Gwen Shamblin Lara 17: The Hair Apparant

[CTRLZero]

“tuned into feeding the Spirit of God...”.  Again with the emphasis on food.  I bet Gwod is lecturing God on caloric intake in her version of heaven.  

[ManyGoats]

3 hours ago, TDHuggies said:

While I think the church will go on I believe the golden years are behind it.   

Agreed. I don't think there's any way it could stay the same without Gwen.

I also think we might be overlooking the effects of losing the others who died. They were major supporters/enablers/enforcers of Gwen's. Not only has the church leadership head been chopped off, so to speak, the neck has been severed also. (Sorry for the graphic analogy; I couldn't think of anything else that conveyed my meaning.)

[Blue]

Does anyone have current family/friends in RF open to saying how it's all being handled within the inner circles? Our family/friends would never say anything negative no matter what, so we never know when we're getting the real stories.

[WeirdHarold]

42 minutes ago, Blue said:

Does anyone have current family/friends in RF open to saying how it's all being handled within the inner circles? Our family/friends would never say anything negative no matter what, so we never know when we're getting the real stories.

Same.  My family member wouldn't say anything but sunshine and unicorns about RF.

[Howl]

3 hours ago, Blue said:

Our family/friends would never say anything negative no matter what, so we never know when we're getting the real stories.

and this

3 hours ago, WeirdHarold said:

Same.  My family member wouldn't say anything but sunshine and unicorns about RF.

I've been listening to a few episodes of the Year in Polygamy podcast. Today they discussed Brigham Young's 19th wife and then the next episode was an interview with a woman who studies cults. 

She pointed out that a key element of cult behavior is never, ever criticizing or doubting the cult or (especially) the cult leader, and there is careful policing of each member's behavior to ensure that this is the case. Always saying positive things assured other members that one was loyal to the cult and its leader. 

With the ex cult members that she has counseled and interviewed (including Scientologists and NXIUM escapees), one of the main issues is that when a cult member begins to have doubts, there is NO ONE they can talk to about it.  They have been cut off from family and friends.  They would be reported and harassed or worse if they tried to discuss it with other members. 

9 hours ago, ManyGoats said:

I also think we might be overlooking the effects of losing the others who died. They were major supporters/enablers/enforcers of Gwen's.

Boom! 

[AmazonGrace]

Get Thinspired with Gwen (Now Deceased): Jesus ate nothing for forty days and forty nights, and  he is a good example for all of us to follow.
 

Spoiler

 

Waiting on God’s Plan and His Menu

June 20, 2021

by Gwen Shamblin Lara

0 Comment

Look what happens to the person who is doing it right. They are concentrating on God thru following His lead all day and finding true hunger. They are concentrating on God once they start eating to find the full. They are concentrating back on waiting on the growl in the evening…they are crying out to God. Do not just reach out to others—you need to get down and pray, because the whole point of this is your relationship and Connection with God. Then you will find that you are more connected! It turns out that the very thing where you were out of God’s will in your life, your stronghold, actually ends up being the thing that really builds your relationship with God.

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” Matthew 4:1-4

Jesus was very hungry, and he was tempted, but in the end, he was fed by the Angels. You will be tempted, and you may be really hungry. Head hunger, temptation and physical hunger may all collide at one time. Lies can come in that you have to eat now and that this food does not come around very often. You have to understand that you must stay in the Zone no matter what, because your will has to line up with God’s will. Even if you are growling, it does not mean that you can let go of the “full,” binge out and just keep eating. You have to stay in the will of the  Father with both hunger and fullness.

 

You may be tempted and you may be really hungry, and the devil may lie to you that you should eat. But it doesn't mean you can keep eating. It's not God's will for you to eat, and who are you to defy God?

If you are fed by the Angels it's probably OK.

[throwaway9988]

I would love to know specific examples of members/families, or at least a rough estimate of their numbers, who have left RF since Gwen’s death. Mostly to get a sense of the overall impact on RF, although I’m man enough to admit that the prospect of some more hot goss is exciting. I would bet they still have more than 90% of their original members, but I wouldn’t be disappointed to be wrong!

[RFfamANON]

26 minutes ago, throwaway9988 said:

I would love to know specific examples of members/families, or at least a rough estimate of their numbers, who have left RF since Gwen’s death. Mostly to get a sense of the overall impact on RF, although I’m man enough to admit that the prospect of some more hot goss is exciting. I would bet they still have more than 90% of their original members, but I wouldn’t be disappointed to be wrong!

None of my family members have given any indications of even considering leaving. 

[throwaway9988]

18 minutes ago, RFfamANON said:

None of my family members have given any indications of even considering leaving. 

I haven’t even asked mine because it’s not worth reinitiating contact with them to ask a question I already know the answer to ?‍♂️ 

[Ozlsn]

I think it will take some time for people to leave. The shock of Gwen's death will probably mean they dig in for a while, but I think once things start moving into a new pattern people will pull away.

[AmazonGrace]

That's what I thought too... If there was some major conflict some individuals might exit quickly, or be forced to, but if somebody drifted away because of general disillusionment and unhappiness with the new developments, leaving would probably be a more gradual process. When you're enmeshed  in a cult  there are so many things keeping you stuck.

[church_of_dog]

2 hours ago, Ozlsn said:

I think it will take some time for people to leave. The shock of Gwen's death will probably mean they dig in for a while, but I think once things start moving into a new pattern people will pull away.

I agree -- think about how nearly any community reacts in the face of a tragedy such as a natural disaster or accident or being victimized by a large-scale crime -- they pull together and any existing internal differences even fade at least for a while.

Only later does the change in infrastructure seem to allow or cause people to drift away.

Edited June 20, 2021 by church_of_dog

[JermajestyDuggar]

When Warren Jeffs went to prison, the cult was big in numbers. It’s gone down gradually in the years since. And now the numbers are much smaller than when he first went to prison. I think a big part of people leaving was that Warren made a bunch of rules from prison that no one could follow. He was there in person to keep people in line and he made some crazy rules he couldn’t enforce from prison. So people left gradually. But Warren does have brothers that were trying to enforce the rules. Just like Gwen had plenty of people to enforce her rules. However if the RF higher ups start making new rules, people may leave gradually. 

Edited June 20, 2021 by JermajestyDuggar

[Coconut Flan]

I've been curious that under Gwen did the people who left usually fade away gradually or was it usually a more abrupt I'm gone approach?  I can see people staying during the grieving period for the group support if nothing else.  The more rational ones (if there are any) I would think will evaluate how the organization progresses over the months until about the end of the year.  

[Reallyhatefakes]

After watching yesterday’s service I can’t think that they can run on snippets of Gwen speaking forever it’s a little freaky and I’m sure upsetting to see her glorified as a saint. I see Michael spoke today in support of his sister but I see that they hide him behind a grand piano. 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

I'm wondering about the businesses that Gwen owned and all the RF members who work in them:  Exodus Industries, Weigh Down, RF (church), etc.  Who is running these businesses now? Is everyone who works in them getting paid? Still employed?

David Martin worked for RF. Who is supporting his underage children? This 3 married children are young 20s. I think they all have small children.  Do any of them have the money to raise 2 teenage boys?  

And .... as a BEC I wonder who will move into Gwen's mansion?  Michael because he's the oldest? Elizabeth because she's the 2nd generation prophet? Not that I believe prophet is a trait passed down like red hair.

Edited June 20, 2021 by Red Hair, Black Dress

[Blue]

5 hours ago, church_of_dog said:

I agree -- think about how nearly any community reacts in the face of a tragedy such as a natural disaster or accident or being victimized by a large-scale crime -- they pull together and any existing internal differences even fade at least for a while.

Only later does the change in infrastructure seem to allow or cause people to drift away.

I also agree.

Our family has given zero indication that their faith has been shaken, but I'm not surprised. They are fully immersed right now, and I'm sure still mourning... And mourning is a time when you want to be surrounded with like minded people. My hope and prayer is that cracks in leadership will begin showing by the end of the year. I think that's our best bet.

I think the Warren Jeffs comparison is valid. In the immediate aftermath of his arrest/conviction it seems like most stood behind him and his chosen leaders, but as time went on people got disillusioned with it all. Hopefully we see a similar pattern in RF.

As for the businesses, I would assume they're mostly fine. We have family who work for them and they don't seem concerned. It sounds like the immediate leadership in those ventures wasn't on the plane. I have no doubt RF leadership advised and made decisions, but the day to day seems to be progressing normally (from what we can tell).

 

[rabbitholejulie]

First, I've never posted on a website like this so if I break a rule, know that it isn't intentional.

I've been down the rabbit hole of Gwen Shamblin Lara since the plane crash (thus my user name).  My family moved to Memphis in 1991 and Gwen's mother was our realtor (so besides having a "medical background" Gwen knew a lot about realtors).  It took us a year and a half to find house so we spent a lot of time together and I met Gwen once- but I had no idea that in years since she started a church and married Tarzan!  I'm hoping if I write all of my observations I can quit obsessing...

Gwen's mother, who I will call Mrs. H, was a proper Southern lady- a widow at the time.  She wore her hair (red just like Elizabeth's hair) in a style that was like a picture I saw of Gwen in one of the threads (the picture with the white dress/sophisticated up do).  Mrs H's look was out of the ordinary but not crazy like Gwen's look.  Mrs. H was religious (Church of Christ) but not overly so and she dressed appropriately.  She did give me great advice about fitting in in the South (we moved from the casual Midwest)- including when in doubt, wear a simple black dress...and pearls.

Mrs. H gave me Gwen's first book, it was the original one in a binder with cassette tapes in a plastic page at the back.  The Weigh Down Workshop affected how I eat, still today.  I am a "thin eater" but a healthy eater.  I never, EVER eat the entire dinner at a restaurant- only half.  Weigh Down appealed to my eating disorder tendencies and even though I am in a normal weight range, I am not critical of people who are too thin.

Gwen and her first husband lived in a small but perfect looking house on a side street off of the "old money" golf course.  Mrs. H lived in a larger house on the Parkway- not as nice as Ashlawn but similar...  Gwen's father was a prominent surgeon.  Mrs. H remarried a surgeon, someone her age and...not Tarzan-like.

Those white dresses that appear in pictures/videos my girls referred to as "tablecloth dresses" and they were the norm for upper class Southerners but my girls would never wear one.  Ever.

Joe Lara looks like he found the role of a lifetime.  David Shamblin has to have a lot of thoughts that he can never say out loud.

OK, enough of me.  Thanks for sharing my obsession, now I need counseling.

[marypat57]

On 6/13/2021 at 6:20 PM, waltraute said:

Eulogies:

I've already written out the beginning of mine for my kids to read at my memorial.

"She could turn the world on with her smile. She could take a nothing day and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile."

Hopefully nobody will catch on. 

That sounds like a wonderful beginning to my “words of remembrance “, too.  I even have the picture to go with it.  I always wanted to visit this statue.  A number of years ago, I happened to be in Minneapolis for a teachers union convention.  This was one of the first places my friends and I visited, the second place being the Mall of America.  The statue, donated by TV Land, used to be at the corner that Mary Richards tosses her hat up in the air.  However that summer, there was construction going on in that area, so the statue was relocated to the Minneapolis Visitors Bureau.  

[Howl]

47 minutes ago, rabbitholejulie said:

She did give me great advice about fitting in in the South (we moved from the casual Midwest)- including when in doubt, wear a simple black dress...and pearls.

When I worked with grad students before I retired, a student who had been raised and gone to college in the south gave "Southern Lessons" to a fellow doctoral student from the northeast who'd just gotten a job at a traditional liberal arts college in the Deep South.  It helped! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Whoops! Posted on the wrong thread. Sorry

Edited June 21, 2021 by JermajestyDuggar

[Cults-r-us]

8 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

When Warren Jeffs went to prison, the cult was big in numbers. It’s gone down gradually in the years since. And now the numbers are much smaller than when he first went to prison. I think a big part of people leaving was that Warren made a bunch of rules from prison that no one could follow. He was there in person to keep people in line and he made some crazy rules he couldn’t enforce from prison. So people left gradually. But Warren does have brothers that were trying to enforce the rules. Just like Gwen had plenty of people to enforce her rules. However if the RF higher ups start making new rules, people may leave gradually. 

I think one enemy of keeping FLDS members locked in is social media. Whereas before, shunned and expelled members disappeared into an unknowing abyss, causing fear and anxiety about being kicked out and keeping members in line. Now members look on line and see people who have been kicked out or left are fine (which is not entirely true as I think there is a high rate of substance abuse and suicide in their youth) and their communication is not cut off like before.

I guess same with Gwen's folk. As more leave and their relatives do not see them perishing in hopeless fatness, it will feel safer to venture out from the cult's constraints.

[RFsurvivor]

5 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

I've been curious that under Gwen did the people who left usually fade away gradually or was it usually a more abrupt I'm gone approach?  I can see people staying during the grieving period for the group support if nothing else.  The more rational ones (if there are any) I would think will evaluate how the organization progresses over the months until about the end of the year.  

I’ve seen both ways. For myself, it was a slow fade but I know people who had a meeting with leadership and said I’m out 

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Cults-r-us said:

I think one enemy of keeping FLDS members locked in is social media. Whereas before, shunned and expelled members disappeared into an unknowing abyss, causing fear and anxiety about being kicked out and keeping members in line. Now members look on line and see people who have been kicked out or left are fine (which is not entirely true as I think there is a high rate of substance abuse and suicide in their youth) and their communication is not cut off like before.

I guess same with Gwen's folk. As more leave and their relatives do not see them perishing in hopeless fatness, it will feel safer to venture out from the cult's constraints.

From what I’ve heard, a bunch of folks who got kicked out or left have moved back to the small town where the cult is located. Which I think is a great move. Many of them say they actually loved the area but had to get out of the cult. So now that Warren is in prison, they moved back and live in town on their own terms. 

Edited June 21, 2021 by JermajestyDuggar

[Cults-r-us]

3 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

From what I’ve heard, a bunch of folks who got kicked out or left have moved back to the small town where the cult is located. Which I think is a great move. Many of them say they actually lived the area but had to get out of the cult. So now that Warren is in prison, they moved back and live in town on their own terms. 

And former members provide support and solutions for uneducated women with eleventy kids trying to bail. Members need to know there is hope for a better life.