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Gwen Shamblin Lara 15: [29 May 2021] Gwen, Joe & 5 Others Presumed Dead in Plane Crash


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On 5/20/2021 at 10:44 AM, AmazonGrace said:

Gods Against Swimming bring you this hard-to-read meme:  image.png.80fcfeba30ab3cc05f561b48d2bc5d41.png

 

OK, I see at LEAST three easily recognizable song lyrics in there. Has she been listening to an 80's/90's radio station? First we get a paraphrase of "I'll be the hero you're dreaming of" from Glory of Love by Peter Cetera, which also made me think of "holding out for a hero" by Bonnie Tyler. Then he has fought for our right (to PAAAAARRRRTTTTAAAAYYY?) like the Beastie Boys rapped about. Then we get "love and devotion" which I am sure is in at least 2-3 songs, but reminded me of both "love and affection" by Nelson and "lost in emotion" by Lisa Lisa.

This one reminded me of nothing so much as a time I was watching a panel discussion by the band Abney Park, and the singer Robert Brown kept up for about 5 full minutes throwing their song titles or lyrics into every single sentence. It was hilarious!

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Any word on Joe?  It's been six months since they posted the last "Life with Gwen and Joe".  Is he still involved?  Has he been disappeared like Shelly Miscavige, the wife of the Scientology leader?  Do we need to put his picture on the sides of milk cartons?  

Gwenny -- what's happened to Joe?

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14 minutes ago, Xan said:

Any word on Joe?  It's been six months since they posted the last "Life with Gwen and Joe".  Is he still involved?  Has he been disappeared like Shelly Miscavige, the wife of the Scientology leader?  Do we need to put his picture on the sides of milk cartons?  

Gwenny -- what's happened to Joe?

Maybe he gained three pounds and is banned from being on camera?

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On 5/22/2021 at 8:09 AM, AmazonGrace said:

When I am really tired, I get completely horizontal—no pillow—so my heart can rest.

What? I am not a medical professional, but doesn't the heart rest if you rest? If her heart only rests when she is laying completely flat I would guess that something is wrong. Being raised a couple inches by a normal pillow should not make your heart stressed. But hey, what do I know? I don't play a dietitian on the internet and at the pulpit. 

On 5/21/2021 at 9:36 AM, AmazonGrace said:

Why is it hard to select foods? As a child, you ate what your mother cooked for you; when you went to school, you ate what the public government schools prepared and demanded that you eat; as you got older, you started dieting and ate what the latest program or magazine told you to eat. In fact, have you ever sensed what you wanted?

I ate what was served when I was I kid (besides chili, I finally asked my mom (age around 10 or 12) if I could skip dinner when she made it; then she realized I really hated chili and let me make myself a sandwich on chili day). Did I like everything served, nope but the food was fine. And as I got older my mom would ask for suggestions or I would make a suggestion and help make food. When I was on my own (in the college dorm) I ate what looked/smelled good. When I moved into my own apartment, I ate at the restaurant (waited tables) or made myself food- whatever I wanted and what my budget could afford. Want to know what I never did? Look at a magazine for the magazine to tell me what to eat. Gwen Shamblin Lara is batshit crazy by lack of nutrition, IMO. 

33 minutes ago, Xan said:

Any word on Joe?  It's been six months since they posted the last "Life with Gwen and Joe".  Is he still involved?  Has he been disappeared like Shelly Miscavige, the wife of the Scientology leader?  Do we need to put his picture on the sides of milk cartons?  

Gwenny -- what's happened to Joe?

I wonder if something is happening with his custody arrangement and his ex-wife is not having their child go over to the cult leader's lioness lair. 

I really hope the child is not being subjected to the RF cult. 

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1 hour ago, Alisamer said:

Then we get "love and devotion" which I am sure is in at least 2-3 songs

 

It gave me this earworm.

´

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45 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

I wonder if something is happening with his custody arrangement and his ex-wife is not having their child go over to the cult leader's lioness lair. 

I really hope the child is not being subjected to the RF cult. 

She certainly was when I was there. At first she looked a bit shell-shocked. Then she realized that by being with that crew she gets "princess" status and seemed pretty happy being up onstage etc. But I haven't seen a service in a while. Is she gone??

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15 minutes ago, Willow said:

She certainly was when I was there. At first she looked a bit shell-shocked. Then she realized that by being with that crew she gets "princess" status and seemed pretty happy being up onstage etc. But I haven't seen a service in a while. Is she gone??

I hope that child is not allowed to be at that church. I hope her mom has wised up about RF and the influence on her daughter. 

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4 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

It gave me this earworm.

 

In addition to this , here is an even older song I just found .  

Spoiler

 

 

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Daily Regurgitation has been previously fact checked

so I will just point out that while people who eat fewer calories do tend to be thinner it has nothing to do with the volume necessarily. If you eat a larger volume of chocolate, sure, you get more calories... but if you add more water to your soup you get more volume but no extra calories that would make you any fatter. 

And the internal logic of this post is non-existent. She jumps from the dangers of omega3 capsules to not-eating with the WeighDown hunger and fullness regime to the French (who, by the way, are not known for being particular devotees of not-eating Weighdown style)  and then goes on to volume... but if it's large serving sizes and volume that make you fat why the hell does she fear tiny Omega capsules that have the volume of, well, something tiny, and can only be described as a small serving size.

On Gwenstagram:

kuva.png.d315f5ba50f71637dfc3bbe3c5727b1e.png

Jesus' main job was  to get executed... Don't try this at home. 

Public Service Announcement: If you replace your children's meals by vague platitudes about God's work I am going to sic the police and child protection services on you.

Edited by AmazonGrace
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On 5/26/2021 at 12:52 AM, AmazonGrace said:

And finally, longevity is not influenced  just by your diet, it's also your exercise, your genes, your environment, your medical care...

Your smoking status. Definitely your smoking status, which is one reason the Greek lifespan is lower I suspect (unless things have changed a lot!)

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5 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Jesus wants you not to worry and Gwen wants you extremely concerned that everything you have ever done, said or thought  is a vice. 

Gwenstagram: 

Screenshot_20210527-193454__01.thumb.jpg.f698e103344f17418a94e7ead704fdcf.jpg

Never forget to buy too much food.  That way you always have some extra so you can toss the leftovers.  Jesus loves people who waste victuals.

 

Jesus hops around on one foot then ?  Look at the picture . 

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Going a bit OT here as I muse about Gwen’s hair. How does she wash it and manage to get all the product out? How badly damaged must it be? What machinations must she go through to make it look the way it does?

And if it’s actually a wig, where does she go to purchase a monstrosity like that?

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https://youtu.be/XIQrTE5wBao

OMFG. her dress is somehow wider than her hair... 

It looks shorter on the back now. I wonder if she gets it done at the hair salon, with all of the extensions and bump its for the hairdressers to comb through? I'd be way too embarrassed.

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I will never understand why Gwen thinks her hair is a good look. Before she became this leader, she used to have normal hair.

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21 minutes ago, bloopbloopdoop said:

https://youtu.be/XIQrTE5wBao

OMFG. her dress is somehow wider than her hair... 

It looks shorter on the back now. I wonder if she gets it done at the hair salon, with all of the extensions and bump its for the hairdressers to comb through? I'd be way too embarrassed.

She looks like a little girl who is trying on her big sister's clothes.  This hideous dress doesn't even fit right.  I honestly don't understand.  She has to have seen this video before she allowed them to post it.  Doesn't she realize what a sad little clown she looks like?

Spoiler

401060546_Screenshot(4805).png.d38a31e2f30b6594f372d0a69ab0e7ae.png1883458769_Screenshot(4804).png.2fcd9026c38469a3a99bea82894d1476.png

 

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She is a cross between a picnic table and Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island. Mary Ann wore it better. And seriously, crinoline under a tablecloth dress? 

image.png.ab22a94cb26ca7b65bbe440531061bf0.png

And (BEC) I haven't seen tied straps on anyone older than 5 years old since the 1970s/80s

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I don't know why she uses (self-tanner?) on her body and pale foundation on her face. It makes her look very unwell. Maybe her followers are too afraid to give her advice about her hair and make up but you'd think someone close like maybe her daughter would try or someone would hire a make-up artist to be the bearer of the bad news and make suggestions?

Edited by luv2laugh
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51 minutes ago, luv2laugh said:

I will never understand why Gwen thinks her hair is a good look. Before she became this leader, she used to have normal hair.

Yeah, this is one of the fundy mysteries along with JRod finances, Steve Maxwell's secret shame, and Arndt everything about which I most want answers.  

It also doesn't look comfortable or clean.  I know everyone is different, but back in the 80s when I'd use half a can of Aquanet I hated how my hair felt.  I don't do it around others as I know it can bother some people, but when I'm thinking I play with my hair a lot...hers looks like it would just be gross to touch and it always looks dirty.  Is looks ratted....is she able to wash that regularly?  

I love Tim Minchin and deliberately messy hair is part of his schtick, but his always looks clean.  

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13 minutes ago, luv2laugh said:

I don't know why she uses (self-tanner?) on her body and pale foundation on her face. It makes her look very unwell. Maybe her followers are too afraid to give her advice about her hair and make up but you'd think someone close like maybe her daughter would try or someone would hire a make-up artist to be the bearer of the bad news and make suggestions?

She doesn't seem like the kind of person who takes suggestions well.

Since quarantine I stopped wearing makeup for the most part, and haven't worn it much since just out of laziness.  My daughter mentions it now and then....when she was in town she offered to do it almost every day.  She says it doesn't bother her, but she does keep offering and bought me some for my birthday :)   I take suggestions about as well as Gwen as I sit here barefaced at my desk! 

 

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21 minutes ago, luv2laugh said:

I don't know why she uses (self-tanner?) on her body and pale foundation on her face. It makes her look very unwell. Maybe her followers are too afraid to give her advice about her hair and make up but you'd think someone close like maybe her daughter would try or someone would hire a make-up artist to be the bearer of the bad news and make suggestions?

Whenever I have viewed makeup artists that transform their face, they use highlighter a lots lighter than their skin then put another layer of foundation (?) to make the illusion. Per Allure: 

Quote

Try Highlighter

If that shiny-old-lady look creeps you out, you're not alone—it creeps us out, too. But there is a way to use highlighter to your advantage. Dab a very sheer formula just on the cheekbones, not on the brow bones, the apples of the cheeks, or the lips. "It prevents the flat-face look," says Reiss-Andersen. "It adds a very subtle, youthful, and pretty dimension to your features." 

start about 4:29 to see the foundation and then highlighter. there is a lot of different videos about doing makeup for 50+ and the ones I found with 70+ don't use the highlighter, they just use a little darker foundation to get a same color/smooth look. (I only did a very quick google search of make up videos)

 

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9 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

She doesn't seem like the kind of person who takes suggestions well.

Since quarantine I stopped wearing makeup for the most part, and haven't worn it much since just out of laziness.  My daughter mentions it now and then....when she was in town she offered to do it almost every day.  She says it doesn't bother her, but she does keep offering and bought me some for my birthday :)   I take suggestions about as well as Gwen as I sit here barefaced at my desk! 

 

I love makeup but it's been ages and ages since I wore any. And during this pandemic I've discovered that literally the less I do to my face the better my skin looks. My sisters and I started a youtube channel and I have deliberately not worn makeup in any of the videos - I don't want to set that precedent and feel like I have to do myself up every time I'm on camera. This is me, barefaced, as is. I figure people will make fun of my weight before my face, anyway. 

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5 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Whenever I have viewed makeup artists that transform their face, they use highlighter a lots lighter than their skin then put another layer of foundation (?) to make the illusion. Per Allure: 

start about 4:29 to see the foundation and then highlighter. there is a lot of different videos about doing makeup for 50+ and the ones I found with 70+ don't use the highlighter, they just use a little darker foundation to get a same color/smooth look. (I only did a very quick google search of make up videos)

 

I think she looks younger in the before pic.  Just me?

Fwiw I have just recently discovered wine (not that it existed, but one that I like) and I've noticed when I buy it at the grocery store (super fancy grocery store wine, so glamourous) I get carded 90% of the time and without make up maybe 40% of the time.   So the world at large clearly thinks I look younger with makeup for whatever that's worth.  

(Here they need to card if you look under 40....seems extreme to me but that's the law.)

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Where does Gwen get her clothes? Does she have stuff custom made?

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