M is for Mama 9: Mom of Ten, Dislikes Them All

[danvillebelle]

3 hours ago, SuperNova said:

There's no way to know for sure but I believe that Abbie is flat out mean a lot of the time.

Oh, I think you're absolutely right.  She wouldn't have done her whole "gentleness challenge" if it wasn't a problem for her.  Thing is, I think it was/is much worse than she lets on.  For every one incident of her losing her cool that she has mentioned, there are probably 10 or more behind the scenes.

4 hours ago, SuperNova said:

I watched all 3 1/2 minutes of the video on mute and Abbie didn't pay a single second of attention to Shiloh. Not even a glance.

She loves cute newborns and the attention they bring her.  But once they're mobile, it really does appear that she has no use for them until they're big enough to start working around the house and serving her.  Then they're great again.

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 hours ago, SuperNova said:

I agree with Abbie. For all that she does to appear like a hip, cool mama, she's really not. She is an incredibly boring and unoriginal person. It's actually kind of remarkable how little actual personality she possesses. 

If Abbie has been approached, I'm guessing two things have stopped her from signing a contract. The #1 reason would be Shaun. He barely allows himself to filmed or photographed and he's made his dislike of social media known. I seriously doubt he would agree to sign a contract that would make his life a public spectacle. #2 reason is that Abbie is a control freak. She wouldn't have total control over editing and optics. It wouldn't always be curated just the way she wants. There's no way to know for sure but I believe that Abbie is flat out mean a lot of the time. It would come through pretty quickly if she was on t.v. The truth of the matter is no one has approached them or she would have immediately made a post to brag about it.  

I watched all 3 1/2 minutes of the video on mute and Abbie didn't pay a single second of attention to Shiloh. Not even a glance. There's a few times where all she would have to do is turn her head because he's right next to her but she never does. Perhaps there's plenty of Shiloh/mama moments that didn't make the cut but it appears that the photographer attempted to include almost all combinations of child/parent. If it wasn't in the vid, it's probably because it didn't happen.

She would come across like a Kate Gosslin on a tv show. I doubt she would like that. 

[ophelia]

44 minutes ago, danvillebelle said:

She loves cute newborns and the attention they bring her.  But once they're mobile, it really does appear that she has no use for them until they're big enough to start working around the house and serving her.  Then they're great again.

THIS! And it I don't understand how all her followers and leghumpers on IG can't see that.

[danvillebelle]

22 minutes ago, ophelia said:

THIS! And it I don't understand how all her followers and leghumpers on IG can't see that.

Oh I think a lot of them are blind to it because they are exactly the same way and see nothing wrong with it.  It would be interesting if some kind of study could be done focusing on how many fundamentalist mothers have clinical NPD.  My admittedly uneducated guess would be that at least 10% of them do.

From the Mayo Clinic webpage on NPD: (this reads like a description of Braggie)

Signs and symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and the severity of symptoms vary. People with the disorder can:

Have an exaggerated sense of self-importance

Have a sense of entitlement and require constant, excessive admiration

Expect to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it

Exaggerate achievements and talents

Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate

Believe they are superior and can only associate with equally special people

Monopolize conversations and belittle or look down on people they perceive as inferior

Expect special favors and unquestioning compliance with their expectations

Take advantage of others to get what they want

Have an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others

Be envious of others and believe others envy them

Behave in an arrogant or haughty manner, coming across as conceited, boastful and pretentious

Insist on having the best of everything — for instance, the best car or office

At the same time, people with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble handling anything they perceive as criticism, and they can:

Become impatient or angry when they don't receive special treatment

Have significant interpersonal problems and easily feel slighted

React with rage or contempt and try to belittle the other person to make themselves appear superior

Have difficulty regulating emotions and behavior

Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change

Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection

Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, vulnerability and humiliation

Edited November 30, 2020 by danvillebelle

[ophelia]

Oh wow. That list just made my jaw drop since it describes Abbie in so many ways.

[Blessings of the Corn]

On ‎11‎/‎27‎/‎2020 at 6:37 PM, SuperNova said:

Honestly this would be my fear. Why wouldn't she just move them right away? He had enough access to eat 4 berries. Thats just flat out parental negligence.

She's decorating. You can see the tree in the background of this b-day post to Simon. Abbie mentions that Shiloh loves Simon the best. Huh, I wonder why that is.

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I HATE this filter she uses for everything. It's truly horrid.

[SuperNova]

Today Abbie is shilling her crappy prints and showing off her boring Christmas decor. It doesn't look very different from her usual tchotchkes except that they're winter themed. Where's all the pretty Christmas colors? A washed out palette isn't very fun for kids. 

Spoiler

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

23 minutes ago, SuperNova said:

Today Abbie is shilling her crappy prints and showing off her boring Christmas decor. It doesn't look very different from her usual tchotchkes except that they're winter themed. Where's all the pretty Christmas colors? A washed out palette isn't very fun for kids. 

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It’s so bland I might fall asleep looking at it.

[Zebedee]

I kinda like the pom-pom thing. Not as a christmas decoration in those colours, though. We have a very small tree (in our very small flat) and I have just turned it into a thing of slightly camp pink and feathery beauty. I'm not usually fond of pink, but it is the perfect counterpoint to the very serious Advent wreath I have.
Usually, I hate the run up to Christmas, but it will just be me, my partner and my ratties this year. Plus, since I haven't really been shopping (except to the garden centre, repeatedly, and I don't even have a garden, just a balcony! My flat now also looks like a garden centre too...) it was nice to have a shopping trip for winter foliage and stuff. 

[Ozlsn]

7 hours ago, danvillebelle said:

She loves cute newborns and the attention they bring her.  But once they're mobile, it really does appear that she has no use for them until they're big enough to start working around the house and serving her.  Then they're great again.

Old enough to be mobile but have learned that she won't fulfil their needs so they don't bother her I think. Shiloh still needs her for practical needs that she can't as easily fob off to the older kids - and he hasn't learned that she won't fulfil his emotional needs so he keeps trying.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Braggie would hate my Christmas decorations and tree. Nothing matches. Much of it is hand made by young children.  Some of it is very old from my childhood. And none of my lights match. But my kids love it and that’s what matters to me. 

[Zommom]

2 hours ago, SuperNova said:

Today Abbie is shilling her crappy prints

I don’t get this business venture? Abbie does zero of the art. It doesn’t seem to hard to sell your own art. I wonder how her business partner got roped into this?

[mango_fandango]

That twin’s hair does not look red to me, it looks brownish. Sorry to burst your bubble Abbie.

And yup, those Christmas prints are dull AF. There’s no green or red. It’s so obviously designed for perfect Insta photos. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

That twin’s hair does not look red to me, it looks brownish. Sorry to burst your bubble Abbie.

And yup, those Christmas prints are dull AF. There’s no green or red. It’s so obviously designed for perfect Insta photos. 

I have red heads in my family and I also don’t think that baby will have red hair. Sometimes a baby will have a pinkish hue to their skin that can trick your eye into thinking the hair is reddish. I have a friend who had multiple babies with strawberry blonde hair that always turned blonde by the time they were toddlers. Not a single one kept the strawberry blonde hair. 

[kesmom]

We have several redheads in our extended family and people are always looking for hints of red in the fair haired babies. I remember thinking that I saw it in a couple of mine but it was just the lighting. The actual redheads (and my strawberry blond nieces) were obviously that way from birth. 

With Abbie I think it’s just IG filters and colors of clothing she tends to put on the babies that makes some people think they are seeing red hair. 

Edited December 1, 2020 by kesmom

[Joe Pukepail]

On 11/29/2020 at 9:08 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Sure, Jan. 
 

I can’t roll my eyes hard enough.

I rolled my eyes so hard they fell out and I had to chase them down. Slippery little buggers, they are!

[mango_fandango]

I have red hair myself. I was a bald baby, so no real hint of what colour my hair would be! I didn’t really grow any hair till I was about 14/15 months. 

[luv2laugh]

She posted an Instagram story with her staring into the camera and the toddler and twins crying with a ? cool, “Waiting for our grocery pick-up and #errrbodyisupset” 

It’s insane, how hard she tries to always be “cool”.

[mango_fandango]

Urgh, Abbie is a shit mother. There is no way I’d be able to leave a baby of mine crying! She’s so self-obsessed, it’s disgusting. “Oh, the babies are crying, better take a selfie and post it to the ‘gram!” NO! BE AN ACTUAL FUCKING MOTHER AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR BABIES!

[Baxter]

She just looks so evil in that picture. It kind of makes me shiver a bit.

 

[Giraffe]

Her errrrrbody upset post is such a pathetic look at me look at me. I went on a rabbit trail search for "people who thrive on chaos." This was one of the articles that popped up. https://exploringyourmind.com/chaos-narcissists-disorder-favors-narcissists/

[feministxtian]

So, upset babies and she's taking pictures? I lose my shit if baby A starts crying...like I will dead stop whatever the hell I'm doing and see to her if I'm watching her. Her parents do the same thing, as does her big sister. NOBODY wants to listen to a baby cry. Hell, my puppy has some separation anxiety and I can't stand listening to her whine and cry either...and she's "just a dog". 

I just can't with these people. 

[Bluebirdbluebell]

They're not even good pictures. Maybe she's mad the little ones are crying. They're less two; why are you so mad?

Why post about it? Why is everything a damn post?  She is so determined to be famous. I'm convinced she will be famous at some point. The question is when fame will it be good fame or bad fame? Will she be another Michelle Duggar playing the devoted mom on television? Or will it be some level of notoriety? People outraged when mom loses it with her kids and caught on video that's going viral!

#fameisnotthesameasgood

Edited December 2, 2020 by Bluebirdbluebell

[JermajestyDuggar]

Narcissists need that constant attention and social media is the perfect way to get it. Social media is filled with narcissists and it is such a turn off for me. 

[FilleMondaine]

Honestly, I like the holiday decorations. I like new takes on traditional decor (in magazines, at least). And children should indeed be exposed to pretty things...as long as they are on the high shelf so that the kids can see but not touch--you know, inspiring your children while also allowing for developmental appropriateness.

She is doing no favors to her smaller kids by not reacting from their crying. Crying (along with sleeping, diaper filling, and eating) are how small babies communicate to their parents. And the lack of attachment-building is going to cause major problems down the road that will cause even bigger headaches for Abbie.

Unless she is playing the long-game of getting to be an even BIGGER martyr in the future. Long suffering mother of dysfunctional adults... Sad thing is that narcissists would absolutely play that game...