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Maxwell 47: Vestigial Tales of the Messy Towel Drawer


Coconut Flan

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So Terri has the most boring of the “that’s not my...” books.

Think any of the other families have That’s not my witch? That one is my personal favourite of the series.

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On 5/14/2021 at 2:00 AM, church_of_dog said:

Well what do you expect -- the other guy is brandishing a Pepsi!  :lol:

I think said soft drink was given to the other guy by Nathan himself.  Those were the days when the Maxwells were a bit more generous; I don’t think they do the preaching and teaching at local fairs anymore.

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2 hours ago, Granwych said:

I think said soft drink was given to the other guy by Nathan himself.  Those were the days when the Maxwells were a bit more generous; I don’t think they do the preaching and teaching at local fairs anymore.

Fewer people terrified by Lolly (wasn't that the name of Mary's clown?  Anna?) is always a good thing.

That was creepy af, but I hate clowns.

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They gave Anna a huge amount of credit for the ballooning but it really started out as Christopher’s thing. He even did presentations at conferences about using it as a ministry. And they used to hand out hundreds of sodas (and then switched to bottled water) as well as give people $5 I think it was if they could name all of the Ten Commandments. Lolly the Clown was a one time thing IIRC, and quite a bizarre move for them. 

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4 minutes ago, fundiewatch said:

They gave Anna a huge amount of credit for the ballooning but it really started out as Christopher’s thing. He even did presentations at conferences about using it as a ministry. And they used to hand out hundreds of sodas (and then switched to bottled water) as well as give people $5 I think it was if they could name all of the Ten Commandments. Lolly the Clown was a one time thing IIRC, and quite a bizarre move for them. 

My mom learned how to do balloon animals (don't ask) and to this day my version of hell is the sound of that particular plastic squeak for all eternity.

I don't know if the Maxwells did that or just regular helium filled balloons, but just the word makes my fillings hurt!

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The girls do the face painting thing at the local fair, although I’m guessing that last year and maybe this year were/have been cancelled because of COVID. 

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2 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

The girls do the face painting thing at the local fair, although I’m guessing that last year and maybe this year were/have been cancelled because of COVID. 

I think that’s correct. They usually do their ministry at the fair every year except last year. I think they do a good job with face painting and balloon animals. However it wouldn’t be worth it to me. I couldn’t handle all the god talk just for my kids to get cool balloon animals. 

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I feel like there was a gap in their fair ministry (at least, what we knew about) - in the early blog years, Steve and older ones (and Mel) went to the fair and handed out soft drinks and tracts and did the Good Person Test with people, as well as the occasional balloon animal. The younger ones (Anna, Jesse, and Mary) seemed to be banned from going to the fair at all, so their contribution was stamping contact info on the backs of the tracts before packing them up. There was some flap about them using construction aprons from Home Depot and them saying they would cover up the logo if they used them another year. There was a little humblebrag about all the things that were difficult for them to overcome, like the logistics of chilling and transporting so many drinks, the heat and humidity, and the way people chose to dress 🙄 Then it seems like they stopped going entirely, and then picked up again with the balloon animals/facepainting and then Lolly the Clown in more recent years.

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They weren't getting enough hits on the "good person test" and shouting in people's faces  and tracts. So, they decided to entice kids instead. Clowns, face painting & balloons. That'll bring 'em in! Sucker the kids with shiny objects then ask them where they're going when they die and give them tracts they can't read. 

I've always seen it s their biggest hypocrisy. Steve sheltered his kids to unhealthy levels to keep them from words, ideas and influences he didn't want. His kids were not allowed to interact with anyone, anywhere, ever. Yet, here he & his isolated offspring are, enticing children they don't know with shiny objects. Without knowing what their parents are teaching them, and not caring. 

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I believe the Maxwells bought that gym set specifically so the grandkids don't have to interact with outsiders. Why go to a public playground when they have one on their property? I would really like to know how much interaction they have with kids who aren't cousins. There is a picture of Christopher talking to boys at the fair a few years ago. His oldest son should have been standing beside him, but instead he was awkwardly standing against a wall with a weird look on his face. Then again, he might be just shy. What about Melanie's side of the family? Her kids get to visit them, and I'm sure the older ones noticed a difference by now. 

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5 minutes ago, Tangy Bee said:

I believe the Maxwells bought that gym set specifically so the grandkids don't have to interact with outsiders. Why go to a public playground when they have one on their property? I would really like to know how much interaction they have with kids who aren't cousins. There is a picture of Christopher talking to boys at the fair a few years ago. His oldest son should have been standing beside him, but instead he was awkwardly standing against a wall with a weird look on his face. Then again, he might be just shy. What about Melanie's side of the family? Her kids get to visit them, and I'm sure the older ones noticed a difference by now. 

I do wonder what the kids think about Melanie's family and seeing how people can live differently and not be monsters.  I hope Steve and Teri don't do a number on them about how her family may be going to hell or whatever.

As to the other things...when you have that many small kids it's nice to have playground equipment at home. I took mine to the park, but we also had a lovey Amish built swing set/slide/club house combo in the backyard and I loved it.  And as a kid who spent most of her childhood standing against a wall with a weird look on my face when my parents were talking to strangers I don't think that's a problem.  I don't think he should be necessarily standing next to his dad God bothering people.  In fact I think it's nice he was allowed to be a kid and not have to do that and be the face of their flavor of Christian.

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Posted (edited)

Yes they got the gym set so the grandkids wouldn’t go to the park. Steve thinks if the grandkids are around other kids they will learn bad things he was the same way with his own children. He never wanted his kids to be kids & he feels the same way about his grandkids. 

Edited by Jana814
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1 hour ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I do wonder what the kids think about Melanie's family and seeing how people can live differently and not be monsters.  I hope Steve and Teri don't do a number on them about how her family may be going to hell or whatever.

As to the other things...when you have that many small kids it's nice to have playground equipment at home. I took mine to the park, but we also had a lovey Amish built swing set/slide/club house combo in the backyard and I loved it.  And as a kid who spent most of her childhood standing against a wall with a weird look on my face when my parents were talking to strangers I don't think that's a problem.  I don't think he should be necessarily standing next to his dad God bothering people.  In fact I think it's nice he was allowed to be a kid and not have to do that and be the face of their flavor of Christian.

You made good points about the playground equipment and Chris's son. I forgot kids have awkward moments, but Chris was talking to other kids, just thought he would be interested in listening...but then again he's been listening to that stuff his whole little life.

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1 hour ago, Jana814 said:

Yes they got the gym set so the grandkids wouldn’t go to the park. Steve thinks if the grandkids are around other kids they will learn bad things he was the same way with his own children. He never wanted his kids to be kids & he feels the same way about his grandkids. 

See, this is how the Maxwells take a normal thing like having a swingset in the yard into some weird, creepy, isolationist message.

Most people who have one like it because it's nice for the kids when you're cleaning or making dinner and can't take them to the park, but it's not either or.

They seem to think everything is a decision between two diametrically opposed choices.

Kids can go to school or learn and read at home.  Kids either get sex ed at evil public school or the parents will do it.  Kids can either play in the park with others or only in their own yards.

He has to know even us weirdos who sent our kids to school also read with them, taught them things, raised them with our values, talked to them about sex and all kinds of things to help them get to adulthood without making life changing mistakes.  Parents of faith also discuss that with their kids.  

He went to school.  He knows better.  I assume his childhood was traumatic to make him the way he is, but he wasn't sheltered until he imposed that on himself and his family.  

Honestly, what is he so afraid of?  I have long held that his focus on eye traps, women in the workplace, etc. stems from his own guilt in this area.  Even if he never cheated temptation would be enough to cause massive guilt in someone who wants to control not only his own, but everyone's baser instincts.  I think Steve has strayed, at least in his mind, and is arrogant enough to think if he can be tempted than lesser men (all of them) can't possibly be trusted.

What made Steve the way he is is at the top of my list of unsolved fundy mysteries that drive me crazy.  Because he isn't dumb....he's intelligent enough for me to know there had to have been a hell of a lot of mental gymnastics for him to sell himself on this stuff.  Which to my amateur sleuth brain reads like the catalyst for this legalistic coping mechanism now extending 3 generations has to be a doozy.

Other unsolved fundy mysteries that I need answers to are the Rods finances, the Arndt control methods, and a general Mrs. Kravitz level of curiosity of what's being said behind closed doors at the TTH these days.

 

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7 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Honestly, what is he so afraid of?  I have long held that his focus on eye traps, women in the workplace, etc. stems from his own guilt in this area.  Even if he never cheated temptation would be enough to cause massive guilt in someone who wants to control not only his own, but everyone's baser instincts.  I think Steve has strayed, at least in his mind, and is arrogant enough to think if he can be tempted than lesser men (all of them) can't possibly be trusted.

What made Steve the way he is is at the top of my list of unsolved fundy mysteries that drive me crazy.  Because he isn't dumb....he's intelligent enough for me to know there had to have been a hell of a lot of mental gymnastics for him to sell himself on this stuff.  Which to my amateur sleuth brain reads like the catalyst for this legalistic coping mechanism now extending 3 generations has to be a doozy.

 

 

I think his bio dad leaving the family to be with another woman when Steve was a teenager informs everything he has done since then.

I think he's scared to death that he'll do what his daddy done if he lets up even the tiniest bit of control.

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15 minutes ago, kpmom said:

I think his bio dad leaving the family to be with another woman when Steve was a teenager informs everything he has done since then.

I think he's scared to death that he'll do what his daddy done if he lets up even the tiniest bit of control.

I’m sure his father leaving the family for another woman really messed Steve up. His mother probably had to go to work which I’m sure he wasn’t happy about. So he married a woman who agreed to never work outside the home. 

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9 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

 

He went to school.  He knows better.  I assume his childhood was traumatic to make him the way he is, but he wasn't sheltered until he imposed that on himself and his family.  

Honestly, what is he so afraid of?  I have long held that his focus on eye traps, women in the workplace, etc. stems from his own guilt in this area.  Even if he never cheated temptation would be enough to cause massive guilt in someone who wants to control not only his own, but everyone's baser instincts.  I think Steve has strayed, at least in his mind, and is arrogant enough to think if he can be tempted than lesser men (all of them) can't possibly be trusted.

What made Steve the way he is is at the top of my list of unsolved fundy mysteries that drive me crazy.  Because he isn't dumb....he's intelligent enough for me to know there had to have been a hell of a lot of mental gymnastics for him to sell himself on this stuff.  Which to my amateur sleuth brain reads like the catalyst for this legalistic coping mechanism now extending 3 generations has to be a doozy.

My theory is that there's something in his past that he's trying to make up for. Whether it's something we know about (the accidental glimpse down a woman's blouse) something we can easily conjecture (the constant harping about their internet accountability software) or something from his teenage years or military time that he'll never fully detail even for his family, I don't know, but it's been my experience that quite often people who go whole hog into some sort of self-flagellating legalism are trying to atone for something they did in the past - like Michelle and her bikini-clad lawn mowing days.

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Serious Q: What constitutes “touching the poop?”  
 

Asking because I just did some very rudimentary research on Maxwell geography (literally) from my home 2 states away. No contact with them. 

And I’d love to talk about what I found out (which anybody can find, searching on any public library computer).

But my hands have been unslapped for most of my FJ life snd I’d like to keep them that way. 

So, before I type another word about the Maxii, please, what is forbidden?

And thank you!!! 

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Posted (edited)
45 minutes ago, MamaJunebug said:

Serious Q: What constitutes “touching the poop?”  
 

Asking because I just did some very rudimentary research on Maxwell geography (literally) from my home 2 states away. No contact with them. 

And I’d love to talk about what I found out (which anybody can find, searching on any public library computer).

But my hands have been unslapped for most of my FJ life snd I’d like to keep them that way. 

So, before I type another word about the Maxii, please, what is forbidden?

And thank you!!! 

Poor touching is where you're contacting them (irl or virtual) or creeping on them and either coming here for encouragement or to get head pats after.  Like trying to brigade people to write reviews on Sarah's books without reading them or slamming their comment section in an orchestrated attempt.  Or tracking their movements.  Back in the day when people were tracking the Duggar planes and orchestrating people being at the airport to see them and the use of burner phones etc. was seriously creepy poop touching, even though flight plans are public information.  

Going to see them at a scheduled public event isn't poop touching if you're not claiming to represent FJ and don't harass them....and you'd be free to talk about that here.  

Just like if you went to a wedding and the Arndts (or Christopher) were the photographer(s) then of course you can post about seeing them there.  Posting that they always go to fill up their cars on Tuesday mornings at the Shell station where you wait and watch for them to get a pic....then do not post that here and get professional help immediately.  :) 

I don't know what info you have but if it's about property they own or sold etc. that's fine.  If it's how to enter their property without being seen so you can steal their garbage and go through it looking for Pepsi cans then a big nope.  If it's public info it's usually fine, unless it gets into weird stalking territory like the plane stuff did.  

If you aren't sure you can PM me or one of the other mods and check before posting, but public info is almost always okay.  

 

Edited by HerNameIsBuffy
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So it's another baby for the John Maxes. Yawn. But announcing it with a pic of Chelsy in jeggings and an extremely formfitting shirt? WHAT'S HAPPENING IN MAXHELL? I had to look outside my window to see if pigs were flying by. 😱

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On 5/15/2021 at 2:41 PM, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Fewer people terrified by Lolly (wasn't that the name of Mary's clown?  Anna?) is always a good thing.

That was creepy af, but I hate clowns.

I am confused by the name Lolly. The Maxwells are friends with Lolly Hale from the Buckingham-Hale family. She illustrated some of the Moodys books. Why would you name a clown who looks like a drug hallucination after your nice fundi childhood friend? Is Lolly (the original) very funny or especially fond of clowns? Did she give her consent to use her name like that?

And aren't clowns a kind of entertainment? Is entertainment okay, if you try to lure heathen kids?

 

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6 minutes ago, Austrian Atheist said:

I am confused by the name Lolly. The Maxwells are friends with Lolly Hale from the Buckingham-Hale family. She illustrated some of the Moodys books. Why would you name a clown who looks like a drug hallucination after your nice fundi childhood friend? Is Lolly (the original) very funny or especially fond of clowns? Did she give her consent to use her name like that?

And aren't clowns a kind of entertainment? Is entertainment okay, if you try to lure heathen kids?

 

That costumes comes with the name Lolly. (The costume did not come with the extra tulle to extend the length of Lolly's slutty. short skirt). (And why do I remember having Googled it way back when Lolly first showed up?)

 http://www.halloweencostumes.org/kids-lolli-the-clown-costume.html

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I’m shook.

They actually posted the picture of Chelsy in her very tight skinny jeans on the Maxwell blog. I really thought they would crop them out! Is Steve softening on his stance on pants!? What is going on? What is life?

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4 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’m shook.

They actually posted the picture of Chelsy in her very tight skinny jeans on the Maxwell blog. I really thought they would crop them out! Is Steve softening on his stance on pants!? What is going on? What is life?

I think they should have some custom Colorforms made so Steve can put a frumper on any woman not up to his sartorial standards.  I picture him sticking them to his monitor and having to move them as he resizes his windows and such.  

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