Justin and Claire 3: Always Beige

[Travelfan]

I was so happy when I was pregnant because it meant I could eat all the snacks and crap I wanted and I didn’t have to worry about gaining weight. I looked at it as 9 months free of not having to worry about watching what I ate. Clearly I’m in the minority here. I figured I’m gonna be heavy being pregnant anyway might as well eat that extra piece of cake or buy that candy bar at the checkout.  That was one of the best parts of being pregnant to me!

[just_ordinary]

3 hours ago, Travelfan said:

I was so happy when I was pregnant because it meant I could eat all the snacks and crap I wanted and I didn’t have to worry about gaining weight. I looked at it as 9 months free of not having to worry about watching what I ate. Clearly I’m in the minority here. I figured I’m gonna be heavy being pregnant anyway might as well eat that extra piece of cake or buy that candy bar at the checkout.  That was one of the best parts of being pregnant to me!

I am really jealous. I had GD with all my pregnancies. Thankfully, I was able to control it by diet only but that meant quite the strict discipline. I told my husband, the second the cord was cut I wanted a Coke, Chocolates and Crisps. I even made a list of all the things I wanted immediately in the first week. It’s also funny how you start craving things just because you can’t have them atm. 
The only upside was that I never gained more than the recommended minimum (which is around 19,5lbs/9kg if you start within the normal weight range) and lost them within two weeks after birth. 
I dealt ok with it in my first pregnancy, but in my second I had extremely miserable phases where all I could think about was the food I couldn’t have.

Edited March 24, 2022 by just_ordinary

[CarrotCake]

23 hours ago, Travelfan said:

I was so happy when I was pregnant because it meant I could eat all the snacks and crap I wanted and I didn’t have to worry about gaining weight. I looked at it as 9 months free of not having to worry about watching what I ate. Clearly I’m in the minority here. I figured I’m gonna be heavy being pregnant anyway might as well eat that extra piece of cake or buy that candy bar at the checkout.  That was one of the best parts of being pregnant to me!

I did the same, and now being 3 months postpartum I still use it as an excuse not to be skinny yet 😉

I should starting losing babyweight soon but for now, I'll give it another month.

[SassyPants]

I had my kids in the era when some doctors were very strict about weight gain, and I had an OB group with that philosophy.  I guess in the long run it was better for my health and my kids were both 7 lbs, so it was all good. I  do remember working with a group of OBs that was comprised of all female docs and they were the most inflexible (this was late 70s early 80s)about weight gain. They even had a pregnancy diet plan 😒.  One time a patient asked one of the doctors (an older, shorter, stouter woman) why she didn’t use her own diet plan. 

[feministxtian]

I'm fat. No way around it, it is what it is. I don't care anymore. I'm still healthy (mental problems and arthritis not withstanding). I'm pretty careful with what I eat but I'm totally anti-exercise. My Mr. could literally eat himself into a coma and if he gained 5 pounds it was a victory. He was about 6' tall and at his heaviest weight about 160. His "normal" was between 130 and 140. I swore I watched him eat and put on the 10 pounds for him

Short of lipo, a tummy tuck and a boob lift, this is how this body is. I gave birth to 3 little humans, dealt with all sorts of shit. My weight is so far down on my list of shit to worry about...but, I've had numerous doctors tell me that losing weight will fix the facet joint syndrome in my neck and lumbar spine, will magically cure the arthritis in my shoulders (I don't get it), and cold weather will no longer hurt the broken (and healed) bones in my feet. This is why I refuse to go to a doctor. I'm 58. They'd do lab work and twist shit so they can prescribe a bunch of meds. Then they'll want to play with my psych meds..changing meds, dosages, all that shit. No, I'm good. 

Well, gotta roll...off to the weekly faculty meeting that I have to start attending (invite went from "optional" to "required")

[just_ordinary]

I am always surprised when the topic weight-doctors comes up. It seems (but I might be very wrong) that this stigmatisation is very open in the USA even though statistically more overweight people live there. You would think that if a nation is heavier in general certain recommendations get adapted. Like, the recommended weight gain in pregnancy for “normal” starting weight is definitely more in the US than here (and iirc our minimum is more in line with the maximum in France). Clothing sizes/cuts don’t translate but you really have to look and something it’s still cut for a different body type. I am not saying stigmatisation around weight doesn’t happen here. It most definitely does and it does in the medical field. But it seems that US doctors are way quicker on average to dismiss you because of your weight. Which is just baffling, if they deal with more overweight people. 
I am also missing nuances in that discussion as a whole. There is a difference between having the odd extra 2-5kg, being chubby, being overweight, being fat or being obese. And depending on where you are, your status is not the same. And while at one point too much weight most definitely does affect your physical health negatively, especially in the slightly overweight areas it is very individual and not easy to say. Bodies are different. And while too much weight increase the risks for certain health issues, there is no definitive outcome. Just like some people smoke and die perfectly healthy if old age and some people with a healthy life die horrible of lung cancer. That’s statistics. They are pretty much unable to say something about the individual but only about an average correlation. A good doctor should have learned about this (before university to be honest. Statistics is thought in school in math and in politics/socioeconomic courses) and make a more individual assessment. That’s why we don’t just type in stuff in Google and let a machine diagnose us. Insurance companies obviously base their general service on general data. But there should be some flexibility. It’s sad that we see court fights to make them pay for procedures if doctors and experts have written comprehensive reports why an individual should get this or that procedure. Often enough it’s the very cold calculation, that fact x (let’s stay with weight) is statistically having a negative impact on the result and it’s therefore in x % a waste of money because it won’t work well or at all. And while I get this, there should be more wiggle room.

 

[SassyPants]

With the exception of Africa and Antarctica, I have traveled pretty extensively. I’d say beyond Asia, most of the people in other areas tend to be on the heavy vs the slim side of the charts. If you factor in BMI, which I know many people despise, the US might not be among the heaviest. You have to factor in people who are genetically short. When looking at BMI, and I know many HCP no longer use that measurement, your height factors in heavily. Just as an example in So America where my daughter lives, she is considered tall. She is 5-2” and teeny, tiny, but not in her new country where she towers over many women and men.  When we visit people stare at my 6’ tall husband. He is a giant there, but very average in the US. Hard to not be considered overweight by BMI when you are only 5’ tall, and yes, to the eye many of these 5’ tall people are too heavy. Now if we are talking big vs heavy, yes, many Americans are bigger/taller. 

[just_ordinary]

On 3/26/2022 at 11:52 PM, SassyPants said:

With the exception of Africa and Antarctica, I have traveled pretty extensively. I’d say beyond Asia, most of the people in other areas tend to be on the heavy vs the slim side of the charts. If you factor in BMI, which I know many people despise, the US might not be among the heaviest. You have to factor in people who are genetically short. When looking at BMI, and I know many HCP no longer use that measurement, your height factors in heavily. Just as an example in So America where my daughter lives, she is considered tall. She is 5-2” and teeny, tiny, but not in her new country where she towers over many women and men.  When we visit people stare at my 6’ tall husband. He is a giant there, but very average in the US. Hard to not be considered overweight by BMI when you are only 5’ tall, and yes, to the eye many of these 5’ tall people are too heavy. Now if we are talking big vs heavy, yes, many Americans are bigger/taller. 

I think it’s very interesting how the “norm” measurements differ. And also the recommended BMI ranges or ideas of normal weight differ massively. In my own country I am average to short but with pretty normal weight. In comparison in other countries around us my height would be considered average but my BMI would be on the lower side, or my height is average to short but my weight is more on the heavier normal side. And compared to some Asien standards I am definitely overweight looking at my height/weight ratio.

BMI can be a useful tool in certain areas (on a theoretical, statistical level), but only one part of a patients assessment. A doctor should definitely have more tools and angles (anything else is just lazy and does not require years of tertiary and practical training) and insurance companies need to find better ways to get both approaches aligned  

 

[feministxtian]

I remember a couple of guys that hubs served with in the Navy. By BMI they were "obese". However, their body fat percentages were low. They were both into bodybuilding and their body fat percentage was down around 5%. Can't be "obese" with a 5% body fat. 

Not excusing my fat ass though...but if someone wants to give me shit about it, fuck 'em. 

[therulesofjinx]

I had a physical at the end of February and I was mentally prepared for my doctor to bring up my weight (I've gained a fair amount since the start of the pandemic) especially since I've been having joint pain. I did list on a form that I've gained weight and all he asked was "are you concerned about it? what do you think caused it?" and he never commented that I should try to lose nor did he bring up BMI or diet changes (I had told him I was working with a registered dietitian, so maybe he figured I was good there). Instead, he listened to all my issues and concerns, ordered tests for my thyroid and rheumatoid arthritis, just to check, and I ultimately ended up being diagnosed with a genetic disorder that, among many other things, causes joint pain. I was actually slightly amazed that he did not once mention losing weight. He did recommend a bit more exercise just for mental and cardiovascular health. The whole appointment ended up being less stressful than I was anticipating, and very thorough for which I was thankful. So thorough, in fact, that I was there for TWO HOURS!

[JermajestyDuggar]

I’m glad my doctor didn’t shame me for my weight gain when I was pregnant. It would have done nothing but make me feel like shit in an already hard pregnancy. 

[LiterallyBananas]

On 3/28/2022 at 1:09 PM, therulesofjinx said:

I had a physical at the end of February and I was mentally prepared for my doctor to bring up my weight (I've gained a fair amount since the start of the pandemic) especially since I've been having joint pain. I did list on a form that I've gained weight and all he asked was "are you concerned about it? what do you think caused it?" and he never commented that I should try to lose nor did he bring up BMI or diet changes (I had told him I was working with a registered dietitian, so maybe he figured I was good there). Instead, he listened to all my issues and concerns, ordered tests for my thyroid and rheumatoid arthritis, just to check, and I ultimately ended up being diagnosed with a genetic disorder that, among many other things, causes joint pain. I was actually slightly amazed that he did not once mention losing weight. He did recommend a bit more exercise just for mental and cardiovascular health. The whole appointment ended up being less stressful than I was anticipating, and very thorough for which I was thankful. So thorough, in fact, that I was there for TWO HOURS!

What a fantastic PCP - empathetic and thorough. Love that for you. ❤  If you don't mind sharing, what were you diagnosed with? I instantly thought of Ehlers Danlos... curious how far off my gut instinct was. 

Every year my PCP tells me I need to exercise more, and I'm given patient education on regular exercise. I realize it's kind of a "check all the boxes" obligation on her part, but I always want to ask her how much she actually exercises. Should I formally exercise? Yes. But I also work 12 hr shifts on my feet that wear me the f out. And I take the stairs when I can, park my car so I have to walk a bit more, am constantly working on house projects, etc. That has to count for something. 

[therulesofjinx]

8 hours ago, LiterallyBananas said:

I instantly thought of Ehlers Danlos... curious how far off my gut instinct was. 

You are 100% spot on...very, very likely Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos, but I got a referral to Rheumatology for further testing and hopefully some guidance on if I should be doing certain exercises, taking certain supplements, etc., and more knowledge on how it could affect me as I get older.

[QuiverFullofBooks]

4 hours ago, therulesofjinx said:

You are 100% spot on...very, very likely Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos, but I got a referral to Rheumatology for further testing and hopefully some guidance on if I should be doing certain exercises, taking certain supplements, etc., and more knowledge on how it could affect me as I get older.

I’m so sorry. I know two people who have it and it’s awful. You might want to look into online support groups. 

[IsmeWeatherwax]

@therulesofjinx I was diagnosed with EDS 12 years ago, and then all 4 of my kids were also diagnosed. The biggest headache and stress for us is finding out which local anaesthetics actually work, lidocaine is the worst, a full dose lasts 5 minutes tops. Articaine is super, max dose lasts 1 hour to the minute lol but damn was I happy it worked long enough to have 2 teeth taken out! My son had mepivicaine when having his ingrown nails dealt with, again max dose was 1 hour. 

If you want to chat about EDS and all the issues,  please message me!

[GuineaPigCourtship]

I just saw their wedding video clip - about 6 minutes long - on reddit and I found Pecan to do one of the better officiating jobs I've seen in the family.  I most associate him with the stories he wrote on their website which are awkward as heck, but I can imagine him as a compelling pastor.  It really is a shame about all the hateful beliefs he can probably spread more effectively.

[ToriAmos]

So I guess no one thinks Claire is pregnant (based on Boob saying Jostin #3 is number 30)? 

[marmalade]

8 minutes ago, ToriAmos said:

So I guess no one thinks Claire is pregnant (based on Boob saying Jostin #3 is number 30)? 

She could be waiting until Justin's 20th birthday in a couple weeks to announce. That way it erases all the stigma of a teen dad.

Edited November 2, 2022 by marmalade
Weeks not days!

[ToriAmos]

They don't care about teen mums in the same way, do they!

[CanadianMamam]

8 hours ago, ToriAmos said:

So I guess no one thinks Claire is pregnant (based on Boob saying Jostin #3 is number 30)? 

I think it is either her or Jessa. If it is Claire, I think we will find out after Justin's birthday. 

[Tangy Bee]

It feels like they have been married longer than a year. Definitely hope these two wait to have a baby...but we all know that's probably not going to happen.

[Mama Mia]

33 minutes ago, Tangy Bee said:

It feels like they have been married longer than a year. Definitely hope these two wait to have a baby...but we all know that's probably not going to happen.

They’ve been married 20 months. So coming up on two years. Definitely the longest wait between wedding and pregnancy of any Duggar couple. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

What an idiot. Rainbows can’t belong to anyone. They are water mist and light you doof. 

[GuineaPigCourtship]

As we head into June, let's hope all these assholes give us reminders why they're pieces of absolute garbage so nobody has any doubt.

Edited June 2, 2023 by GuineaPigCourtship
their =/= they're

[Father Son Holy Goat]

1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

What an idiot. Rainbows can’t belong to anyone. They are water mist and light you doof. 

The gays!