Mom's Corner by Teri

[PennySycamore]

@Foudeb,  I was reminded by your comment of two commercials that I've seen recently.  One is for Emgality, a migraine medicine.  A little girl asks her mom if she feels ok that day and the mom does so they put on costumes and pretend it is the Middle Ages.  Even the dog gets into the act as he is dressed up like a dragon.  This next is also for some type of medicine (maybe another migraine one) and the mom is busy sewing something.  It becomes apparent that it is Halloween and Mom is putting the finishing touches on the dog's dinosaur costume.  Those kind of things the kids will remember forever.  Or any of the things you mentioned.  

[SPHASH]

New Mom's corner up.  Summer Scheduling.  Because kids can't have fun in the summer.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Does she think she invented the idea of keeping a schedule?  Does she not know all adults understand this concept?

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

Flip Flops at a wedding seems wrong to me.  Walmart sells little ballet flats for cheap.  

Spoiler

 

[fundiefan]

Don't forget to make a list & pray over it before creating your schedule. 

Seriously. Their obsession with schedules is unhealthy. She replaced her obsessing over "negative" feelings with schedules that apparently solve every problem because she never has to think about anything  - the schedule tells her everything she needs o know to get through the day.

How effing miserable must one be to force their kids to live an obsessively scheduled life just so you can get through the day without locking yourself in the closet? 

 

 

[refugee]

23 minutes ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Flip Flops at a wedding seems wrong to me.  Walmart sells little ballet flats for cheap.  

  Hide contents

 

Probably not a problem for them at their age, but those ballet flats cut across the top of my foot in just the wrong place (tendons?) and cause intense pain. I used to love those cheap ballet flats for their inexpensiveness and ability to pair with just about any outfit. It was such a surprise when I bought a new pair (after wearing out my Dansko clogs) to find I couldn’t wear them anymore! 

I now have “nice” sandals that are basically glorified white fake-leather flip-flops, to wear in situations where my sporty clog-style walking shoes would look out of place.

And you’re right, I would see “regular” flip-flops as way too casual, barely a step above bare feet.

12 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

Don't forget to make a list & pray over it before creating your schedule. 

Seriously. Their obsession with schedules is unhealthy. She replaced her obsessing over "negative" feelings with schedules that apparently solve every problem because she never has to think about anything  - the schedule tells her everything she needs o know to get through the day.

How effing miserable must one be to force their kids to live an obsessively scheduled life just so you can get through the day without locking yourself in the closet? 

 

 

I remember talk about Teri suffering from depression. Does anyone know if she was able to stick to those detailed schedules she posted?

I remember buying her book and going through all the steps and making a schedule with the best of intentions and carefully thought-out planning. I was never able to stick to it, though. Life happens.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

29 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

Don't forget to make a list & pray over it before creating your schedule. 

Seriously. Their obsession with schedules is unhealthy. She replaced her obsessing over "negative" feelings with schedules that apparently solve every problem because she never has to think about anything  - the schedule tells her everything she needs o know to get through the day.

How effing miserable must one be to force their kids to live an obsessively scheduled life just so you can get through the day without locking yourself in the closet? 

 

 

I believe the scheduled life is their goal, but do we believe that's followed regularly?

I'd bet there are a non-zero amount of days a week where Teri is completely checked out, schedules be damned.  I mean, if you could actually cure depression via schedules wouldn't there be far fewer sufferers out there?

Cross posted with @refugee about whether she can stick to it.  Does anyone know a ballpark number for the Maxwell audience?  Not snarkers, people actually following them.

I wonder how many people aren't getting treatment for things because they make it seem like you can schedule depression away.

[Hane]

Let’s not forget all the time Mom Maxwell spends alone in her room “reading the Bible.” This has to have come straight from Sarah’s observations of Teri.

[VooDooChild]

Am I having a stroke that is affecting my comprehension abilities or is this Mom's Corner that poorly written?

 

[Black Aliss]

6 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Flip Flops at a wedding seems wrong to me.  Walmart sells little ballet flats for cheap.  

  Hide contents

 

If Abby is anything like my kids, at 13 her feet are growing so fast they can't keep her in shoes. For one in particular from a women's size 5 to women's 11 in a matter of months. Plus her feet hurt like hell from all the tension on her ligaments and muscles, not to mention the growing bones, and flip flops were the only thing that were even remotely comfortable. Although now I see Melanie is also wearing flip flops. So, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. I'd rather see all of them in flip-flops than any one of them waving a Trump sign.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

15 hours ago, Black Aliss said:

If Abby is anything like my kids, at 13 her feet are growing so fast they can't keep her in shoes. For one in particular from a women's size 5 to women's 11 in a matter of months. Plus her feet hurt like hell from all the tension on her ligaments and muscles, not to mention the growing bones, and flip flops were the only thing that were even remotely comfortable. Although now I see Melanie is also wearing flip flops. So, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. I'd rather see all of them in flip-flops than any one of them waving a Trump sign.

I thought that was Sarah, is it Abby?  

18 hours ago, VooDooChild said:

Am I having a stroke that is affecting my comprehension abilities or is this Mom's Corner that poorly written?

 

It's not you, that's the level of communication skill of the queen of homeschooling.  

I am always struck by how completely devoid of warmth Teri's writing is.  Always, even when responding to comments.  None of the Maxwell's exude warmth, but she's particularly chilly.  I've said it before but she scares me more than Steve.  Steve is lost and crazy, but I think on some level he does love his kids and things his oppressive nightmare is in their best interests....I can't cut her the same kind of slack as she seems to give no fucks as long as she's left alone and doesn't have to do anything for more than 15 minutes at a time.

[ClareDeLune]

I think it's Sarah. I also feel flip flops maybe their downtime shoes, after wearing probably uncomfortable formal shoes for the wedding.  If they are at home a lot they probably dont wear formal shoes very often and flip flops are good for pinched toes.

[fundiefan]

It's Mary wearing flip flops & hugging Anna. Sarah was in a long dress that day. And looking at their original posts of wedding pictures, the outfit matches what Mary had on. 

See the pictures posted in September 2020

[HerNameIsBuffy]

3 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

It's Mary wearing flip flops & hugging Anna. Sarah was in a long dress that day. And looking at their original posts of wedding pictures, the outfit matches what Mary had on. 

See the pictures posted in September 2020

Huh.  The lighting must be so weird to make Mary look blonde.  

[Bluebirdbluebell]

That has to be Abby I think. Mary and Anna were bridesmaids. If that is Mary, then she changed her clothes after the wedding. Sarah was wearing a long black dress.

[Black Aliss]

5 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Huh.  The lighting must be so weird to make Mary look blonde.  

Yeah, I wouldn't hire that photographer.

[fundiefan]

3 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

That has to be Abby I think. Mary and Anna were bridesmaids. If that is Mary, then she changed her clothes after the wedding. Sarah was wearing a long black dress.

She did. 

And Abby did not wear flip flops and had a different dress & skirt on. And her hair isn't as long as Mary's. 

The pictures on the blog show Mary in that outfit while getting ready, then again saying goodbye. 

Edited June 9, 2021 by fundiefan

[Hane]

On 6/8/2021 at 5:21 PM, Hane said:

Let’s not forget all the time Mom Maxwell spends alone in her room “reading the Bible.” This has to have come straight from Sarah’s observations of Teri.

Quoting to correct myself: I meant “Mom Moody.”

[mango_fandango]

It’s Mary.

I went and looked at Part One of the photos, and there’s one of Mary looking in a mirror, she’s wearing the same top.

 

Spoiler

 

 

Spoiler

Abby was wearing a blue dress with dark cardigan, there’s a group photo in Part One.

[refugee]

On 6/8/2021 at 11:28 AM, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I believe the scheduled life is their goal, but do we believe that's followed regularly?

I'd bet there are a non-zero amount of days a week where Teri is completely checked out, schedules be damned.  I mean, if you could actually cure depression via schedules wouldn't there be far fewer sufferers out there?

Cross posted with @refugee about whether she can stick to it.  Does anyone know a ballpark number for the Maxwell audience?  Not snarkers, people actually following them.

I wonder how many people aren't getting treatment for things because they make it seem like you can schedule depression away.

And ADHD. After being diagnosed and starting on meds recently, for the first time in my life, I can manage what needs to be done. It’s like I’ve been in a fog all my life, up until now.

So I really didn’t need to pray harder, or keep trying harder, or get up earlier and stay up later, or start my day with a “quiet time”, or even submit more. What I really needed was someone to listen to me without condemnation, to take my symptoms seriously and not label them as sin that I needed to deal with to “get right”, and, as it turns out, a simple medication regime.

[mango_fandango]

@refugee I have ADHD too so I can sympathise. Routines can definitely be useful with ADHD but I’d have trouble setting one up myself. I quite liked the routine of school, knowing that I had English first thing on a Tuesday and it was in room C (making this up. Our classrooms did have letters but room C was actually a maths room). I’m glad the medication is helping! I have been prescribed it but I’m not actively using it right now. If I had a full time job I’d definitely use it.

[MomJeans]

I don't think Terri's schedule-paloozas stop her depression.  I think on good to medium days, they helped her focus on the bare minimum that had to be accomplished, and to put one foot in front of the other.  And on bad days, it likely helped her kids function without her. 

Needing and using schedules are an area that (and it KILLS me to say this) have saved my family with online learning this year.  It hurts me that in the Venn Diagram of Life, I share something with the Maxwells.   We just finished school, and my master schedule was terrifyingly Maxwellian.  It was an entire whiteboard I hung in the hallway, color coded for each kid.  Taking it down yesterday for the Summer felt good.

@mango_fandango My youngest has ADHD, and she was the only kid who requested a Summer schedule. We made it this morning together. 

Edited June 11, 2021 by MomJeans
typo

[fundiefan]

7 hours ago, MomJeans said:

I don't think Terri's schedule-paloozas stop her depression.  I think on good to medium days, they helped her focus on the bare minimum that had to be accomplished, and to put one foot in front of the other.  And on bad days, it likely helped her kids function without her. 

Needing and using schedules are an area that (and it KILLS me to say this) have saved my family with online learning this year.  It hurts me that in the Venn Diagram of Life, I share something with the Maxwells.   We just finished school, and my master schedule was terrifyingly Maxwellian.  It was an entire whiteboard I hung in the hallway, color coded for each kid.  Taking it down yesterday for the Summer felt good.

@mango_fandango My youngest has ADHD, and she was the only kid who requested a Summer schedule. We made it this morning together. 

You do not have anything in common with Teri / the Maxwells. 

You are doing what works for you, in your home, with your children while living your life. 

You are not doing something because you have no other way to function / believe your god told you to do it / bought into someone else'ss idea for your life / paid money to people who obsessively schedule their entire lives and think you should to.

When you have a family of your own and you figure out what works best for your family at any given time, you are not Maxwellian. You are, in fact, anything but. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

16 hours ago, refugee said:

And ADHD. After being diagnosed and starting on meds recently, for the first time in my life, I can manage what needs to be done. It’s like I’ve been in a fog all my life, up until now.

So I really didn’t need to pray harder, or keep trying harder, or get up earlier and stay up later, or start my day with a “quiet time”, or even submit more. What I really needed was someone to listen to me without condemnation, to take my symptoms seriously and not label them as sin that I needed to deal with to “get right”, and, as it turns out, a simple medication regime.

ADHD here too and yes, meds changed my life.  Years ago when I went to get back on ADHD meds I thought I'd deal with that first and then deal with the anxiety....but my ADHD meds kill my anxiety down to normal levels except when something extraordinarily bad is going on in my life.  There is a difference between anxiety as it's own thing, and the constant anxiety people with untreated ADHD feel due to the hypervigilance of trying to keep everything on track.  

(By untreated I don't mean lack of meds, meds aren't a silver bullet and not appropriate for everyone.)

31 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

You do not have anything in common with Teri / the Maxwells. 

You are doing what works for you, in your home, with your children while living your life. 

You are not doing something because you have no other way to function / believe your god told you to do it / bought into someone else'ss idea for your life / paid money to people who obsessively schedule their entire lives and think you should to.

When you have a family of your own and you figure out what works best for your family at any given time, you are not Maxwellian. You are, in fact, anything but. 

This.  The fact that you tailored your routine so each of your kids get what they need @MomJeans means you see them as individuals and parent accordingly.  Maxwells didn't invent scheduling, I've used schedules and frankly far more elaborate cleaning charts and task lists than Teri could ever dream up to manage my ADHD for decades.  

Seriously, I have cleaning charts so detailed  with nested subtasks my kids could use them as evidence to get me into some kind of support group.  But I only made these for me....I never claimed they would work for anyone else and I never expected my kids to follow them.

When you start posting your schedules here and demanding we all follow them lest we be destined for eternal hellfire then you'll share something in common with the Maxwells.

Edited June 11, 2021 by HerNameIsBuffy

[Black Aliss]

3 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

ADHD here too and yes, meds changed my life.  Years ago when I went to get back on ADHD meds I thought I'd deal with that first and then deal with the anxiety....but my ADHD meds kill my anxiety down to normal levels except when something extraordinarily bad is going on in my life.  There is a difference between anxiety as it's own thing, and the constant anxiety people with untreated ADHD feel due to the hypervigilance of trying to keep everything on track.  

I totally agree. I took ADHD meds for a few years and it made a world of difference in that I was no longer in the grip of anxiety over all the things I needed to do to be productive that I wasn't getting done. But what I remember most is getting a buzz from a cup of coffee--something that had never happened before. The meds apparently stimulated my brain to a normal level so I experienced what normal people do when they drink coffee.