair from what I suspected was a half smoked cigarette. And I think red wine was also spilled. 

There was also an incident with a blue pen but at that point no one cared anymore. 

My biggest problem with Alyssa's dining room is the rug. I just don't understand why anyone wants a rug in an eating area. I have turned down multiple houses (and argued with a real estate agent) due to carpet in the "dinning" area. The rug seems even worse, because not only is it going to get gross very quickly, it's going to lead to chairs and the bench being half on/half off. 

I like the look of rugs in the dining room but Alyssa's rug is too small. The chairs need to sit on the rug even when you pull them out. 

I wouldn't have a glass top table or white chairs with little kids. Even if they have good table manners, sometimes their little hands just spill things specially if they use cups and utensils made for adult hands. 

[Jackie3]

2 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

And that is why I seperate the good books. The ones I can’t replace. I keep them in my sons room because they are better with books and at bedtime I just go and get the one I read. But I am the same with myself,  I have books I will read in the bathtub and books I keep carefully on a shelf. 

That sounds like a great plan! I didn't know there were books that can't be replaced. Maybe ones signed by the author?. . Or first editions. . . We don't collect or care about books like that.  Just plain ol' reading books.

Yes, if Alyssa has a first edition of Brown Bear, Brown Bear or Chicka Chicka Boom Boom she should definitely put it on a high shelf away from little hands. I suppose that could be what is on that shelf.

Edited September 23, 2021 by Jackie3

[CanadianMamam]

37 minutes ago, Jackie3 said:

That sounds like a great plan! I didn't know there were books that can't be replaced. Maybe ones signed by the author?. . Or first editions. . . We don't collect or care about books like that.  Just plain ol' reading books.

Yes, if Alyssa has a first edition of Brown Bear, Brown Bear or Chicka Chicka Boom Boom she should definitely put it on a high shelf away from little hands. I suppose that could be what is on that shelf.

I have a first edition of The Cat in the Hat that belonged to my father, but it’s not the potential value that makes it special, it is the fact that it was my father’s and then mine and now belongs to my children. I have some paperback copies of my dad’s favorite books that are valuable because they were his (he died when I was barely out of my teens), I have the poetry books my mother gifted me for high school graduation, my grandmother’s cookbooks. It’s not the monetary value of the books that makes them special, but the sentimental value.

That probably isn’t the case for Alyssa, she probably just has them for the aesthetic. But given her children do have little siblings (and will likely have more), an out of reach book shelf isn’t the worst idea. 

[AussieKrissy]

2 hours ago, JuanitaBanana said:

I like the look of rugs in the dining room but Alyssa's rug is too small. The chairs need to sit on the rug even when you pull them out. 

I wouldn't have a glass top table or white chairs with little kids. Even if they have good table manners, sometimes their little hands just spill things specially if they use cups and utensils made for adult hands. 

I wouldn't have white chairs and a glass table top with me, I am a catastrophe at not dropping things and or spilling....

[SassyPants]

17 minutes ago, AussieKrissy said:

I wouldn't have white chairs and a glass table top with me, I am a catastrophe at not dropping things and or spilling....

Ditto. No way in hell I’d ever have a white dining room chair or carpet. I’m guessing the girls rarely actually eat in that room. 
 

Its 100% unrealistic to think that 6,  4, 3 and <1 YOs are going to eat and never spill. It’s not even developmentally appropriate for the youngest girls to  be neat and tidy at all times while they are EATING and DRINKING. 

[nelliebelle1197]

6 hours ago, Maggie Mae said:

I assume everything on Instagram is curated. It's supposed to be. It's a visual medium, it's not a place to write about your life, it's a place to show pictures. Most people don't want to look at dirty houses, dirty kids, and dark, poorly lit photos. So people use filters to brighten everything up, or change the colors to match their personal preferred aesthetic.  Personally, I still don't understand why my parents both took some of the photos they did, much less saved them in albums, pre-digital photos. 

I liked the room. I liked the muted rainbow. I wonder what it looks like in person, and how much clutter is just shoved in the closest or kicked behind the photographer. Because you know there is something. 

I put my "custom title" in the location field, just because I was so sad when they went away. Unfortunately, it's so old that I'm sure most people just assume I can't spell. I don't even remember the person who called me that or what thread it was in or even really why. 

I just cannot give up Hamster Cage of Horrors, freeing Karen. Because I coined HCH and Karen is free!

[Jackie3]

3 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I’m guessing the girls rarely actually eat in that room. 
 

There are insta stories with the kids eating in the dinning room. I think they have dinner there every night, but breakfast and lunch in the kitchen.

5 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

I have a first edition of The Cat in the Hat that belonged to my father, but it’s not the potential value that makes it special, it is the fact that it was my father’s and then mine and now belongs to my children. I have some paperback copies of my dad’s favorite books that are valuable because they were his (he died when I was barely out of my teens), I have the poetry books my mother gifted me for high school graduation, my grandmother’s cookbooks. It’s not the monetary value of the books that makes them special, but the sentimental value.

. . . 

But given her children do have little siblings (and will likely have more), an out of reach book shelf isn’t the worst idea. 

Cat in the Hat first edition! Cool. I can certainly see keeping that away from kids, and buying them their own copy. I wouldn't even leave a book like that in a child's room at all.

Sounds like all the other books are for adults, so not an issue. I've got things like that, too.

I can certainly understand Allie and Lexi needing private places, safe from the littles, where they can keep their special or breakable things. We did that with my oldest, gave her her own special space, that the little one couldn't access. But that shelf is too high for even Allie (who is tall for a six-year old). I don't think it functions to protect Allie's stuff, it is way too high.

Edited September 24, 2021 by Jackie3

[JuanitaBanana]

Alyssa obsession with her phone is ridiculous. She just posted a story and Maci is pulling her hair and hitting her on the face and all I can think is "put your damn phone down and pay attention to your baby!" It also annoys me when she's cooking with just one hand because she's recording an Instagram story. 

 

ETA: She deleted the story where Maci was hitting her. I guess she realized how bad it looked. 

Edited September 24, 2021 by JuanitaBanana

[Karma]

1 hour ago, JuanitaBanana said:

She deleted the story where Maci was hitting her. I guess she realized how bad it looked. 

I can still see it. She sounded so pissed off that they’re in the hotel room and she wanted to go out and get pizza. Fun she says sarcastically.  She goes out by herself. Honestly she sometimes seems so dissatisfied by this life. Then yes, Maci wants attention but she has to film 🙄

[JuanitaBanana]

6 hours ago, Karma said:

I can still see it. She sounded so pissed off that they’re in the hotel room and she wanted to go out and get pizza. Fun she says sarcastically.  She goes out by herself. Honestly she sometimes seems so dissatisfied by this life. Then yes, Maci wants attention but she has to film 🙄

There was another story before this. Maci was slapping her and pulling her hair and Alyssa had both hands on her phone. At the end of the story John came and took Maci away. 

She complains that her day was long... Girl, you're on vacations and just went out for pizza by yourself! Your kids were watching cartoons and eating popcorn in a hotel room! I wish all my "long days" were like that. 

[Jackie3]

4 hours ago, JuanitaBanana said:

She complains that her day was long... Girl, you're on vacations and just went out for pizza by yourself! Your kids were watching cartoons and eating popcorn in a hotel room! I wish all my "long days" were like that. 

Most of the other 20-somethings in this wedding are going out drinking or partying. Or they're having a long dinner, talking and reminiscing. She and John can't go out and join them. She's young and pretty and has a suitcase full of lovely clothes that she carefully picked out, but she can't go out and enjoy herself. It's not the worst thing in the world, but it clearly frustrates her.

Even the bridal lunch can't be too much fun, with four little kids to watch. I remember eating with small children, I never really found it fun.

Edited September 24, 2021 by Jackie3

[JuanitaBanana]

3 minutes ago, Jackie3 said:

Most of the other 20-somethings in this wedding are going out drinking or partying. Or they're having a long dinner, talking and reminiscing. She and John can't go out and join them. 

Well, yes. That's what happens when you have 4 little girls to take care of. 

I feel bad for her daughters, I know what it's like to grow up with a mother that is unhappy with her life. I'm not saying she's a bad mom or that she doesn’t love her kids, but still... she seems to complain a lot lately and she sounded really bitter in her story. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Her friend who is getting married travels extensively. Her family must have plenty of money because she travels all the time. I think Alyssa probably wishes she could have that life. The wedding just throws it all in her face. What she’s missing out on.

[kmachete14]

Did Alyssa say why they brought the girls? Alyssa has gone on an adults-only cruise before, where she clearly had the time of her life drinking mocktails and dressing up. I wonder why they didn't get one of her gazillion siblings to "visit" aka babysit, and then take a mom&dad only trip to the wedding? 

[arareyeah]

Seeing her kids on the plane not properly wearing their masks is stressing me out. Yes, they're toddlers but she as their mom didn't even fix it for them. Ugh.

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, kmachete14 said:

Did Alyssa say why they brought the girls? Alyssa has gone on an adults-only cruise before, where she clearly had the time of her life drinking mocktails and dressing up. I wonder why they didn't get one of her gazillion siblings to "visit" aka babysit, and then take a mom&dad only trip to the wedding? 

Although I never traveled much without my kids, because as a working parent, if I was going to take time off to travel, it was certainly going to included the kids, but Alyssa has none of these concerns. She had lots of choices besides dragging 4 little kids to a destination wedding.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

Although I never traveled much without my kids, because as a working parent, if I was going to take time off to travel, it was certainly going to included the kids, but Alyssa has none of these concerns. She had lots of choices besides dragging 4 little kids to a destination wedding.

I’m a SAHM and I like to find an excuse to get away from my kids on occasion 😛 Maybe Alyssa wanted to show off her cute little Mini Alyssas all in matching clothing to all the other people at the wedding. 

[OHFL2009]

I'm not sure how close her kids are to the bride, but maybe one or more of them are flower girls? They're about that age. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

13 minutes ago, OHFL2009 said:

I'm not sure how close her kids are to the bride, but maybe one or more of them are flower girls? They're about that age. 

She and Bethany Chavez go back quite a few years. Bethany’s brother was with John Webster’s sister at one point. I think they are probably still together. Alyssa is the matron of honor. 

[CanadianMamam]

14 minutes ago, OHFL2009 said:

I'm not sure how close her kids are to the bride, but maybe one or more of them are flower girls? They're about that age. 

That is what I was thinking, Alyssa seems to be a bridesmaid, so maybe the older girls are flower girls? She did go away without the girls for this bride's bachelorette, well she took Maci and John watched her in the hotel.

[Jackie3]

6 hours ago, kmachete14 said:

Did Alyssa say why they brought the girls? Alyssa has gone on an adults-only cruise before, where she clearly had the time of her life drinking mocktails and dressing up. I wonder why they didn't get one of her gazillion siblings to "visit" aka babysit, and then take a mom&dad only trip to the wedding? 

Well, the young Bates men are far too manly to watch small children. Katie is busy with her wedding. Addie and Ellie are too young to watch four little kids alone for days. That just leaves Kelly, and maybe she was busy.

7 hours ago, JuanitaBanana said:

Well, yes. That's what happens when you have 4 little girls to take care of. 

I feel bad for her daughters, I know what it's like to grow up with a mother that is unhappy with her life. I'm not saying she's a bad mom or that she doesn’t love her kids, but still... she seems to complain a lot lately and she sounded really bitter in her story. 

Well, at home she can forget what she is missing. But it must be really frustrating to see other young women who are footloose and fancy free, going out when she has to stay in. Alyssa seems to love pretty clothes and parties, it must be hard to nurse Maci or soothe Zoey's tantrum while others are out doing exactly what she wants to do.

[just_ordinary]

The sad thing is: the only help she gets if she expresses her unhappiness is the advice to pray more and have another child. I wonder if she consciously thinks about this: what she wishes for - what she was raised to want or if it’s more a nebulous cloud of unhappiness. Or maybe she doesn’t allow herself to realise she was screwed over. Does she talk with John about it? How does he feel about their life. I mean, those Fundie men don’t spend all their time pregnant but they are the ones that have to provide for their growing brood and a forever SAHW. And this younger gen is sometimes involved into parenting and household, especially when the children are still young (John and Chad for sure). I am sure some are not that happy about their lot as well. They are young, if they decide that God closes her womb now, they will still be young when the children are much more self sufficient. They would have so much more money at their disposal as well. 
I am pretty sure Alyssa would love to mingle with her teenage daughters. If they just could sent them to a Christian school she would be much happier. Even Taliban Dan might accept that the severe heart conditions might make it necessary (it’s not as if her doctor would tell him she is actually fine or cured when they decide to play it up a bit).

Re: only showing the good stuff. I don’t think that’s a problem. Children/teenager learn that tv and commercials are fake and that it’s not reality. And there have always been scams specific targeting them. Anyone remember those ringtone schemes where teenagers built up quite some meaty bills and even dept? Stuff like this will always be around and young people will always have to learn critical thinking, not to believe everything and trying to not measure themselves to others. 
And if adults realise that they have a problem in that area - unfollowing is very easy. Consciously continuing and than complaining about it is a bit irritating. The content isn’t forced on you, so the creator has not to trigger warn or cater to your needs. I really think people need to be better advocates for themselves in real life instead of being key board warriors. Sorry for the rant, it’s not targeted to anyone here specially but to the general mindset that strangers owe you the truth about their life.

Edited September 25, 2021 by just_ordinary

[Bbfamteam]

On 9/23/2021 at 7:00 AM, nelliebelle1197 said:

I want my custom title back 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺😢😤

Awww  W 

[CanadianMamam]

So it looks like Allie and Lexi are flower girls because Alyssa has a story about her and the two of them going to the venue. 

[llucie]

10 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

So it looks like Allie and Lexi are flower girls because Alyssa has a story about her and the two of them going to the venue. 

But it is for a friends wedding.