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M Is for Mama 11: 10 Kids is 10 too Many for a Narcissistic, Disinterested Person


nelliebelle1197

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Just now, danvillebelle said:

Her mother is pushing 70.  Sooner or later she's going to have to start saying no (though I doubt she will).

Braggie has likely put her in the position that she feels like she can’t say no. Because she knows that if she does, a bunch of kids will be left in the care of the oldest two. 

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10 kids make for pretty Instagram photos but, let’s see how pretty the dynamic is in another 10-15 years… Big families can create big problems. Look at the Duggar siblings and the feud.

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9 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

10 kids make for pretty Instagram photos but, let’s see how pretty the dynamic is in another 10-15 years… Big families can create big problems. Look at the Duggar siblings and the feud.

Especially when there’s a narcissistic parent. Her kids will make decisions she doesn’t like. And she will just have to deal with it. 

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34 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:
10 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

10 kids make for pretty Instagram photos but, let’s see how pretty the dynamic is in another 10-15 years… Big families can create big problems. Look at the Duggar siblings and the feud.

Especially when there’s a narcissistic parent. Her kids will make decisions she doesn’t like. And she will just have to deal with it. 

I predict that when those five little boys are all teens, and the peace-keeping/supervising older sibs and grandparents are all long gone, things are going to get pretty hairy.  

Edited by danvillebelle
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41 minutes ago, danvillebelle said:

I predict that when those five little boys are all teens, and the peace-keeping/supervising older sibs and grandparents are all long gone, things are going to get pretty hairy.  

Braggie is different than some other large fundie families. She actually seems to see higher education as something good to brag about. Therefore her boys will likely go to college. She could make them stay home and do online college. But never the less, they will be busy with school work. So she may have less ability to rely on them for help because she needs them to do well in college. Because it’s another way to brag. 

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19 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Just musing about Abbie and Shaun and their decision making… if you make the choice to have an overly large family, or any family really, you, the couple, need to take care of those kids. Shaun should have stayed home to care for all 10 kids. Decisions have consequences, and IMO, no couple who have chosen to have 10 kids in rapid succession should ever assume that any other person could, would or should care for all those kids for more than a couple of hours. It’s plain irresponsible to foist all those kids off on anyone, and Abbie and Shaun do it all the time. If they wanted to have continual, “me and couple” time, they should have made different parental choices. They want their cake and eat it too. 
 

I think AH reads here. I won’t be surprised to see a comment that they “pay” others to care for their kids. Yes, paying for childcare is different than assuming others will do it for free. Although I can’t imagine many GPs would charge such a fee.

This. We have 2 kids. We rely on grandparents for childcare, but it's rarely more than a few hours (and both sets of grandparents made clear that while they were happy to babysit for a few hours, they would not be doing every day or huge amounts of time except for special circumstances). It lets me go to work without paying a babysitter (part time, so only once or twice a week) and get to doctors' appointments and the like, MAYBE a dinner/movie out as a couple or some time with a friend when Mr. NQ otherwise wouldn't be able to be home with them once in a while, but that's about it, and that's more than generous as far as we're concerned. Frankly, with a third on the way I keep wondering if this is the point where they justifiably say that they can't keep watching them as often, because several little kids are a lot of work! I can't imagine just... assuming that family members will watch your large group of kids at any and all times for an extended period.

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The ultimate payback would be if one by one, slowly and steadily, every single one of those kids moves out of state as soon as they are able and leave Braggie and Shaun rambling around in their craptastic barn all by themselves (if it hasn't collapsed by then).

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5 minutes ago, danvillebelle said:

The ultimate payback would be if one by one, slowly and steadily, every single one of those kids moves out of state as soon as they are able and leave Braggie and Shaun rambling around in their craptastic barn all by themselves (if it hasn't collapsed by then).

I swear there’s always one kid that will stick by shitty parents. Probably out of guilt. 

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5 minutes ago, NotQuiteMotY said:

I can't imagine just... assuming that family members will watch your large group of kids at any and all times for an extended period.

I have known people who do this in churches too.  As soon as they walk in the door, they take their eyes off their kids and just assume everyone will watch them.  I knew (past tense, I cut myself off from them purposefully because of the way they live their life and "parent" their kids) a couple that did this and it drove me bonkers.  I pulled their toddler son back from running into the road more than once, while they were inside blithely eating their lunch.  I image Braggie and Shaun are probably the same way at their church.

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I'm avoiding a project right now, so I just did a deep dive on early Halberstadt days. I think Simon was the Shiloh of the early kids :(

Please enjoy a very colorful outfit choice I found from the Nola/Evy pregnancy photo shoot under the spoiler

Spoiler

316791_4582518886176_926005832_n.jpg.2f2d3255a94877f453b47531f329cad5.jpg

Anyway, I also did a very very lowkey data collection and projection about the next potential blessing. I think it's likely they will have 1-2 more pregnancies. 

Here is the info:

abbie.png.545ccb61141631adc6a69f5214f4a653.png

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3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Especially when there’s a narcissistic parent. Her kids will make decisions she doesn’t like. And she will just have to deal with it. 

The reaction from mama when the kids do something she is not in favor of will be like a bomb going off. Trust me on this. I heard a lot of "you want to do WHHHHHHHHHHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT?" every time I stated what I wanted to do. 

And people wonder why I'm a distrustful, secretive introvert.....

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44 minutes ago, theotherelise said:

I'm avoiding a project right now, so I just did a deep dive on early Halberstadt days. I think Simon was the Shiloh of the early kids :(

Please enjoy a very colorful outfit choice I found from the Nola/Evy pregnancy photo shoot under the spoiler

  Reveal hidden contents

316791_4582518886176_926005832_n.jpg.2f2d3255a94877f453b47531f329cad5.jpg

Anyway, I also did a very very lowkey data collection and projection about the next potential blessing. I think it's likely they will have 1-2 more pregnancies. 

Here is the info:

abbie.png.545ccb61141631adc6a69f5214f4a653.png

She had quite the rhythm going for Theo - Shiloh. She's probably so mad at Titus and Toby for messing that up.

Anyway seems like we should expect #11 announcement by winter or spring.

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Since we know she does things to space her pregnancies, I really think there will be a full 2 years or more between the twins and the next. I’m not expected an announcement before March 2022.

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Hold on to your breakfast, lunch, hat, folks…According to AH on WDYWTKW, she usually tries to do everything herself, and has rarely asked for help, BUT she burnt out- When did she burn out, about 9 kids ago? She is so full of shite and lacking in self awareness. She is one of the biggest users among this bizarre crowd.

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I think she’s going to be pregnant next summer. I think she is eager to brag that having another set of twins hasn’t stopped her. She “gets off” on proving people wrong and shocking people.

Edited by luv2laugh
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1 hour ago, luv2laugh said:

I think she’s going to be pregnant next summer. I think she is eager to brag that having another set of twins hasn’t stopped her. She “gets off” on proving people wrong and shocking people.

And zero pun intended, but every time she gets off, someone else suffers the consequences-

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Sample questions from today.

Did you cancel or postpone Europe?

AH: Cancelled, no trips on the horizon. :Insert crying baby sound :

VERY NEXT ? Does your family celebrate Halloween?

AH: We’ve been out of town the last 3 Halloweens and will be again this year.🤔

Do your kids help with Monday chores?

Well, this year the bigs are going to co-op On Mondays, so I’m not getting as much done. Cuz the babies….what about her Mother’s help? Again 🤔

She needs to stay in her lane and keep her stories straight.

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Something else just occurred to me. I guess if she’s not jetting to Europa for a beautiful Spring in Paris, smelling the aroma of lavender in Southern France,  or eating penne rustica in Florence, it’s not a true vacation in AH’s eyes. She’s so out of touch and entitled.

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How many vacations a year do they take?!?
Simon seems sweet and “biddable” as my grandmother would have said, but I am entirely sure that there’s going to be several hellions to come.
And I cannot WAIT to see how she tries to spin it.

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On 10/13/2021 at 2:58 PM, luv2laugh said:

I think she’s going to be pregnant next summer. I think she is eager to brag that having another set of twins hasn’t stopped her. She “gets off” on proving people wrong and shocking people.

If there weren't actual children involved who would be harmed and have to grow up with her and her horrid beliefs, I'd wish for her to get pregnant quickly with triplets every 11 months over and over, all boys. 

But since there are actual kids that would be harmed, I hope she doesn't have any more. I think that's unlikely, though. 

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43 minutes ago, bea said:

How many vacations a year do they take?!?
Simon seems sweet and “biddable” as my grandmother would have said, but I am entirely sure that there’s going to be several hellions to come.
And I cannot WAIT to see how she tries to spin it.

Several (with kids), and don’t forget the smaller 3-4 day trips(mostly without kids)and weekly date nights. For a couple with 10, mostly really young kids, and without FT, paid help, it is ridiculous.

I imagine those 5 younger boys might give her a run for her money. I feel for the girls who will likely be trapped at home as “brother helpers” until they are old enough for marriage.

Edited by SassyPants
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Oh I think the 5 youngest boys are going to kick her ass in the teen years. She acts like she loves the teen years because she’s the cool mom. No you love the teen years because your 2 oldest do what you say. Just wait until the little boys are teens! Ha

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1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Oh I think the 5 youngest boys are going to kick her ass in the teen years. She acts like she loves the teen years because she’s the cool mom. No you love the teen years because your 2 oldest do what you say. Just wait until the little boys are teens! Ha

Yeah exactly. She likes Simon and Ezra because they parent for her. The younger ones might not be so obedient to the woman who barely bothered to parent them.

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Today on IG she gets in all her parental grievances ( twins are horrible sleepers, Shil is a handful, the 4 YO needs help wiping his butt, the teens are surly), but ends with Jesus talk and admonishments about how this is life. She needs to talk to herself before she attempts to school others.

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6 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Today on IG she gets in all her parental grievances ( twins are horrible sleepers, Shil is a handful, the 4 YO needs help wiping his butt, the teens are surly), but ends with Jesus talk and admonishments about how this is life. She needs to talk to herself before she attempts to school others.

She’s describing extremely normal behaviors for those age groups. It’s not like she has 10 kids with extreme medical needs. She seems to have 10 very typical kids that are possibly even easier than some kids their age. Yet she complains constantly. About something she chose. 

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