Gwen Shamblin Lara 15: [29 May 2021] Gwen, Joe & 5 Others Presumed Dead in Plane Crash

[Hane]

@Xan, Gwen’s musing about the “miracle” of cows producing milk despite an all-grass diet reminded me of Lara The Lazy Organizer, whom we discussed back in the day and who has gone off line. (The Lazy Organizer was famous for radical reduction of physical objects in her home, and fantasizing about packing up her passel of kids with maybe two outfits apiece and living on the road in a camper.) Lara felt that filling her kids up on plain steamed vegetables should give them adequate nutrition because “that’s what cows do.”

Gwen and Lara seem not to realize that COWS CAN DIGEST CELLULOSE AND HUMANS CANNOT. You’d think a registered dietitian would have learned this, but who the fuck am I.

Edited May 8, 2021 by Hane
Fat-fingering and Formatting From Hell.

[NarcissismKills]

Where's Joe?  No really, where is he?  Inquiring minds want to know.

[AmazonGrace]

Lactating cows are given calcium supplements, but sure, it's a total miracle. 

[ElleHouston]

Maggie had weight loss surgery a couple of years back. It doesn’t surprise me that she gained some weight back. 

[RFsurvivor]

1 hour ago, ElleHouston said:

Maggie had weight loss surgery a couple of years back. It doesn’t surprise me that she gained some weight back. 

Oh really? I’m surprised. I can’t bring myself to watch the video but I wonder if that’s just ignored. 

[Xan]

15 minutes ago, RFsurvivor said:

Oh really? I’m surprised. I can’t bring myself to watch the video but I wonder if that’s just ignored. 

I admit to zoning out from time to time while the video ran but I don't remember any mention of surgery.  All credit is given to Weigh Down and Gwen.

[ElleHouston]

6 minutes ago, Xan said:

I admit to zoning out from time to time while the video ran but I don't remember any mention of surgery.  All credit is given to Weigh Down and Gwen.

An ex-RF member told me that she drove Maggie to the hospital the day of surgery. 

[AmazonGrace]

We are all different and it's fine as long as you're thin

Under the spoiler,  Gwen action figures. 

Spoiler

 

[Ozlsn]

Got to say her makeup choices seem to be getting odder. Maybe it's the screen shots, but it looks bizarre to me.

[Botkinetti]

Bizarre and unhealthy.
I realize she is wearing a ton of makeup and contouring her face so it gives the appearance of high sharp cheekbones but she must startle people when they see her in person. 

[AmazonGrace]

You are not to worry about the scales but if your weight is not going down you're doing everything wrong.

Apparently Gwen's calendar has Mother's Day in its usual place. We learn that parents are a concept that exist solely because God wants more praise.

Not because, you know, humans are mammals who reproduce sexually,  and without "parents" there would be nobody to think about this.

[bloopbloopdoop]

On 5/8/2021 at 5:56 PM, AmazonGrace said:

Smith bond hearing? What does the front row guy have to smirk about?

idk. i think that's ted ? he gives me bad vibes

[AmazonGrace]

16 hours ago, Ozlsn said:

Got to say her makeup choices seem to be getting odder. Maybe it's the screen shots, but it looks bizarre to me.

The eyebrows are a mystery to me. They're such a broad smudge on on the inside and such a thin line on the outside? Is it symbolic of WeighDown? at first you were fat and then you got thinner.  (the pic is from joe's FB)

[AmazonGrace]

Gwen can't tell you that exercise is bad for you but you can tell she'd want to

So weird she's against chewing specifically. 

[quiversR4hunting]

On 5/8/2021 at 1:55 PM, Xan said:

Your body needs about "90% carbohydrates"

Oh I so wish!!! Carbaholic right here! Thankfully I know to do portions and balance (most days). 

WTH is up with the heavy long under the eye line that goes up her nose? Thanks @Xan for the screenshots and recap. I can't handle listening to any of these wackados. 

[Xan]

3 hours ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Oh I so wish!!! Carbaholic right here! Thankfully I know to do portions and balance (most days). 

WTH is up with the heavy long under the eye line that goes up her nose? Thanks @Xan for the screenshots and recap. I can't handle listening to any of these wackados. 

I don't understand her makeup at all.  Why would someone draw their eyebrows down to the corner of their eye?  She's seriously going for a raccoon look here.  And the dark lipstick just ages her more.  

I understand that she's having trouble accepting that she's 66 years old but it's time she faced the truth.  Even with what appears to be plastic surgery on her face, the rest of her body gives it away.  Exhibit A:  (elbows)  Full disclosure:  I, too, have crepey elbows but I'm okay with it.

Spoiler

 

Edited May 11, 2021 by Xan

[Hane]

Full disclosure: I am 68 and a Woman of Vast Scope and Dimension (aka plus-sized), who wouldn’t be let into the door of House o’ Gwod. Facially, I’m not much to look at, either.

Still, I’m taken aback by women in my age group who strive to be as thin as possible and whose makeup gets more and more overdone and whose hair gets more and more overprocessed. I’m not talking skilled makeup that’s intentionally done for dramatic effect—I’m talking what I see on Gwen and JRod. Doesn’t anyone have the ‘nads to talk to them? We had the same situation at work with a really brilliant manager (who was on the “artistic” side outside work) but who piled on so much amateurish makeup that people seeing her for the first time had their jaws drop open.

I’ve also read that extreme dieting can pose a cardiac risk to women over 60. (I don’t mean careful, nutritionally sound eating plans.)

[throwaway9988]

Maybe Gwen watched the Queen’s Gambit recently and wanted to try some 60s mod makeup. 

 

although, she has been drawing her eyebrow down to the corner of her eye for a while, still not sure what that is about. Making the eye look lower and saggier is usually not the goal. 

On 5/8/2021 at 1:55 PM, Xan said:

Maggie does have a moment later and she's saying that she prays more now and has her prayers answered.  She started praying at a stoplight and it turned green for her.  

 

Yes, red lights tend to turn green fairly soon after you stop at them. Classic Remnant answered prayer lol. Call me when one of them regrows an amputated limb or something interesting

Edited May 11, 2021 by throwaway9988

[Blue]

19 hours ago, throwaway9988 said:

Yes, red lights tend to turn green fairly soon after you stop at them. Classic Remnant answered prayer lol. Call me when one of them regrows an amputated limb or something interesting

Yeah but if you tell them that, then they respond with "Oh, so you're saying God CAN'T change lights?"

Of course I'm not saying that. I'm not even saying that he WON'T change lights. I'm saying that drawing a line from a traffic light changing to finding favor with God is ridiculous. Does it mean He DOESN'T find favor with you... not necessarily... it just doesn't mean he does either. But they will find any tiny thing and use it as proof that God is happy with them.

[meep]

So I never looked at these threads before because, well, there's so many fundies, it's hard to find the time to know them all! But yesterday I had extra time and I went all the way back to the first thread and read the first few pages. This lady looks like the gift that will keep on giving. 

The thing about her makeup is it actually makes her look older. I had no idea she is only in her 60s. She looks 80-something. 

[AmazonGrace]

41 minutes ago, Blue said:

Yeah but if you tell them that, then they respond with "Oh, so you're saying God CAN'T change lights?"

Of course I'm not saying that. I'm not even saying that he WON'T change lights. I'm saying that drawing a line from a traffic light changing to finding favor with God is ridiculous. Does it mean He DOESN'T find favor with you... not necessarily... it just doesn't mean he does either. But they will find any tiny thing and use it as proof that God is happy with them.

Good thing that God is happy with so many heathens too since the lights all seem to change for them too ...  Just imagine the   chaos if Gwen got in the traffic  behind a long line of fat heathens who have been   stuck in the red lights for hours because God thought sinners don't deserve the green lights... 

Today's Rinse and Repeat has Gwen thinking drinking water makes you fat. Imagine her snarkiest mean girl voice, "Well, all right, sweetheart, if you MUST exercise, I'm sure it's FINE, but you may not be aware  that a gallon of water weighs 8.34 lbs and it's really gross to be so well hydrated."

  Gwen thinks her mind is right so it doesn't matter that everything else is wrong. 

She is just so insane... Everyone else that talks about weight loss tells you to exercise and drink more water.    

[Blue]

33 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

Good thing that God is happy with so many heathens too since the lights all seem to change for them too ...  Just imagine the   chaos if Gwen got in the traffic  behind a long line of fat heathens who have been   stuck in the red lights for hours because God thought sinners don't deserve the green lights... 

Exactly... But in our experience, telling them that is like screaming at a brick wall. 

It's like the Bible flopping... They could open up to Numbers and find some way that the number of men in the tribe of Gad is telling them that God is proud that they waited for the growl ?

I really hate to sounds snarky though... We truly love people in RF... But they can't see logic... Literally, they can't. If they see logic and it leads them to the logical conclusion that Gwen is wrong, they'll lose everything. 

[smittykins]

23 hours ago, Hane said:

I am 68 and a Woman of Vast Scope and Dimension (aka plus-sized),

I’m totally stealing this. 

[AmazonGrace]

Something I posted recently gave me this earworm:

At first I was obese, I was overweight
Kept thinking I could never lose it unless I amputate
But then I spent so many nights thinking how to become thin
And I will win
And I learned how to become slim
You just don't eat
Plant based or meat 
 You just wait until you're hungry and then you just don't eat
I should have locked that stupid fridge, I should have tossed the stupid key
If I'd known for just one second I’d have another panini

Go on now, go, wait for the growl
Just wait  around now
'Cause I'm not throwing in the towel
Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with a meal?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd sit down and eat?

Oh no, not I, I will lose weight
Oh, as long as I know how to starve, I know I'll celebrate
I've got all my empty plates
And I've got a lot of mass to hate and I'll lose weight
I will lose weight, hey, hey

It took all the strength I had at the a la carte
Kept trying hard to toss the pieces of my lemon tart
And I spent oh-so many nights just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry
But now I hold my head up high and you see me
Somebody thin
I'm not that nourished person still in love with food
And so you felt like dining in and just expect me to eat too
Well, now I'm saving all my evenings for someone who's slimming me

Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to break me with a bite?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd have the appetite?

Oh no, not I, I will lose weight
Oh, as long as I know how not to eat, I know my life’s complete
I've got all that food to toss
And I've got no more strength to floss and I'll lose weight
I will lose weight

[SuperNova]

2 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

 

Today's Rinse and Repeat has Gwen thinking drinking water makes you fat. Imagine her snarkiest mean girl voice, "Well, all right, sweetheart, if you MUST exercise, I'm sure it's FINE, but you may not be aware  that a gallon of water weighs 8.34 lbs and it's really gross to be so well hydrated.

This is why Gwen always looks so dessicated. She probably has a serious fear of water weight. Can't look bloated if you're dry as a bone.