Erin & Chad 7: Reckless Behavior in a Pandemic Has Consequences

[nelliebelle1197]

Erin and Chad had some bad news on the fertility front. I am not sad. Not really. I mean, she has healthy kids and why not focus on the ones alive rather than worry about making more? Right?

And she may have had COVID TWICE, or had it once and it never went away. Because the Bates are awful people and exactly what is wrong with America in 2021 in one giant shiny pretty package.

 

[dawn9476]

I am sure she's going through a tough time now but I think it will really sink in when Whitney or Alyssa get pregnant with their 5th. I know Alyssa says they could be done with four b/c of her sickness during pregnancy but her forgetting all about it and getting pregnant with a fifth wouldn't shock me. And I say Whitney and Zach have their 5th by the end of 2022 or early 2023.

Edited March 5, 2021 by dawn9476

[Angelface]

Pure speculation....

I wonder if Erin’s probable lack of future children may influence some of the others. For example, I think that Zach may find it easier to say that six is enough and for Whitney to agree if Erin isn’t continually having babies. It might have a knock on effect on some of the others. Alyssa may have another but she may decide to stick with four if Erin isn’t having more kids - they seem quite competitive to me. Josie may “only” have six or so especially after her hard labour with Willow and Kelton’s mother’s death. I think that the family have said that Tori will have the most children so I don’t think Erin’s situation will alter her plans. But the others, well, maybe. If Erin’s medical issues result in the other kids having smaller families it will ( imho) be better for them all. 

[Jackie3]

1 hour ago, Angelface said:

Pure speculation....

I wonder if Erin’s probable lack of future children may influence some of the others. For example, I think that Zach may find it easier to say that six is enough and for Whitney to agree if Erin isn’t continually having babies. It might have a knock on effect on some of the others. Alyssa may have another but she may decide to stick with four if Erin isn’t having more kids - they seem quite competitive to me. Josie may “only” have six or so especially after her hard labour with Willow and Kelton’s mother’s death. I think that the family have said that Tori will have the most children so I don’t think Erin’s situation will alter her plans. But the others, well, maybe. If Erin’s medical issues result in the other kids having smaller families it will ( imho) be better for them all. 

Erin can't have more. I don't see why that would make it easier for anyone else. If they can have more, they should--that's the narrative.

With that said, I don't think Zach/Whitney will have any trouble stopping when they want to stop. We all do things that the older generation doesn't like, I'm sure Zach and Whitney do already. They aren't financially dependent on them (so far as I know). Gil and Kelly aren't going to cut them off. Zach seems pretty independent-minded, and I doubt he wants 19. I'm sure when they want to stop, they'll stop.

[justmy2cents]

1 hour ago, Angelface said:

Pure speculation....

I wonder if Erin’s probable lack of future children may influence some of the others. For example, I think that Zach may find it easier to say that six is enough and for Whitney to agree if Erin isn’t continually having babies. It might have a knock on effect on some of the others. Alyssa may have another but she may decide to stick with four if Erin isn’t having more kids - they seem quite competitive to me. Josie may “only” have six or so especially after her hard labour with Willow and Kelton’s mother’s death. I think that the family have said that Tori will have the most children so I don’t think Erin’s situation will alter her plans. But the others, well, maybe. If Erin’s medical issues result in the other kids having smaller families it will ( imho) be better for them all. 

If they’re leaving it up to god then Erin’s situation has no bearing on other couples decisions.

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, justmy2cents said:

If they’re leaving it up to god then Erin’s situation has no bearing on other couples decisions.

And if Erin/Chad were leaving it all up to God, well, God seems to have spoken, and there is no need for them to announce it to the world. If they were really leaving it up to God, they’d gracefully accept and quietly move on. Damn, it’s got to be hard when your words come back to bite you on the backside.

[Angelface]

1 hour ago, justmy2cents said:

If they’re leaving it up to god then Erin’s situation has no bearing on other couples decisions.

I am not convinced that they are really “leaving it up to God”. I know that that’s what they SAY but, atm, none of them are drowning in children. I think that they have to talk the talk but I’m really not convinced that most of them will walk the walk. Michaela, Erin and Tori seemed the most likely to follow in Gil and Kelly’s footsteps. Nathan seems fairly steeped in the coolaid but it may be a different story when he has to provide and help take care of lots of children. I don’t know about the three middle boys. The rest of them, well, my take on it is that the girls will stop at six and if there is any criticism from their parents their head ships will become the scapegoat. Little Callie is quite the Princess with far fewer childcare / domestic responsibilities than her elder sisters. I can’t see her choosing a life of domestic drudgery. I could be complete wrong but I really don’t think the couples following in Gil and Kelly’s footsteps is a done deal at all. Maybe this is just wishful thinking on my part but I really can’t see Carlin, Josie or Alyssa having double figure families, six hopefully, but no more than eight.

[nokidsmom]

21 hours ago, SassyPants said:

And if Erin/Chad were leaving it all up to God, well, God seems to have spoken, and there is no need for them to announce it to the world. If they were really leaving it up to God, they’d gracefully accept and quietly move on. Damn, it’s got to be hard when your words come back to bite you on the backside.

This is where fundies making public announcements about family size/planning, over and over, prompting public speculation and questions, is not such a good idea.  And I am talking about a lot of the fundies we discuss here, not just Chad and Erin.   Because when something unforeseen happens like what happened with Erin, or Michael's infertility, it makes all the harder to bear.   The private disappointment / pain is compounded by the publicity.  And it's hard to stop questions from people that are now painful when before you basically encouraged those questions by making public statements.

Edited March 6, 2021 by nokidsmom

[Jackie3]

1 hour ago, nokidsmom said:

Michael's infertility

I'm just pointing out that it could easily be Brandon's infertility. We know that it's just as likely. It's inaccurate to assume it's the woman every time, 40% of the time it's the guy (and 20% of the time it's unexplained).

Edited March 6, 2021 by Jackie3

[FrumpyAtheist]

15 minutes ago, Jackie3 said:

I'm just pointing out that it could easily be Brandon's infertility. We know that it's just as likely. It's inaccurate to assume it's the woman every time, 40% of the time it's the guy (and 20% of the time it's unexplained).

No, on one episode of BUB Michael and Brandon visit Dr. Vick and discuss the fertility testing they've already had, and they state that Brandon has been tested and his sperm are fine; the problem is definitely on Michael's side.

[nokidsmom]

13 minutes ago, Jackie3 said:

I'm just pointing out that it could easily be Brandon's infertility. We know that it's just as likely. It's inaccurate to assume it's the woman every time, 40% of the time it's the guy (and 20% of the time it's unexplained).

Yes I know though I didn't make it clear, perhaps I should have.  My main point was that things don't go always to plan and unexpected things arise whatever the cause. 

[llucie]

3 hours ago, FrumpyAtheist said:

No, on one episode of BUB Michael and Brandon visit Dr. Vick and discuss the fertility testing they've already had, and they state that Brandon has been tested and his sperm are fine; the problem is definitely on Michael's side.

Didnt they say in that episode that the infertility was unexplained? that means its not on anyone side.

[rebeccawriter01]

2 hours ago, llucie said:

Didnt they say in that episode that the infertility was unexplained? that means its not on anyone side.

Logically, but the wording was that they had not found any issue on Brandon's side and that there had not been any conclusion regarding issues on her side. I would be surprised if Michaela doesn't view it as her issue rather than a fully unknown cause. In many cases the woman is assumed to be the one with the issue, as there are presumably more reasons for their to be a problem with the female equipment than the male equipment. The testing is easier to rule out male issues because they are a little more straightforward. Yes, statistically it is about even that it is Brandon rather than her. However, if he truly has been ruled out, then it would indicate there is a problem on her side that just hasn't been found yet.

 

Edited March 7, 2021 by rebeccawriter01

[FrumpyAtheist]

4 hours ago, llucie said:

Didnt they say in that episode that the infertility was unexplained? that means its not on anyone side.

Unexplained so far but only because Michael hadn't yet had the full course of fertility testing to see if a cause could be found. She said all they'd done was test Brandon and see whether she was ovulating, then on that episode Dr. Vick conducted a hysterosalpinogram to see if her fallopian tubes are blocked, and they saw that one was definitely not blocked but the other was inconclusive. Michael had not yet had hormonal testing to see if she has a luteal phase defect (basically egg can't implant due to insufficient womb lining), or cervical mucus hostile to sperm (IUI can help with this), is ovulating too early or any number of the other hormonal causes of infertility. My guess is they have not gone through all these tests due to cost since it's tens of thousands of dollars. She ended the episode by saying they would not due any further testing for now after the hysterosalpinogram, but this was 2 years ago now so maybe she's had testing since then.

[marmalade]

Only two years? I thought it was more like three or four. They got married in 2015. I just can't recall how long it took for them to start testing? 

[Mom to Nell]

I don't believe Brandon was ever "fully" tested". To fully test the male, he has to go in and to provide a sperm sample via masturbation in the doctors office. Brandon would never have done this because it is considered a sin.  Brandon may have done an ultrasound, but definitely not a sperm test. My brother had both tests done (ultrasound and sperm test ) and he had poor "swimmers" which was the reason for infertility. I don't know if Dr. Vick would even encourage Brandon to have this test. And if the doctors in Chicago were recommending a sperm test, that may be why that they went back to Tennessee to see Dr. Vick. Also in the patriarchy cult they would always want to blame the woman, not the man.  So sad.

Edited March 7, 2021 by Mom to Nell
Added thought

[bal maiden]

Aren't there special condoms for catching a sperm sample, for those to whom bashing the bishop is just unacceptable?

[JermajestyDuggar]

I think Michael could help him so it’s technically not masturbation. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

We went through fertility treatments and testing and my husband was able to do the job in his own just fine. But he did say the little room was so weird. He said there were super old porn magazines and some cheesy video tapes. He thinks porn is more hilarious than sexy so that was no help. 

[freethemall]

On 3/8/2021 at 5:45 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

We went through fertility treatments and testing and my husband was able to do the job in his own just fine. But he did say the little room was so weird. He said there were super old porn magazines and some cheesy video tapes. He thinks porn is more hilarious than sexy so that was no help. 

The question wasn't whether he can do it, it's that he'd be uncomfortable with the whole idea of masturbation and porn and all that since it's seen as sinful in their culture.

[JermajestyDuggar]

9 hours ago, freethemall said:

The question wasn't whether he can do it, it's that he'd be uncomfortable with the whole idea of masturbation and porn and all that since it's seen as sinful in their culture.

Like I said upthread, Michael could help without any porn. They could even do it at home if they lived close enough to the clinic to get it there fast enough. 

[becky_m2001]

Someone must have said or done something really nasty to Chad Paine's sister-in-law, Dakota. This is what her Instagram acct looks like right now. I know she was getting some negativity about having three kids so close together, but talk about locking down your social media...

[CaptainFunderpants]

8 hours ago, becky_m2001 said:

Someone must have said or done something really nasty to Chad Paine's sister-in-law, Dakota. This is what her Instagram acct looks like right now. I know she was getting some negativity about having three kids so close together, but talk about locking down your social media...

I'm sorry, I'm not the biggest user of IG, what would the point of this be? Just a scrapbook for yourself?

I could see only allowing approved friends/family followers, but zero followers? Maybe a contest account?

[becky_m2001]

20 minutes ago, CaptainFunderpants said:

I'm sorry, I'm not the biggest user of IG, what would the point of this be? Just a scrapbook for yourself?

I could see only allowing approved friends/family followers, but zero followers? Maybe a contest account?

I have no idea what happened. This is just her regular account. I don't think she would have need of a contest account. I think the comments about 3 kids in 3 years finally got to her.

[CaptainFunderpants]

Just now, becky_m2001 said:

I have no idea what happened. This is just her regular account. I don't think she would have need of a contest account. I think the comments about 3 kids in 3 years finally got to her.

Apparently she was getting comments from her own family then. And this is the family with a daughter that they arranged to marry a convicted sex offender.

Yet three kids in three years is where they draw the line? WTF.

I just don't get why she wouldn't keep her family as followers.