[CW: Child Sex Abuse] Josh & Anna 31: Charged on 2 LaCounts

[mango_fandango]

Remembering one dumb thing I’ve said is one thing, but that often leads on to me remembering other dumb things I’ve said... ugh. 

[ophelia]

41 minutes ago, Antipatriarch said:

I do something similar; I blurt out an "UGH!" when I remember something embarrassing I did. It's completely automatic, it happens before I can catch it. And of course if I'm not alone, immediately everyone says, "What?" -- but of course I'm not going to tell them what. I have to make some lame excuse.

When something disgusting happens I often tend to laugh. So when one of our cats puked his whole lunch (including two mice) on my boyfriends couch in his office, I couldn't stop laughing. At the same time I found it so damn disgusting that he had to take care of the mess.

Let's just say he was not amused. This happened last week and I'm cooking his favourite meals day in and day out ever since.

[backyard sylph]

1 hour ago, louisa05 said:

If any Duggars really believe they’re important enough for a president to be after them, that’s just pitifully arrogant. 

Also insular and delusional.

[Hane]

1 hour ago, Coconut Flan said:

It's as easy for Discovery/TLC or any network to drop the Duggars as they want it to be.  No one is owed a TV contract and the additional seasons are contract options that are up to the network to exercise or not.

Unless, of course, someone pulls the kind of trick Pat Robertson did with his talk show, “The 700 Club.” (Click here for Wikipedia info.)  Due to contractual conditions when its original broadcasting stations changed hands multiple times, it sits, sticking out like a sore thumb, on the station Freeform (formerly known as ABC Family), which is geared toward young adults aged 14-34.

Edited May 18, 2021 by Hane

[SassyPants]

19 hours ago, QuiverFullOfCondoms said:

I think it’s more for practical reasons. If you’re going to pop out children like the donut machine at krispy kreme you can’t physically care for and baby them too long. You’re always pregnant, recovering from birth or trying to conceive. It’s what the older girls are for.

Until you have older girls is the hard part. Once there are older girls it gets easier.

Can you imagine going anywhere with a gaggle of toddlers, and a baby while pregnant? How the hell did Michelle grocery shop in the early years? She had an almost 7 YO, twin 5 YOs, an almost 4 YO, a 2 YO and 1 YO(literally just turned 1) when Joe was born. I can not imagine. And I think these were the days when JB might have actually had a job.

[Nike]

3 hours ago, ophelia said:

When something disgusting happens I often tend to laugh. So when one of our cats puked his whole lunch (including two mice) on my boyfriends couch in his office, I couldn't stop laughing. At the same time I found it so damn disgusting that he had to take care of the mess.

Let's just say he was not amused. This happened last week and I'm cooking his favourite meals day in and day out ever since.

I crashed my car against my neighbor's wall and knocked it down. I was wondering if the car was behind it and that made me laugh even harder. 

Years later I can laugh about it properly but at the time it was nerves. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

33 minutes ago, Nike said:

I crashed my car against my neighbor's wall and knocked it down. I was wondering if the car was behind it and that made me laugh even harder. 

Years later I can laugh about it properly but at the time it was nerves. 

I laugh when nervous and twice it was really bad and I couldn't stop either time.

One was when my very dignified father fell and couldn't get back up because he hurt his knee (I KNOW!) and the other when two owners of the company I worked for (brothers) got into a huge fistfight in the front office.  Everyone else was staring in horror and I was laughing so hard genuinely afraid I was going to wet my pants.  

[refugee]

6 hours ago, Nike said:

Same here. To make matters worse I sometimes laugh when I'm nervous,  it's very automatic and I live with the fear that I'm going to laugh when giving condolences. I absolutely dread it. 

And now I’m thinking of the classic Mary Tyler Moore episode with the funeral of the clown.

[violynn]

On 5/15/2021 at 11:17 AM, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

The Physiatrist and the Iceman is a fascinating interview with Richard Kuklinski and Dr Dietz. Really explains how nature and nurture can create a broken human.  I’d post a link but y’all know I can’t on this iPhone with my crap connection.  

The interview is three parts but really informative.

Dangit, @Don'tlikekoolaid!  I'd spent an hour already just catching up on THIS thread and now you've done the thing-given me a new documentary!  Nope, 3 docs on the Iceman.  Just finished the last one (three hours later).  I don't think any of us can really pinpoint Josh or any of the Duggar's mental health issues other than to say that absolutely they all need many years of therapy to truly start healing.  

All the talk about how Anna might leave, now she's really going to wake up and divorce him since there's photographic and video evidence her husband is a pedophile is a non-starter.  We know exactly how she is going to react to evidence her man is not who she thinks he is.  She's been through this already.  Josh was sent to Jesus jail for months and months.  She knows what it is like to NOT have to live with him, she knows how it feels to be forced to lean on her in-laws to feed and house her children.  She knows the party line that isn't Josh, it's the Devil in Josh OR he was framed.  Based on her past behavior, how she will deal with this is already laid out.  She's going to pray intensely.  She's going to spend her time figuring out what she did wrong in the marriage to make Josh behave this way.  She's going to joyfully say yes no matter what her body and brain tells her is wrong.  Josh and Anna have already had a long separation while he was in rehab.
I wish I didn't believe this, it makes me ill knowing what is going to happen.  

On something different:  I saw a post about trauma bonding, I've never heard that before and dove in there too.  It makes so much sense to me, it was a visceral reaction once I found more about it.  I've had reactions to situations and ex's but never trauma bonding.  Thank you, op.  

[Bad Wolf]

I thought the singing would be a good idea. However, I just read today about Peter Yarrow and underage girls. Now I have Puff the Magic Dragon stuck in my head. I think I'll go back to the Lord is my Shepherd, because I'm rewatching the Vicar of Dibley.

Wow. Even choosing the right song is hard.

[SassyPants]

At my son’s graduation the Valedictorian gave a speech about the day his grandmother, the woman who had raised him, collapsed in front of him and died. The kid actually said, “ she hit the ground with a big thud.” At which point I started laughing. I could not control it. Good thing I was seated near the back and in a corner. Holy shite, I will never forget it. 

[AussieKrissy]

8 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

It's as easy for Discovery/TLC or any network to drop the Duggars as they want it to be.  No one is owed a TV contract and the additional seasons are contract options that are up to the network to exercise or not.

We are in the midst of spring big four network renewals and cancellations.  It's as easy or easier to cancel the Duggars as it was to end All Rise (among many others).  The decision the network faces is will another show make as much or more money for us.  That's their number one concern.

I hate that it seems like TLC is hedging it’s bets by not announcing it is canceled. All about the dollar. I do think they would make some money (regardless of fucktard asswipe j@$h) for a Jana wedding special if it was timed not around sentencing or trial.  That’s why I think they are not announcing yet. 

My friend and I were driving one night we were teens and we drove past an accident scene where a pedestrian was covered with a sheet and we could see a hand. There was police and ambos and the whole nine yards. It looked like a movie scene. We could not stop laughing. About half an hour later we were racked with guilt. We felt like horrible people why had we laughed??? Someone had died. We went home and lit a candle for the man and said a prayer for him and repentance. We talked about it after and came to the conclusion that it was all so surreal we had no experience with something like that and because of that it felt like we were in a movie scene or a tv shoot. Even now the memories seem so surreal. 

[JenniferJuniper]

2 hours ago, violynn said:

All the talk about how Anna might leave, now she's really going to wake up and divorce him since there's photographic and video evidence her husband is a pedophile is a non-starter.  We know exactly how she is going to react to evidence her man is not who she thinks he is.  She's been through this already. 

Agree, she'll probably wait for him, no matter how long. Arguably, this is worse than what he's done in the past, but is it the worst? What else has he done?  What has he gotten away with over the years that we have no idea about?  We can type away about Josh, but we don't know him.  We don't know how awful he is to deal with in person or what kind of husband and father he really is. But my guess is that he's even more despicable than we imagine.  

To us, this seems like a golden opportunity to get the hell out.  Find a ghost writer and spill the tea on top of the beans. But that's not likely to happen, and she's on record saying she can't imagine working outside the home.  She's got to feed, house, and clothe seven kids and Josh is going to be even more useless now.  So probably in her mind JB is her safest bet.  She's on the property already, there are still enough Duggar girls around to help, and she doesn't have to start over.  If she does break away, I'll be impressed beyond measure, but I don't think she's smart or confident enough to be quite that brave.  

[louisa05]

5 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Can you imagine going anywhere with a gaggle of toddlers, and a baby while pregnant? How the hell did Michelle grocery shop in the early years? She had an almost 7 YO, twin 5 YOs, an almost 4 YO, a 2 YO and 1 YO(literally just turned 1) when Joe was born. I can not imagine. And I think these were the days when JB might have actually had a job.

I have a friend with seven. She grocery shopped with the first set of twins. After the second set were born and she had four kids under 3, her husband took over the grocery shopping.  But they’re not Fundies and he’s allowed to shop for food.  

[Coconut Flan]

7 hours ago, Hane said:

Unless, of course, someone pulls the kind of trick Pat Robertson did with his talk show, “The 700 Club.” (Click here for Wikipedia info.)  Due to contractual conditions when its original broadcasting stations changed hands multiple times, it sits, sticking out like a sore thumb, on the station Freeform (formerly known as ABC Family), which is geared toward young adults aged 14-34.

TLC is NEVER going to write a contract like that.  

[Bethy]

6 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Can you imagine going anywhere with a gaggle of toddlers, and a baby while pregnant? How the hell did Michelle grocery shop in the early years? She had an almost 7 YO, twin 5 YOs, an almost 4 YO, a 2 YO and 1 YO(literally just turned 1) when Joe was born. I can not imagine. And I think these were the days when JB might have actually had a job.

I remember a blog post by Kristina (the one with the Arby's proposal) from 2014 - she hadn't had her fifth (and seemingly final) kid yet, and she posted a picture of "what grocery shopping looks like" which showed her pushing one cart full of toddlers and pulling another packed solid with food, with the then-baby on her back in a carrier. Seeing that stressed me out. And that was four kids, not seven.

[EmCatlyn]

On 5/11/2021 at 2:03 PM, HerNameIsBuffy said:

There is not one person here who has said that, unless I've missed an odd post.  

I agree, and yet the repeated discussions about how “Anna could leave if...” or “Anna might divorce/separate if...” etc. often give me the impression that some of us assume that deep down Anna really wants to leave.  I think we may be projecting our own feelings (in her place we would have left long ago).

[shesinsane]

The headlines say Anna Duggar thinks Biden framed her husband, but she's quoted as saying

Quote

She believes that if Donald Trump was still in power this would not be happening, and refuses to believe he's done anything wrong.

Anna's wrong, Josh is guilty, but I think Anna does have a point about "this wouldn't happen in a Trump administration."

The 45th POTUS has a documented history filled with porn, objectifying girls, payoffs, pardons, etc. Had he won the 2020 election, DHS might have an agency policy to ignore CSA cases. Or a policy where all cases involving connected Republicans have to be approved by Jared Kushner.

 

[Cults-r-us]

22 minutes ago, EmCatlyn said:

I agree, and yet the repeated discussions about how “Anna could leave if...” or “Anna might divorce/separate if...” etc. often give me the impression that some of us assume that deep down Anna really wants to leave.  I think we may be projecting our own feelings (in her place we would have left long ago).

Sadly, I think Anna loves Josh  he is her Smugger Bear. There's no accounting for tastes.

I confess that at the time, I, too, hoped he was sorry for losing his big job at the Jebus Hate Council, lying, cheating and terrible betrayal of everybody and was grateful Anna stayed with him. Who stays in rehab that long and doesn't try to get better? The flip phone and Covenant Eyes were part of accountability.  Anna got her reconciliation baby and thought this chapter ended on a happy note "ashes to beauty".

Now I think she is in the denial and anger stages of grief.

[livinginthelight]

My husband laughs when he doesn't know what to do. Like when I was in labor. My pains were a '10'  and he was giggling uncontrollably.

I was not amused. At all. I told him to stop laughing and he laughed harder.

He felt so badly about it later that I forgave him and I haven't even teased him about it over the years, though he gave me lots of ammunition!

 

[RainbowSky]

On 5/16/2021 at 11:24 PM, Destiny said:

Sabrina definitely has the cat. No, I didn’t just finish my 10th rewatch of Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. You don’t know my life!

Note: Someone in Riverdale may also have a cat. I only made it like 10 episodes in before i got too bored to continue. 

I forgot that Sabrina had anything to do with that world. I don't watch the show you mentioned and am not super into comics so my Sabrina knowledge ends with Melissa Joan Hart...??

[HerNameIsBuffy]

42 minutes ago, Cults-r-us said:

he is her Smugger Bear.

My hand to God I was taking a sip of wine when I read this and actually gagged and now I need to change my pajama top.  

Please never type that again!   

[Dandruff]

1 hour ago, Cults-r-us said:

I confess that at the time, I, too, hoped he was sorry for losing his big job at the Jebus Hate Council, lying, cheating and terrible betrayal of everybody and was grateful Anna stayed with him. Who stays in rehab that long and doesn't try to get better? The flip phone and Covenant Eyes were part of accountability.  Anna got her reconciliation baby and thought this chapter ended on a happy note "ashes to beauty".

Weren't they in some sort of couples counseling after he got back from Jesus jail?  If it wasn't cult counseling, then I wonder whether Anna has recently been in touch with that person for a professional opinion.

[Coconut Flan]

As far as I've seen all the counseling Smuggar got including with Anna was all cult approved Bible, Bible, Bible so basically useless for his problems.

[Marionette]

38 minutes ago, Dandruff said:

Weren't they in some sort of couples counseling after he got back from Jesus jail?  If it wasn't cult counseling, then I wonder whether Anna has recently been in touch with that person for a professional opinion.

 

35 minutes ago, Coconut Flan said:

As far as I've seen all the counseling Smuggar got including with Anna was all cult approved Bible, Bible, Bible so basically useless for his problems.

They never said they who they took counseling from, but I’ve always wondered if  it were Chris & Anne Hogan. They were/are WELL known in IBLP/ATI circles for being “marriage counselors.” I’m unsure of their educational background and what makes them think they’re qualified to be counselors/life coaches, but obviously it’s cult/Bible counseling and not anything that would actually be useful to Josh nor Anna. 

Chris also temporarily took over for Gothard when the scandal hit back in 2015. 

Check out their bio on Embassy Media ?