Candy from Joyful Christian Homemaking

[watchdog]

I had forgotten about Candy Brauer.  She's one of my favorite fundies!  She and her husband are going to educate us about coronavirus.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyJZqkD9sdU

ETA: I considered binge-watching her YouTube videos... until I discovered she's uploaded almost 900 of them.  Nope!

Edited February 1, 2021 by Coconut Flan

[watchdog]

Oh, my word.  At first the two of them didn't sound all that different from what I've heard others say, other than they seem to have no consideration whatsoever for the risk at which immunocompromised and other populations are from this thing ("why should I be my brother's keeper"?), but at the 17-minute mark, hubby goes off the rails!  Camp Corona!  Healthy volunteers should be housed together, given 3 squares a day and vitamins and supplements... and they infect you with COVID-19!  Assuming you live through the ordeal, you get a "certificate of completion" at the end and are released back into the wild.  I recommend Candy and whats-his-name (her headship) volunteer to be the first two canaries in the coal mine!  ?

Edited April 3, 2020 by watchdog

[AliceInFundyland]

21 hours ago, watchdog said:

I had forgotten about Candy Brauer.  She's one of my favorite fundies!  She and her husband are going to educate us about coronavirus.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyJZqkD9sdU

ETA: I considered binge-watching her YouTube videos... until I discovered she's uploaded almost 900 of them.  Nope!

There's some interesting bits of Candy. You have to discard like 95% of the box (rapturous planner descriptions and the bible studies). Then you'll find the ufo sighting videos, or the "why I randomly wore a bathing suit" video. Or that whole...90? days of menstruating until God cured me at McDonalds segment of the blog.

I think that poster who came in here and outed her early years in the 90s was some of the juciest dirt I've ever encountered on FJ,

She's a loon.

[watchdog]

I've only briefly sampled a few of her YT videos.  Mainly I was looking for ones with the kids since I've not even thought about her in years.  They're in the car with her and Wunderhubby at the beginning of the recent "vacation" one, but I couldn't stand watching it past the first minute.  Apparently their oldest doesn't live with them now.

I'd forgotten about all this, but someone who allegedly knew her and Erik IRL let it rip.  I went down the rabbit hole for a while tonight.  LOL.

https://www.freejinger.org/topic/19112-joyful-christian-homemaking-all-things-candy/page/9/

[watchdog]

Since rediscovering Candy I've watched a couple of her YT videos, and today's didn't completely disappoint.  Happy clappy Candy is cooking split peas and biscuits for dinner.  Pretty much a snoozefest except the "perfect Christian homemaker" was working in a kitchen with ants (or some kind of small insects) crawling around on the countertop.  At first I thought it was just the black flecks in the Formica countertop, but nope.  It's bugs.  See them scurrying around at the 4:40 mark.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VuSDiS2WD5g

Update:  It's been over 9 months since I rediscovered Candy.  I clicked on the video link above, and she's apparently edited it!  In the original there was a 10-15-second section near the middle in which you could clearly see small black insects scurrying around on the countertop.  Now that section is gone!  There's only one brief flash where you could see a little of the countertop, not enough to see the "spots" moving.  Now there's a quick fade in and out in the middle.  She must read here or someone else pointed it out to her because she edited the video.

Edited January 28, 2021 by watchdog
Update.

[Once_Upon_A_Fundie]

Another Candy fan! I check in on her every month or so. Her blogs are too long and usually regurgitated. She is the epitome of insane, but it's amusing. One of the more harmless fundies.

[watchdog]

Taking one for the team (if anyone is interested) and watched the recent vacation video which begins with her usual pantomimed ? ✌️ Jesus dot blogspot dot com intro.  I was curious to see her kids now that several years have passed.  They look like your typical sullen teenagers, and they all look less than pleased at their mother's babbling and videoing, especially the youngest son.  It's worth noting her daughter seems to have eschewed her mother's headcoverings/skirts-only rule for normal young woman-style pants.

Candy packs her bags accompanied by an excruciating description of every. single. thing. she's packing, including "feminine products."  Her current read is Isaac Asimov's "A Choice of Catastrophes."  And the KJV bible, of course.  And her ubiquitous big-ass planner!

She never said where they were going, but it apparently took all day to get there, and it's going to be cold.  Except nobody is ever shown even wearing long sleeves, much less a jacket.  Candy is flitting around in her little tight summer dresses.

Once on the road, the family lip-syncs "Holiday Road" from "National Lampoon's Vacation."  Oh, there's a mountain!  I don't know where this is though.  Seems like one of the kids or the whole family plan to attend a lot of "activities" and "seminars" of some kind.

I've never seen someone so impressed by a Days Inn or whatever place they're staying.  She spent a good 10 minutes of the video just giving painfully detailed tours of two hotel rooms.  Candy drank one... "a nice little single"... margarita?!  Wow.

Family swims, showers, sleeps, gets up early to eat their *free* hotel breakfast followed by dropping DD off at an all-day activity... that lasted... all day, you know... and the family visited friends and hung out and chilled before getting their *free* hotel supper.  This is the ritziest place Candy has ever seen!

Candy located a "Container Store"!  Candy's in heaven!  She bought two... ✌️! ... packages of magnetic paper clips, y'all!

Each day of their vacation begins with Candy holding up the number of fingers for the day,  Day 2, ✌️ 2 fingers, Day 3, 3 fingers, etc.  My eyes are glazing over.  They get *free* breakfasts and suppers and *up to THREE free* (3 fingers) alcoholic drinks per adult if they choose!  I wonder how many of them imbibed.  Day 4 brings another mystery activity for one of the kiddos.  Yawn.

Oh, now Candy is working out at the hotel gym with a very boobage-revealing little top and yoga/workout pants.  The fam is going to another activity/seminar later, and... now Candy is in bed ready to go to sleep.  At this point, so am I.

Day 5 (?️ five fingers!):  See Day 4.  It's pretty much just more of the same.  Except we see a mountain, a taxidermy display, and Wunderhubby posing in a touristy-looking store.  More mountains... looks like somewhere in the SW U.S., maybe Utah?  Candy and Wunderhubby pose for a kiss.  Then a nausea-inducing FF'ed video of rocks.  Oh, and there's a "balanced rock" formation that Google says is in Garden of the Gods in Colorado Springs, CO.  So that answers that.  We see the fam has donned lightweight jackets now.

The big snow-capped mountain we saw earlier must have been Pikes Peak.  Now they're visiting the Manitou Cliff Dwellings.  And a museum with lots of skulls.  Better watch out, Candy.  Those Manitou may not appreciate having their eternal resting places disturbed.  You might catch an evil spirit there and unknowingly carry it home!  ?

It's now Day 6, and Candy can no longer illustrate which day it is on just one hand, so since her other hand is holding the camera, we have to take her word for it.  The family is about to go partake of their *free* hotel breakfast!  They go for a drive and see snow and an 1800s' ghost town.  There's nothing there.  It's a "ghost" town.  Ha ha.  Okay, Candy.  Wunderhubby videos the rest of the family swimming.  For someone so modest, Candy sure likes to show off her womanly form a lot.

Day 7!  Someone else is holding the camera, so Candy can show us it's Day 7 with 7 fingers.  Following their *free* hotel breakfast they go out and explore.  They saw a herd of big-horn sheep, some more red rocks, two white birds sitting inside a hole in a high rock wall, and some white-tailed deer.  Then a cute squirrel and bunny.

Candy (or someone) bought books in the town where they're staying, C.G. Jung's "Dreams" and Edith Hamilton's "Mythology: Timeless Tales of Gods and Heroes."  I'm frankly kind of surprised.

Day 8, and Candy holds up 4 fingers on each hand because... eight.  One last *free* hotel breakfast, and then it's time to hit the road.  We're treated to them all lip-syncing to "Life is a Highway."

And after a day of driving, they're home.  You're welcome.  Zzzzzzzzzzz....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUsNvVl5RQM

On 4/7/2020 at 1:35 AM, Once_Upon_A_Fundie said:

Another Candy fan! I check in on her every month or so. Her blogs are too long and usually regurgitated. She is the epitome of insane, but it's amusing. One of the more harmless fundies.

I've been away for a long time.  Candy was probably my gateway fundie, after the Duggars, of course.  She was my gateway to FJ for sure.  She's just so... what's the word I'm looking for?  Banal?  She seems a lot more harmless now than she used to.  Her blog (much of it regurgitated tripe from over a decade ago in a long wall of text) isn't fun without the photos and the blog with people commenting.  Worth a look occasionally though.  I still can't believe she's uploaded almost 900 videos in the space of one year.

Edited January 28, 2021 by watchdog
Clarity.

[Once_Upon_A_Fundie]

Same for me. I found this whole fundie world after stumbling upon Sweeping the Cobwebs. That led to Candy and eventually here. 

[watchdog]

I sure miss "Sweeping the Cobwebs"!  Even if the admins decided to not post any new material I really wish they'd left it up for posterity.

[ripples72801]

Candy's oldest son apparently knocked his girlfriend up.  Maybe God directly spoke to him and said it was ok to have sex outside of marriage like He did for his parents.  They are having a boy and he is due in November.

Edited January 28, 2021 by Coconut Flan

[fundiefan]

Never mind. I found it.

Edited October 7, 2020 by fundiefan

[ripples72801]

@Coconut Flan Did I miss or mess something up?  Not sure why you edited? Not trying to start anything just wondering what I did so I can avoid it next time.

[Coconut Flan]

Just form and format to match most of our other titles.  And oops I see I made a typo. 

[Florita]

It appears the couple are about the same age and he's not a cradle-robber like his dad.

Hopefully Candy will skip the righteous indignation act and openly love and accept her grandbaby.

[ripples72801]

11 hours ago, Florita said:

Hopefully Candy will skip the righteous indignation act and openly love and accept her grandbaby.

I hope so, but I am not holding my breath. 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

I don't know anything about this woman -- brief background summary please.

She was a cradle robbed bride who was pregnant?  Was this a fundie scandal? Inquiring minds want to know.

[Caroline]

How did you find out about her son?

Her newest 'blog' is called

Eyes2Jesus.blogspot.com

She's fascinating.

[fundiefan]

6 hours ago, Caroline said:

How did you find out about her son?

Her newest 'blog' is called

Eyes2Jesus.blogspot.com

She's fascinating.

Her son has FB. On it, he says who he's in a relationship with. Her page has "Maddox Landon Brauer 11-17-20" in her tagline. 

On 10/9/2020 at 2:09 PM, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

I don't know anything about this woman -- brief background summary please.

She was a cradle robbed bride who was pregnant?  Was this a fundie scandal? Inquiring minds want to know.

Candy & her history are far to extensive & convoluted to even try to explain. She deletes everything and the history is not there for anyone to see. She thinks she's crafty and elusive. 

Edited October 10, 2020 by fundiefan

[Florita]

Oh, oh. Her menorrhagia is back. Sounds like she's getting some help this time, maybe?

Spoiler

The last time this happened was discussed on FJ here: https://www.freejinger.org/topic/30684-candy-brauer-health-scare/

 

[Starrynight]

I remember Candy! The crazy was strong with her.  Something about aliens and demons? And homemaking binders! ( Her two loves. ?) Her husband is much older than she is and he came off as creepy. Another “headship” that couldn’t keep a job and moved them around a bunch. 

She had one of her babies in her recliner with no outside help. Which I thought was sad on many levels.

 

At one point she diagnosed herself as having Autism and also said she belonged to Mensa. (Maybe...but there was a lot of snark around her self-diagnosis.)

But she always kept a clean house (from what she showed on her blog.)
 

 

[GeraldineGrainger]

On 10/10/2020 at 4:48 PM, fundiefan said:

Her son has FB. On it, he says who he's in a relationship with. Her page has "Maddox Landon Brauer 11-17-20" in her tagline. 

Candy & her history are far to extensive & convoluted to even try to explain. She deletes everything and the history is not there for anyone to see. She thinks she's crafty and elusive. 

I looked at his likes and follows, and apparently he is also into BDSM (and a Trumper, but that's no surprise). This is all so fascinating to me because I have followed Candy for 12 years, and I remember all of her preaching about raising "Godly arrows," or whatever she called them, and all of her rules about what is/isn't acceptable to God. I wonder how she is taking this? I notice that she is not on her son's friends list, which amuses me greatly. 

 

On 10/9/2020 at 2:09 PM, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

I don't know anything about this woman -- brief background summary please.

She was a cradle robbed bride who was pregnant?  Was this a fundie scandal? Inquiring minds want to know.

For those new to Candy's lunacy, this thread has extensive background, including contributions from someone claiming to know Candy in real life, which as I recall led to an epic flounce from Candy.
 

Also, I would be remiss if I didn't include the absolutely epic and hilarious parody of Candy's original blog, Keeping the Home.

https://sweepingthehome.blogspot.com/

These days, Candy is super boring. She mostly makes videos about planners, with occasional Day in the Life vlogs and purse tours, on her Eyes2Jesus YouTube channel.

[ripples72801]

On 10/13/2020 at 7:55 PM, Starrynight said:

She had one of her babies in her recliner with no outside help. Which I thought was sad on many levels.

If I remember correctly, didn't wonderhubs break her water with a non sterilized saftey pin?

[Caroline]

Yes!  Very strange group.

Is that the son who ran away from home when he was twelve or so?

[GeraldineGrainger]

On 10/16/2020 at 5:59 PM, Caroline said:

Yes!  Very strange group.

Is that the son who ran away from home when he was twelve or so?

I'm pretty sure it is. I remember this led to Candy inquiring in several message boards about how to thwart CPS.

[mamallama]

On 10/10/2020 at 5:48 PM, fundiefan said:

Her son has FB. On it, he says who he's in a relationship with. Her page has "Maddox Landon Brauer 11-17-20" in her tagline. 

Candy & her history are far to extensive & convoluted to even try to explain. She deletes everything and the history is not there for anyone to see. She thinks she's crafty and elusive. 

Now I'm going crazy trying to find her son's FB, LOL.

Edited October 20, 2020 by mamallama
Found it!