Dillards 87: Experts on Everything!

[Idlewild]

I think JB worships money more than anything else so Joy can reduce her filming commitments ( but not entirely) and Jinger and Jessa wear pants in their private life but none of them publicly question their upbringing or criticise the impact of being filmed thus keeping the gravy train rolling.

Jill and Derick have dented the image and pose a threat to the show and all that lovely TV money. That’s what pisses JB off.

[SassyPants]

I also don’t think that JB cares about having a relationship with any of his kids. He and Michelle care about control and money. Once those elements are gone, the adult kids are of little interest to JB and M. They seem to only show up when filming (AKA revenue) is involved.

[Idlewild]

I know the humpers insist JB is a millionaire, doesn’t need TLC etc and there’s no doubt he’s built up a property & business portfolio but he has a gaggle of barely skilled children who either are or will be having lots of children of their own and have become accustomed to a good life & working on ‘Duggar time’ . If the show ends the speaking engagements and endorsements may start to dry up leaving a big hole in their income. 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

4 hours ago, Idlewild said:

I know the humpers insist JB is a millionaire, doesn’t need TLC etc and there’s no doubt he’s built up a property & business portfolio but he has a gaggle of barely skilled children who either are or will be having lots of children of their own and have become accustomed to a good life & working on ‘Duggar time’ . If the show ends the speaking engagements and endorsements may start to dry up leaving a big hole in their income. 

THIS. Boob is not a shrewd businessman and they are going to be in trouble. Like you said, they do have a sizable portfolio, but many of their properties aren’t actually bringing in income. The RV park? Still not open after owning the land for a decade. Jana’s tattoo parlor? Still vacant. She’s had a business license for 18 months and hasn’t sold anything yet.  It takes them literal years to flip a house.  They gave up on the one they bought at the same time as the Baylor Mansion and are selling it as a ‘fixer upper’ that needs $450k of work. 

Boob lost his hustle years ago and most of his children don’t have it. They will not be able to keep up with their cash flow needs when the show ends. 

[just_ordinary]

I agree that there will probably more children stepping onto a different path in the future. What I am curious about is if there will be a  difference between the brothers and sisters. Women follow their husbands. So they don’t have much choice but to pray and set an example to bring them back, but have to submit to most things. The boys will lead their families. If one of them breaks away it would be a much bigger blow as they will have to actively reject JB. I am pretty sure Jill was pushed by Derrick and didn’t change out of her own will at first. Now, she is doing fine but in the beginning it was extremely hard (and obvious. We all talked how they seem to be extremely unhappy). With the experience of Derick and Jeremy, JB will make sure to only pick more “suitable” candidates in the future. But there is no guarantee.

I would love to see one of the boys make this turn. Maybe getting a real Highschool diploma, vocational training and working to independently support his (reasonable sized) family. Being open about how hard it was to enter the real world and how. Trying his own take on things. I had high hopes for Josiah. He seemed so much closer to Lauren’s dad and her family is a tad less cultish. They also seem to value at least some real education and aren’t scraping by. If he would ask they might agree to support them till he  got some further training. Lauren also seemed to be more into getting her way (it’s up for debate how one think she went about it) and I see her being much closer to her own fam and slightly trying to influence Josiah in that direction. It would surely be for the best.

 

[JDuggs]

Now that all of the howlers, except for Jackson, are young adults, I don’t see any of them veering from the Church of JB. It appears that Justin will become more of a Spivey, but Hillary has let us know that they are as batshit as the Duggars. Being god fearing Republican men who do what JB wants has served the Duggar boys well. The boys will continue to marry fan girls who are happy to join the family. With Josh as their example who wanted more out of life than kicking around NWA, the boys are probably scared into thinking that JB’s way is the best way. I still hope that James’s relationship with Jill will at least open his eyes to options.

[finnlassie]

Right, Jill posted on instagram how the boys decided to just... pour water on all of their (the boys') books in the bathroom. I hate it when people post a pic of their child next to the "crime scene" which she did... but oh my God does it bring back memories of all the bullshit I came up with my sister seeing the video of her air drying the poor, poor wee crinkled books. We came up with bullshit just like this. From "let's give our barbies new hairstyles" to "let's bring our teddies to the mudpit what could go wrong"

[Bluebirdbluebell]

On 12/18/2020 at 3:07 PM, JDuggs said:

Now that all of the howlers, except for Jackson, are young adults, I don’t see any of them veering from the Church of JB. It appears that Justin will become more of a Spivey, but Hillary has let us know that they are as batshit as the Duggars. Being god fearing Republican men who do what JB wants has served the Duggar boys well. The boys will continue to marry fan girls who are happy to join the family. With Josh as their example who wanted more out of life than kicking around NWA, the boys are probably scared into thinking that JB’s way is the best way. I still hope that James’s relationship with Jill will at least open his eyes to options.

Justin has been rumored to have problems with his parents. The rumor is he felt ignored by his parents and one year they forgot his birthday. Those could just be rumors. If there were problems, JB's and Michelle's solution was to marry him off as soon as possible. If any of the younger kids cause trouble, JB and Michelle will probably just marry them off faster. 

[Grace]

48 minutes ago, finnlassie said:

Right, Jill posted on instagram how the boys decided to just... pour water on all of their (the boys') books in the bathroom. I hate it when people post a pic of their child next to the "crime scene" which she did... but oh my God does it bring back memories of all the bullshit I came up with my sister seeing the video of her air drying the poor, poor wee crinkled books. We came up with bullshit just like this. From "let's give our barbies new hairstyles" to "let's bring our teddies to the mudpit what could go wrong"

Kids can be the worst ?

I liked that she said "it could be worse." 

I would have been too mad to take a photo.

[Pecansforeveryone]

I have to say Jill is showings signs of being a fairly chill parent by religiously conservative standards. It is a sign of progress that Jill doesn't post about this showing the "natural" wickedness of children or similar nonsense. 

[Iamtheway]

7 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

Justin has been rumored to have problems with his parents. The rumor is he felt ignored by his parents and one year they forgot his birthday. Those could just be rumors. If there were problems, JB's and Michelle's solution was to marry him off as soon as possible. If any of the younger kids cause trouble, JB and Michelle will probably just marry them off faster. 

If there is any truth to it then it’s not surprising that he feels happy with the Spiveys where everyone seems to love him. 

[AussieKrissy]

9 minutes ago, Iamtheway said:

If there is any truth to it then it’s not surprising that he feels happy with the Spiveys where everyone seems to love him. 

I hope they love him for him and not the c list  fame he can bring them. 

Edited December 20, 2020 by AussieKrissy

[LurkerOverThePond]

9 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

Justin has been rumored to have problems with his parents. The rumor is he felt ignored by his parents and one year they forgot his birthday. Those could just be rumors. If there were problems, JB's and Michelle's solution was to marry him off as soon as possible. If any of the younger kids cause trouble, JB and Michelle will probably just marry them off faster. 

I'm sure that was the reason Josiah was first pushed into relationship with Marjorie Jackson when he was... what? 19 years? And before that he spent considerable time at Alert Camp. He was somehow deemed problematic and JB & Michelle wanted him dealt with.

We haven't heard of Duggarlings attending Alert for a while now, have we? Who was the last manly man who went there?

[nokidsmom]

On 12/18/2020 at 1:41 PM, just_ordinary said:

With the experience of Derick and Jeremy, JB will make sure to only pick more “suitable” candidates in the future. But there is no guarantee.

JB can make sure all he wants to but Derick is a good example of there being no guarantees.   Derick was suitably fundie enough to become JB's prayer partner and see how it all turned out.  

In Derick's case, he had a mainstream upbringing but was going through a "fundie phase" when he encountered JB and Jill.  He got out of that phase after marriage, and IME it's not an entirely unusual thing to see someone go fundie for a time and then snap back to the mainstream.   Jeremy is fundie enough but seems to have a strong personality with his own ideas.   He likely will always be fundie but it will be on his terms, not JB's.   He might not openly oppose JB but I suspect behind closed doors, he has his opinions and I have never gotten the vibe that he likes his father-in-law all that much.   

JB can make super duper sure that he doesn't get another Derick or Jeremy but there's no guarantee that a candidate that satisfies JB's criteria at the time will not change in the future.   People change and any number of events/circumstances can lead to significant shifts in beliefs/attitudes over time.   JB can't control that.

[LillyP]

I actually think there are LESS odds of the younger kid's straying. Yes they've gotten less "parenting" from JB & Michelle, but if Jill/Derrick have taught JB anything, it's to pick your partner wisely. I think he's going to be far more strict in his hunt for suitable husbands for the girls. The boys could *maybe* be a wild card, but I think they're all so emotionally stunted for their ages, like many fundie guys they'll be content with whatever meek young girl comes their way and shows some interest. 

[nokidsmom]

I think early on JB might have been more concerned about suitors who were not genuine fundies and were faking it to snag a Duggar girl.   Some were probably obvious fanboys but JB probably had ways to sniff out the ones did did make an effort to appear fundie.    The possibility of encountering a suitor who was genuine at the time but who might evolve away from the fundie life in the future might not have occurred to him.

[Bluebirdbluebell]

8 hours ago, LurkerOverThePond said:

I'm sure that was the reason Josiah was first pushed into relationship with Marjorie Jackson when he was... what? 19 years? And before that he spent considerable time at Alert Camp. He was somehow deemed problematic and JB & Michelle wanted him dealt with.

We haven't heard of Duggarlings attending Alert for a while now, have we? Who was the last manly man who went there?

They don't talk about it, but they send their boys to ALERT all the time. I can't remember exactly who's gone and who's not. I think almost every son since Joe has gone. Justin and Jackson weren't old enough for the adult version, but I think at least Justin has gone to the junior version. If you look at ALERT's social media, you often see pictures of them there. Also occasionally the family posts pictures of them there. 

 

[SassyPants]

On 12/20/2020 at 10:12 AM, nokidsmom said:

JB can make sure all he wants to but Derick is a good example of there being no guarantees.   Derick was suitably fundie enough to become JB's prayer partner and see how it all turned out.  

In Derick's case, he had a mainstream upbringing but was going through a "fundie phase" when he encountered JB and Jill.  He got out of that phase after marriage, and IME it's not an entirely unusual thing to see someone go fundie for a time and then snap back to the mainstream.   Jeremy is fundie enough but seems to have a strong personality with his own ideas.   He likely will always be fundie but it will be on his terms, not JB's.   He might not openly oppose JB but I suspect behind closed doors, he has his opinions and I have never gotten the vibe that he likes his father-in-law all that much.   

JB can make super duper sure that he doesn't get another Derick or Jeremy but there's no guarantee that a candidate that satisfies JB's criteria at the time will not change in the future.   People change and any number of events/circumstances can lead to significant shifts in beliefs/attitudes over time.   JB can't control that.

Especially if he’s picking teenagers as  partners for his kids. It would be odd if these people didn’t evolve and change their beliefs and behaviors as they mature and experience more of the world.

[Iamtheway]

On 12/20/2020 at 7:59 PM, nokidsmom said:

I think early on JB might have been more concerned about suitors who were not genuine fundies and were faking it to snag a Duggar girl.   Some were probably obvious fanboys but JB probably had ways to sniff out the ones did did make an effort to appear fundie.    The possibility of encountering a suitor who was genuine at the time but who might evolve away from the fundie life in the future might not have occurred to him.

Ben was definitly a fanboy but conviniently also a fundie. 

[Idlewild]

I think future spouses will come from accredited Duggar humper families and they will be very young as JB will think he can get to control them before any pesky independent thoughts. 

[ophelia]

I think future spouses will come from humper families and/or hardcore fundie families. They seem to be close with the Bowers who seem to be even more fundie than the Duggars. I really hope none of the remaining girls have to marry a Bowers since their father Curtis is batshit crazy and shares dangerous conspiracy theories.

[nokidsmom]

13 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

Ben was definitly a fanboy but conviniently also a fundie. 

Yes, he was a fanboy, his interest in Jessa smacked of "creepy fanboy wants girl" but he was OK because fundie. 

I was thinking more of non-fundie type fanboys in my earlier post but didn't make that clear.   Ben is indeed proof that fundie fanboys are OK in JB's book. 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

Boob marries his kids off to families he 1) can control financially or 2) he knows well enough to trust.  'Fundie-ness' is really a secondary consideration. Anna, Bin and Derick fall into bin #1 (really both #1 and #2 for Anna), and not surprisingly, most of the post-scandal spouses fall into bin #2.  Jeremy is a bit of an outlier, but because he was the first post-scandal spouse and was thirsty enough to stay in his lane, Boob made an exception.  

I think he's miscalculated with the Spiveys tho...sure, they've know each other for years, but damn, Hilary can't keep her mouth shut or keep her fangirling in check.  She's going to inadvertently draw attention to both families, and not in a good way. ?

[HeartsAFundie]

10 hours ago, ophelia said:

I think future spouses will come from humper families and/or hardcore fundie families. They seem to be close with the Bowers who seem to be even more fundie than the Duggars. I really hope none of the remaining girls have to marry a Bowers since their father Curtis is batshit crazy and shares dangerous conspiracy theories.

Don't count the Bontragers out either.  Michelle and JB were hanging out with them as well this past fall.  

[Audrey2]

So really icky question... Do you think Jim Bob and Michelle are already starting to think about matching Johanna? I was under the impression that they were quite okay with Joy liking Austin, and we know that their daughters weddings bring more revenue in than their sons.

In no way am I saying who Johanna could be matching up with and really the thought thought is repulsive to me. I don't want to start speculation about future husbands just if Jim Bob and Michelle are putting her in social situations with other Godly young men. I have a very bad feeling that the duggars are going to want their three younger daughters excluding Josie matched up by the time they're 20.

Edited December 23, 2020 by Audrey2