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nelliebelle1197

Joe & Kendra 15: Mother/Daughter Pregnancies are So Not Icky

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Glasgowghirl

I don't see anything wrong in dropping Gideon off either, he probably had fun with his aunts and uncles. Joy isn't someone who appears to be ditching her children all the time, it was probably just easier for her to drop Gideon off at TTH for a couple of hours so she could get all the stuff she needed to do a lot quicker than she would with a toddler running around and Gideon gets to have fun with his aunts and uncles. 

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allthegoodnamesrgone
11 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I thought the F’s lived some distance from the TTH. I’m thinking if I was a busy mom and had many things to do before my husband came home from a trip, the last thing I’d want to do is load the kids into the car and drive some distance ( I thought I’d heard 45 minutes) each way.  + you’d have to stay a bit, not just push him out of the car. It seems to me you’ve just lost several hours. 

They are about 20 minutes away, yes I know this and yes I'll see myself to the prayer closet.  :embarrassed:

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Bobology
13 hours ago, clueliss said:

In one if their YouTube videos, I got the impression that Johanna wanted to watch Gideon when Joy dropped him by the big house on her way to an appointment.

I hope in not the same way that the older daughters "liked" doing their brothers' laundry. 😝  If Johanna gets paid by the parent to babysit, and/or doing so gets her out of drudgery (like 'school' or housework) then she probably DOES enjoy being head babysitter for her little nieces and nephews.

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subsaharanafrica
On 10/21/2020 at 5:26 PM, SassyPants said:

I think economics also factors in. The vast majority of people who have access to birth control, control the number and timing of pregnancies.

When I think of “my niece/nephew is older than me” scenarios these days I think of the kids I grew up with who were in that position—they were the children of third/fourth marriages of wealthy men and much younger women who had nieces sometimes a decade older than them because their dad was like 60 when they came along.  

On 10/23/2020 at 6:37 AM, Vivi_music said:

I agree with the previous poster who said it was more common decades ago, mainly before accessible birth control and also before women entered the work force in more massive numbers.

It happened in my own family. My grandmother gave birth to her first child (my aunt) in 1940, at 20 years old.

That aunt went on to get married in 1960 at 20 years old as well. Her first child was born within the first year of her mariage. In the meantime my grandmother was pregnant with her last child at 40. 

Samish story with my dad. He was a surprise when his mom was in her late 40’s. My aunt is 25 years older. My oldest cousin is older than my dad. These genes, I don’t need. 

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AussieKrissy
6 hours ago, Glasgowghirl said:

I don't see anything wrong in dropping Gideon off either, he probably had fun with his aunts and uncles. Joy isn't someone who appears to be ditching her children all the time, it was probably just easier for her to drop Gideon off at TTH for a couple of hours so she could get all the stuff she needed to do a lot quicker than she would with a toddler running around and Gideon gets to have fun with his aunts and uncles. 

And to be fair I wouldn’t judge even  if she dropped him round and got nothing done but sit and stare at her new baby either. Or napped or asked Jana to come give her a hand. That’s what families do. That’s how they should support each other. People are lucky to have that. We build mothers up as super hero’s. But they should ask for and accept help. 
One thing I would recommend (but they won’t use is daycare/preschool). One or two days to herself and one stimulated/educated kid. I know he is a bit young yet. But once he hits three it’s great timing. Until then the TTH house is the closet thing to that(other than maybe church crèche). So therefore I don’t think it’s a bad thing for his socialisation skills. Not perfect but hey, plenty of other things to snark on her for. 

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Don'tlikekoolaid

I saw many fundy women take out their stress, anger and exhaustion on their children. Not just fundys do this I think anyone can get driven to this, so whatever keeps this from happening is a good thing.  Joy is still a child herself, it’s all very sad this quiver full bull crap.  All to take over the vote and rule the country.  

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LillyP
4 hours ago, Bobology said:

I hope in not the same way that the older daughters "liked" doing their brothers' laundry. 😝  If Johanna gets paid by the parent to babysit, and/or doing so gets her out of drudgery (like 'school' or housework) then she probably DOES enjoy being head babysitter for her little nieces and nephews.

I think the reason the younger Duggar girls seem to be excited about babysitting their nieces/nephews is that the novelty of it is still fresh for them. The younger girls obviously have no littles in the house under them to be responsible for around the clock like the older girls. 

 

I don't blame joy for dropping him off to run errands. I would literally jump through fire to have someone watch my toddler while I run errands. My boy is 2.5 and while he's well behaved he is VERY busy. His attention span, like a lot of toddlers, is pretty short. We live in an area where you drive to each store so if I have 3-4 stops to make it's torture taking him in/out of the car and into shops to get all my stuff done. Plus he's very much a homebody....loves to be at home with his toys or outside playing. He does great in the car, but 10 minutes into errands he's in his carseat saying "let's go home now". 

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Iamtheway

I think you’re all forgetting Gideon smeared poop in to the carpet here. I have one kid and I would still feel an overwhelming need for him to be somewhere else for a while if he did that. Mostly so he wouldn’t hear (and repeat) all the swear words I’d be muttering while cleaning, but still ...

We moved closer to my family so that we would have help close by but mostly so that Miniway could have a close relationship to his grandparents and cousins. If you have the option to get help from family I think the day you have to clean sh-t out of your carpet is an excellent day to use that help. 

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OyToTheVey

Since I'm completely childless I won't shame anyone for needing a break. Kids are hard. I think Gideon probably has a lot more fun with his cousins than alone with a baby at home. He's got hoards of kids his own age at the big house, why not use that opportunity. 

 

We can stop mom shaming and shame me if y'all want. I'm single and childless and my aunt volunteered to do my laundry! She does it ever 2 weeks. I work in a pharmacy and pandemic life has been difficult to a point of breakdowns. She's a stay at home wife and has said numerous times that she's bored. The woman started knitting my friends kids sweaters and hats and booties just for something to do. So I take advantage of a bored woman who's always been like a second mom to me. I'm not embarrassed by it at all. She lives 3 blocks away from me. So I drop it off in the morning and she calls me when to pick it up after work. Yes I have time after work to do it. But I don't want to and she's perfectly fine with it. As I mentioned before, being Eastern European, we're used to communal living. We still do it to a certain degree. 

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WiseGirl

The solution for Joy is to get a Ruggable. (Trying to move from the duvet to other household items). I bought one because the dog was using the other throw rug like an amusement park ride. It has stayed and not moved. When one dog vomited in it and a week later one urinated on it. Easy peasy clean up it just goes in the washer. *I don't sell them or work for Ruggable just happy it works.

How did Joy and duvets take over the Joe & Kendra thread? Surely those two have done something of interest lately...right? Anything? Anything at all? Ever?

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SassyPants
23 minutes ago, WiseGirl said:

The solution for Joy is to get a Ruggable. (Trying to move from the duvet to other household items). I bought one because the dog was using the other throw rug like an amusement park ride. It has stayed and not moved. When one dog vomited in it and a week later one urinated on it. Easy peasy clean up it just goes in the washer. *I don't sell them or work for Ruggable just happy it works.

How did Joy and duvets take over the Joe & Kendra thread? Surely those two have done something of interest lately...right? Anything? Anything at all? Ever?

IIRC, one of the Duggars was shilling for that Company. Was it Jinger?

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indianabones
2 hours ago, WiseGirl said:

The solution for Joy is to get a Ruggable. (Trying to move from the duvet to other household items). I bought one because the dog was using the other throw rug like an amusement park ride. It has stayed and not moved. When one dog vomited in it and a week later one urinated on it. Easy peasy clean up it just goes in the washer. *I don't sell them or work for Ruggable just happy it works.

I was skeptical about Ruggable until I dog-sat last month. The dog threw up and peed on one of those things THREE TIMES IN TWO DAYS, and every time he did I threw that thing in the wash and it was like magic. I was sold!

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Idlewild
12 hours ago, SassyPants said:

IIRC, one of the Duggars was shilling for that Company. Was it Jinger?

Yes she was. Joy could have got a discount!

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omgpleasestop

My Mum became a great-grandmother at 60. She has 2 great-grandkids and another 2 coming.
She had her eldest at 19.
Her eldest had her eldest at 21.
Then her eldest had her eldest at 20. 
We live in a multi-generational home. At one stage we had 4 generations in a 3 bedroom+study.
We are a pretty tight-knit family. I have 2 kids. I look after my great-niece at least once a week. I also have my nephew once a week for the day. If my sister or brother, or any of my niece/nephews wanted me to mind their children and I was home (I have my own business from home) they know I'm only a text away. That's just what we do. I also have two girlfriends with children I've babysat on a whim for different things. I'm also quite close with my niece and nephews and I'm always there for them.

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SassyPants
5 hours ago, omgpleasestop said:

My Mum became a great-grandmother at 60. She has 2 great-grandkids and another 2 coming.
She had her eldest at 19.
Her eldest had her eldest at 21.
Then her eldest had her eldest at 20. 
We live in a multi-generational home. At one stage we had 4 generations in a 3 bedroom+study.
We are a pretty tight-knit family. I have 2 kids. I look after my great-niece at least once a week. I also have my nephew once a week for the day. If my sister or brother, or any of my niece/nephews wanted me to mind their children and I was home (I have my own business from home) they know I'm only a text away. That's just what we do. I also have two girlfriends with children I've babysat on a whim for different things. I'm also quite close with my niece and nephews and I'm always there for them.

This sounds wonderful. Where do you live? When we had our kids, 3/4 of our parents were still working, and no one lived close enough to babysit, unless it was organized well in advance. There were no other relatives local either. My own daughter lives in another country. Thankfully her husband’s family is local and the parents are retired. My kids had to go to daycare, which was expensive. Most of us do what we have to do. 

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just_ordinary

My two cents

(1) the problem shouldn’t be that Joy is in the lucky position to get help and has access to babysitters. The problem is that we can assume the sister aunties aren’t as free in their choice of helping as others would be. It the older people in the TTH offer help or respond to being asked that’s great. If they make the younger do so it’s not too great anymore. Add that it’s probably seen as great training for the girls for when they start their own quiver in the not so far away future. The only acceptable future.

(2) WOW. Smearing poop is bad. I only come across such stories when it’s about serious sibling rivalry/ jealousy/ frustration or stress. Hopefully Joy and Austin will take some time to find out what the underlying problem is and help Gideon to adapt/relax if they find it. I

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Bluebirdbluebell

Also it's more of the Duggar not social-distancing due to a pandemic. Joy and Austin went on vacation with a bunch of people including Carlin and Evan, (who I guess no longer have COVID). They went and brought their son to the TTH. And that's not counting anyone they encountered on vacation maskless. 

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SassyPants

When my son was training, he loved to hide in his closet and poop in his underwear. Now he never smeared it around. He was 2 at the time. Is Gideon nearing 3? Maybe it’s time to start the evil potty training? 

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marmalade
9 hours ago, SassyPants said:

When my son was training, he loved to hide in his closet and poop in his underwear. Now he never smeared it around. He was 2 at the time. Is Gideon nearing 3? Maybe it’s time to start the evil potty training? 

Gideon is 2 1/2. A little closer to 3, but Joy doesn't seem to be in a hurry to potty train him.

Edited by marmalade

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Karma

Both my kids smeared poo once.  Fortunately both while at childcare.  My daughter as an 18 month old when in a cot supposedly asleep.  My son, who was fully toilet trained, but naughty, at 3.5 while around a corner out of sight of any staff, all over the wall.  They acted like that was my fault.  Back when he was in nappies he did like to take them off and I was worried about the potential of day time nap poo smearing, so used to tape his nappy on with electrical tape when putting him down to sleep.
 

They’re 24 and 20 now and I’m happy to say never smear poo on walls or in cots these days 😂

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Jatalie1996

Today is Addison's first birthday so I'm calling it now: birthday cake gender reveal from JoKen sometime this week.

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Chewing Gum
2 hours ago, Jatalie1996 said:

Today is Addison's first birthday so I'm calling it now: birthday cake gender reveal from JoKen sometime this week.

Didn't they do the same for Garret's first birthday? Sounds like a tradition if they do. _shudder_

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Jatalie1996
4 minutes ago, Chewing Gum said:

Didn't they do the same for Garret's first birthday? Sounds like a tradition if they do. _shudder_

Yep. So it wouldn't surprise me if that's what they're planning to do again this time. 

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Meggo
18 hours ago, SassyPants said:

When my son was training, he loved to hide in his closet and poop in his underwear. Now he never smeared it around. He was 2 at the time. Is Gideon nearing 3? Maybe it’s time to start the evil potty training? 

:) Mine used to go in a corner and say "I'm busy!" 
We weren't hard core potty trainers - and I don't want to give her any advice - but I'd probably buy a potty for him - just to plant the seed in his little brain. 

And how does one get poop out of carpet??

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allthegoodnamesrgone
12 hours ago, marmalade said:

Gideon is 2 1/2. A little closer to 3, but Joy doesn't seem to be in a hurry to potty train him.

I wouldn't be either with a nursing 2 month old. My kids are about as far apart in age as G & E, and There is no way in hell I would have started potty training my E when my G was 2 months old. He wasn't ready and I didn't have the energy to deal with that a demanding fussing infant and her her big brother needing to potty, even if he HAD been ready. 

Some kids are ready at 2, others aren't ready until closer to 4, and it is my understanding that pediatricians aren't concerned about this until the child is still in diapers at 5.  G won't be 3 until late February, he has a new born baby sister at home, this is NOT the time to be throwing potty training into his life, IMO. 

@Meggo my son would also hide somewhere and I would ask "whatcha doing?" he would say, as he was grunting "NOFFING".  As for getting shit out of the carpet/rug, I personally used baby wipes to pick up the offensive pile (thankfully, while mine would poop on the floor but not smear it around) rub the spot with another wipe, then spray it really good with Lysol, or some other disinfecting spray, wait for it to dry and vacuum. I also have cats and had a dog, so this works for animals as well. 

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