Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 35

[ADoyle90815]

[GreyhoundFan]

[smittykins]

Another not-technically-political meme, but since we don’t have a “Purity Culture Memes” thread…

[Xan]

2 hours ago, smittykins said:

Another not-technically-political meme, but since we don’t have a “Purity Culture Memes” thread…

And if the future husband doesn't abstain before marriage?  To what, I wonder, do they compare him?  I know our current fundies insist that the males also abstain but we know that they don't value male purity the same way they value female purity.   I know where I like to tell the producer of those purity pins to stick them.

(I did look up Wilding Industries, Inc. but I can't find those pins anymore from their producers.) 

[fraurosena]

[smittykins]

11 hours ago, Xan said:

And if the future husband doesn't abstain before marriage?  To what, I wonder, do they compare him?  I know our current fundies insist that the males also abstain but we know that they don't value male purity the same way they value female purity.   I know where I like to tell the producer of those purity pins to stick them.

(I did look up Wilding Industries, Inc. but I can't find those pins anymore from their producers.) 

Or what if you don’t get married, or you’re LGBTQ?

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"Nicki Minaj’s Cousin’s Friend’s Swollen Testicles"

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I have a cartooning colleague who has some views on the coronavirus you should not trust. It’s not what you think. He’s pro-vaccine and maybe pro-face mask. But now he’s telling people that hand sanitizer doesn’t work against the coronavirus. He claims he caught COVID about three months before anyone else in this country caught it. And after being fully vaxxed, he slithered into a Walgreens, didn’t tell them he was already fully vaxxed, and got a booster before the CDC advised for it.

I have another cartooning colleague who is anti-face masks, anti-vaccine, anti-social distancing, claims the government is using all of it to control you and the virus was a hoax. He claims it’s no worse than the flu and the number of deaths are fabricated. He claims he tested positive for COVID antibodies and like Rand Paul, he’s now immune…forever. He calls people who wear face masks “sheeple” and cowards and mocks them for being afraid to leave their homes without a facemask, even though he’s afraid to leave his home without an assault rifle.

Do you know what both of these cartoonists, one being a liberal socialist and the other being a Nazi-supporting white supremacist, have in common other than being cartoonists? They’re not scientists or doctors. You should not believe what they say without fact-checking it. Even though anything I post has been confirmed by scientists, you should not blindly trust me. Go behind me and fact-check what I say. Why? Because I’m not a doctor or a scientists either. One of my best friends is a physicist and I can’t tell you what he does for a living even though he’s told me a thousand times. I am not a scientist and that, you do not have to fact-check.

Even though cartoonists are supposed to base their work on facts and real information (too many cartoonists are NOT doing that anymore), you still can’t totally trust a cartoonist for your science. Last week, I saw a cartoon blaming natural disasters on God’s wrath over our woke culture. It’s not global warming, it’s trans athletes in little girls’ bathrooms. Granted, that guy’s a climate-change denying fundamentalist zealot lunatic, but still…trust scientists.

Don’t trust cartoonists. Don’t trust stupid Republican senators who are self-certified eye doctors and not immunologists or virus experts. And, don’t trust pop singers.

Nicki Minaj is a very famous pop singer even though I can’t name one of her songs (except for the one with Lonely Island, “The Creep”). Minaj, who is from Trinidad (in case you’re a Republican, Trinidad is an entirely different country and not some girl named Trini’s daddy) is refusing to be vaccinated and says her cousin in Trinidad is also refusing to be vaccinated because a friend of hers got the vaccine and it made him impotent with swollen testicles. Rose McGowan, another anti-vaxxer celebrity, is backing Nicki’s claim about her cousin’s friend in Trinidad.

Did you have a friend when you were a teen, or maybe you were the friend, that claimed he had a girlfriend but she went to a different school? Maybe you or that friend claimed the never-seen girlfriend was in Canada. The cool thing about doing that to defend yourself from dreaded accusations of virginity is that nobody can prove you’re lying. Nobody can fact-check it because nobody ever goes to Canada. Hell, it may not even exist. All those photos and videos of Canada were created in the same studio they faked the moon landing in. But, you can’t put it down as certifiable fact that this person claiming he has a girlfriend elsewhere is definitely telling you the truth and not lying his virgin ass off. By the way, my high school girlfriend lives on the moon. Good luck debunking that, fuckers.

But ya’ know what I’m thinking? I’m thinking Tucker Carlson was that guy back when he was a student at a fancy-schmancy pants prep school. Tucker got kicked out of a Swiss prep school, probably for being too white, and I bet when he resumed studies at a U.S. prep school, he claimed to have left a girlfriend back in Switzerland. I’ve seen photos of Swiss women and I’ve seen photos of Tucker. Trust me: Tucker never had a Swiss girlfriend. If someone shows you a photo of their girlfriend, and it’s on a box of hot chocolate, she’s probably not real.

I’m not just basing this speculation that Tucker had an imaginary cartoon girlfriend when he was in prep school on how Tucker looks, his punchable face, or how feeble and undesirable he is. I base this on the fact Tucker took Nicki’s claim and spread it.

Tucker Carlson reported Nicki’s claims…and then shockingly, he made a correction. What he corrected was his initial reporting that it was Nicki’s cousin who has a big-ball crisis, and not her friend’s balls. I’m glad he cleared that up. Tucker wants to get in touch (hopefully, not literally) with Nicki’s cousin’s friend so he can fly down to Trinidad to get the full scoop on the swollen nuts. It will be the first time testicles were ever interviewed by a dick. Hey, Tucks….as the great Tallahassee said in Zombieland, “Nut up or shut up.”

This has gotten so crazy that Dr. Anthony Fauci and the health Minister of Trinidad have had to debunk it. And Dr. Fauci has much more important things to do, like debunking stupid shit Rand Paul says and refraining himself from leaping over a table and kicking his ass as though he was his next door neighbor. I have been fully vaccinated and I can assure you that my testicles…wait a minute…mmmhmmm….yeah…OK. I just checked and they’re still fine. No, Tucker can’t inspect them.

The worst thing about ballgate might that someone with a primetime cable news show on a supposed news outlet is pushing unverified claims as fact. Even if you do have a talk show on a news channel that specializes in opinion, you’re still supposed to be a journalist. You’re still supposed to abide by the ethics of journalism. The ethics of journalism prevents most journalists from spreading misinformation on stolen elections, horse de-wormer, or third-person claims without verification, like Nicki Minaj’s cousin’s friend’s swollen balls.

Keep in mind, Tucker is in that same right-wing crowd that cast aspersions on actual news outlet’s use of anonymous sources. Before Tucker supports and helps spread this wild claims, he should make a trip to fondle some Trinidadian balls.

Tucker is spreading this unverified story for one of two reasons: He is desperate for anything to debunk COVID vaccines or…he really wants to touch some balls.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

Ad by a company in FL. Shaking my head:

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

Mark for the win!

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[JordynDarby5]

4 hours ago, GreyhoundFan said:

Mark for the win!

Good one Mark!

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[ADoyle90815]

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"Republican Fashionistas"

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I did a cartoon last week on AOC and her Met Gala dress. It was the same concept as this one, with a different message on a dress. I didn’t even think about what other cartoonists were doing on it, but the next day, I saw at least three (thanks to Mike Peterson’s “Cartoon of the Day” always featured at the Daily Cartoonist). And I didn’t care. I’m usually bothered when I do the same concept as other cartoonists, but I felt I did it differently enough. In fact, there were comments at GoComics at how I “schooled” the conversatives on how to do it. Ha.

So yeah, I used the concept again here, but I felt it was different enough. I stand by it. Now, I actually have a third idea on this issue but it doesn’t use the dress. I don’t know if I can do it since I’ve already covered the subject. I don’t think it’s one of those that needs to be repeated over and over…even though I think the idea (you have not seen yet) is hilarious. I’m thinking about it.

Oh yeah. When my editor saw the rough, he said he knew the “Gilligan” line would make it into the official cartoon.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"Gabba Gabba Haiti"

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Thousands of Haitians have come to the United States border seeking a better life for themselves and their children. They heard it was easier to cross the border now that Joe Biden is president and the racist guy was thrown out of office after being defeated in the 2020 presidential election. They were wrong.

Yes, the new guy is much better than the previous guy, but the new guy is still using policies enacted by the old guy. The United States of America should not be implementing a policy crafted by the xenophobic Stephen Baby Goebbels Miller. Policies like that should be trashed and sent to the worst place in the world, which is probably Haiti..or Indiana. Instead, we are sending the Haitians at our border back to Haiti.

Sure, they’re from Haiti but most of them haven’t been in Haiti for over a decade. I’m from Louisiana (mostly) and I haven’t been back there in nearly two decades. And if you deported me back to Louisiana, I’d be pretty pissed.

If you’re a buttmunch, then you probably think they all left Haiti last week and they’re just now arriving at our southern border. The truth is, most of them left in 2010 after a devastating earthquake hit their nation that shares a Caribbean island with the Dominican Republic. Where did all these asylum-seeking Haitians go? They went to South America with most of them landing in Chile and Brazil.

While Haiti, Chile, and Brazil are each in Latin America by location, they’re not all Latinos (this is debated a lot). It often comes down to language and skin color. Spanish is the official language of Chile. Portuguese is the official language of Brazil. And in Haiti, they have two official languages, French and Haitian Creole. By race, Brazil is 47 percent white and 43 percent mixed. Chile is nearly 90 percent white. Haiti is 95 percent black. So guess what immigrant Haitians encountered in Chile and Brazil? Yup. Racism. That stuff is everywhere.

So, with Joe Biden in the White House, Haitians in South America thought now would be a great time to abandon the lives they’ve created over the past decade and go somewhere to escape racism. They chose the United States. Ugh. Bad call. Did I mention Baby Goebbels was writing immigration policy? Did I mention we’re still using it? Isn’t this why we got rid of the last guy? I mean, one of the major reasons why?

So, the Biden administration, which is supposed to be more humane than the last administration full of Nazis, Klansmen, and fuckers, is exporting all these Haitians back to Haiti. That is a messed-up deal.

Haiti is not a great place to be. There are earthquakes, massive crime, poverty (poorest nation in the western hemisphere), a very low literacy rate, and the prime minister was recently assassinated. I once went out with a girl who had been living in Haiti (back in the 80s) and she told me it was basically legal to murder someone by hitting them with your car, and the biggest hassle from it was filling out insurance forms for damage to your car. A car can be more valuable than a human life in Haiti.

I would not want to send my worst enemy to Haiti. Haiti is so bad, I wouldn’t want to send Stephen Miller to Haiti….wait a minute. Yes, I would. I would love to send Stephen Miller to Haiti. Did I mention 95 percent of Haiti is black? Did I mention they don’t speak a lot of English? He’ll love it there. He can even take his new bride, Frau Farbissana, and their new baby, who is in the Guinness Book of World Records for being born with a Hitler mustache and a can of spray-on hair. How do we make these deportations happen?

Joe Biden is exporting these people back to Haiti under a Trump policy. Yes, a policy written by Stephen Miller. And Haiti, expecting at least 14,000, says they can’t take all of them at once. This is a poverty-ravaged nation that’s still recovering from an earthquake from a decade ago. Haiti has no place to put these immigrants being deported by Biden. These Haitians are about become refugees in their home nation, which is how a lot of black U.S. citizens feel in the U.S. They took a huge gamble leaving jobs and homes in Chile and Brazil to come to the U.S. Now, they’re finding themselves back in Haiti. Most of these people would rather be sent back to Chile and Brazil, even with the racism factor. It’s still better than Haiti. Some of them might even be OK with Indiana (which is another place we can send the Goebbels, er…Miller family where they’d be really comfortable).

And while there are thousands of non-English speaking black people in a humanitarian crisis, most of our nation is fixated on one missing white girl. Stephen Miller’s out looking for her now.

Creative note: As you may know, I like to draw my cartoons in the morning. It’s nice to kick them out early and have the rest of the day to goof off and write my next cartoon. Fact: Goofing off helps write cartoons. Pull my finger.

Delivering the cartoons in the A.M. is also advantageous to my clients as they can place it on their pages and sites for their next day’s edition. And, it helps with big mondo national reprints so my readers can be fooled into believing I’m a big cheese. The best way for me to work with this is to have my idea before going to bed so I can be free to have nightmares about zombies and taking out the garbage in my boxer/briefs (it’s a real fear of mine because I’m often at home not wearing pants). I usually won’t go to bed until I’ve decided on an idea. Last night turned into this morning. I got the idea around 2:00 A.M. and my first thought was, “Ooh.” My second thought was, “I can’t do this. It’s really insensitive.” My third thought was, “Wait a moment…that’s what I do.”

I was afraid proofer Laura would say, “Ugh…but you’re going to do what you’re going to do.” I get that from her sometimes along with, “Put on some pants.” But instead, she said, “Yeah, baby.” OK, she didn’t say, “Yeah, baby” but she liked the cartoon. Even though Laura liked it, the cartoon has already been criticized by a few readers. I’m OK with that. It’s what I do…like not wearing pants.

 

[GreyhoundFan]