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Justin and Claire: Woe Is Me


Coconut Flan

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22 minutes ago, lumpentheologie said:

I think it's very weird they didn't wait to announce until he was 18, especially since that's less than a month from now. Pre-courting at 16 is just ridiculous, even for the Duggars. 

I think they didn't wait to announce because that's when they are going to announce the engagement.

I think they will marry sometime between mid-december and her 20th birthday. That way theire ages are 18, 19 instead of 18, 20 if they wait until after Claire's birthday.

Sidenote: I love the name Claire.

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bec but Justin's chin-beard situation is really bad. I feel pretty confident in saying they're announcing the courtship now because they're already engaged/ about to be and have a wedding planned November/December after Justin turns 18. It'll be interesting to see what a covid-19 wedding looks like for the Duggars, especially with it being filmed and broadcast. The producers do seem to be taking it fairly seriously (interviews over video chat).

I think the last/only time Justin was featured in an episode it was when Jinger was selling a car? And he and Pastor Caldwell did the mechanics for her. He was quite young then and it sounded like they were already training him to be a mechanic, so he does potentially have skills and employment not completely reliant on JB.

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Claire's now-public Instagram account is also following Katey Nakatsu. I wonder who will be the next courtship announcement- her or Lauren Caldwell?

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10 minutes ago, wendy-sparkles said:

I feel pretty confident in saying they're announcing the courtship now because they're already engaged/ about to be and have a wedding planned November/December after Justin turns 18.

 

This is the other reason I felt sad reading this. I completely agree with you. I really wish Michelle and JB would wake up and realize marriage actually isn’t some magic answer to normal teenage hormones. Was he in Jill’s parenting group? Maybe she could help him put off marriage for at least a couple more years. 

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10 minutes ago, Giraffe said:

This is the other reason I felt sad reading this. I completely agree with you. I really wish Michelle and JB would wake up and realize marriage actually isn’t some magic answer to normal teenage hormones. Was he in Jill’s parenting group? Maybe she could help him put off marriage for at least a couple more years. 

I think Justin is in Jessa’s group.

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I think this is really when most people are gonna have a hard time keeping up with the new couples/babies. I've been following the Duggars for years and I wouldn't know Justin if he walked up and said hi to me. All the howlers just run together. It's possible we could see a longer engagement from these two. Not only will it make the audience more invested in a couple they hardly know but there's covid and his age. Seventeen years old and about to be engaged? They should be ashamed, not celebrating, but what's new?

He looks like he should be going to homecoming as a freshman.

 

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First, I love the thread name. 

I don't know why, maybe how they worded the announcement, saying they have been together for many months (I think he proposes the last conference was it ATI or IBLP?) That the families knew each other from more than 20 years or something else but I think they will not wait long for marriage, at max till Valentine's day...can you imagine? It will be just before her bday and "it will be special to get married in the love day" "we will always remember this day" etc etc barf

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What on earth is the boy going to do to feed his family ? I don't believe that a reality TV star, even a relatively successful one like JB Duggar, can make enough money to feed twelve adult children (I am being generous and assume that some of the girls will marry men who actually work), as well as their spouses and children forever. But then, I don't know the budget of these TV channels. How much money can he realistically have, and how might he invest it in order to allow his children to make a decent living ? If he really tries to finance his children and their families entirely, he would need something like 15-20 million dollars, just for one generation. That seems completely unrealistic to me.

I mean, for this second generation alone, we are talking about 80-90 people (I assume 10-12 dependant children, plus spouses, plus 5-6 children each) entirely dependant on the payroll of a TV network. For decades. Is that sustainable ?

Edited by ignorantobserver
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I think this is the first courtship I actually predicted correctly.  Pretty sure that Justin Instagram is legit as well.  Claire tagged it and Joy and Jinger also follow

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Sometimes I ask myself if maybe with time, Jim Bob and Michelle have become more media savvy, allowing the girls to dress ''modest modern'', saying they accept their girls who wear pants now (like that tearful and weird Jinger segment on CO), toning some of their beliefs, etc.

And then this happens. Do they expect secular people (outside fundamentalism) to think this is normal? Do they think it will roll off like water on a duck's back? That there won't be an outcry or criticism from the public? It might be normal in their circle, but JB and M must know it is not common outside fundie circles. Especially since they lived a secular life before. I know both of them got married at the age, but even in 1984, 18 was considered a young bride and groom.

Of course, everyone on Free Jinger here is seeing the ridiculousness of it all. I think most of us have a critical eye on the dangers of fundamentlism and are here to expose that. But the casual viewers, the ones who usually might not see anything bad with ATI/IBLP, I think even for them, this will be a hard pill to swallow. (Or not... some leghumpers sometimes astonish me).

Edited by Vivi_music
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Just now, Vivi_music said:

And then this happens. Do they expect secular people (outside fundamentalism) to think this is normal? Do they think it will roll like water on a duck's back? That their won't be an outcry or criticism from the public. It might be normal in their circle, but JB and M must know it is not common outside fundie circles. Especially since they lived a secular life before. I know both of them got married at the age, but even in 1984, 18 was considered a yung bride and groom.

But would the association for the general public really be "religious fundamentalism" ? From a middle-class standpoint, marrying at 18 is a horrible, life-altering catastrophe, but... well... the Duggars are not really the epitome of bourgeois respectability. From what I know about reality TV, getting married and having children far too young is completely common in the circles featured in these shows, or at least is presented as such. I suspect people would associate this more with "uneducated, rural working class" than with a cult mindset.

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2 hours ago, Giraffe said:

He’s not even a legal adult yet! Any bets he’ll propose on his 18th birthday? I know some people have good marriages to their high school sweetheart but I really hope they have a longer pre-engagement and engagement than normal. 

That’s true, but she isn’t even his high school sweetheart. He never dated, never experienced any sort of freedom away from his parents and now he’s “courting” (that word just makes me wanna puke) someone who was essentially picked for him. Fuck this whole Duggar approach to relationships, it cages the second generation kidults so much. 

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3 minutes ago, Vivi_music said:

Sometimes I ask myself if maybe with time, Jim Bob and Michelle have become more media savvy, allowing the girls to dress ''modest modern'', saying they accept their girls who wear pants now (like that tearful and weird Jinger segment on CO), toning some of their beliefs, etc.

And then this happens. Do they expect secular people (outside fundamentalism) to think this is normal? Do they think it will roll like water on a duck's back? That their won't be an outcry or criticism from the public. It might be normal in their circle, but JB and M must know it is not common outside fundie circles. Especially since they lived a secular life before. I know both of them got married at the age, but even in 1984, 18 was considered a yung bride and groom.

Of course, everyone on Free Jinger here is seeing the ridiculousness of it all. I think most of us on here have a critical eye on the dangers of fundamentlism and are here to expose that. But the casual viewers, the ones who usually might not see anything bad with ATI/IBLP, I think even for them, this will be a hard pill to swallow. (Or not... some leghumpers sometimes astonish me).


 

I actually think this is why a lot of 'normal' people are watching. For stuff you dont see in regular life. Having 19 babies or marrying when you are 17 years old while you have never spend a second alone or had any physical contact with the person you have to spend your life with. Knowing that divorce isn't an option even when you grow up and see the world different.

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I think Justin is working as a mechanic under Paul Caldwell, but since the Spivey seems to have a flourishing business down in Tx and I bet that like basically all the Duggar male he knows some construction/flipping works could he leave the compound and go to live next to his future in-laws? I have watched Claire's mom insta and they seem to have a very nice Rv and generally living a good life for fundies so he JB could be tempted to have a stronger connection in Tx. If Justin moves next to the inlaws this could also help realize some of the financial pressure at home, just based on their age, and barring any possible problem Claritin could give Joe and Kendra a run for their money on #of kids, not having them in the compound could save money for the other couples 

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4 minutes ago, DLA said:


 

I actually think this is why a lot of 'normal' people are watching. For stuff you dont see in regular life. Having 19 babies or marrying when you are 17 years old while you have never spend a second alone or had any physical contact with the person you have to spend your life with. Knowing that divorce isn't an option even when you grow up and see the world different.

Yeah, casual viewrs who tune in because it is so different from their own reality. So basically kind of like watching a freak show or a train wreck? (Sorry, I think I'm both laughing and crying) ??

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2 hours ago, SweetLaurel said:

If this happened in one of my kids' schools, we'd all assume she was knocked up.  Man - the repercussions if she was... 

Well, uh, thank god they didn’t go to evillll school then right?

this whole thing is justttt sad

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1 hour ago, Tatar-tot said:

The only thing on a 17 year old boys brain is SEX.  Seventeen year old Boys are too emotional immature to get married, work full time & raise a family. Plain & simple.
I am done.....next!!!!

I would argue that goes for the big majority of young people around that age not just boys.

There are very few that stick out and are already more mature than their peers, with a clear view and deep longing for those long term/life long commitment and the resources (mentally, rationally and enough self sufficiency) to do so. Some leave school at 16 and start job training. There are some that have already moved out and take care of themselves at that age. Sometimes successful sometimes not so much. It’s a small group but it exists. Also, in my experience this whole your twenties are for college, party and travel is a bit of an exaggeration. You can always travel and party. Many people go back to an educational institution for another degree to boost their career. Most people in their twenties move out at one point and have to earn at least some money (even if their parents still sponsor them) and deal with insurances, landlords, bosses/teachers, telecom companies. They have to make sure the fridge is filled, the trash goes out and they have clean clothes. The second you leave the nest you cannot avoid to start adulting.
But of course we are dealing with special kind of mindset here. Those kids are brainwashed into set roles and furthermore seem more like their parents ministry and another storyline than being raised, supported and loved as individuals. They are infantilised in their cult and miss basic experience regarding relationships (not just romantic ones). I wouldn’t even doubt they truly believe they are their one and only significant other brought together by God. Admitting anything else would probably terrify them to the core. 

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I agree they are super young and it is sad - but - couldn't they still have a long courtship/engagement? Carlin and Evan seemed young and immature and Gil made them wait like a full year longer than her siblings to get married. I'm holding out hope they will court for a year and be engaged for at least several months (though not holding my breath for it). 

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Sooner or later, there’ll be another Duggar scandal. And by that, I don’t mean that some other sibling has groped or abused someone, but I just don’t believe all of these marriages will work out. That’s just damn unlikely... 

Maybe Justin and Claire will have a strong, healthy, long relationship and I don’t wish them anything but happiness. But eventually, some kidult’s courtship will lead to an unhappy marriage so that there’ll be a divorce or cheating or something along those lines. Aside from that, it’s likely that among 19 kids, at least one is gay. This (and I’m not speculating who it might be and certainly don’t suspect Justin, I don’t even really know who he is) might also lead to issues (divorces, a break with the cult and/or the family) in the future. All our snark aside, just imagining someone in their cult having to go through such emotional trauma makes me incredibly sad. No one deserves this and I do hope none of the second gen Duggarlings are gay for their own sakes. 

Now, for the Duggar children’s sakes, I hope every one of them will be happy with their IBLP-condoned quick courtships and arranged marriages. Cause that’s all they can get without either remaining singles or breaking with their parents’ beliefs. But I cannot really get myself to trust that that’s how it’ll turn out. 

Edited by FluffySnowball
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This is probably my cue to take a rest from the Duggars for a while because I was sitting at the lab waiting for blood tests trying to understand what is happening here and genuinely began to wonder at what point the this became 16 & Pregnant/Teen Mom? Did a venn diagram and the overlap is completely astounding. 

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