Safe At Home 6: PIGS ARE FLYING! Luke is Engaged!

[JermajestyDuggar]

34 minutes ago, usedbicycle said:

I also know some pretty controlling parents but they don't have 14 kids! It seems impossible to exert that much control on that many adults. Most fundie families have a few kids go rogue/cut off ties, or else they soften their rules over the years to accommodate their childrens' evolving standards. Especially with the youngest.

The fact that none of this has happened with the Ardnts makes me think that the children themselves have become Rick's enforcers. Mark and Paul seem really deep in kool-aid in the prayer meeting videos. I can see them being just as controlling as Rick was towards them. They keep each other in check, that's for sure.

I agree. That’s basically what I said upthread. You aren’t just going against Rick. You’re going against the whole family. If all of them are like this, any rebellion must be squashed down by everyone. 

[Howl]

21 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I agree. That’s basically what I said upthread. You aren’t just going against Rick. You’re going against the whole family. If all of them are like this, any rebellion must be squashed down by everyone. 

I'd be curious how their finances are structured.  I'd bet that no one has a separate savings account -- one big Arndt fund with expenditures ultimately approved/controlled by Rick? 

If true, a major reason that breaking away would be incredibly difficult.  No car, no savings, no shelter, no funds, no cell phone, no nothing -- certainly no way to be able to marry and set up a household with a new bride. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

7 minutes ago, Howl said:

I'd be curious how their finances are structured.  I'd bet that no one has a separate savings account -- one big Arndt fund with expenditures ultimately approved/controlled by Rick? 

If true, a major reason that breaking away would be incredibly difficult.  No car, no savings, no shelter, no funds, no cell phone, no nothing -- certainly no way to be able to marry and set up a household with a new bride. 

They have to make decent money. With their photography and stenography. 

[Anne Of Gray Gables]

On 3/11/2022 at 4:37 AM, Bluebirdbluebell said:

According to fundie wiki,

the oldest is 40 something and the next oldest is almost 40, the next six kids are in their 30s, then five kids in their twenties, then the last one is in his teens. 

I saw a video of Rick's a few weeks ago.  He said he was going to "visit Paul" who he says lives a 10 minute drive away from the family house. I can never watch too much of him, but I kept watching to see if he'd give us a glimpse of the place, but no, doofus Dad decided to drive up a muddy and hilly unpaved path in the woods and got stuck. He ended the video saying he was calling Paul to help pull him out.

So where does Paul live? Who does Paul live with? Does Paul live in a house? Does Paul live in a tree-house?  Or does he live in a Tim-cel Rodrigues type of camper in the woods?

I know "the guys", meaning the oldest sons, supposedly live in some house on Arndt property, but he was clear about it being "Paul's house" and it was several miles away so I found this kind of intriguing. 

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

54 minutes ago, Anne Of Gray Gables said:

I saw a video of Rick's a few weeks ago.  He said he was going to "visit Paul" who he says lives a 10 minute drive away from the family house. I can never watch too much of him, but I kept watching to see if he'd give us a glimpse of the place, but no, doofus Dad decided to drive up a muddy and hilly unpaved path in the woods and got stuck. He ended the video saying he was calling Paul to help pull him out.

So where does Paul live? Who does Paul live with? Does Paul live in a house? Does Paul live in a tree-house?  Or does he live in a Tim-cel Rodrigues type of camper in the woods?

I know "the guys", meaning the oldest sons, supposedly live in some house on Arndt property, but he was clear about it being "Paul's house" and it was several miles away so I found this kind of intriguing. 

 

At one point, we figured out that some of the older brothers moved just down the road from the Arndt house. But I would say it wasn’t 10 minutes. More like 3.

[Anne Of Gray Gables]

9 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

At one point, we figured out that some of the older brothers moved just down the road from the Arndt house. But I would say it wasn’t 10 minutes. More like 3.

That's what I thought. I think he's referred to that house before.  But Rick brought us along for the drive to "Paul's house" and it was a few miles.  

[gustava]

Could the manboys be considered incels?  Or simply asexual?

[sableduck]

2 hours ago, gustava said:

Could the manboys be considered incels?  Or simply asexual?

For all we know, Paul is having fantastic wild orgies at his house at the end of the mud road.

Like the Maxwells and many others, the Arndts really only show us what fits their brand and what they want us to see.

[Howl]

2 hours ago, gustava said:

Could the manboys be considered incels?  Or simply asexual?

I honestly don't think they are either.  How could one spawn 13 or 14 asexual men? I don't think they are incels in the sense of men who who consider themselves losers and have given up on seeking a relationship with a woman. It's more like a family monastery.  But, as @sableduck astutely notes, 

35 minutes ago, sableduck said:

...the Arndts really only show us what fits their brand and what they want us to see

I'm curious now.  The Arndts live in an immaculate home, inside and out.  Why would the older males not have a decent gravel or paved driveway? 

Edited March 16, 2022 by Howl

[Anne Of Gray Gables]

1 hour ago, Howl said:

I honestly don't think they are either.  How could one spawn 13 or 14 asexual men? I don't think they are incels in the sense of men who who consider themselves losers and have given up on seeking a relationship with a woman. It's more like a family monastery.  But, as @sableduck astutely notes, 

I'm curious now.  The Arndts live in an immaculate home, inside and out.  Why would the older males not have a decent gravel or paved driveway? 

If you mean Paul's supposed place, Rick apparently had a choice to use a more normal roadway or driveway but he said he wanted to try going through the woods.  Didn't work out for him.

As for their lifestyles, we have zero idea what is really going on. 

[Howl]

50 minutes ago, Anne Of Gray Gables said:

Rick apparently had a choice to use a more normal roadway or driveway but he said he wanted to try going through the woods.

In the mud?????? I know when I'm podcasting from my car I always attempt routes on muddy roads with a good possibility of becoming stuck...which could result in the rescuer becoming stuck,  and so on. 

Paul: Hello? Dad?  

Rick: I tried going the back way on the muddy road and now I'm stuck.

Paul: (under his breath) Oh FFS!  (out loud): Sure Dad, be right there! 

[NachosFlandersStyle]

Oh wow, I just went snooping and realized that I have spent a lot of time hiking within just a few miles of the Arndt home... definitely can be muddy and hilly around there but also not exactly the wild backcountry.

[wolfi_fox]

On 3/8/2022 at 12:15 PM, Howl said:

*darkness warning*

If Rick did indeed decide to destroy that relationship and the adult son allowed it to happen, it's an extremely clear indicator of the incredibly unhealthy, abnormal dynamics in that family.  Perhaps Rick did it "pour encourager les autres." 

We joke and josh about the family. 

• so normal (!)
• the guys are so gosh darned cute (!)
• PENGUINS (!)
• Cathy's white shorts
• court reporters
• amazing wedding photography
• Vine Valley

but don't consider that there is likely a very, very dark aspect of suppression and mind control going on, overseen by Rick and enabled by Cathy. 

Any aspiration not about staying Safe at Home (and baseball) totally stunted early on; some part of every boy's psyche had to be destroyed to maintain Arndt Safe at Home hegemony.  

I honestly can't think of any other explanation for the Arndt monastery w/ 40-yr-old men sharing rooms with bunk beds and who knows whats going on with the daughter. What man interested in her could ever live up to a bazillion perfect brothers?

And not completing Vine Valley? WTAF.  WTAGDF. 

 

 

I was just watching a documentary about this tiger guy Doc Antle who pretty much brainwashed people. At like 30, he was pretty much brainwashing and abducting 12-15 year old virgin girls...and sleeping with them. I think that is 100% about feeling powerful and in absolute control. Really creeped me out. Maybe Rick gets a thrill of power out of brainwashing and controlling his 14 children. Honestly can't think of any other reason he wouldn't let them pursue relationships...unless he wants the family line to end with the kidults.

[wolfi_fox]

On 3/15/2022 at 12:42 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

They have to make decent money. With their photography and stenography. 

Their photography is SO FREAKIN EXPENSIVE!

[church_of_dog]

11 hours ago, Anne Of Gray Gables said:

If you mean Paul's supposed place, Rick apparently had a choice to use a more normal roadway or driveway but he said he wanted to try going through the woods.  Didn't work out for him.

 

Although it doesn't explain anything and in fact only deepens the Essential Arndt Mystery, what you wrote here sounds downright Vine Valleyish:  Rick trying to walk/drive through the woods and constantly falling down/getting stuck in the mud...  I wonder if he had any pumpkins in the car.

Edited March 17, 2022 by church_of_dog

[thoughtful]

20 hours ago, church_of_dog said:

 I wonder if he had any pumpkins in the car.

Freshly-washed, lovingly dried pumpkins.

[nokidsmom]

On 3/16/2022 at 11:34 PM, wolfi_fox said:

Maybe Rick gets a thrill of power out of brainwashing and controlling his 14 children. Honestly can't think of any other reason he wouldn't let them pursue relationships...unless he wants the family line to end with the kidults.

The need for control likely drives out all other considerations, like maybe wanting grandchildren, future generations of the family, etc.

I know of parents who thought that somehow they would have grandkids in spite of controlling their children to the point it was not going to be possible.  And when of course, when any grandkids predictably did not come along, they sure didn't look into the mirror for the reason why. 

Edited March 20, 2022 by nokidsmom

[JermajestyDuggar]

35 minutes ago, nokidsmom said:

The need for control likely drives out all other considerations, like maybe wanting grandchildren, future generations of the family, etc.

I know of parents who thought that somehow they would have grandkids in spite of controlling their children to the point it was not going to be possible.  And when of course, when any grandkids predictably did not come along, they sure didn't look into the mirror for the reason why. 

I agree. They don’t see it as their fault. They likely see it as the fault of all the not good enough people that wasted their children’s time trying to date them. I’m sure they think there are perfect partners out there. But none came along to date their children. And that’s not their fault! 🙄 when in reality, we all know that if a millionaire perfect Christian came along to sweep their daughter off her feet, that person would have something wrong with them too. 

[nokidsmom]

24 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I agree. They don’t see it as their fault. They likely see it as the fault of all the not good enough people that wasted their children’s time trying to date them. I’m sure they think there are perfect partners out there. But none came along to date their children. And that’s not their fault! 🙄 when in reality, we all know that if a millionaire perfect Christian came along to sweep their daughter off her feet, that person would have something wrong with them too. 

I know parents who still found reasons to object even when a potential partner did meet (by chance) all their "important" criteria such as same race, European ethnicity, same religion, same educational attainment, same socioeconomic background.   All stuff they said that was important until it actually happened.  Then began the ticking off of things that were wrong.

BTW that potential partner was Mr. No.

[Triplet3]

Luke is still with his girlfriend and her name is Catherine Cox. It’s mentioned on the Fundie weddings/relationships thread.

[Black Aliss]

16 minutes ago, Triplet3 said:

Luke is still with his girlfriend and her name is Catherine Cox. It’s mentioned on the Fundie weddings/relationships thread.

And perhaps Paul is with someone too but would prefer his/their life not be shared online.

23 minutes ago, Triplet3 said:

Luke is still with his girlfriend and her name is Catherine Cox. It’s mentioned on the Fundie weddings/relationships thread.

Thank you for that info. I see on the Desiring God FB page, there's a thread on avoiding materialism. And Luke commented a year ago:

Spoiler

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Who will photograph an Arndt/Cox Wedding?

I hope they aren’t cocks. 
 

[Anne Of Gray Gables]

2 hours ago, Triplet3 said:

Luke is still with his girlfriend and her name is Catherine Cox. It’s mentioned on the Fundie weddings/relationships thread.

You can access her FB page through Jude. They are a couple for sure.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

I hold a tiny spark of hope Luke will marry his girlfriend and they will move far away from the mothership.

However I remind myself that having a girlfriend does not equal getting married and having a wife.  

I can see Rick pitching a freaking fit about a marriage and only agreeing if Luke and Catherine agree to live in the mothership after the wedding., and Luke continues to help support the family.

So many questions about how that would would work, Would Catherine become a new character in Vine Valley?  Would she have to wear white short shorts and her hair in 2 braids?  Would they have to sleep in bunk beds?  

[justmy2cents]

36 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

I can see Rick pitching a freaking fit about a marriage and only agreeing if Luke and Catherine agree to live in the mothership after the wedding., and Luke continues to help support the family.

So many questions about how that would would work, Would Catherine become a new character in Vine Valley?  Would she have to wear white short shorts and her hair in 2 braids?  Would they have to sleep in bunk beds?  

Already got that covered 😂

 

Spoiler

 

Edited March 20, 2022 by justmy2cents