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Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 22


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Continued from here:

 

 

 

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"Pence Fly"

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If you heard a little tiny high pitched voice during last night’s debate saying, “Help me,” it wasn’t the fly. It was Republican senators going down with this administration. Thom Tillis, Lindsey Graham, Joni Ernst, and Martha McSally, who was never elected in the first place, are all buzzing around Mike Pence’s head saying, “Help me.”

I paid close attention to the debate last night. Kamala Harris was expected to prosecute the Trump administration. Mike Pence was expected to deflect, lie, and be condescending and wormy. And though I tried to pay attention, I lost all focus for two plus minutes of the debate. Why was I distracted for over two minutes? Because that’s how long a fly was attached to Mike Pence’s white head.

I was mesmerized. When is the fly going to fly away? Will it leave? Is it stuck to whatever component Pence uses to fossilize his hair? What the fuck is going on with the fly and Mike Pence’s hair! AAAAAAGGGHHHHHH! FLY!!!!

Finally it left, but before it did, it had its own Twitter account. The internet lit up over the fly. If you run outside right now and ask someone for their first impression of last night’s debate, they’ll mention the fly. My readers on Facebook were demanding I draw a fly cartoon. At first, I thought, “Nah. This is an internet thing and that doesn’t always translate to the rest of the world….holy shit. Everybody’s talking about it.”

As soon as the debate was over, on MSNBC, Rachel Maddow, Joy Reid, and Nicole Wallace talked about the fly. When Brian Williams came in, he talked about the fly. On CNN, Anderson Cooper, Chris Cuomo, and Don Lemon were talking about the fly. Over on Fox News, they were talking about the best pumpkin spice recipes for a brisk Autumn afternoon.

Before going to bed around 1:00 A.M, I knew I had to draw a fly cartoon. It’s funny that before the debate, I was wondering what would come out of it for me to draw. I never expected it to be a fly on a Trump goon’s head.

As they say, flies are attracted to shit. And whenever you defend Donald Trump and the “accomplishments” of his administration, you’re talking shit.

And just as he ignored the fly, Mike Pence ignored reality. Mike Pence told Senator Harris, “you’re entitled to your own opinions but you’re not entitled to your own facts.” He said this twice ignoring the FACT he is the main butt poodle for a man who has told over 20,000 lies.

Just like he tried to pretend the fly wasn’t there, Mike Pence, the evangelical, pretends he’s not goon number one for Mr. Grab Them By The Pussy.

Just as he ignored the fly, Mike Pence ignores the fact the Trump administration throws children into baby cages.

Just like he paid no attention to the fly, Mike Pence pays no attention to the fact over 210,000 people have died from the coronavirus.

As he ignored the fly, Mike Pence, head of the Coronavirus Task Force, ignores safety protocols. The woman he sleeps with whom he calls “Mother,” ignored safety protocols and the debate rules last night by coming onto the stage without a face mask.

Just like he ignored the fly, Mike Pence ignored the rules of the debate, talking over his time limit, talking over the moderator, Susan Page, and talking over his opponent, Senator Kamala Harris.

Just like he ignored the fly, he ignored all respect toward Senator Harris and Ms. Page. He ignored respect for the American people, using them as if criticizing the Trump administration’s failure over containing the Trump Virus is somehow attacking the American public.

Fortunately for Mike Pence, Senator Harris and Ms. Page also ignored the fly on his white head. They also ignored the cold sore around his mouth. Herpes much? Mother should have kept her mask on. They ignored the pink eye. Mother should have worn goggles. Quite frankly, someone should have taken his pulse. The guy looked like death and flies were literally landing on him. Can zombies speak other than saying, “Brains”? Except for this zombie, he ain’t got any.

A CNN poll said Kamala Harris won the debate, 69% to Pence’s 39%. Personally, I think the fly came in second. The worm came in a distant third.

Mike Pence is a coward. Mike Pence is a worm. And just like all members, supporters, and cultists of this administration, he’s full of shit. And that’s why flies are attracted to him.

Bzzzzz.

 

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"Trump Militia"

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Yesterday, the FBI, who, despite what Donald Trump will tell you, are the good guys, busted a ring of terrorists planning to kidnap the governor of Michigan. The FBI charged 13 men. Some were plotting to start a civil war. Others were planning to storm the state capitol building.

Gee. Storming the state capitol building in Michigan. Why does that ring a bell? Why does that sound familiar? Why does that….oh yeah! Just a few months ago, rabid rabble rousing fucknuts did storm the state capitol building in Michigan, demanding the state to reopen businesses and to stop a face mask mandate. The capitol-building storming was brought on, encouraged, inspired, motivated, and endorsed by the president (sic) of the United States of America.

A few months ago, Donald Trump tweeted that his militia fucks should “liberate Michigan.” He also encouraged them to “liberate Virginia” and to “liberate Minnesota.” All three of these states have Democratic governors and are considered by Trump to be swing states (Virginia is NOT).

The plans to kidnap Governor Gretchen Whitmer have Donald Trump’s fingerprints all over them.

The FBI has named white nationalists as the greatest terrorist threat in the United States. Not Antifa, not Black Lives Matter (which is a civil rights group), and not even ISIS. Hell, al Qaida is barely even on the radar nowadays. But for more than a year, the White House rebuffed the Department of Homeland Security from making domestic terrorism a priority. Domestic terrorists are Donald Trump’s base.

During the one debate Donald Trump had with Joe Biden, where he was probably trying to give his opponent a virus, Donald Trump played down the threat from white terrorists.

Donald Trump said most of the violence he sees are from groups like Antifa, which isn’t even an organized group. There is no Antifa. There are people who identify as Antifa, but there’s not an actual organization.

After white nationalists and other assorted tiki-torch Nazis marched in Charlottesville in 2017, chanting “Jews will not replace us” and “blood and soil,” Trump said there were good people on both sides.

During the debate, Donald Trump told Proud Boys, another white supremacist hate group, to “stand back and stand by.” Within minutes, the Proud Boys tweeted his words with a brand new logo featuring, “Stand back, Stand by.” Overall, there were over 5,000 tweets from racist individuals inspired by Trump’s shout-out from a national platform in prime time.

Even after the FBI busted the white Michigan terrorists, Trump sent out a tweet, attacking the governor and going after Antifa.

You know who else never showed any appreciation for the efforts by the government to save him? The lindbergh Baby. That little ungrateful bastard.

Donald Trump was also trying to take credit for the FBI busting the Michigan terrorists, even though he’s the one who supported them. Also, Donald Trump refused to use the word “terrorists.”

In fact, most headlines didn’t use the word “terrorists.” Most used “militia.” But let’s call them what they are. They’re terrorists. Again, let’s call them what they are. They’re Trump supporters.

There were inspired, just like the Proud Boys, by Donald J. Fucking Trump. The president (sic) of the United States is endorsing terrorism. He’s encouraging terrorism. And just like his calls for them to be “poll watchers,” he called for them to liberate Michigan. And following his orders, they sought to kidnap and possibly murder a democratically-elected governor of a state.

The Michigan terrorist planned to use explosives, to kidnap Whitmer from her vacation home, to take her to Wisconsin for a “trial” and to do it all before the November election.

Governor Whitmer said, “I knew this job would be hard. But I’ll be honest, I never could have imagined anything like this.” You know, we knew having Donald Trump as president (sic) would be a disaster, but we never imagined it would be anything like this.

How could we have imagined an American president would give shout-outs to hate groups? How could we have imagined an American president would be an apologist for Nazis? How could we have imagined an American president would create new slogans for white supremacists? How could we have imagined an American president would give marching orders to terrorists? How could we have imagined the entire Republican Party would be OK with this? How could we have imagined there would be a base of support that would say, “I’m not a racist but….Nazis? Yeah, OK. I’m voting for him anyway.”?

The Michigan “militia” belongs to Donald Trump. These terrorists are his people and the same kind of people from Michigan who gave us Timothy McVeigh and conducted the Oklahoma City bombing. Why are white supremacists, Nazis, Proud Boys, the KKK, white nationalists, and terrorists the president’s (sic) people? Because white terrorists are the president’s (sic) base of support.

The FBI says white nationalists groups are the greatest terrorist threat to this nation.

That means Donald J. Trump is the greatest terrorist threat to this nation.

 

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"THBBFT Trump"

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Donald Trump has been talking about how great he feels just a week after testing positive from the coronavirus. Well, supposedly a week.

He said he might be invincible and immune from the virus (despite catching it) and his treatment, full of dozens of experimental drugs and steroids, is the cure. What happens when he crashes?

He’s made several videos and some people have expressed concern about whoever was tasked to apply the pounds of orange makeup required for his face. But, looking at the way the makeup was applied, perhaps they used mascara attached to a 14-foot pole. Or, perhaps they used Homer Simpson’s makeup shotgun and it was set on “whore.”

Donald Trump has never looked good. Right now, he looks like what crap looks like that was crapped out by crap.

Today (Saturday), he plans to host an event at the White House, where the last time he hosted an event it turned into a Trump Virus super spreader. Ack!

On Monday, he plans to hold a rally in Florida, where the governor has no restrictions or safety precautions for the virus. I have an idea for Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. If he’s not worried about Trump spreading the virus or holding a super-spreader event in his state, then I challenge him to allow Donald Trump to lick his eyeball.

Maybe, Donald Trump’s steroid crash will occur during Monday’s rally.

With several people from the Trump orbit currently in quarantine from catching or being exposed to the Trump Virus, these events are going to need warm bodies..because all the other bodies are growing cold. Only true sycophants need apply.

And Donald Trump will only want to be surrounded by the true sycophants because a true sycophant will never tell him how he really looks.

Ack!!! THBBFT!!!

Creative note: If you don’t get this cartoon, I’m not going to explain it to you. But, Bloom County was a part of my development as a cartoonist. I was first influenced by Peanuts, then Garfield, and then I graduated to Bloom County. Somewhere between Garfield and Bloom County, I discovered Mad Magazine and the influences of Don Martin and Sergio Aragones still reside somewhere deep inside my brain. In fact, these crowd scenes have Sergio all over them.

I have always loved Bloom County, so seeing Clay do an updated Bill the Cat made me smile.

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